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Woman Dumps BF That She Supported For Over A Year While He Had No Job For Lack Of Self-Awareness
Woman Dumps BF That She Supported For Over A Year While He Had No Job For Lack Of Self-Awareness
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Woman Dumps BF That She Supported For Over A Year While He Had No Job For Lack Of Self-Awareness

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“Mo Money, Mo Problems,” rapped the Notorious B.I.G. once upon a time, and his words still ring true decades later. One recent survey found that a quarter of all couples consider money to be their biggest relationship issue, while another revealed that a third of Gen Z and millennials polled had broken up over finances.

When one guy lost his job just three months into a new relationship, he was lucky enough to have his girlfriend support him for the next year and a half. She stood by his side and helped him dig his way back up. Now that the guy’s finally found a job, he suspects his girlfriend is only after his money. And when she recently asked him if she could borrow a few bucks for a hair appointment, he refused. After some introspection and a massive fight, he’s wondering if he was maybe a little too selfish.

RELATED:

    It’s not unusual for couples to argue about money, especially during a period of financial hardship

    Woman and man in heated discussion, highlighting relationship challenges due to his lack of self-awareness.

    Image credits: Getty Images/Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    One couple stuck it out when the boyfriend lost his job, but the trouble really began once he was back on his feet

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    Text discussing a woman's support for her unemployed boyfriend lacking self-awareness.

    Text about woman supporting unemployed boyfriend, now concerned about money motives.

    Screenshot of a text exchange about a weekend argument over money for a haircut.

    Text message expressing feeling crushed after being asked for money; discusses self-awareness.

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    Text message detailing a woman's support for her boyfriend, who lacked self-awareness during unemployment.

    Text about paying for car payment and insurance while saving up for a personal car.

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    A woman getting a haircut in a salon, showing transformation and self-awareness with a stylist cutting her blonde hair.

    Image credits: Jayson Hinrichsen/Unsplash (not the actual photo)

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    Text reveals a relationship issue about lack of self-awareness, discussing guilt and control over expenses and personal choices.

    Text expressing feelings about relying on a partner financially during unemployment.

    Text message from boyfriend mentioning breakup after three days of silence.

    Image credits: Such_Management_4619

    Survey finds that “Millennials fight with their partners about money more than anything else”

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    When more than 1,000 people took part in a survey, around a third of Gen Z and millennial respondents revealed they had previously ended a relationship over finances, while a third of those polled said they would break up with their partner if they did not share the same money values as them.

    The study found that the biggest red flag for the Gen Z generation is when someone is unwilling to split expenses and expects them to pay for everything. But for millennials, it’s reckless spending. Other “icks” include hiding accounts, having a lot of debt, being financially dependent on family or friends, and being “controlling” when it comes to finances.

    “Money can represent both power and security in relationships, making it a challenging, but necessary, issue for couples to navigate. Financial boundaries should be respected in relationships, and continually overstepping this line is the sign of an issue,” cautioned relationship psychologist and dating expert Zoe Coetzee.

    Couple arguing on a gray couch in a modern living room, expressing lack of self-awareness issues.

    Image credits: Getty Images/Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    Most young couples admitted to not talking about finances until they reached a major milestone in their relationship, like moving in together or getting engaged or married. “This lack of communication has led many to reconsider their relationships and, in some cases, end them altogether,” noted Credit Karma, when releasing the results of the poll.

    While they’re reluctant to have finance discussions early on, many young people did admit to researching a new partner’s job to gauge how much money they make. 35% of Gen Z and 25% of millennials said they do this before getting deeply involved.

    Experts advise couples to talk about finances openly and honestly, as early as possible. “Betrayal from financial mismanagement can be traumatizing and have a similar effect on a relationship as infidelity,” warned relationship specialist Jen Elmquist. “Recovering often requires the support of a couples therapist and a financial planner to make sure that, going forward, there is some accountability.”

    Finances came out as a major bone of contention for Gen Z and millennial couples. More than half of them said they fight about money in their romantic relationships. And over 40% argue about cash on a monthly basis. According to the survey, for millennial couples, money is the biggest source of arguments in their relationships, above not being present, being on a smartphone, spending time together, chores and intimacy.

    “You’re a user”: netizens didn’t mince their words when weighing in on the issue

    Text message criticizing a man for being unsupportive and financially dependent on his girlfriend.

    Text discussion highlighting a woman's decision to leave her boyfriend due to his lack of self-awareness.

    Text screenshot of user comments discussing a woman's decision to leave her unemployed boyfriend.

    Text criticizing a man for lack of self-awareness in a relationship where the woman supported him financially.

    Reddit comment criticizing lack of self-awareness in financial support within a relationship.

    Text discussing a woman leaving her boyfriend due to a lack of self-awareness after supporting him financially.

    Text conversation about a woman's decision to leave a jobless boyfriend due to lack of self-awareness.

    Comment criticizing lack of job and self-awareness, advising women to prioritize themselves over unemployed partners.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment criticizing a boyfriend's lack of self-awareness after a breakup.

