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“My Heart Sank”: 73 First Visits To A Guy’s Place That Turned Into Total Dealbreakers
Dinner dates and casual drinks offer a controlled environment where bad habits are easy to hide. But when the venue shifts to a home setting, the space gives a much deeper peek into who a person really is.
The other day, a post asked women on Reddit to share the worst things they’ve found at a guy’s apartment. The responses and the speed at which the thread went viral show just how common — and alarming — these unexpected discoveries can be.
One woman recalled visiting a man’s apartment for the first time, after months of dating him, and finding trash covering every inch of the floor. She even found a used tampon lying in plain sight.
Another woman found fist-sized holes punched through the drywall at her date’s place.
Some of these stories prove that while a messy room can be cleaned easily, deep red flags stamped into the walls are much harder to fix.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Lived in his animal hoarder mother’s absolute hole of a basement. Cat feces, vomit, and hair over every surface. Untrained unneutered dogs marking everything. Partially decayed mice everywhere. He’d grown up with it and had given up a long time ago since no one else was doing anything about it, and 8+ free roaming animals plus more in enclosures is a lot to try and battle back.
Only discovered all of that later; the first time I was there I just asked if I could use the bathroom when I arrived to pick him up on the way to a show we were going to. Walked me inside like a man on his way to the electric chair. The ferret reek hit me like a brick wall and I hard 180’d and decided to hold it til we got where we were going. Really heartbreaking.
That was three years ago and I have since extracted him and the cat that’s his baby to my place where they are both doing *so* much better.
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#2
A confederate flag above the bed.
I’m black.
#3
I once dated a guy for a few months before visiting his place. He was a very attractive guy, making 6 figures in a professional job. He wore suits to work, and our on our dates. When I walked inside his house for the first time, it was a literal mess, with trash and debris littered all over the floors. My eyes caught focus near something on the floor near the bed...and it was a used tampon. Not my tampon. Not his tampon. How long had it been there? Who did it belong to? These are questions. His house was gross but that random tampon was the cherry on top for me.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 13 hours ago
You know you've been on Bored Panda too long when you instantly recognize the lady in the stock photo.
When you walk into someone’s home, you see a lot more than just their furniture. The way a person cleans and arranges their space can actually give big clues about who they really are.
According to psychologist Sam Gosling, the “minutiae of our private spaces hold the secrets of our true personality.”
His study found that our personal environments leave behind a physical trail of our habits, emotional stability, and self-care.
#5
I had a girl weirded out that my place was clean and tidy, I had candles and plants and didn't use the 3 in 1 shower gel, she thought I was secretly gay.
#6
Only one bed that he shared with his male roommate who I guess was about 50 years old (we were 19). He had brought me to his place to make out. The roommate was there.
Made up an excuse to gtho, walked to the next corner and took off running.
Basic cleanliness is one of the most telling signs of daily habits and self-care.
Research consistently shows that a high degree of conscientiousness around personal and domestic hygiene is a strong indicator of long-term health, career success, and overall well-being.
This does not mean that having a temporarily messy room after a busy week makes you inherently dirty.
However, when there’s complete absence of basic sanitation, like a sink overflowing with moldy dishes or a toilet that has never seen a brush, it’s more of a warning sign.
“That’s actually one of the reasons why people’s living spaces are so informative. It's because they essentially are the crystallization of many, many acts over weeks and weeks, months and years. It's the accumulation of those books and the way they're organized and the various other knick-knacks you have, and those sorts of things,” says Gosling.
#7
A black toilet. As in the toilet was originally white, but lack of cleaning turned the inside of the bowl black. And no hand soap in the bathroom on top of that.
#8
I'm a gay dude, but, once I went to a dude's house I was just getting to know, and he had a literal shrine for someone. I thought it was a deceased family member, but when I asked who it was, they said "Oh, that's my ex boyfriend, he moved out 2 years ago, I just can't get over him". I was flabbergasted, I promptly left and never spoke to the guy again because I was so freaked out.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 12 hours ago
I mean, I have a little shrine/butsudan in my room for my cat Wintressia and my dog Ember, but they're both deceased XD When you make something like that for a human being who is still alive, we call that ... "time for a restraining order" XD
#9
I went to a guys house one time after seeing each other for a few months. Things were going along great, house was nice. I go inside, no issues. We had a great dinner, I was planning on spending the night… I used the last of the toilet paper and went to look in the cabinet above the toilet for a new roll.
