White Woman Lists All The Things She Had To Learn After Marrying A Black Man, Goes Viral
Pamela Chandler got seriously fed up with all the posts in her social media feeds arguing that ‘racism isn’t a thing’. People in her online social circles were saying they are tired of the protests and didn’t understand Black Lives Matter. So, to give everyone a chance to broaden their worldview, Pamela — a white woman who is married to a black man — shared an open letter on Facebook about how racism has shaped her family’s everyday life.
And it really resonated with people. Pamela’s post has received over 124,000 reactions and 127,00 shares, and the numbers just keep getting bigger.
Image credits: Pamela Chandler
Image credits: Walter Chandler
Image credits: Pamela Chandler
Image credits: Walter Chandler
“Me and Walter met seven years ago on Twitter,” Pamela told Bored Panda. “He retweeted something I wrote, we started talking and never stopped.”
Fast forward a year after the two of them started chatting online, and Walter moved from the Bronx in New York City to Ohio to marry Pamela. The similarities in their sense of humor and core values, like faith, love, and family, were just too strong.
Image credits: Walter Chandler
The woman has received so much positive feedback over her post that she even created a family blog, called The Chandler Crew to connect with like-minded people all over the globe.
But as much as Pamela is happy that she got people to talk about such a difficult subject, she is still bothered it was her, a white woman, whose perspective has been going viral when “plenty of people of color have spoken to these issues many times.”
Image credits: Walter Chandler
“I’ve always known that we [as a society] needed to work for more racial unity but I got an inside and unique perspective of what it’s like to live as a different race by being married to a black man,” Pamela explained.
However, the woman doesn’t think that our racial problems are too big for us; Pamela still believes we can untangle them. “I see society improving. People are willing to talk about it, engage, learn, and try to be better humans. I think we are all trending upwards as a society, and I think that’s great.”
But still, it bothers her that it’s her perspective — that of a white woman — that’s going viral when “plenty of people of color have spoken to these issues many times.”
Here’s what people said after reading Pamela’s post
Once again, the only thing I want to say is: the US is such a f****d-up country
I live here and it has become so much worse since the orange one sitting in the white house.
Load More Replies...The difference is that it's your choice based on your values while for a black guy, it's because it's an hostile environment.
Load More Replies...Don't quite understand why the greetings card thing is a problem. Pick ones without people on them! Never understood why anyone wants random strangers or depictions of people they don't know on cards anyway. Go with the scenes of nature, animals, or weird and wonderful images - there is so much choice. Create your own! Also, and more seriously, any fella who looks like he's on his own gets eyed up warily by parents.
I didn't get that either. I don't even get greeting cards with people on them.
Load More Replies...Replace 'black' with 'brown' and you have our life in Ohio too. My husband is Mexican, and in some ways they are even more hated in this country. People accuse him of stealing their jobs, being illegal, and everything in between. Thank god he is a funny guy and can joke his way out of almost every nasty comment, but it wrecks me. I can relate to every one this woman's issues.
Yes, definitely. The one I hate the MOST is when a white person asks my spouse a question, (then without giving him time to answer) looks at me and snidely says, "Does he speak English?!?!" My spouse speaks two languages both fluently and eloquently...
Load More Replies...Yep, dear racists, just because it isn't happening to you, doesn't mean it's not happening. Sad.
As a mixed race South African person who was 16yrs old when Nelson Mandela was released; who was in the inaugural class of non-whites to attend certain schools and whose first love and father of my child was white...THIS. We were together for 4 years and people would seriously start singing "Jungle Fever" at us randomly. Unfortunately he died before meeting his beautiful daughter but had he lived I don't doubt we would have received some form of racism for eternity...
Move to the UK. Lots of mixed raced couples - we're one of the and we do have those troubles. Land of the free yeah right.
I was in a mixed raced relationship for a while and never had any problems in the UK either.
Load More Replies...Biracial couples are such a normal thing in Los Angeles. I can totally understand this isn't the norm, but it should be.
