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A Netizen Asked “What Has A Parent Said To You That Made You Go, ‘What The Hell?’” And 30 Delivered
Have you ever caught yourself saying something so weird that it kept you up for the next week or two? Well, parents are not an exception – it’s just that they might not realize what kind of impact it had on their offspring.
So, be it something strangely comical or downright inappropriate, here is a list of 39 of the strangest things that moms and dads of the world have ever said to their children!
More info: Reddit
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
I shaved my head at 21 and kept that hairstyle for the last 28 years.
My dad walked into my room when I was 26 and asked me for a comb!
He looked at me , thought about it for a second and laughed.
Rip dad.I miss you.
RELATED:
#2
After I told my mother that I didn't open up to her or my dad was because I didn't trust them with my emotions, she started screaming that she hated me
Like, girl, this is exactly why I don't tell you things 😂
CouchChihuahua (He/Him) 2 years ago
This is why ur gonna go to the mental asylum, mother, bcs when i move out i have evidence of everything u did and u gonna pay b*tch
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Hill Branda 2 years ago
I have had that same conversation with one of my sisters. I now avoid her at all costs.
StrangeOne 2 years ago
This is exactly how I feel about my folks. I tried opening up to my mom about how I feel she unleashed everything she hated about me throughout my whole life in my ear. I had to hold the phone away so I would not get any traumatic words stuck in my head. I don't know what all she said but I did hear her shouting very angrily. "THEN GO FIND A COUNSELLOR" she would scream. Made a mistake of asking my dad why I'm not considered "close family" to him and his other family, and how I feel like a black sheep through an email. I'm not sure who responded, if him or his cruel wife. But apparently that was a tall order of a question and they made it out that I'm demanding all their attention, and how the past is in the past. I have so many questions and suspicions but I know I'll never get closure.
Trainingfortheballetpotteh🇺🇦 2 years ago
same. i dont like telling my mom things because she will find a way to make it my fault and get mad at me, and one time a few years ago i told her about how i didnt feel comftrable talking to her about these things, she got mad at me and how "i am such a horrible mother" etc. this is why i cant talk to her about these things lol
Lil Miss Hobbit 2 years ago
This is hard one for parents to hear. Thankfully my parents worked through it reasonably and agreed to give me space until I healed. We are good friends now.
#3
"Stop twitching, tapping, moving, bopping, clicking. CAN YOU JUST SIT STILL while I'm trying to watch tv and drink [yet another] glass of wine." Me with a private docs diagnoses for ADHD that my parents didn't tell me about because they were embarrassed of me and couldn't bare for the weird church cult they were part of to find out. They went private docs so it wouldn't be on my medical records. And if I talk to any of the GPs as an adult about possible meds, they just think I'm looking for a high and not actual help. A few years later, I got in bad trouble at school due to my ADHD and sensory problems[where a teacher actually shut me in a cupboard because he couldn't handle me.] and I got permanently expelled from that secondary school for hitting the teacher with piece of sports equipment, after he'd shut me in that dark closet for an hour. After that my parents told me "it is your fault that we have lost faith in god, because we prayed for you to ""get better""". But I didn't, infact this was the start of my other sensory issues and anxiety which as an adult was diagnosed as autism. I was misunderstood, mismedicated, and everything felt wrong but I could not describe or even analyze what exactly was provoking my fight or flight. This story ends at 11yo. I have more stories of my s****y childhood. But I'm not sure anyone will read this far down anyway. But I found writing this all down actually helpful and I feel a weight lifted.
Charles Brewton 2 years ago
Yeah, stay strong and keep learning to grow, as Montanavanna said so aptly. Don't let your happiness be contingent on others' actions and behavior.
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
We read all of your post and we hear you. I’m sorry you didn’t get the love, support, and encouragement you needed growing up. Hope life is better for you now.
Montanavanna 2 years ago
Keep learning and growing my dude. A few things that have helped me.. We are not the things that happen to us. Sometimes our parents can't be, won't be or are unable to be the people we need them to be. That is on them, don't carry their s**t. If we didn't break kids there might not be so many broken adults
The Chronic Insomniac 2 years ago
I'm 56 and just found out I'm autistic. It explains a lot. Like why my life has always been a sh*tshow.
Sara Wilson 2 years ago
That it does OP! And people will read all of it and give u support, but not all. Those ones don't matter anyways, so don't mourn the loss
Never Snarky 2 years ago
I'm so sorry all of this has happened to you. I'm glad you now know the cause. It's sad that you suffer from their abuse.
Trainingfortheballetpotteh🇺🇦 2 years ago
same! its not the same exact story as yours (its not as bad.) but i tend to fidget a lot, and my mom always tells me to stop fidgeting when im near her and how it "distracts her" when its not like i jump around or anything.
#4
The main one that gets the biggest wtf from ppl is when I tell them that during lockdown my mom kept finding my brothers baby clothes (she threw mine away) & kept sending me pics, telling me that she can't wait to be a grandma. I asked if my brother got his gf pregnant, she said she was talking about me, I reminded her I would never give her & my dad grandkids she responded with "don't worry, I'll find someone to r**e you & force you to have the kid"
Vic 2 years ago
The best revenge would be to have kids, and then get a restraining order against the grandma..
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zak 2 years ago
Which is hopefully followed up with "and that's the last time I saw or spoke to my mother"
StrangeOne 2 years ago
I'd block her on all social media, change my number and perhaps move. Along with making sure she's banned from the property at my job.