I opened up the upper cabinet and my heart sank. I saw a tape recorder. It was running when I opened the cabinet. I stopped the recording and deleted (I think) what was on it. I put it back and closed the cabinet.
I told the guy I felt off and had to go home. I blocked him, filed a police report and don’t know if anything ever came of it. I still think about it a lot, I told my sister and she thought I should go to the police, but I deleted the recording?
LakotaWolf (she/her) 12 hours ago
Depending on where OP lives, it might be entirely legal for a person to record in their own home, depending on what they're going to be doing with the recording. In some locations you do not need the consent of others to record within your own home. That is, however, skeevy as hell, especially since it was in the bathroom. Did the guy want to listen to the sound of OP urinating?!
The issue of cleanliness isn’t exclusive to one gender, either.
A recent survey by YouGov asked British men and women what traits would bother them most in a partner. About 71% said that someone who cares less about being clean than they do would make them most uncomfortable.
In another survey, 69% of Americans said the simple act of seeing their partner clean is a turn-on.
“Cleanliness can be such a deal breaker for so many reasons. Mostly, if one person is keeping things clean and tidy and their partner is constantly creating mess and chaos, they can feel like he or she is being disrespectful and selfish, this is even worse than being untidy and unclean,” explains dating coach Jo Barnett.
#10
Bed with no sheets, no pillow cases on pillows and VERY stained mattress. Smelled like dirty greasy hair.
#11
He had spilled milk on the floor from earlier that day and he had just put some paper towels over it, so it was rotting on the floor.
His bedroom floor was covered in dirty laundry, including an old thong his ex had left behind. Then he said his mom "would usually come over and clean but she hadn't been over in a few weeks."
#12
I saw his room when I walked in the door, unmade bed and the FILTHIEST sheets and pillowcases I have ever, EVER soon. That was before I saw the state of the "oh [HELL] NO mess" that was the bathroom. Kitchen reeked, garbage all over. That was the last time I saw that human. It was years ago and I have never forgotten the shock.
Spencers slave no more 13 hours ago (edited)
A good friend of my youngest was looking for somewhere to move into several years ago, after needing to move from his brother's place. I agreed to him moving in to our house because we'd known him for years, and there were no red flags. OMG, the smell emanating from his stuff. I tried to be subtle but....he washed his bedding, and I quote, "when the seasons change". 4 times a year he washed his sheets and could not figure out why he couldn't keep a girlfriend. I can do untidy to a degree, but dirty I absolutely will not tolerate. He was out within 6 weeks, his olfactory residue took longer.
There are plenty of reasons why people don’t like messy environments.
Research shows that living in a cluttered space directly increases stress and makes it much harder to focus on tasks. When a room is messy, the brain’s visual cortex gets overwhelmed by irrelevant objects, making simple projects take twice as long to finish.
Clutter is also closely tied to negative feelings like confusion, anxiety, and irritability. An organized home, on the other hand, creates a sense of calm and well-being. To the human brain, physical mess represents unfinished business, which becomes especially overwhelming during stressful times.
Most people find they can regain control of their environment by clearing clutter and keeping their space organized.
#13
Roaches, which I know is obvious, but to make it worse, he called the roaches his roommates and even more worse he didn't want to hurt them cause he was vegan..... yep.....
#14
Not me but a good friend. She was on a date with what seemed to be a nice, educated and good mannered guy. They went to his place and it was filled with portraits of his mother. On each and every walls, bathroom, toilet, kitchen and bedside tables. Not pictures but paintings that he made.
No need to say that my friend ended the date right there.
#15
No TP! In a house with 3 guys! They used newspaper!
LakotaWolf (she/her) 12 hours ago
My nether mucous membranes just cringed in pain at the thought of this. I've used some sandpapery TP in my time, but newspaper... nooo.
Cleanliness also touches on a common stereotype: that men are naturally messier than women. While it sounds like a simple cliché, both history and recent numbers back it up.
Historically, men were the primary earners while women were expected to handle all the housework. But even as women entered the workforce in massive numbers, that domestic burden never truly balanced out — even in situations where women make more money.
