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30 Times Guys Failed To Notice The Most Obvious Signals From Girls And Had Only Themselves To Blame
Interview
Correct me if I’m wrong, but the language of love is never straightforward. In fact, we often tend to communicate much more subtly; through hints, messages, gestures, and references, hoping that our love interest or significant other would actually get it.
But sometimes, much more often than we think, it’s not how it works. Call it miscommunication, but romantic messages do not always reach their addressee which results in some pretty hilarious stories to tell.
So this time, we’re taking a look at some of these missed opportunities and how reality won over intention. Have a good laugh! After you're done, be sure to check out our previous post with more obvious hints from girls that guys did not notice.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
In high school I walked into a classroom and a very attractive girl that was an acquaintance at most came up to me and said "djw, did you know that Rodrigo and I broke up?"
I said, "oh, sorry to hear that," and went on my way.
Then I spent the rest of the day and night thinking about that. Why the hell would SHE tell me that? Why they hell would she tell ME that? Why was she smiling when she told me that?
The next time I saw her, I asked her what she was doing that weekend and she said, "nothing, do you want to go to a movie?" And that was the moment that I realized what was happening. And I wound up getting a date out of it.
And eventually, a family.
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
i had a girl tell me that too, but i've been friends with her for years beforehand, she never seemed interested (i mean she had a BF), when i talked to her on chat she would always take forever to answer, like she was busy with something else or someone else, the only hint she ever gave me was saying "you are the first one i told that we broke up", and her timing was terrible, i was still in a different country, excited to come home. Later she asked some other guy out and the a year later got married. I can't say i regret not catching on.
Lady of the Mountains 4 years ago
whoa....WHOA. a guy told me that once! i could never figure out why....
Suzanne Clark 4 years ago
Guys can be so clueless--I had to take the soft top off of my now husband's MG Midget, leaving a note with pretty broad clues as to where it could be found, before he got up the nerve to ask me out. that was 53 years ago.
Janet Graham 3 years ago
The female often takes control in the relationship. The trick is making him think that he did it all.
RELATED:
#2
"Hey, there's room in my tent if you want to join me"
"Thanks, but I brought my own tent!"
And that's the story of why my friends think I'm socially retarded
Mark Melton 4 years ago
Sounds like teenage me. Jeez, I was so clueless socially. Still not very good at it.
Amy Force 2 months ago (edited)
lmao reminds me of that episode of Everybody Loves Raymond, when Ray went over to Debra's to fix her futon (it wasn't really broken, but she needed a reason to get him over there since he was the delivery guy), and she said to Ray: "Hey, I think I made to much food here, you want some?" And he said: "Yeah, Ok... Wrap it up, I'll eat it in the truck." bwahahaa! and after staring at him like an idiot for a moment she said, "You can eat it HERE."
#3
A girl once burned me a mix CD of almost nothing but love songs. My guy friends and I held a small conference where we listened to the CD in full and tried to see if there was some hidden message there. We came up with a solid maybe. There were 6 of us debating this.
Brendan 4 years ago
Tracklist: 1. I Want to Hold Your Hand 2. Kissing you 3. Be Mine 4. Let's Get it on. "What is she trying to say?"
BlackPearltheSeaWing/NightWing 4 years ago
They couldn't even decrypt it with six men though!
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Troux 4 years ago (edited)
High school. Went to play pool with my sister and her friend who recently ended fling #2,456. Apparently my sister and I were supposed to pay attention to the 5 or 6 songs she played on the jukebox over the course of 2 hours, which were all breakup songs. She was sad, and we shouldn't have been having so much fun. Seriously, I hate the musical messages game. I just listen and enjoy, not try to decipher deeper meanings and motivations.
Rickie Cole 4 years ago
so you got a mix CD of love songs from a girl, listened to it with friends and had a mass debate
Love is a tricky game. No wonder there are volumes upon volumes of books, TV shows, podcasts, and even courses created to help us navigate its rocky terrain. Sometimes it pays off, but often our romantic hopes get shattered and time is the only power that’s able to heal that wound.
So in order to find out how to really determine whether your romantic interest is into you, we spoke with James Preece, a leading Dating Expert in the UK who has helped 1000s of single people. No wonder people often describe him as the UK’s version of Hitch.
#4
Me posting on Facebook: “anyone wanna go hiking this weekend?”
Cute girl: “I’ll go.”
After a long hike and dinner, I still didn’t know I was on a date until I was dropping her off. Seriously thought we were just hiking. We’re married now.
Andy Acceber 4 years ago
It's okay. My second date with my wife was a booty call. At least, I thought she booty called me. She hadn't. She had given up on us. I had misunderstood. Well, all's well that ends well.
Daniel Atkins 4 years ago
Wonder when he realized he was married when they left a church and the rice was flying?
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
I was on my third date with now-hubby before I realized we were.... dating... thirty-two years later....stillllll going on dates :-)
a_smol_berry 4 years ago
Wait, what?!? Go on a hike with someone from Facebook? Did they know each other? So many red flags!
