I think it's safe to say most of us have had our fair share of bad relationships. But when does a bad relationship becomes toxic? The kind that takes a toll on your physical, psychological, spiritual or emotional well-being?

Twitter user Halima has set out to find out just that. Recently, she asked people what 'red flags' they overlooked in their exes and her tweet instantly went viral.

From forcing girlfriends to cut off ties with all of their guy-friends to defending everything but your boyfriend, scroll down to see what to look out for in your next relationship and let us know in the comments if you have something to add to the list.

More info: Twitter

Image credits: imdatfeminist

#1

Toxic-Relationships

catchpole75 Report

Ripley
Community Member
3 months ago

That's pretty much the textbook definition of gaslighting. Sounds like you are well out of it.

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Dr. Lillian Glass, a California-based communication and psychology expert, who says she coined the term 'toxic relationship' in her 1995 book Toxic People, defines it as “any relationship [between people who] don’t support each other, where there’s conflict and one seeks to undermine the other where there’s competition, where there’s disrespect, and a lack of cohesiveness.”

Dr. Kristen Fuller, a California-based family medicine physician specializing in mental health, told TIME that those who regularly undermine or cause harm to their partner often have a reason for their behavior even if it’s subconscious. “Maybe they were in a toxic relationship, either romantically or as a child. Maybe they didn’t have the most supportive, loving upbringing,” Fuller says. “They could have been bullied in school. They could be suffering from an undiagnosed mental health disorder such as depression or anxiety or bipolar disorder, an eating disorder, any form of trauma.”

#2

Toxic-Relationships

ohheyitsmira Report

Billie Davis
Community Member
3 months ago

eww...

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Either way, being in a toxic relationship with these people might even cause health problems similar to those caused by fast food or other toxic environments. "In fact, unhealthy relationships may contribute to a toxic internal environment that can lead to stress, depression, anxiety, and even medical problems," author and psychologist Dr. Sherrie Bourg Carter wrote for Psychology Today.

To back up her claim, Dr. Carter highlighted a long-term study that followed more than 10,000 subjects for an average of 12.2 years. Eventually, it was discovered that subjects in negative relationships were at a greater risk for developing heart problems, including a fatal cardiac event, than counterparts whose close relationships were not negative.

As we can see, positive relationships are vital for a healthy, well-balanced life. "Make sure your health-conscious lifestyle doesn't leave out this crucial ingredient," Dr. Carter concluded.

#3

Toxic-Relationships

c0incid3ntial Report

Lisa loves cats
Community Member
3 months ago

i hope that these people can get the relationships they need and deserve

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#4

Toxic-Relationships

K1SSFROMAROSE Report

Biljana Malesevic
Community Member
3 months ago

This is the worst way of destroying someone. It's invisible to others but it tears you apart.

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#5

Toxic-Relationships

StefaniaVillaTO Report

Iris Engler
Community Member
3 months ago

That's true. In a healthy relationship you should be able to count on your partner whatever happens. That way those kind of feelings should not be able to come up. Yeah of course there can be a phase for whatever reason where you feel kind of that but it should never be a constant thing

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#6

Toxic-Relationships

E_Savage21 Report

Kaisu
Community Member
3 months ago

That's a sure way to damage someone's self-esteem

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#7

Toxic-Relationships

meliveeee Report

Ripley
Community Member
3 months ago

Classic DV behaviour - leaves you with nowhere left to turn.

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#8

Toxic-Relationships

depreciationtap Report

Daria B
Community Member
3 months ago (edited)

This one sounds very embarrassing. It must have gotten you lots of inappropriate and unwanted attention from strangers.

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#9

Toxic-Relationships

Lordacolyte Report

Viviane
Community Member
3 months ago

Sounds like he left, which I highly recommend if he hasn't.

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#10

Toxic-Relationships

the_pohlkat Report

Purplish Hat
Community Member
3 months ago

Oh man, this hurts.... so much love for anyone who has been here

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#11

Toxic-Relationships

kebar40 Report

Kaisu
Community Member
3 months ago

That's why I don't want apologies, they don't do much, I want change. A lot of people apologise because they feel like that's what they should do, but then they continue the same kind of behaviour

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#12

Toxic-Relationships

xxEmmajaynecxx Report

Kaisu
Community Member
3 months ago

Don't blame yourself for hanging around, it's really hard to leave an abusive relationship, especially when it's emotionally and mentally abusive because then it's easy for you to think you're just overreacting or making things up. And people like these control you and manipulate you and threaten you into staying

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#13

Toxic-Relationships

majaguzynska Report

RJ
Community Member
3 months ago

As the inn keeper is, he trusts his guests.

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#14

Toxic-Relationships

Syn__666 Report

Aurora Jackson
Community Member
3 months ago

sounds like mine but im stuck

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#15

Toxic-Relationships

stupidhOeaSs2 Report

Biljana Malesevic
Community Member
3 months ago

So familliar... :(

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#16

Toxic-Relationships

itsalexisjovon Report

Iris Engler
Community Member
3 months ago

Been there. They can manipulate in a way that you really start doubting yourself and start thinking about if you are not maybe really the guilty

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#17

Toxic-Relationships

renae_blaich Report

Tracy Moller
Community Member
3 months ago

This was my relationship

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#18

Toxic-Relationships

theschobes_1 Report

Noemie Houtekie-N'Da
Community Member
3 months ago

How could people be so mean. It is very sad to see these sort of things and realize how unfair people are.

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#19

Toxic-Relationships

AdrenalineRaash Report

Noemie Houtekie-N'Da
Community Member
3 months ago

UHHHHH! How evilly mean!

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#20

Toxic-Relationships

AdrenalineRaash Report

athornedrose
Community Member
3 months ago

this! you should not need a translator to communicate with your partner!

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#21

Toxic-Relationships

soulchologyy Report

Kaisu
Community Member
3 months ago

If someone cheats on you, then it's a clear sign they don't really respect you as a person, and continuing a relationship like that can be extremely challenging, especially when the cheater is also emotionally abusive

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#22

Toxic-Relationships

chlozoiid Report

Blair Doak
Community Member
3 months ago

Same here but my him was a her.

#23

Toxic-Relationships

joeyfb6 Report

L McN
Community Member
3 months ago

Yeah...partners should have each others backs, the only thing worse than realizing that she doesn't have yours is hearing that she did a lot of the attacking.....

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#24

Toxic-Relationships

_ameliaophelia Report

Angel
Community Member
3 months ago

I feel this in my soul!

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#25

Toxic-Relationships

genn_n_juice Report

SaddBoiiwithaheart
Community Member
3 months ago

Wait what was the link for? i can get on it

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#26

Toxic-Relationships

iysnesymone Report

L McN
Community Member
3 months ago

Ouch, and the reverse is true here: I could never cheat for many many reasons, but one of them is sort of funny....The first person I would want to tell about the event would be my best friend. Who I am married too....We talk too much almost, and no matter how mad I am she can still get me talking about random things and enjoying the conversation.

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#27

Toxic-Relationships

idavaxo Report

L McN
Community Member
3 months ago

YES!

#28

Toxic-Relationships

GioFvcks Report

Lauri foss
Community Member
3 months ago

Their words should meet their actions. If not then they are both fake

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#29

Toxic-Relationships

randomunicornnn Report

Iris Engler
Community Member
3 months ago

There is literally no reason to block your partner no matter for how long unless you really clearly finished that relation . Then sometimes this can be the only way to protect yourself

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#30

Toxic-Relationships

camriendm Report

Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
3 months ago

Yikes!!

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