#17
A freezer with several months worth of prepared meals. He flew his mother in from India every 3 months or so and she would cook and freeze food for him. He didn’t know how to do anything domestic. He had a gorgeous apartment in the fanciest part of town and it was filthy. We stopped by there because we were having drinks near there and I needed to [use the bathroom] but it was so gross I couldn’t and I made up an excuse and went home. I did not see him again. He was a super nice guy and was incredibly funny and charming but I could not get over how gross his apartment was and the fact that his mother cooked all his meals despite living in India!!!!
#18
I got bitten by fleas that were in his carpet, then as I was leaving I saw him kick his dog.
Overlooking these early living space red flags during initial dates doesn’t pay off in the long run. Even if women decide to give these guys a chance, the workload almost never balances out over time.
Global data shows that housework remains the most unequally shared responsibility in a household.
According to the European Institute of Gender Equality, around 91% of women with children spend at least an hour a day on chores, compared to just 30% of men with children. On average, working women spend 2.3 hours every day on housework, while working men spend just 1.6 hours.
In the UK, studies show that 45% of female breadwinners still do the vast majority of household tasks, compared to only 12.5% of male breadwinners. For many working women, taking care of the home still equals a second full-time job.
#19
Bro carved my and his name into his wall.
#20
He told me he rented a room in a house, except the room ended up being the garage. And no, it wasn't converted. He asked if I wanted some air flow and grabbed the clicker...
#21
Completely empty. A couple of boxes in one corner. Nothing in the fridge. Not even condiments. I asked “Did you just move in?” He says “Nah, I’ve been here for like three years” It really weirded me out.
Research shows that men and women actually notice mess at the same rate, but society holds women to much higher standards of cleanliness.
Because women face harsher social judgment for a dirty home, they might be socialized from an early age to prioritize household upkeep.
#22
In the room with his gaming PC i saw a bunch of 2L coke bottles filled with light yellow liquid. I didn't ask him, but I'm pretty sure they were filled with urine. He played a lot of Dota, which is a game which I believe you can't leave and go to the bathroom during the match, so my assumption is he would just pee in the bottles while playing matches...
Ew.
#23
Omg! The comments are k*****g me, lmao!🤣 I’m gonna clean my toilet bowl, the tub, change my sheets, shower, and go to bed, lol!
Beyond simple mess or poor hygiene, certain other details serve as immediate warnings. For example, a punched drywall, broken doors, or destroyed furniture often signal unresolved anger and problematic behavioral patterns.
While a sink full of dishes might mean a busy work week, severe neglect and other signs around the house can speak volumes about who a person really is. Pay attention, because sometimes, the walls really can talk.
#24
No bed. Slept on a yoga mat and used a bike tire as a pillow.
#25
We'd been dating for about weeks, 3-4 dates in total. I went to his apartment for the first time and he had an A4 size closeup photo of my face (no neck or shoulders, no body, just my face), framed, mounted on the wall right next to his 5yo son's photo. I had gone over there that day to help him seal up some windows ahead of a pending storm. The photo freaked me out but I held my composure, sealed the windows, gave him a peck on the cheek goodbye and got out of there as fast as I could. Went home, waited a bit, and then sent him a "this ain't gonna work, take that photo down" type of message.
#26
I went to use his bathroom and found multiple pictures of random pregnant women taped to the walls. And three boxes of rubber gloves stacked up on the back of the toilet.
#27
Wire mesh on all the walls / ceilings to protect from radio waves.
He also lived with his uncle.. that stereotypical conspiracy theorist uncle type.
#28
This guy was a marketing exec for a major gun manufacturer so I knew he’d have guns. I was raised in a hunting family so it wasn’t a big deal, conceptually. I was NOT prepared!
He lived in a very large house (son was away at college) and literally had guns and ammo in every room. some well organized and some just spread all over. I kid you not, every room!
NOPE.
#29
When I was younger and extremely naive, I met a guy at his apt for the first (and last) time. I can’t remember if we knew mutual people or not, but he worked for the local pd and I stupidly thought that made me safe, or that he had his life together.