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Ephemeral Mochi 2 years ago
ummmm excuse me???? that sounds like a threat and possibly could be illegal
Zoey Rayne 2 years ago
That's a quote from someone who should never be around any children ever.
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
What the actual f!!! I could never imagine a mother saying this to her daughter. How disgusting! That would be our last conversation.
#5
"If you're like this now I hate to think what you'll be like on your period."
I was huddled in a chair, running a low grade fever and suffering diarrhea. She was angry with me for trying to stay home from school.
One, it's a field trip day, I don't WANT to stay home but hello, a*s pee.
Two, a period is a natural thing, and there are pads/tampons for that. Diarrhea is NOT natural and I can't exactly shove a cork in my colon.
Spoiler: she made me go to school and I shat myself mid fieldtrip.
ConstantlyJon 2 years ago
no woman should ever, ever be shamed for something they cannot control. my wife is still traumatized by her experiences with this from her previous marriage and I have to remind her every month that she's not gross, she's allowed to have moods and emotions, and she doesn't need to use her period as an excuse to act any certain way. It's infuriating to me that anyone would tell her any differently.
Never Snarky 2 years ago
What a good, understanding husband you are. Bless you.
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Captain McSmoot 2 years ago
It sound like momma may have had some "extracurricular" activities she was doing once everyone was out of the house... (Queue the Barry White music.)
DarkViolet 2 years ago
And the mood lighting, incense, oysters on the half-shell.......
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Doodles1983 2 years ago
I get asspee with my period. And as a result of my ME. 😰 Spoiler, pooped myself at work. (Sh)it happens. C
#6
"I should have aborted you." When her dryer needed cleaning because *she* didn't check dad's pockets of laundry she was doing and a grease pen melted all over it.
"Just look at you...If I looked like you, I'd [unalive] myself." To chubby 5 or 6yo old me. Like, lady, just give me a salad or some s**t.
Szilvia Kiszner 2 years ago
I think this one deserves a full on Jesus f*cking christ.
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Sapient Mulch 2 years ago
This one is pretty sad. My father's line was, "I'm gonna trade you for a dog and shoot the dog". Thanks dad, I'm seven. What do you want from me?
Pamela Blue 2 years ago
I was thinking the same thing. I've never heard a term so stupid in my life. It's kind of like Americans are becoming terrified of the English vocabulary and must change it so it doesn't sound so scary. Pathetic.
Load More Replies... Never Snarky 2 years ago
What is wrong with the words die, dead, kill, etc.? Euphemisms do not change reality.
#7
my mom told me she wishes i'd just [unalive] myself already once she doesn't remember saying it but it's stuck with me as the most f****d up thing she's ever said
Fussy1 2 years ago
I'm 49 and I can remember like it was yesterday my mom saying, "I should have drowned you kids like puppies when you were little". She too suffered from selective amnesia. That's the kinda $hit a kid will always remember.
Never Snarky 2 years ago
My mother once made me pack a suitcase to take me to an orphanage because I was so bad she didn't want me anymore. I was 4 years old. It affected my whole life. I'm 73 and I still can't forgive her.
Pancake_Pansexual_Panda 2 years ago
Well, that is my Asian strict mom. Whenever she says something hurtful to me (she says it daily) and I tell her what she said to me, she always doesn't "remember" it, or so she claims.
Zoey Rayne 2 years ago
I wonder how much these kinds of parents would regret it if their kids took that terrible advice.
Joshua David 2 years ago
Dannnng. She remembers that. It's like anytime a murderer is being interrogated, they always "black out." What an @$$hole.
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
My father called me pond scum when I was 15. We had a major family trauma and upheaval and I was lost and didn’t know how to cope due to their lack I’ of parenting all of my life. I’ll never forget those words. I have a good relationship with him now but I really wish he and my mother has been better parents to us when we were young.
Captain McSmoot 2 years ago
Plot twist: someone [unalived] her mother later on in life, doing the world a favor.
#8
“I wish i never had kids”
Tyranamar Seuss 2 years ago
You don't tell your kids this. But it's OK to voice this to a therapist, partner, or good friend. There are times it may feel like this. Doesn't mean you're a bad parent or that you always feel this way. Parents need to be able to be honest with how they're feeling and get support.
Justacrow 2 years ago
Yup just never burden the kids with it. I have a friend whose mom constantly told her she wished she had aborted her. Messed her up bad, she is nearly 40 and it still hurts. Given my friend's mental health I assume her mom was suffering as well, she needed support, but that doesn't make her comments and additude okay
Load More Replies... zak 2 years ago
There is no benefit to anyone when making a statement such as that. Lots of people feel that way and *don't* tell their kids about it, just like lots of people can see an ugly person and *not* say "I think you're ugly". Have some tact and empathy ffs.
PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago
I was so surprised at real mum opinions when my bff and little sister had kids. I was expecting the usual cliche ‘oh it’s magical etc’ but they’ve been so honest like - ‘don’t have kids’ ‘the little shits make me want to die’ but it’s all emotion, they don’t obviously mean it, and they are great parents with super good relationships with their kids, but hearing real complaints/ wingeing from mums os refreshing from the generic ‘popular opinions’ society prefers to accept from women.