    Reddit comment criticizing a boyfriend lacking self-awareness, supported financially by his girlfriend.

    Text from online comment detailing a relationship issue about lack of self-awareness.

    Text criticizing a partner for being ungrateful while unemployed.

    Comment criticizing someone's self-awareness in a relationship discussion.

    Comment criticizing a boyfriend for lack of self-awareness after being supported while jobless.

    Reddit comment criticizing lack of self-awareness and scorekeeping in a relationship.

    Text criticizing a partner's lack of self-awareness and financial dependence.

    Comment criticizing a man for lacking self-awareness after his girlfriend supported him while he was unemployed.

    Comment criticizing lack of self-awareness in a relationship where woman supported unemployed boyfriend for over a year.

    Text discussing a woman's financial support to an unemployed boyfriend and his lack of self-awareness.

    Reddit comment criticizing men's lack of self-awareness and discussing relationship dynamics.

    A Reddit comment criticizing lack of self-awareness in a financial support situation.

    Text comment expressing satisfaction about a woman ending support for a jobless boyfriend.

    Comment addressing lack of self-awareness in a relationship, emphasizing financial security in partnerships.

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

    What do you think ?
    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's been a kept man for 18months (after being together for three measly months) and he's calling her a gold-digger for asking to borrow money because she's in debt because of him - um...who's the gold digger...

    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "She paid everything for me for a year and a half and let me use her car, which I am STILL borrowing even though I have a job now." In the next breath: "She only wants me for my money now that SHE doesn't have a job!" ....sigh XD EDIT: holy sheezis! I went back to check their ages and THIS MAN IS 38 YEARS OLD. I thought he was like 22. He's ALMOST 40. He's even sh!ttier than I originally thought!

    Load More Replies...
    Traveling Lady Railfan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I'm broke, got no job, no house, no assets, but I'm afraid to date cuz women will just want me for my money." (Not the exact situation here but that's what it reminds me of)

    Sergio Bicerra
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sadly, my brother was like this, he met a girl online and then she told him she got a son, then he told me she may be after his money and wanting a dad for her son. I reminded him that he has NO job, NO finished studies, NO savings and NOT even a bank account, so pleas do her and many more a favor and just uninstall Tinder.

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    Deborah B
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You have her car. You owe her money. She supported you while you were unemployed. You are "slowly" paying her back the debt she incurred on your behalf. She asks you for money one time to avoid losing a deposit due to a cash flow problem. Rather than recognising that the reason she has a problem is because you've maxed out her creditcards and overdraft, and drained her savings so she has no buffer anymore, you call her a golddigger, and get self-righteous about her wanting a haircut. Glad to see she dumped you. Hope she takes you to court and gets everything she loaned you back.

    Cronecast AtTheRisingMoon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And he couldn’t just do it to be kind to her. Just…wow. He also still owes her money but still had the gall to judge the expenditure. She saved his butt and he couldn’t just say, “ of course, I love you and want to help make your life better too!” She’s made a lucky escape and hopefully learned a lesson about types to avoid.

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    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's been a kept man for 18months (after being together for three measly months) and he's calling her a gold-digger for asking to borrow money because she's in debt because of him - um...who's the gold digger...

    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "She paid everything for me for a year and a half and let me use her car, which I am STILL borrowing even though I have a job now." In the next breath: "She only wants me for my money now that SHE doesn't have a job!" ....sigh XD EDIT: holy sheezis! I went back to check their ages and THIS MAN IS 38 YEARS OLD. I thought he was like 22. He's ALMOST 40. He's even sh!ttier than I originally thought!

    Load More Replies...
    Traveling Lady Railfan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I'm broke, got no job, no house, no assets, but I'm afraid to date cuz women will just want me for my money." (Not the exact situation here but that's what it reminds me of)

    Sergio Bicerra
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sadly, my brother was like this, he met a girl online and then she told him she got a son, then he told me she may be after his money and wanting a dad for her son. I reminded him that he has NO job, NO finished studies, NO savings and NOT even a bank account, so pleas do her and many more a favor and just uninstall Tinder.

    Load More Replies...
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    Deborah B
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You have her car. You owe her money. She supported you while you were unemployed. You are "slowly" paying her back the debt she incurred on your behalf. She asks you for money one time to avoid losing a deposit due to a cash flow problem. Rather than recognising that the reason she has a problem is because you've maxed out her creditcards and overdraft, and drained her savings so she has no buffer anymore, you call her a golddigger, and get self-righteous about her wanting a haircut. Glad to see she dumped you. Hope she takes you to court and gets everything she loaned you back.

    Cronecast AtTheRisingMoon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And he couldn’t just do it to be kind to her. Just…wow. He also still owes her money but still had the gall to judge the expenditure. She saved his butt and he couldn’t just say, “ of course, I love you and want to help make your life better too!” She’s made a lucky escape and hopefully learned a lesson about types to avoid.

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