I didn’t make it very far inside, but it was small enough to see the majority of it. He had an air mattress for a couch. He had just cooked taco meat, which smelled terrible, and offered me tacos that I refused. Then wanted to watch a movie on his air mattress. Upon a closer look while he was talking to me, it appeared that he possibly had a severe case of gingivitis.
I had a sudden emergency and had to leave. I’ve done a lot of stupid things, but that one may take the cake.
#30
Counters and sink filled with dirty dishes. One pan was rusted up so bad it broke when he tried to scrub it out so he could cook up dinner for us.
Chrystina Sumpter 3 hours ago
I really wouldn’t want to eat anything prepared in that kitchen.
#31
The toilet was covered in 1" of moss.
#32
Went to visit a friend after he finally moved out of his parents. Three young men (between the ages of 21-25) and he was complaining that he could get girls over but never a second date.
Bedroom was fine. Kitchen, a little messy but not too bad. But the bathroom, lord.
No garbage can, that's fine. Pile of empty toliet paper roles by the toliet. A bar of soap that all three roommates were sharing in the shower AND using as the soap for handwashing. Bro didn't have a SHOWER CURTAIN. They were just laying a towel on the floor and hoping for the best. Towel smelled moldy and rank. Sink was full of beard clippings and tooth paste stains.
My partner and I went out the next morning and bought them a garbage can, hand soap, cleaning supplies and a shower curtian. Told him point blank the issue. I would never ever go on another date with a man if I found out that's how he was living.
BrownEyedGrrrl 5 hours ago
"There aren't many things more gross than someone else's dirty bathroom." ~ My Mom
#33
I've run across multiple men who straight up did not own toilet paper. Just various containers of "dude wipes."
I feel like they should have invested in toilet paper for guests at least!
michael reid 2 hours ago
I heard recently that some men actually don't wipe at all because they think it's gay to touch their own b**t.
#35
The walls were covered in words. He would just grab a sharpie and write whatever was on his mind on the walls. I'm so glad I was there with friends - it felt like it could have been a dangerous situation.
#36
Disgusting bathroom and kitchen -- mold, dirty rags, towels, nothing organized, etc.
I just can't.
#37
3 boxes of Bud Light. I think they were 24 packs. So many empty cans on his countertop.
#38
Three guys living together, one roommate put up a poster of Jessica Alba in the living room/kitchen that was so large it literally took up an entire wall, floor to ceiling. I'm not even sure how you get a poster that big. I think it was a movie poster for Fantastic Four so maybe he got it from a theater?
When I saw it I was like, "Welp, I can tell none of you have girls over."
They also didn't have hand towels in the bathroom so you had to dry your hands on their sweaty bath towel (reeked of BO) or your own pants.
BrownEyedGrrrl 5 hours ago
Meh. 3 guys with a poster of a woman on the wall, but the bathroom's a big no.
#39
I rolled over and saw a booger wall one time. That was a proud moment.
#40
Bunk beds with his roommate.
#41
Several cans of empty Vienna Sausages with just the weird juice rotting in them... Nope.
#42
His ex-wife (that I didn't know about) throwing his clothes out of their shared house. That was fun.
#43
Smelled like there were pets.
There were no pets.
#44
Dirty. Not messy. literally a hoarder room, things were stacked to the ceiling, mold, and it smelled like urine.
#45
Bed on the floor in a carpeted room, fine you’re maybe in the midst of getting a bed frame. but right next to the bed, at the top of it where he lay his head every night to go to bed was the cat. litter. box. i could not believe that in his one bedroom apartment he had all to himself he would choose to sleep next to his cat's [litter box].
#46
Carpeted kitchen AND bathroom & the carpet was not clean.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 12 hours ago
My mother put carpet down in the kitchen in the house I'm living in (I'm the only one living in the house, but she owns the house.) A carpeted kitchen is just as awful as you are imagining it to be.
#47
Floor to ceiling shelves of Funko Pops in the living room, no other decor anywhere. Gaming setup filled the dining room. He did not own a table, I guess he ate in the recliner happily surrounded by the Funkos. He’s 57…..
#48
A living room with empty beer bottles on every level surface as "decoration" that hadn't been dusted in years. In fact, every level surface hadn't been dusted or vacuumed in years. I noped right out of there. I have pretty severe allergies. Went home and had to take my epi pen. Yeach.
meeeeeeeeeeee 3 hours ago
I thought an epi pen was a temporary measure that will help you stay alive to get to the hospital, not just, I was around some dust, so I went all the way home (doesn't sound like someone close to d***h) and casually popped my epi pen like an anti histamine.