#5
A girl literally confessed her feelings directly to me and I didn't hear it cause I zoned out looking at a squirrel
BlackPearltheSeaWing/NightWing 4 years ago (edited)
I feel bad for the girl but this is really funny
#6
Picture this: teenage me in bed with my girlfriend, sans clothes and doing some heavy petting. I had a condom in my wallet, like a sauve motherf*cker. She asked to see it. I told her “I only want to take it out of the package if I’m going to use it.” She replied “Okay, take it out.” Me: “Nah, I only want to take it out if I’m going to use it.” Her: “Let’s take it out.” Me: “No, don’t want to waste it.” Her: “...” Fast forward 15 years to me sitting thinking while in the dentists chair and being like “Holy f*ck, I’m a moron...”
Andy Acceber 4 years ago
Ouch, and all this poor girl heard was that you'd consider sex with her a waste. Absolute communication failure. Lol. Live and learn.
Duncan Rogers 4 years ago
My God these guys are dense. I can only ache, deeply ache, for them.
Mark Kelly 3 years ago
She should have asked but when when she saw you didn't get the hint maybe she didn't want to have sex with someone that dim. Ha
wifeofweasley 4 years ago
Ok she could have just said she want's to have sex with him. It's not that hard
So first off, we wanted to figure out what you should do if your romantic interest is not getting your subtle hints, no matter what you do. “If you've tried being subtle and it didn't get noticed, then it's time to change tact,” the dating expert said. “It's worth noting that they might already be aware of your interest, but they aren't sure how to react. If they aren't keen, then they will pretend they've not noticed to avoid embarrassment.”
#7
Her: Do you have a girlfriend?
Me: No...no one would date me anyway.
Her: I’d date you.
Me: Thanks, but you don’t need to pity me.
Her: I would date you
Me: Thanks but...
Her: Are you free on Saturday?
Me: Surprised Pikachu face
And we’re going on two years in October
Vicky Z 4 years ago (edited)
She understood he wasn't going to get the hint ever!😅😅
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#8
Early interaction with my boyfriend-
Me: "That suit looks great on you. It would look better on the floor."
Him: "That would wrinkle the suit."
Panda Kicki 4 years ago
I had to be superliminal with my (now) hubby. Like litteraly "Hey, I like you and want to be with you". Worked fine, married almost two decades.
Carmen Sandiego 4 years ago
I think so too. Then again, I'm not the person you should come to for flirting advice, I'm pretty oblivious myself.
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Mark Kelly 3 years ago
Maybe you should have said that suit would look great folded up neatly in a bag in the closet
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
totally something my friend would say, he is so clueless sometimes, how he has a wife and i don't i'll never know.
#9
Watching TV in my living room at roughly 2am, in the dark
Her: applying strawberry lip gloss.
Me: why are you putting on lip gloss?
Her: strawberry lip gloss tastes so nice.
Me: haha youre weird
Her: want to taste?
Me: nah I already know what it tastes like
Commence several years of late night self loathing and regret
Vic 4 years ago (edited)
I am also the kind of dumbass that would take the gloss and put it on my lips to taste it.. 🙈🙈 it good that there is sufficient for me to understand..
Bender Bending Rodríguez 4 years ago
I'd go wash my hands, come back, rub little lip gloss on my finger, lick my finger to taste, go back to wash hands and come back with a detailed report on if taste was on point or not.
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Tsvetomira Videnova 4 years ago (edited)
This reminds me of an episode of "Two and a half men". A girl seductively asked Jake if he wanted to taste her lipstick (on her lips) and he touched her lips with his finger and really tasted it. :-D
Having said that, James explained that “if they like you then they need it spelled out clearly just in case they've got it wrong.” What he suggests is “rather than an over-the-top romantic gesture, just ask them if they'd like to go out on a date one evening.” James assured us that it doesn't need to be more complicated than that and they might be curious about just one meeting.
#10
I was living with my then-boyfriend a few years ago. Feeling a little flirtatious, I suggested we could take a shower together, you know, to save water, wink wink.
His response? "Why? We don't pay for water."
Shut. Down.
Nugua Nugua 4 years ago (edited)
Honestly, there are enough men they work on. I just keep trying until I find them ;)
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Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
The lady in the picture is wearing mascara and lipstick into the shower lol
Mark Kelly 4 years ago
Even if you don’t pay for something you should still try to conserve it in general.
#11
In high school, a girl invited me to her house after school, and brought me up to her room. Once we were there, she excused herself to go change in the bathroom. She was in there about 10 minutes. Then her mom came home and immediately started yelling at her for having a boy over, and I had to leave. She (the daughter) walked me outside and said, "I'm not sure why you didn't try anything when I was naked in the bathroom..." So she thought that was a huge hint. Meanwhile, I'm thinking, "She seemed 100% into me and it seemed like we were about to hook up, but why the [hell] would I barge into the bathroom to watch her change? Maybe that's what she wanted, but with someone else, I could have ended up labeled as a sexual predator." There was another time that I was alone at a beach at night with a girl in my class, and she suggested that we go skinny dipping. When we were both naked and dripping wet, I tried to make a move, and she shut me down immediately saying that she didn't mean to send me signals. Anyway, my advice for people is not to take/give hints. Be mature and talk about it.
Nugua Nugua 4 years ago (edited)
The first one is just really strange. This has nothing to do with women or men, it's just a really bad “hint“.