I agree completely Dorothy. Ironically, multiple-ethnicity IS actually the majority .... it's just that it's either not known, or denied, or never questioned if the ethnicities are similar enough in appearance that it's rarely questioned. As a 'bitsa' myself (bits of this, and bits of that
Load More Replies...That's just unbelievable. And in a way, I can relate to some of these things as a woman in a (still) quite patriarchal society.
I second what giovanna says. Also, I relate to some of these being an immigrant, but here, both parties are Americans, no? I mean, in my case, it can be frustrating sometimes, but I kind of understand why things are the way they are, but for this couple, there's no excuse for discrimination.
Load More Replies...When I was younger I always wished for a greencard. Now I see with fright how things evolved in the US, not only in "racial" concerns (maybe this is as it is since white people fell into this country and stole it from the natives) but also in thoughtfulness, social interaction, human sense and politics, or let's say what Trump has made out of it. Things really have to change. And don't tell me it's none of my business - it effects the entire world.
Once again, the only thing I want to say is: the US is such a f****d-up country
I live here and it has become so much worse since the orange one sitting in the white house.
Load More Replies...The difference is that it's your choice based on your values while for a black guy, it's because it's an hostile environment.
Load More Replies...Don't quite understand why the greetings card thing is a problem. Pick ones without people on them! Never understood why anyone wants random strangers or depictions of people they don't know on cards anyway. Go with the scenes of nature, animals, or weird and wonderful images - there is so much choice. Create your own! Also, and more seriously, any fella who looks like he's on his own gets eyed up warily by parents.
I didn't get that either. I don't even get greeting cards with people on them.
Load More Replies...Replace 'black' with 'brown' and you have our life in Ohio too. My husband is Mexican, and in some ways they are even more hated in this country. People accuse him of stealing their jobs, being illegal, and everything in between. Thank god he is a funny guy and can joke his way out of almost every nasty comment, but it wrecks me. I can relate to every one this woman's issues.
Yes, definitely. The one I hate the MOST is when a white person asks my spouse a question, (then without giving him time to answer) looks at me and snidely says, "Does he speak English?!?!" My spouse speaks two languages both fluently and eloquently...
Load More Replies...Yep, dear racists, just because it isn't happening to you, doesn't mean it's not happening. Sad.
As a mixed race South African person who was 16yrs old when Nelson Mandela was released; who was in the inaugural class of non-whites to attend certain schools and whose first love and father of my child was white...THIS. We were together for 4 years and people would seriously start singing "Jungle Fever" at us randomly. Unfortunately he died before meeting his beautiful daughter but had he lived I don't doubt we would have received some form of racism for eternity...
Move to the UK. Lots of mixed raced couples - we're one of the and we do have those troubles. Land of the free yeah right.
I was in a mixed raced relationship for a while and never had any problems in the UK either.
Load More Replies...Biracial couples are such a normal thing in Los Angeles. I can totally understand this isn't the norm, but it should be.
I agree completely Dorothy. Ironically, multiple-ethnicity IS actually the majority .... it's just that it's either not known, or denied, or never questioned if the ethnicities are similar enough in appearance that it's rarely questioned. As a 'bitsa' myself (bits of this, and bits of that
Load More Replies...That's just unbelievable. And in a way, I can relate to some of these things as a woman in a (still) quite patriarchal society.
I second what giovanna says. Also, I relate to some of these being an immigrant, but here, both parties are Americans, no? I mean, in my case, it can be frustrating sometimes, but I kind of understand why things are the way they are, but for this couple, there's no excuse for discrimination.
Load More Replies...When I was younger I always wished for a greencard. Now I see with fright how things evolved in the US, not only in "racial" concerns (maybe this is as it is since white people fell into this country and stole it from the natives) but also in thoughtfulness, social interaction, human sense and politics, or let's say what Trump has made out of it. Things really have to change. And don't tell me it's none of my business - it effects the entire world.



























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