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Clown fish 2 years ago
A lot of people do. They get pushed by parents, religion or just people in general to have children then regret it. And don't people jump on their high horse these people still love their children they just have regrets.
Julie Schulz 2 years ago (edited)
I agree but I'm not sure it's a good idea for parents to actually tell their kids that, especially not when they are younger and more impressionable. That's why I don't have kids. I just know (and have known for years) that I would not enjoy being a parent and would regret it. I have yet to regret not having them.
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Dirk Daring 2 years ago
Got this one from my father when I was ~14. I'm pushing 50, and that one still stings.
Zoey Rayne 2 years ago
This may be said to, say, your therapist, but never within ear short of your children nor anyone who might repeat it to your children.
My “in my head” Voice 2 years ago
My sister used to say this to her only daughter all the time. Now that she's an adult, they're "best friends." Massive dysfunction there.
alloutbikes@yahoo.com 1 year ago
It could mean she wishes you didn't have to go through the life she could provide.
Ąåřţđęşịɠŋȿ 2 years ago
Not THAT honest to their child. It's not the child's fault the parent was never sterilized.
#9
My old boss said that she got jealous when her husband called their 4 year old daughter beautiful, so she called her daughter ugly and told him to stop inflating her ego. She proudly admitted it to all of us as if it was normal and it baffles me to this day
Zoey Rayne 2 years ago (edited)
Sounds like she was projecting insecurities about her own appearance, but that is one of the worst ways I can think of express those feelings.
Rachel Parker 2 years ago
Did she send her off with a woodcutter to get killed in the woods? Cause that kid would be better off with seven dwarfs.
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
I'd start calling her (the boss) ugly. Preferably, while she was within earshot.
Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 2 years ago
So he married and knocked up a brothers grim evil step mom?
#10
My mom told me that women pooped babies out of their butt. I believed this until I was 12 or 13. Boy, I got laughed at when I used this as my answer when asked in sex ed.
Captain McSmoot 2 years ago
Everyone knows a stork brings the baby while everyone's asleep. Idiot.
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
Clearly children are dropped off by giant birds but only to happily married couples, right?
#11
When I told my mom I didn't want to keep contact with my ex-husband as he had been abusive she told me she knew there had been some hitting in the past but that she'd never witnessed it, and he'd always been very nice to her so she'd like to go have coffee with him. Seriously?! WTF.
Joshua David 2 years ago
My mom pulled some $#it like this once. I didn't talk to her for a year.
Glenn Schroeder 2 years ago
I might meet with a son-in-law after he hit my daughter. He would NOT want a second meeting.
Julia French 2 years ago
abusers isolate their victims by cultivating friendships with all the significant people in the victims life so they won't be believe when they turn to them for help.
Almarako94 2 years ago
Time to abandon your mom, never let her meet your kids if you have some.
Lynette Vella 2 years ago
My mom refused to believe it was 'that bad'. Said, "Well, it was better than what I had - at least he painted the house."
#12
If I didn’t go get my dad alcohol he always threatened to ‘ off me ‘.
Once we were at the harbor , I pretended not to hear him so he pushed me , I don’t think he intended to, but I fell in the water between to parked boats.
A man who’s on one of the boats saw this and jumped in to save me ,I was 10 so I wasn’t a strong swimmer yet. My dad just laughed when the man was yelling at him.
Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago
May crabs pinch that horrible dad's nipples and never let go.
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
I am by no means anywhere near being a medical professional, but OP's dad seems to have a severe addiction problem.
#13
I reminded my mom that humans deserve a basic level of respect, and that the fact she considered obedience a form of respect skews her view on how to treat people, and she told me "I don't have to respect you. You're my child." I was an adult at the time.
Pancake_Pansexual_Panda 2 years ago
My mom said that before. She is like: "I gave birth to you, why do I have to be nice to you? You have to respect me!" etc, etc...
- 2 years ago (edited)
Check if you have a legal obligation to help her in her old age. If you do, what's the very least you have to do? Someone joked "Be nice to your kids - they'll be the ones picking a retirement home for you." And then there are folks who cut ties with difficult parents.
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Karma Black 2 years ago
"How DARE you disrespect me! You are SO disgustingly disrespectful! You are my daughter, and I have a right to treat you however the f*** I want to!" -- my mother, when I asked her to speak to me like I'm a human being. I want NC shortly afterwards.
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
My mom was the same way. I do things differently. My daughter is my child but she is not a child, and my respect for her is infinite. I've learned from her quite as much as I've taught her, if not more.
Never Snarky 2 years ago
Ah, yes. My mother told me she could say any nasty thing she wanted to me because I was family. And she did it all the time.
Ąåřţđęşịɠŋȿ 2 years ago
I can not even IMAGINE a parent talking to their child like this. ...but then you look around. You read s**t like this... and all of a sudden it all smacks you in the forehead. This is why the world is becoming a deeper and deeper cesspool every day and why Trump won the presidency. Most people want a leader who has no respect for them. They think they deserve it or something. Luckily most people who are brought up in that environment do leave and never return. But it seems like about 33% don't. Just say'n.