Steph Harrison 4 years ago
exactly, situations like that could go so wrong if someone misunderstands them. Spontaneity can be attractive, but should always involve some prior communication.
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Devil's Advocate 4 years ago
The first one is weird and could have ended up with mom walking in with two naked teens, or just screams if you walked in... The second one did seem like a hint, but I guess she just wanted to go skinny dipping, but wanted company...or just didn't like what she saw.
Stephen Branley 4 years ago
I hate this. How's he supposed to know that her being in the bathroom is a hint? What if he does try something and it's *not* a hint? Then he starts showing up in a Bored Panda "Girls, what's the creepiest thing a guy has done?" thread instead.
Mark Kelly 4 years ago
So she expects men to just randomly walk in the bathrooms that they know a girl is in.
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
the first one is just stupid, she was suggesting predatory and creepy behavior and the 2nd, well maybe she didn't like what she saw, (or was, again, stupid) but at least you saw her naked.
Luka Verheijen 4 years ago
Everyone always says that women don't act lile that first one and you shouldn't try that kind of stuff. If you're an exeption, be clear about it
WhatEvenIsLife 4 years ago
If someone were in the bathroom for 10 minutes, I'd figure they were having a bowel movement and 10/10 not barge in there thinking it might've been some kind of hint.
#12
Girl kisses me in the dark in her bedroom at her birthday party. "You should leave before we do something stupid," she whispers. I nod and leave.
Andy Acceber 4 years ago
Don't worry. That was sweet. You proved you understand consent and hopefully she learned about your need for clearer communication. Lol.
ThatOneWriter 4 years ago
I mean I respect this guy. She set a boundary and he respected it. 🤷🏻♀️
Wood Carver 4 years ago
100% this is correct. Both sexes are still working to overcome the problematic consent that is paired with society expecting female virtue. This led to her needing to signal consent subconsciously while vocalizing non consent. Go back and watch... well literally anything starring Harrison Ford or Sean Connery. This is how we taught women and men to communicate consent for years. Saying no but meaning yes. So many miscommunications and more importantly so many sexual assaults rapes and murders to cover those actions up would have been avoided. Teach your boys and girls to communicate their expectations and boundaries clearly and then back them like a line back if they ever say anyone has overstepped. Whether that be grandma demanding a hug or a man who heard no and did something anyway. Teach them all that when they hear no it only ever means no. Teach them that people who don't take a no are always in the wrong. Teach them that it's ok to have different expectations for a situation.
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Casey McAlister 4 years ago
Well, technically you did everything right. She said you should leave, and you left.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago (edited)
She said "you should leave", then he left. Logical. It is called "not being a rapist".
However, at some point, it may become evident that unfortunately, your interest is not romantically interested in you. James said that if you've tried a few different techniques, then it's probably a good idea to accept it's not going to work. “This can often be because you've already established a friendship or working relationship. Once you get categorized then it's very difficult to get them to change that.”
#13
Can I say one I was oblivious to?
I was out of town, chatting to a girl at a bar. We figured out I was 13 inches taller than her. She said, "That's funny, I'm going on a date with a guy who is 13 inches taller than me tomorrow. And I'll probably f*ck him after."
My response? "Well, that's a weird coincidence!"
I didn't figure it out until I was on a plane home.
René Studer 4 years ago (edited)
I think I wouldn’t have gotten that either. I probably would have zoned out a little after „I‘m going on a date with a guy who...“
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
that was all on her, she started with basically saying "i'm not single" that instantly shattered any hopes he might have had and probably killed the mood, it didn't matter what she said after. Also if she was slutty enough to say "i'll f*ck him after" she could have come out with a better way of asking for a date.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
Oh, it looks like a vertical Homer ! I get it, now !
Load More Replies... Luka Verheijen 4 years ago
To be fair, it's kind of a bad line. Just like somethimg like "you look like my future girlfriend"
Fikri Fikri 4 years ago
so what was the 'proper' response there, "wanna go for a test ride?" ?? lol
#14
She learned to say I love you in my parents native language. And I still missed the hint.
Wood Carver 4 years ago (edited)
I think the one thing that comes across from my perspective on so many of these is that it's about self worth. What I hear is her saying that and my heart, especially when I was younger would have said "Don't over think this idiot there's no way someone so interesting and beautiful could possibly be interested in you and if you play this wrong you'll lose someone you really care about." Sometimes it takes a baseball bat of love, but also of patience and a willingness to accept that there's a real problem with toxic masculinity that prevents particularly young men from seeking out help for their self worth even within their social group. Remember that scene in every movie and book where a teenage boy tells all his friends that he is in love with a girl but he's worried because he doesn't feel like he is good enough to deserve her? No. Member the one in every book/movie where he suffers in silence and hates himself. Peter Parker says yes you do lol so does the hulk and iron man and doctor strange and so does well you're getting my point
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#15
I was living overseas in a place where it was difficult to find CDs (this was pre-streaming). A girl I knew had started chatted to me on Facebook. I thought nothing much of it, figured she was out of my league, it was nice to chat. But, you know, I chatted to lots of people.