#49
I affectionately refer to one guy as "Monster can Smaug" - his bed was in the middle of a mountain of them, they reached the middle of the mattress (which shockingly was on a base) in places.
That guy was my treehouse guy, not relationship material at all in any way.
#50
At the foot of his bed he had a folded throw blanket. Underneath was a blood stain on the comforter that resembled a period stain, which he was obviously trying to conceal with the throw 🚩. He said it was from his ex, that he tried to wash it but the stain wouldn’t come out. I called [nonsense] as the stain didn’t look faded or semi-washed out. He kept insisting and apologized that I had to see that.
He finally washed said comforter a few months later 🚩, and would you know that the stain miraculously washed right out! I realized years later that this was just one of many red flags about this guy. Love is blind and I ended up marrying this lying slob. I could write a book detailing how bad his hygiene was. After three years of marriage, I had had enough of his careless and gross ways. In retrospect, I probably thought he would change once we started living together. I was sorely mistaken. Lesson learned!
#52
Hoarder house. Stacks of newspapers lining the hallway, etc. I don’t know if it was him, or his dad, or both of them, but I was done after that.
#53
No real furniture, just an old recliner and an office chair in the living room, looks like it had never been dusted or swept, and the worst part: a bullet hole in the floor.
#54
Dog p**s and s**t on the floor. Treats pets like s**t. every surface in kitchen covered with bug infested dirty dishes. bathroom so disgusting I didn’t feel comfortable using it. No tp, no hand soap. Any one of these is enough for a a nope. Sadly I have seen all of these at once in one place. Dating in your early 20’s is hard but you quickly learn what you will and will not tolerate.
#56
Giant Klingon weaponry over the fireplace (a bat’leth) and literally no furniture in the room. He had a huge McMansion but only had a huge couch and tv, a bed, and a treadmill in the basement. He was an OB/gyn and he wore his gore-splattered work tennis shoes in the house and on the couch.
#57
Disney princess sheets. I wasn’t going to sleep with him but still… they were his sisters and he was too lazy to change them.
#58
I was very dumb and naive and very lucky I’m so awkward and blunt that nothing happened. Met up with this guy who I worked with and he gave me the wrong address, we drive down to his “grandmother’s” house, tried to go in the front and back door about 5 times as I’m texting my coworker “call the cops if I don’t show up for work tomorrow”. He managed to get in through the back, the lights are all off as he leads me to what I think was a living room but there were 2 identical kind size beds with no sheets on these wooden frames and it’s was probably a trap house? I dunno he tried giving me rum, I faked sipped it. He went to kiss me and it was like that scene in monster’s inc where they scream machine sucks out the screams. I start crying and demand to go home and he lets me. A week later he got fired at work for [using] Xanax at work.
#59
He had no personal items of any kind anywhere in the house. No books, photos, momentos, decor; not even just general belongings, things for hobbies, etc; nothing. A few pieces of furniture only. The only single thing in his house that was not furniture (bed, table, and chair) was one piece of art hanging above his bed- that I made, that he’d bought from me at an artist market years ago when we didn’t know each other. this was after one date. I ended things shortly thereafter. He had described himself as a minimalist but this was just too much for me.
#60
Not first time at his house but rather something I noticed right after we moved in together, hope that’s okay.
I was in the bathroom with the door open, fixing my hair in the mirror. He asked if he could pee while I was still in there, nbd.
He didn’t raise the seat and when he was done peeing, he stood on one leg and took his socked foot and ran it along the seat to soak up the drops he left. He then proceeded to leave the bathroom, walking his p**s-sock-ed foot all over the carpet.
A little while later, he put his shoes on over his p**s-sock and asked if I was ready to go.
I obviously informed him that was not normal or sanitary behavior for an adult. I made him have the carpets professionally cleaned and told him p**s-socks were a hard boundary for me so if he wanted to keep doing it, I’d find somewhere else to live. He was a paramedic too! Ick!
#62
I feel bad sharing this because he was a sweet guy, but he was smoking throughout the date, and was ashing his cigarette into the coffee he was actively drinking.