#14
When I was a kid, my best friends mother was an insufferable snob,and looked down on me because my family was lower middle class. When we were about 9 years old, she took my friend and I to the library to checkout some books, and ran into a friend of hers on the way out. She introduced us to the friend. She said very loudly, that "(insert her daughters name here) is a voracious reader and very very smart, but (insert my name here) is NOT!". I was upset and said "YES I AM!" She then looked at me, then her friend, and they rolled their eyes and laughed. That was nearly 50 years ago, and I remember it as if it were yesterday, and honestly, it had a hugely negative effect on my life, it traumatized me. The only consolation for me (I know this makes me a bad person) was that 10 years later, her very wealthy husband left her for a much younger woman and she was forced to live well below her accustomed means, and was bitter the rest of her days.
I should note I am now a very happy person, in a great relationship, running my own successful business.
ginshun 2 years ago
Seems like a mean comment sure, but not something that should traumatize a person for life.
Nichole Harris 2 years ago
Keep in mind that some folks are simply more sensitive or less jaded than others... We also don't know their history, maybe this was the straw that broke the camels back
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#15
Wasn’t my parents but my Grandpa.
“Josh can you take me to see Marge?”
Marge was his long time girlfriend who had Alzheimer’s. My GP was in his 70s at the time and we took away his car because he was a dangerous man behind the wheel to say the least. . “Sure Papa Joe!” That or PJoe was his nickname. Drive him to the place Marge was cared for at. Stop at the front and ask “How long until I come back?” He replied with “Give me an hour. That should be long enough for us to have sex.” I start crying laughing and he leaves with a giant smirk. I could never look at him again without thinking or saying “Almost 80 and still getting after it, WTF”
Blue Bunny of Happiness 2 years ago
Depends on what stage of Alzheimer’s it is. People can have mental capacity for years after diagnosis, the OP doesn’t specify why Marge is being cared for, it may be that she has falls or reduced mobility rather than due to her dementia
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artfar1534 2 years ago
You have to think about the context the lady with Alzheimer's may be early stage or still remembers and consents to the grandpa
Load More Replies... #16
I needed to take my youngest sister with me to my appointment—as I was taking her somewhere later—and afterwards she gleefully told me how beautiful my therapist was.
I thought that was super adorable, and decided to share that sentiment with my mother.
Her response? “Really? I thought she was black.”
🤦🏻♀️ I still haven’t recovered from that response. Like mom, you’re hispanic, you shouldn’t be like this.
Edit: formatting
Charles Brewton 2 years ago
As a white woman, I cringed at OP's post and lmao at Ron Man's comment....
#17
A few months ago I had gone to do a surprise visit my grandparents on my dad’s side. While I was driving up their property I saw them walking in their groceries and witnessed seeing my dad for the first time. I had never met my dad in my life but knew my grandparents.
I walked up greeted my grandmother and she ushered me over go talk to my father. As I went to greet him this dude threw his hood on and jumped in his truck and locked the doors and said no words to me. Never in my life have I witnessed a grown man run away like that.
Vic 2 years ago
Was the dad also holding up a cross and spraying holy water as he ran away?
Load More Replies... Penny Hernandez 2 years ago
I'd move him from the 'dad' category to the 'sperm donor' category.
Ąåřţđęşịɠŋȿ 2 years ago
whoa. mind blown. There be some complicated c**p intertwined in that gentleman's head.
#18
I would often visit the kitchen to watch how my mother cook. One day when my father saw me coming out of the kitchen, he said “you keep visiting kitchen, your d**k and balls are gonna fall off. That’s how girls are made.”
context: I was 7 when he said that to me and we are Korean family
Charles Brewton 2 years ago
So glad you seem to be way more enlightened...I'm sure your current or future SO is too.
#19
Eating all your vegetables son will make the hair grow on your chest and balls. Well WTF if I don’t want hairy balls mom!
Goose of the Ahonkalypse 2 years ago
This was a pretty common sentiment for a couple of decades. Not the balls part but the idea that certain things would put hair on your chest. I'm sure some people believed it but it was more an expression to encourage outmoded ideas of masculinity or cajole your male kid into doing things, in this case eating healthy.
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
My grandpa used to say this to me because I’ma girl and obviously don’t want hair in my chest. He thought it was funny, so did I. Miss him so much!
Load More Replies... Penny Hernandez 2 years ago
I was told the same thing as a child and dutifully ate my vegetables. (I'm a GIRL.) Then one day I realized that girls don't have hairy chests and thinking about all the vegetables I'd eaten, had quite the fit at the dinner table.
LooseSeal's $10 Banana 2 years ago
I think the word she was looking for is puberty. Puberty does those things.
XenoMurph 2 years ago
In all fairness, if you aren;t healthy, puberty doesn't do the things it should. Vegetables help a lot!
Load More Replies... Juliette Deroulede 2 years ago
Lol, that Little House on the Prairie episode where Mr. Edwards makes the girls eat rattlesnake... He's like "It'll put hair on your chest" and Laura's like "I don't think I want hair on my chest."
#20
Where do I even start?! I've written alot about my mom on Reddit. She was a crazy abusive monster when I was a kid. She was controlling and completely unhinged. A few weeks ago we had the following convo- Her " I just can't imagine hurting an animal. I could never forgive myself." Me "really. I must be thinking of my other mom, but my mom [unalived] my first pair of geckos that I saved a years worth of allowance to buy because she didn't want them in the house. My mom also [unalived] my parrot by putting it out side in the winter where it froze to death." Her " I did that? I would never do that." Pretty sure you did, mom.
Captain McSmoot 2 years ago
If I could upvote this a thousand times, I would.