A few weeks into this chatting, I get a package in the mail. In it is Radiohead's "In Rainbows", with a note that says, "Hope you enjoy. My favorite track is 8. x"
I message her, I say thanks and that I really dug track 5.
"What about track 8?"
"Oh, yeah, it's okay."
"I really think you should listen to track 8 again."
Track 8 was "House of Cards", which opens: "I don't want to be your friend / I just want to be your lover / No matter how it ends / No matter how it starts"
Still kicking myself.
Duncan Rogers 4 years ago
Reading these is killing me. I wanna slap each of these guys upside the head. :-) Fortunately most of them seem to have learned to pay more attention.
Shine Caramia 4 years ago
Track 8 song is NOT a love song. Track 5 is. Another line in House of Cards is "Throw your keys in the bowl / Kiss your husband goodnight."
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
but why do girls stop after just one of their hints failed ? do they just assume they were rejected? or do they stop because you failed their intelligence test ?
Mark Kelly 4 years ago
What shitty country are you in? Here in Canada we have access to all kinds of technology
Moreover, “if they are constantly talking about the dates they are going on or asking your opinion on partners then that's a clear sign you aren't their target,” the dating expert said and added that in this case, it’s best to “just carry on enjoying their company the way it is and look to date other people instead.”
#16
When I was drunkenly flirting with a girl (I never flirt and I'm horrible with girls in general so didn't think I was getting anywhere) and asked her where the bathroom was. She said 'I'll show you' then came in with me and asked what I wanted to do.
Awfully confused I says 'well I want to have a piss, you'll have to leave'.
She said 'oh' and left
Took me about 6 months before I figured that one out
Janet Graham 3 years ago
That would not be the way to start a relationship. It would just be a blind quickie and that ain't right.
#17
Via text
Girl: Are you going to that party?
Me: Yeah for a little bit. Probably gonna be boring.
Girl: Yeah...was thinking of just staying in.
Me: Probably a good plan.
Girl: So yeah...I'll just be here tonight. Roommates are gone.
Me: Sounds nice; my roommates never leave.
Girl: Ok. So. I'll be here all alone in my apartment. If the party sucks.
Me: Very good.
Tiny Dynamine 4 years ago
The thing is with these kinds of conversations, we think that if we invited ourselves over we'd get told we were a creep or that she totally didn't mean it like that. My advice: just get to the point and stop fannying around. :D
Diane Aguilar 4 years ago
You could simply ask them if they're ok with being alone, you know. If they genuinely just want to have a night in all by themselves they'll say, "Oh no, I'm good, you go enjoy the party," or something along those lines. If they're awful and not worth keeping around they'll throw around the, "Um, I have a boyfriend," line. If they're interested in you they'll be all, "Oh, I would love it if someone kept me company," at which point you could invite yourself to come over. Source: am a woman who wouldn't be brave enough to "just get to the point".
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Joe Palffy 4 years ago
would it have been that hard for her to say "why don't you come over?" or did she think she was being rejected?
Lillukka79 3 years ago
This. "I'm alone if you want to come over" isn't that hard.
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Lyone Fein 4 years ago
So, I can see how she really needed to ask if he wanted to come over and watch a movie, or something.
#18
A girl literally asked me to help her change. We were alone in her house. I respectfully declined for her privacy.
Janet Graham 3 years ago
The niceness matters and will be remembered. You are playing hard to get and it's cute.
When it comes to dating in general, James confirmed that the pandemic has really changed the way people are dating. “They've been forced to slow things down, which is actually a great thing. They've had a great chance to reflect on what they do and don't want.”
The dating coach also said that he firmly believes that people are now much more serious about finding a long-term partner and they aren't willing to settle anymore. “So they are less likely to be messing around on dating apps and more likely to look to meet people in the real world,” James concluded.
#19
She invited me to go swimming with her in college, but before we went to the pool, we'd need to stop at her room so I could tell her which bikini looked the best on her. My stupid ass said, "I'm sure they all look great, just pick one and meet me at the pool."
RANDALL COLLINS 4 years ago
And Johnnie what is our contestant's parting gift? A SWIFT KICK IN THE ASS!
Mark Kelly 3 years ago
I would have gone with her but I probably would have done it to be polite.
#20
She asked if I was interested in dating. Thought she meant in general and said no because I didn't really have an interest in dating anyone but her.
She got pretty distant after that. Didn't realize she was talking about the two of us dating until later.
Grumble O'Pug 4 years ago (edited)
Yeah, the “thick as a plank, disembark to your left” sign went on in her head
April Stephens 4 years ago
Since Ryan Deschanel is confused, I will try to rephrase this. The girl realized the guy was stupid. "A warning sign saying 'he's as stupid as wood, get away from him now' went off in her head."
Load More Replies... Joe Palffy 4 years ago
" didn't really have an interest in dating anyone but her." and that isn't dating ? i thought things this stupid only happened in movies/anime.
Adrian Ceroni 4 years ago
I feel like something to the story is missing. He said he was interested in dating her. Why didn't she say she was available?
Xandra 4 years ago
Oh come on dude, you can't just miss every single one of these obvious hints, so what's up? Are you kidding around? Or conducting a study of some kind...?