#63
His toilet looked like it had never been cleaned once since he moved in. He had two young kids btw.
#64
Guy here. I’m answering because I don’t think the s*x/gender matters on this post.
Walked into her apartment and EVERY SINGLE TRASH CAN was overflowing. In her bathroom, the trash can was full. The box next to it was full. There was more trash beside the box.
Her shower was covered in pink slime. Very likely a bacteria that’s pink.
#65
I love how roughly 90% of these comments are women saying how disgusting the homes are of the men they go home with, while about 10% of these are from men who've had women leave because their homes were too clean.
Not sure what to make of that, but it's definitely interesting.
#67
Years ago my best friend and I dated two guys who were also best friends. They invited us over to their place for the first time. We discovered they rented a room in a house from somebody. The room was tiny and they shared a single queen sized bed. We all sat on the bed and watched a movie. The best part is the guy I was dating was like 6’5. My friend and I were so weirded out that we ended things shortly after.
#68
I walked in and the place was filthy like hoarder filthy and reeked of weed. His bed didnt have sheets and he just threw on a blanket ans was like we can just sleep here.....uh no we cannot. He had ONE towel. One. I was like.. ..yeahhhh Im going home.
#69
I'm a guy, but I had a woman nope out on me when she saw my place because I've collected several animal skulls over the years. She thought it was some voodoo stuff.
Doug Moyer 2 hours ago (edited)
I have a racoon skull in my living room. My wife and I found it while we were walking in the woods. I cleaned it up and glued the teeth in place. We've had it for 25 years.
#70
Dirtiest house I’d ever been in. Didn’t even want to sit on the couch in case I caught something. I am a neat freak myself so that was the end of that.
#71
The fridge contained only energy drinks, ketchup, and one lonely pickle.
#72
Walked in and saw a cross stitch on the wall with the date he was ordained as a Catholic Priest!
Multa Nocte (she/her/8647) 13 hours ago
If he left the Church then this isn't a problem. If he's still in it, it's a big problem.
#73
It was 1998, so frail the wind off the lake had knocked me down that winter, goth chick, it was Before Cellphones. We walked into his tiny studio apartment and he asked. “Do you want to see my knife collection?” There was a wall covered in knives. The sort you would buy off the television at 3am from an infomercial. Hundreds of knives…cheap swords…Impossible to miss. I said “I just remembered I have a late shift at work.” Turned and walked out. Ran out of the building. In retrospect the black leather trench coat should have been my first NOPE. But I was young.
#74
Guy #1: He had mantras pinned up on his wall, but not in a good way. They were like power, wealth, success, control, domination.
Guy #2: went into the bathroom while his female roommate showered in there. It was totally casual, like they always did it.
#75
Portrait of Jesus over the bed.
Fellfromthemoon 1 hour ago
That used to be common in many Christian (or only Catholic?) family homes.
#77
The bottom of his bare feet were black from walking around his house. 1 single flat pillow on the bed with no sheets.
#78
A fork in the bathroom.
Why the hell is there a fork in bathroom.
#79
A mattress without sheets. I don't even care how nice the rest of the place is, a bare mattress is an instant "I'm heading home.".
#80
I was dating a guy and we had never spent the night at each others homes. It was all hotel s*x for the first month. I was in my late 40s, he was early 50s. When we decided to commit to dating each other, we decided on his place — it was super cute from the outside. I live in San Jose, CA, close to the Milpitas border. On certain days when the breeze is right you can smell Alviso, the garbage dump.
Anyway, I thought I was smelling Alviso as I was approaching his front door. As he opened it, I noticed his beige rug just as a swarm of chihuahuas came, yapping and barking. Then I saw a chihuahua just pee on the carpet while another was squatting to do a #2. Then as I got closer, I noticed that it wasn’t carpet on the floor.
It was cardboard. It seems he would just cover the floor with cardboard when the dogs would urinate and defecate on it. I got to about 10 to 15 feet from the door. As he was telling me to come in, I went, “Oh my God I forgot your present in the car. Let me go back and get it.”
I calmly walked back to my car, jumped in, and drove off. I blocked him on everything. Later on, I creeped on his profile from a friend…and I was so annoyed w myself because allllll the messy, poopy, pissy signs were there in the background of his pictures. I just never looked at the background because I had been too focused on him. 🤦🏽♀️.