Load More Replies... Hill Branda 2 years ago
Full-on psychopathy. I can't even imagine something doing something like that to a defenseless animal.
Clown fish 2 years ago
I think your mum is ill and needs to see someone if she can't remember doing such things
Vinnie 2 years ago (edited)
Selective memory. I've read that narcissists rearrange reality to conform to their self-image. I encountered something like that once and it was weird: "I would never do that, therefore it wasn't me, it was someone else." I didn't argue, no point, but I sure didn't want to hang around them.
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Lene 2 years ago
It's funny how moms can have selective memory like that. 😏 my mom claims to have no memory of telling me to dress in oversized clothes as a kid so I could hide my big butt. Or how she and other family members calculated my BMI at a family get-together to show me that I was in fact, scientifically fat. I was about 7yo. She has no memory of this. When she said this I told her "it obviously made a bigger impression on me than it did on you".
#21
"You're a weak person. You should go [unalive] yourself." After I opened up to my dad about my depression six months after my mom passed away.
Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago
I wouldn't even say that to someone I hate. And this guy says something like that to his own child?!
Featherking 2 years ago (edited)
Yes. Because emotions means you’re weak. “Think Robocop, son, think Robocop.” Screw off, coward, and get some emotions like a real man. That’s all I have to say to your dad.
Pamela Blue 2 years ago
Anyone suggesting that someone else should kill themselves should be put on a rack and stretched out til they pop. What an awful thing to say to someone.
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
I'd like to believe that this was a result of the Dad's own mental illness and that what sparked such an angry, hateful thing to say was the fact that he was wrestling with suicide himself and was terrified about confronting that emotion.
#22
As a kid I downloaded an app on my Kindle Fire tablet that was supposed to teach me how to play the ukulele. Well I ended up accidentally buying a 1 year subscription for the app that costed around $100 with my parents credit card (still don’t know how this happened as their card wasn’t connected to anything on my tablet). Well my stepdad called the apps customer service and ended up telling them that I had “down syndrome” and that’s why I accidentally bought the subscription. This was all right in front of me btw. The lady on the phone was super nice and probably would’ve given him a refund anyway but like…? Was that really necessary? The best part is, is that my Mom is a SpEd teacher so again…? Why did he think he needed to say that? Idk. I don’t have Down syndrome. Also, another time he told me to get the pizza from the delivery guy on our front doorstep but again, I was really young and got scared so the pizza guy left with our pizza. He called the pizza place and told them I had autism so they’d come back with the pizza. Also had this conversation right in front of me. He thought it was hilarious, like he was “rigging the system”. Still baffles me to this day. Oh also my mom divorced him last year.
Montanavanna 2 years ago
Not as bad but I know most parents will say their kid is sick if they need a day off but are unable to get it. My husband has done it more than once. Or that I am sick so he has to stay home to watch the kids. This excuse has long legs since covid happened.
Clown fish 2 years ago
So he should lie to people that his son has SEN needs in private? Maybe he shouldn't lie about his sons health
Load More Replies... #23
Two things.
1. "[My Aunt] is so stupid! Couldn't even get a full scholarship!" My aunt is going to become a doctor and is extremely good at it. She just couldn't get a scholarship that covered her fully just like so many other people who go to become doctors.
2. "Not to be racist but I think that if people live in America they should be required to speak English." A comment about my aunt's fiancée's family (the same aunt who she called stupid) simply because they didn't speak fluent english.
L.M.Nickey 2 years ago
The United States does NOT have an "official" language. So people that say things like this are just showing their ignorance.
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
People who say things like this generally don't speak English very well themselves.
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Joshua David 2 years ago
It's funny how a good percentage of Americans think they own the English language. Like, you stole this s#it from the UK. Get your own language. I'm American.
#24
Oof. I hadn’t talked to my dad in 15 years. I decided to reach out (for certain reasons and not to restart a relationship). He asked if he could ask me about my life. I let him. I told him, among other things, I was in a wonderful relationship with a terrific gal. “Is this a real relationship or like the girlfriends I had when I was with your mother.”
I was equally glad I disowned him 15 years ago, disappointed a man and a father would speak like that to his estranged son, and angry that he was the father I was born to. He is just one big joke to me.
ConstantlyJon 2 years ago
That's a great way to both insult OP's mom and distance yourself from any responsibility. Way to immediately show your true colors.
Lene 2 years ago
Yeah. I sort of know the feeling. My mom has told me a lot about affairs one one nighters she'd had with other men while she was married to my dad. And she told me as a "haha your dad is so dumb"-story. In reality it was more like "hahayou can't really trust you mom. She's experienced in lying and cheating".
#25
For context, I work with a bunch of children, and I bring them food and drinks and stuff like that as well. When I came down with a bad cold, I stayed home from work, not because I was too tired to go in or anything, but because I obviously didn't want to get like 12 kids and their parents sick. Mum blew up at me, asking why I care about the kids at all, they're not mine after all. Like jeez mum, have some empathy 😅
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
If she can't show empathy towards OP, I'm scared to imagine how she treats her own kids.
Julia Mckinney 2 years ago
When 9/11 happened, I called my mom, as you do when something horrible happens and you just need reassurance. She asked me why was I so upset? It had nothing to do with us here in Washington state. At the time, my husband was in the Navy Reserve and my in-laws were touring Pennsylvania in their RV (the area where Flight 93 crashed? They'd been traveling through it a couple days before). That was my biggest WTF moment for my mom.