Load More Replies... #21
A few years ago I was working at my elementary school's annual spring fling. That day I volunteered to be the school mascot(a big-ass bear costume) for the morning shift. It was a boring job of feeling like a pedophile the whole time because little kids would hug you constantly and be all over you. They were at just the perfect height for every kid's face to be just in your crotch. It was nearing noon and my shift was soon to be over when a girl my age, 17, stole the bear head right from my own head and ran away with it. I wasn't gonna pay for a damn bear head if she didn't return it, so I ran after her and followed her into an empty classroom with the lights off and the shudders shut tightly. She said something like "oh looky here, mr papa bear, I'm holding your head, I'm a bad girl" I was pissed she took it and wasn't thinking so I, being oblivious to her remark, took the head yelled "THE CHILDREN NEED ME" and stormed out.
Shayda 4 years ago
I knooooowww!! That needs to be in a movie somewhere lol XD
Load More Replies... Mark Kelly 4 years ago
So she was going to do sexual acts in a classroom where kids could walk in?
Mark Kelly 3 years ago
Okay so she was going to make you miss work and whisk getting fired to do her what the hell?
#22
She invited me in "for coffee" after a date. I don't drink coffee, and it was 11pm. I politely declined and went home. Had no clue coffee meant sex.
Daria Z 4 years ago
it was the opposite for me once. I was 100% sure it was an invitation for sex but when I came he had cake and tea ready on the table, and his parents were at home lol
Vicky Z 4 years ago
I would be fine with the cake to be honest!! Just the parents part would be annoying
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Enea 4 years ago
Same here. Went out with this sweet guy for cocktails, flirted with him all evening. He walked me home, and when I asked him up for coffee... declined. When I asked him later what that was about, he said God knows what could have happened. I really can't think of anything sexier than that kind of respect. We've been married for 10 years now and have 3 kids together.
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
i got that too, but she had a BF and i had nowhere to chain my bike, i'm pretty sure she was the oblivious one. Would love to see a collection of unintentional hints, like the skinny dipping one above.
Janet Graham 3 years ago
And maybe she meant coffee! I like a nice cup of decaf in the evenings as a wind-down. Now, if she had asked if you wanted to see her etchings, that would be different.
#23
One time I was texting my bf and told him that I bought a vibrator for the nights he was away at work or something rather. his exact response was, "oh cool, what colour?" I sent him a pic of it and he replied with "can you put it up your butt too?". I sent him a text replying, "come over and find out" and he replied two minutes later, "nevermind, I just Googled it"
Andy Acceber 4 years ago
Um, darling, I'm afraid that's a "he's just not that into you" moment. (At least at that exact moment.) There's no chance he didn't understand that.
LivingTheDream 4 years ago
wrong.... In my more "Nerd" moments, I will take something literally. It's not that I'm not interested. I'm just laser focused on the scientific answer and misinterpret something like "come over and find out" as "come over and look it up here"
Load More Replies... Gogubaci 4 years ago
in this particular context, I would have been half way over to hers after "come"
Luka Verheijen 4 years ago
For the most part, I get the misunderstanding, but that last part...
#24
Girl smiled at me while I was at work at my store, I smiled back. Considered asking her out cause she was really f*ckin pretty. On break, I bought some pizza rolls and hoped she would be in my line. Low and behold, she is in the 14 or less line. We exchange some more smiles, and my heart was goin nuts cause I was gonna actually ask, but the back of my head kept thinking "she's too good, she's just smiling out of respect". So I didn't. She gets to the register and asks to use her rewards account. The cashier asks her name and she gives it. Nothing comes up, so he asks her for her number. She gives it very slowly and on the last four digits, turns around and looks me dead in the eyes. The guy says there's no account and she doesn't even acknowledge it, just pays and leaves. I get into the break room, and it hits me that she may have been trying to hint something. [Screw] me.
None of your business 4 years ago
she was trying to give them her number.
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#25
In 8th grade there was this blonde girl about as tall as I was. Everyday she asked for a hug from Me and I thought it was like how girls hug eachother in a friend way and that she didnt exactly see me as masculine. Her friend told me on the last day that the girl really liked me the whole time and I just let out a loud "Ohhhhhhhhhhh" in the quiet classroom. I feel a little dumb now but now their conversation in the background made way more sense
Devil's Advocate 4 years ago
But if you assumed she liked you when she was just being friendly, you'd have been a creep. Guys need clear signals, especially nowadays!
Robert T 4 years ago
Preferably in neon letters with a signed consent form underneath!
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Shine Caramia 4 years ago
You probably would have been my favorite friend if you were cool with daily hugs and didn't push it.
Raven DeathShade 4 years ago
I love it when I can give people hugs and they're cool with it :).
Load More Replies... Janet Graham 3 years ago
Yeah, girls are taught to have the guy make the first move. But if she makes the first move, he makes the rest. She should have gone all in and hugged you right.
Luka Verheijen 4 years ago
If only there was a world where people could just hug without any creely connections
#26
Her: " do you have a girlfriend" me: "no" (just typing this hurts me she was super cute) her: "lol really that's so suprising, I don't have a boyfriend" me: "lol"
Janet Graham 3 years ago
The correct response is, 'Would you like to?' If she says yes, ask her out.