Some Random Person 2 years ago
I believe that if anyone comes down with bad cold, they should stay at home, and it it shouldn't matter if you work with kids or adults. During COVID (at least in my country) it was mandatory for someone with any symptoms of flu/cold to notify the employer and stay home.
#26
“You need to stop eating.”
My dad kind of underhandedly waited until he and I were alone away from my mom and brother. He glared pointedly at my belly (admittedly large from weight gain), and said that to me. Not “I’m concerned about your health” or “try to cut back and move more” - just “stop eating.” Stop doing something necessary to live.
I had previously suffered for years from eating disorders and his comment worsened everything. Eight years later, I still actively think about it multiple times every day. My relationship with food and my body is awful; I’ve become a recluse because of my shame over my appearance. Fights over my insecurity have contributed significantly to my crumbling marriage.
The kicker? My dad has been morbidly obese his entire life
Charles Brewton 2 years ago
Yeah, sounds like an insensitive, older generation way of saying cut back. Probably prompted (hopefully) by concern but definitely should've been worded differently. From modern perspectives, parent/child interactions were pretty heinous in the past...
Happy crow dragon (they/any) 2 years ago
This morning my dad was like “skipping a meal wont give u an eating disorder” (in response to my mom freaking out I didn’t eat breakfast) “and either way u can stand to lose weight”
Bgray450 2 years ago
I feel your pain! My overweight father would lecture me after dinner every night (luckily he worked on the road most of the time) about how I was eating too much and when I got older boys wouldn't want to date me. Well guess what? I'm a fat single woman.
Duckie Measles 2 years ago
I also got that same treatment from my mom, dad, grandparents, and brother. Then they wonder why I've never had a serious relationship or why I lack confidence. At least I'm ace so it's not so bad.
Load More Replies... Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago (edited)
So sorry to hear that :< especially considering how much of a hypocrite OP's dad was (he probably wanted OP to stop eating so he would have more food to stuff his own face with).
Glenn Schroeder 2 years ago
I agree it was handled poorly, but I'd like to give the father the benefit of the doubt and assume he said that because he didn't want his child to suffer with being overweight since he knew what it was like, and he didn't know a better way to do it.
#27
“I’m raising my daughter to be a wife” (she’s 4)
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
You’re raising your daughter to disown you the moment she’s old enough I hope
Michael Largey 2 years ago
If you do a good job of raising your daughter to be a women, that will take care of her being a wife (if and when applicable).
Pamela Blue 2 years ago
That's funny. Come back in 15 years and tell me how that worked out. LOL!
Me. 2 years ago
Then there is the post about raising some jid to be a husband and apparently it's a good thing.
Rain Anderson 2 years ago
The good husband post had points that said picking up after themselves, cooking, doing laundry, not throw a temper tantrum etc . There's a huge difference between doing Ur own chores and being society's 'good wife' .
Load More Replies... #28
"[Temnyj] is your mothers favourite."
Said directly to both my younger brother and sister.
Made even worse by the fact that everybody knew my sister was *his* favourite. So. An extra f**k you to my brother, i guess.
There were a lot of pretty s****y nuggets from him, but that one always stuck with me as an exceptionally unnecessary comment that serves no purpose other than f*****g up your kids self worth.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Right before she died, my mom had each of her five children come into her hospital room separately for a last talk. She told each of us, "Don't tell the others, but you were my favorite!" She knew darn well that we'd compare notes after the funeral, and this was her last prank on us. She left the world laughing.
#29
"You were a mistake, and I had planned to abort you." Yeah... that happened...
Phoenix(or nix)they/them 2 years ago
I got the "you're just like your (absentee sporadic child support payments)dad". That was in December. I remember it word for word. I hate hearing it because my sperm donor is a pos who should have never had children.
Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago
That's horrible. I can't imagine a more hurtful thing a parent could say to their child.
Scotira 2 years ago
Even if she contemplated to abort, THAT is NOT something you tell your kid! You take that to your grave. I one time asked my mom, if I had been an accidental pregnancy (I was already well in my 30s and it would not have been a big deal to me) bc she and my bio father divorced when I was 2 month old... suffice to say she was angry that I even thought that 😅 I never said anything about that topic again, though I still think I might not exactly have been planned 😇😅
JK 2 years ago
My kids are all aware that almost all of them were accidents (same dad before any snarky comments are made), but that has always been followed up with the sentence "...but you were all wanted", because accidents do happen and do you know what - things that happen by accident are not all bad, lots of good things come from accidents, including my kids
#30
When I was about 28 my mom broke the news to me and my siblings that our dad had passed away, and oh ya you have a half brother who is in his 40s. Has a wife and children…still in shock and I’m in my mid 30s now. My dad bailed on us when we were toddlers.
Pancake_Pansexual_Panda 2 years ago
If that ever happened to me, I would never be the same again, and I would be sad too.
Helena 2 years ago
This happened to me. Hadn't seen my dad since I was a toddler. Step dad sat us down to tell us bio dad was dead. Learned in the obit I had a half sister.
Load More Replies... #31
"Your mom was a prostitute and I might not be your dad." I was age eleven when I was given this piece of information.
PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago (edited)
I went to school with a girl with that backstory. We are still friends and she lives a good life and runs a beauty parlour in Melbourne. He was a good dad
#32
They only wanted my twin..
Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago
It's bad enough to think something like that about your kids, but they felt the need to say it out loud too? Unbelievable.
#33
Once my mom talked about how my dad was a good father despite him having a bad upbringing with his dad. She was basically using it as an excuse for him while she was talking to extended family.
Me and my dad always had a complicated relationship. I was scared of him as a kid and we don't talk very much now. At one point as a kid the story goes he tried to burn me with a lighter and it was a whole thing, but I guess we all moved on. I couldn't really believe it when I heard it.
Montanavanna 2 years ago
Your doing parenting wrong if you think having your kids fear you is the way to raise.
Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago
If you're a good parent, your kids will only fear hurting your feelings or letting you down (without you having unrealistic expectations to begin with of course). I never understood why there are parents out there that would rather be feared than loved.
#34
Called my dad asking how to set up a retirement fund, he said “retirement is for the birds, work until you’re dead” *click*
Blue Bunny of Happiness 2 years ago
Well, that seems to be the attitude of the government at least…
Penny Hernandez 2 years ago
And the attitude of the vast majority of employers, too.
Load More Replies... Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago
I pity anyone who has that kind of mentality about their life.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
If I was still teaching, I would be just as happy as I am now. Happy in a different way, but just as happy.
Load More Replies... #35
A lot of things
1. My retina detached. My mom asked why I need a surgery to fix it.
2. When she could still my bank account, she got mad and asked me why I was spending $30+/week at gas stations. Um. Gas. What else would I get from a gas station every week?
3. Refuses to get a physical/annual exam/mammograms/bloodwork or anything that's recommended for her age. Tries to claim I'm the unhealthy one who doesn't take care of my health.
4. She tried to forge her friend's signature for a document that needs go be notarized and acted surprised when the court wouldn't accept it
#36
*knocks on the shed door*
If you boys are gonna smoke grass, at least do it inside. Besides, you look like wierdos sneakin' out here.
#37
Dad wasn’t around as a child. Meet dad when I am 7 years of age. Dad makes no attempt to connect. I had a hard time calling him dad cause he was a stranger. After doing the every other weekend thing, it became more of a chore to have to see him. When I’m about 11 years of age he told me “ you know you don’t have to come here if you don’t want to”. Even as an 11 year old, I was baffled that a father would say that to his child. That was probably the first “what the f**k” I said in my head.
Haven’t seen or spoke to him since that day. 15 years and still going strong.
Montanavanna 2 years ago
He might like to think he was being considerate but nope. He wanted out of the responsibility of actually rearing his child.
Load More Replies...
Alyssa Phillips 2 years ago
Eh. I can see both sides. I don't force my kids to be around anyone they don't want to be. Family included.
Almarako94 2 years ago
My guess would be that he's full of his own troubles and didn't want to involve you into that.
#38
When I called my mother to find out a good time of year to visit her she said, "What for?"
Zoey Rayne 2 years ago
Tone and context is important here. Did she want to know more about the time and intent/activities of the visit or was she asking "Why would I want to see you?" Big difference.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
My mom would have asked a question like this. Not that we weren't welcome - she just wanted to know everything, and she wanted to know it now.
#39
My father once told me that between my brother and I, I was his favorite. This caught me off guard because I thought parents weren’t supposed to have favorites.
Alyssa Phillips 2 years ago
Unpopular opinion...I have situational favorites. If I want to sit and cuddle, watch a movie and pig out, I call my youngest. If I want to go to a show or concert or something cultural, my middle. And anything outdoors is my oldest. I dread having to switch it up because they can be insufferable. I'll do it ... But I won't be happy about it on the inside.
Hill Branda 2 years ago
I knew I was my Mom's favorite. My other two sisters treated my Mom like a slave. The older sister was physically and verbally abusive and the middle sister looked down on all us. But Mom and I became best buddies, for which I am very grateful.
sturmwesen 2 years ago
Well, I can't tell who the favourit is/was, but I can tell you who isn't/wasn't.
Almarako94 2 years ago
My father said it a lot while my brother was there, not to make me feel better but to make him feel bad.
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What do you think ?
Nelson 2 years ago
Long ago I did two tours (20 months) in VN and 5 months on German Czech border. My family moved during my second VN tour and unbeknownst to me, threw away all my clothes, memorabilia, and car. Got out of army and went to parents’ new home expecting to have some basis for restarting life. There was nothing, not even a T-shirt. Their excuse was that they didn’t have room. However, their new home was in SoCal and they had room for snow blowers, and other c**p. It almost destroyed me as in my 3 yr army term, I spent 25 months deployed, was wounded twice, and had significant PTSD. I had absolutely nothing and was betrayed by my ultra-patriotic a@@hat parents.
Brainmas 2 years ago
My parent told me she wouldn't be surprised if I got pregnant by 16. I was 15 and a virgin, and I'm pretty sure this was just one of the usual lectures on how I didn't do my chores right or my grades not being good enough.
- 2 years ago
Where did she get that weird correlation between pregnancy and not getting an A on a math test? Her thinking makes sense only if she flunked sex ed and thought that making the bed the next morning was a form of contraception.