Luka Verheijen 4 years ago
After the first question, I would respond with "Do I look like I have a girlfriend?"
#27
This was probably in 8th grade. A girl got off at my bus stop and asked if she could see my house. So I showed her around the house, and we ended up in my room. She asked if I knew any good games.
So I loaded Age of Empires 2 on my computer and showed her how to play. She left shortly thereafter.
Apparently that wasn't the kind of game she wanted to play
Robin Childers 4 years ago
In 8th grade, you didn't need to be playing those other kind of games anyway.
Luka Verheijen 4 years ago
Pffff... Games could mean anything, especially with prepubescent boys
Luka Verheijen 4 years ago
That came out wrong, I meant they are not in the age yet to think about that
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#28
Like 2 years ago I was staying at my aunts house because my parents were away. My cousin had some friends over. They were in the pool and I was watching TV inside. One of the girls came upstairs and said “I’m going to get changed, can you come with me?” I politely said no and she walked away. Five minutes later I think about what just happened and thought “wait.... Sh*t”
RANDALL COLLINS 4 years ago
YOU NEVER REGRET BEING TURNED DOWN, BUT YOU ALWAYS! REGRET NOT TRYING.
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
i would have asked 'why' or at least wondered it and then went with her.
#29
I’ve had multiple women ask me why I didn’t make a move (once it’s too late of course) and I still don’t know what hints I’ve missed
Steve Barnett 4 years ago
Same here: Being aspergic means people need to be explicit, if you imply anything to me, I will not get it, ever.
Sylvanticx 4 years ago
i don't have aspergers or anything but i'm like that too. i will not understand your sarcasm. i do however pick up on people's emotinos real well
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LivingTheDream 4 years ago (edited)
Exactly. Just had a date a month ago, date number two, where I drove her two hours to her home in Millbrae, then drove to Capitola for the day to walk around and lunch, then back to her place and chatted for hours. When I was leaving around 9 or so to head back to Sacramento, I gave her a quick kiss goodbye which turned into a bit more passionate kissing. She asked why I didn't do that sooner. I was dumbfounded. We had a great day but at no time did I get a "Let's get physical" vibe. I guess nowadays it's better to err on the side of caution but I wonder how many signals and opportunities I have missed. Probable why I'm still single
Roxy Eastland 4 years ago
If they fancied you they could have asked you out, don't beat yourself up.
Joe Palffy 4 years ago
i'm pretty convinced some women think it's a clear hint simply because she is still talking to you, this teaches guys the wrong thing and they end up unintentionally harassing other women.
M Calad 4 years ago
I am a woman in the spectrum and I have issues to get hints. I do get that something isn't quite normal, but after overthinking some solid hours on it I usually conclude "nah, he may have meant something else". Months later: "I was hitting hard on you and you just... were not into me". Ah...oh...
Tara Raay 4 years ago
Dude…. Do you not have a job or a life? You’re literally commenting on every post and most of them are down voted..
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#30
On her birthday she asked for me to have lunch with her at a restaurant, i said yes, when i got to the restaurant it was only me and her, and 16 years old me tought
" so this is a lunch with only us two in a restaurant at her birthday... yeah nothing weird going on"
then a few months later she says she likes me and i'm like "what the hell, where did that came from???"
Also after the whole thing happened i reviwed the hole year in my head one day and just went "sh*t i am dumb as a brick" like everyday this girl flirted with me and i just tought it was a normal thing, i am so dumb.
EDIT: Also after that lunch she insisted in going to my house, after a lot of trying she got me to say
"Yeah ok we can go"
When we arrived she asked to see my bedroom, and so i showed her, she then saw my guitar and asked to play a song for her to what i replied
"what no stop being weird"
Steph Harrison 4 years ago
After all of the stories you see of women having to police how friendly they are to people because it gets misunderstood as flirting, these kinds of stories are really refreshing.
Shurod Daniels 3 years ago
Unless I get hit over the head by the girl, I don't pick up on SH*T!!! Lmao!!!
#31
one of my friends straight up told me she would say yes if i asked her out and my dumbass thought she was jokingly flirting and thought nothing of it, until a few months later when it hit me
Robert T 4 years ago
Ha just said much the same in another post WITHOUT reading this first. I think this one counts as a signed consent form as well!
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#32
When I Was in the 8th grade 3 girls approached me in a secluded area of the school when I was on my way to the locker room for Gym class. They approached me one of them told me "this girl thinks you're cute. Would you go out with her" Me, having serious self esteem issues from 2 earlier rejections (and everyone within earshot laughing their asses off as I walked away in 6th... and 7th grade humiliation) said to the nice girls "No.. you don't want to go out with me. You just want me to say yes so you can laugh and run off.." They insisted "No, we are serious." girl who liked me "Honestly, I think you are cute and would love to go out with you" "No.. I'm sorry, you're lying" and left. They had the most WTF look in their faces..
TL;DR: Always get back up, never give in to rejection in life.. You might always wonder with regret.
Devil's Advocate 4 years ago
This wasn't so much missing the obvious hint as outright rejecting it.
Chucky Cheezburger 4 years ago
But the rejection seems to have been more defensive since there had been 2 prior times that the guy was teased and laughed at.
Load More Replies... Cherry Lane 4 years ago
Actually, quite sad. But trauma makes people protect themselves from future hurt.
Chloe *Leah* Pheonix 4 years ago
I would do the same nobody has ever had a crush on me since 3rd grade, I already have a girlfriend (and everyone knows it) so why would they even ask anyways
A B C 4 years ago
What the f**k is wrong with you? Are you deliberately trying to downtalk other people because you yourself aren't asked out? If you're always like this, I can totally see why. You're being an absolute douchebag here.
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#33
Several were painfully obvious, to everyone but me. In fact, it took my wife pointing them out many years later (she asked about any prior experiences with women that seemed unusually strained right before they ended) - and I still have a hard time seeing them as obvious hints.
According to my wife, these are among the more obvious:
A girl I didn’t know stopped me in a hallway and asked if I would go out with her.
A classmate walked by, gave me a smile, and ran her hand through my hair.
I was asked to the senior prom by two different girls - at two different schools.
A woman I was friends with leaned out of her dorm window and, smiling and nodding, said: “You’re hot.” I thought she was joking.
For any women who might read this: I hope it’s encouraging that some guys are totally oblivious
Andy Acceber 4 years ago
For any guys reading also. The obliviousness doesn't just happen in straight relationships. Anyone can be oblivious.
#34
She sat on her bed and showed me she could put both feet behind her head. I responded with “wow, that’s cool.”
Andy Acceber 4 years ago
Eh, that wasn't necessarily an invite, unless she was also stripping or asking you to make out or something. I think you made the right move there.
over it already 4 years ago
Yeah, my (very much non-precocious) 12 yr old does this.
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#35
Standing with a girl I liked in the dark on the bank of a river on a summer night. We're just listening to the sounds of the water moving over the rocks. Her: "Why are we just standing here?" Me: "I don't know. Maybe we should go find the others." Yeah. Not a moment I'm proud of.
Tamra Stiffler 4 years ago
Reading all of these makes me wonder why we can't just try simple honesty more often. "I really enjoy being with you. Would you like to go to dinner sometime?".
Jon Steensen 4 years ago (edited)
Because most people are afraid of looking like fools when the feelings are not returned. When you say something that is open for interpretation, you kind of have the option of choosing what to say after you heard the reply. If your proposal is accepted you can say that you were flirting, if you get rejected you can claim that you meant it in an innocent way. The flipside of this is that you put the burden of deciding what is being said on the recieving part and hence they can end op looking like an idiot if they misinterpretate what you said and think you are flirting while you are not. Hence some guys chose to play it safe when hearing something that can be understood in more than one way out of fear. Putting the risk on the one being flirted with and not on the one flirting is a jerk move though, and that kind of game-playing should be stopped in my opinion, as it can lead to a lot of dense guys not getting the message and good relationships not evolving as a consiquence or worse, stalkers being made when learning that No somtimes mean Yes.
Load More Replies... Joe Palffy 4 years ago
it's missing too many details, she really could just have been bored, but the fact that she was with you alone in the first place could be a hint.
#36
"I cleaned my room for you" she literally said that and I did not pick it up, like what the [hell] man, how could you miss that
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
Because men do not link a clean room to having sex. Not your fault.
#37
A friend of mine: *Waiting in line for an interview, talking to a girl* Girl: Hey if we can't get in, we should go grab a beer My friend: A beer?!? At 9 am? You're crazy! Security Guard: Sir, you can go through Friend: Well good luck getting through! He later realized his mistake about five days later
What do you think ?
More Thinking Needed 4 years ago
In a world where there is such a fine line between flirting and sexual assault, it's always best to err on the side of caution.
Tiny Dynamine 4 years ago
Totally right. I'm at a point in life where I think it's just best to make it crystal clear. I've had a rejection recently from someone who seemed to be interested but said she didn't mean it like that. At least I know for sure now.
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Steve Barnett 4 years ago
At the end of a gig a woman asked if I'd like to have breakfast with her. What at 11pm at night? D'oh.
Troux 4 years ago
My immediate reaction would be to excitedly go home and try to get an early rest so I can be ready to meet for breakfast tomorrow.
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Yoga Kitty 4 years ago
I would say most of these people did perfectly fine and reasonable! If you think you are mature enough to flirt, have a relationship or just sex, you should also be mature enough to speak about it. Don't expect anybody to pick up your obscure hints! On the other hand, do not act on anything that might or might not have been a hint - ask for clarification before it gets you in trouble or causes some kind of drama.
Yoga Kitty 4 years ago
On an additional note - for heaven's sake, forget about all this "20 sure signs she is into you" nonsense! It is a very unpleasant situation if somebody assumes you had been flirting with them when, in fact, you just tried to make polite conversation. "But you touched your hair all the time, this means you think I'm hot!" No, it means I have psoriasis and my scalp itches like helI...?
Load More Replies... AnnaBanana 4 years ago
This article is proof positive that the majority of men are sweet, kind and respectful. I hate reading all this "toxic masculinity" bullshit these days that constantly puts men down and probably makes them feel terrible about themselves, when I know that the majority of guys that I've met in my life have been as sweet and wonderfully clueless as the men in this article. I loved reading it!