Load More Replies... Nichole Harris 2 years ago
My momma once threw a hand full of candy at me and told me to eat it and go die, it was my Halloween candy and I asked if I could take some to school. I was 5
Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
I've never in my life said anything to my children to make them think for a single second I wouldn't do anything in my power to protect them above all else. Kill for, die for and go to war with God over them in the blink of an eye. How someone can be the worse thing that ever happened to their own child and not even admit or care about it is sickening!!!!
majandess 2 years ago
Yes. This stuff is horrifying to me. I totally love my son; he's one of the best things to ever happen in my life. I wouldn't ever say or do these sorts of things to him.
Load More Replies...
Sam J 2 years ago
My mom used to threaten to slit her wrists to me when I was FOUR if I overwhelmed her (she was a single mom, but my grandma and great grandma lived in the house and helped care for me). She'd go over to the kitchen cabinets and grab a butter knife to hold to her wrists. I know now that it's not likely to unalive you but at the time I was terrified. It happened a few times too. I'm realizing now just how f**ked up that was.
Rostit. . 2 years ago
Holy c**p. I mean my parents were far from perfect but they were angels compared to these folks. I remember when I realized my parents were just like me but older. they were not perfect but they love me and did their best. The spanking backfired though. that gave me some complexes that I didn't even realize until I was in my 40s.
ThisIsMe 2 years ago
I've posted in a MIL thread before, but applies here too: At my mother's memorial service, my MIL came up to "console" me and told me she could be my mother now. These two women saw each other at my wedding and once again at Christmas, after which my folks decided it was best to just avoid my in-laws. I have never been close to, or frankly even liked, my MIL. She was a terrible mother to her kids, and I will never forget her trying to replace my mom that day.
Ephemeral Mochi 2 years ago (edited)
(my mom talking about me on the phone with someone) "She's got the biggest boobs I've ever seen!"
Montanavanna 2 years ago
My mom, while tipsy, said something that I had to inform her was hella ignorant. It went a little something like this. "You know I don't have a problem with gay people but, I am tired of seeing two men kiss on TV". How would any of you responded?
Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
"I'm tired of seeing old people making fools of themselves" and walk away
Load More Replies...
bElLa sTairZz 2 years ago
my dad used to s**t talk my mum, which violated the court order, my step mum pointed it out once. all in front of me and my step sister
Nelson 2 years ago
Long ago I did two tours (20 months) in VN and 5 months on German Czech border. My family moved during my second VN tour and unbeknownst to me, threw away all my clothes, memorabilia, and car. Got out of army and went to parents’ new home expecting to have some basis for restarting life. There was nothing, not even a T-shirt. Their excuse was that they didn’t have room. However, their new home was in SoCal and they had room for snow blowers, and other c**p. It almost destroyed me as in my 3 yr army term, I spent 25 months deployed, was wounded twice, and had significant PTSD. I had absolutely nothing and was betrayed by my ultra-patriotic a@@hat parents.
Brainmas 2 years ago
My parent told me she wouldn't be surprised if I got pregnant by 16. I was 15 and a virgin, and I'm pretty sure this was just one of the usual lectures on how I didn't do my chores right or my grades not being good enough.
- 2 years ago
Where did she get that weird correlation between pregnancy and not getting an A on a math test? Her thinking makes sense only if she flunked sex ed and thought that making the bed the next morning was a form of contraception.
Load More Replies... Nichole Harris 2 years ago
My momma once threw a hand full of candy at me and told me to eat it and go die, it was my Halloween candy and I asked if I could take some to school. I was 5
Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
I've never in my life said anything to my children to make them think for a single second I wouldn't do anything in my power to protect them above all else. Kill for, die for and go to war with God over them in the blink of an eye. How someone can be the worse thing that ever happened to their own child and not even admit or care about it is sickening!!!!
majandess 2 years ago
Yes. This stuff is horrifying to me. I totally love my son; he's one of the best things to ever happen in my life. I wouldn't ever say or do these sorts of things to him.
Load More Replies... Sam J 2 years ago
My mom used to threaten to slit her wrists to me when I was FOUR if I overwhelmed her (she was a single mom, but my grandma and great grandma lived in the house and helped care for me). She'd go over to the kitchen cabinets and grab a butter knife to hold to her wrists. I know now that it's not likely to unalive you but at the time I was terrified. It happened a few times too. I'm realizing now just how f**ked up that was.
Rostit. . 2 years ago
Holy c**p. I mean my parents were far from perfect but they were angels compared to these folks. I remember when I realized my parents were just like me but older. they were not perfect but they love me and did their best. The spanking backfired though. that gave me some complexes that I didn't even realize until I was in my 40s.
ThisIsMe 2 years ago
I've posted in a MIL thread before, but applies here too: At my mother's memorial service, my MIL came up to "console" me and told me she could be my mother now. These two women saw each other at my wedding and once again at Christmas, after which my folks decided it was best to just avoid my in-laws. I have never been close to, or frankly even liked, my MIL. She was a terrible mother to her kids, and I will never forget her trying to replace my mom that day.
Ephemeral Mochi 2 years ago (edited)
(my mom talking about me on the phone with someone) "She's got the biggest boobs I've ever seen!"
Montanavanna 2 years ago
My mom, while tipsy, said something that I had to inform her was hella ignorant. It went a little something like this. "You know I don't have a problem with gay people but, I am tired of seeing two men kiss on TV". How would any of you responded?
Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
"I'm tired of seeing old people making fools of themselves" and walk away
Load More Replies... bElLa sTairZz 2 years ago
my dad used to s**t talk my mum, which violated the court order, my step mum pointed it out once. all in front of me and my step sister
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