Chloe *Leah* Pheonix 4 years ago
Most of these guys are just trying to be polite, and so I agree
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ToGo 4 years ago
I'm actually very happy to read that a lot of these happened because the guy was being respectful. Sex isn't something we should "hint" about when you don't know each other that well yet. People confuse being flirtatious with being polite all of the time and just imagine how bad it can turn out if misinterpreted. Better just to alluringly say exactly what you mean - for everyone's sake.
April Stephens 4 years ago
I totally agree with this and would give it a hundred upvotes. The interesting thing is, we don't know whether these women and girls were hinting at sex! For example, the girls might have wanted their first kiss. The ones giving mix tapes might have wanted to be asked out on a short date to a coffee shop. Etc.
Load More Replies... anarkzie 4 years ago
Questions to any gay people out there, is this stuff easier for you guys or do you run into the exact same problems? I feel communication between the sexes is the issue here but I could be majorly wrong.
Shine Caramia 4 years ago
I was donating blood (fem, because the Red Cross is still f****d up about homosexuality), and one of the volunteers pointed out a pin on her lanyard. She said, "It's for Pride," and I said that it was cool. I'm constantly covered in rainbows, so I suspect she was inviting flirtation.
Load More Replies... Kai Scadden 4 years ago
When my crush told me she had broken up with her girlfriend I said "I would date you" like seven times before she realized I was being serious.wearing her hoodie right now on my way to our school (we are in eight grade)
Vicky Z 4 years ago
And now i wonder how many hints I've missed in my life and didn't even realised them later! At least these people found out eventually!!
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
I actually sat down and figured out the missed hints. And turned red. And my husband laughed his a** off.
Load More Replies...
More Thinking Needed 4 years ago
In a world where there is such a fine line between flirting and sexual assault, it's always best to err on the side of caution.
Tiny Dynamine 4 years ago
Totally right. I'm at a point in life where I think it's just best to make it crystal clear. I've had a rejection recently from someone who seemed to be interested but said she didn't mean it like that. At least I know for sure now.
Load More Replies... Steve Barnett 4 years ago
At the end of a gig a woman asked if I'd like to have breakfast with her. What at 11pm at night? D'oh.
Troux 4 years ago
My immediate reaction would be to excitedly go home and try to get an early rest so I can be ready to meet for breakfast tomorrow.
Load More Replies... Yoga Kitty 4 years ago
I would say most of these people did perfectly fine and reasonable! If you think you are mature enough to flirt, have a relationship or just sex, you should also be mature enough to speak about it. Don't expect anybody to pick up your obscure hints! On the other hand, do not act on anything that might or might not have been a hint - ask for clarification before it gets you in trouble or causes some kind of drama.
Yoga Kitty 4 years ago
On an additional note - for heaven's sake, forget about all this "20 sure signs she is into you" nonsense! It is a very unpleasant situation if somebody assumes you had been flirting with them when, in fact, you just tried to make polite conversation. "But you touched your hair all the time, this means you think I'm hot!" No, it means I have psoriasis and my scalp itches like helI...?
Load More Replies... AnnaBanana 4 years ago
This article is proof positive that the majority of men are sweet, kind and respectful. I hate reading all this "toxic masculinity" bullshit these days that constantly puts men down and probably makes them feel terrible about themselves, when I know that the majority of guys that I've met in my life have been as sweet and wonderfully clueless as the men in this article. I loved reading it!
Chloe *Leah* Pheonix 4 years ago
Most of these guys are just trying to be polite, and so I agree
Load More Replies... ToGo 4 years ago
I'm actually very happy to read that a lot of these happened because the guy was being respectful. Sex isn't something we should "hint" about when you don't know each other that well yet. People confuse being flirtatious with being polite all of the time and just imagine how bad it can turn out if misinterpreted. Better just to alluringly say exactly what you mean - for everyone's sake.
April Stephens 4 years ago
I totally agree with this and would give it a hundred upvotes. The interesting thing is, we don't know whether these women and girls were hinting at sex! For example, the girls might have wanted their first kiss. The ones giving mix tapes might have wanted to be asked out on a short date to a coffee shop. Etc.
Load More Replies... anarkzie 4 years ago
Questions to any gay people out there, is this stuff easier for you guys or do you run into the exact same problems? I feel communication between the sexes is the issue here but I could be majorly wrong.
Shine Caramia 4 years ago
I was donating blood (fem, because the Red Cross is still f****d up about homosexuality), and one of the volunteers pointed out a pin on her lanyard. She said, "It's for Pride," and I said that it was cool. I'm constantly covered in rainbows, so I suspect she was inviting flirtation.
Load More Replies... Kai Scadden 4 years ago
When my crush told me she had broken up with her girlfriend I said "I would date you" like seven times before she realized I was being serious.wearing her hoodie right now on my way to our school (we are in eight grade)
Vicky Z 4 years ago
And now i wonder how many hints I've missed in my life and didn't even realised them later! At least these people found out eventually!!
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
I actually sat down and figured out the missed hints. And turned red. And my husband laughed his a** off.
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