#81
Skid marks on his kid's toilet seat. He wouldn't allow me into the master bathroom. I ended up using the bathroom at a McDonald's. He also loaned me a completely filthy crock pot that my neighbor saw on my kitchen counter and she grabbed it and cleaned it up for me. I broke up with him shortly, thereafter.
#82
Used c****m sitting on the kitchen counter.
Poured Banda 7 hours ago
The censorship here can be frustrating, but I would NEVER have guessed what that word was...
#83
Pubes and body hair all over the bathroom floor. He was a hairy dude but it was just gross. Like clean it up, don’t just leave it there.
#84
Not someone I was seeing, but a friends bf. He had written messages in blood on the walls of his apartment 🫣.
#85
We were carpooling to go to an event in Montréal a while ago. We were a bunch of friends from the geek/nerd/computer club in college, and I happened to be the only girl from the club doing the trip. I don't remember which event that was, but I remember the women's bathroom was just so filthy that I just couldn't bring myself to do my business in there, so we left the event at the end, but seriously, I was just ready to burst.
Not a big problem though, because three guys we all know own an apartment not too far away, and their door is always open, so we'll just drop by, say hi, shoot the s**t a bit, and then leave, right? Right?
There was not a single square of toilet paper anywhere in the apartment. No paper towels, no Kleenex, nothing. They didn't have a proper towel either for drying your hands if you have the strange notion of wanting to clean them afterwards.
I was so taken aback by this. I mean, come on! I understood then why the three of them were single.
#87
A homemade sandbox about the size of a queen bed in his living room for his giant dog to s**t and p**s in during the day.
#88
Went over for drinks and entered a very dirty dual-bachelor pad full of dirty bongs and general filth. That was bad enough but the funny part was the couch. A 3 seater with the middle seat completely missing and destroyed with a big hole that was kind of burnt looking? We were sitting on opposite sides of the couch watching tv and he went to "make his move" by ever so slowly getting closer to me which required him to slowly lie on his side across the giant hole in the couch until he was almost touching me with the top of his head. It was hilarious in hindsight.
#89
I've had dates question if I was gay because:
- No straight man uses a loofah/ bidet/ moisturizer/ has a face routine (well s**t, hands off my hyaluronic then. The sun is a deadly lazer and I dont want cancer)
- You must be gay because only gay men can cook edible food (its just lasagna, not beef wellington) and the same girl...
- Only gay men bake (f**k you I like sugar and baking is literally simple chemistry)
- Who else would keep feminine products in their guest bathroom? (this one actually left, I was raised by women so I sympathize and keep battle rags/ war sponges on hand)
- You use weird words and gays are, like, all cultured. (todays ick is the word "cathartic").
#90
He had a ring around his bathtub, stains all over his kitchen, and a sink full of dishes. Me, young and stupid, offered to wash the dishes. He then stated he didn’t own dish soap. Very quickly noped out and sent probably one of the meanest breakup texts I’ve ever sent.
#91
Used Bandaids left in his uncleaned shower 🤮.
#92
I went to pee in his toilet (only person who lived there) and there was a massive diarrhea t**d. Hard. F*****g. Pass.
#94
Not a date, but when I was living in Hell’s Kitchen in the late ‘80s, I came home one day and the building super was messing with the door of the apartment next to mine. “You want to see what you’ve been living next to?”
Now, I’d seen the neighbor, having been in the building for more than a year. Nice guy, tall and stout; he ran his own tour company with a classic car and used to wear an old-fashioned chauffeur’s uniform.
It turned out he was a hoarder, but at least a very tidy one. When the super opened the door, the whole place—a good-sized studio—was filled to the ceiling with stuff, mostly paper, neatly piled. There were newspapers, magazines, flyers, pizza boxes (meticulously cleaned), all kinds of stuff. The super, I guess through the local grapevine, later found out he did this sequentially—take an apartment and stay in it till it was full. By the end, before he left, it had gotten to the point where he could no longer access the bathroom (and could otherwise only really stand next to the door or sit on one of the lowest piles), and I guess that’s when he moved on.
I worked at Lincoln Center, and I saw him a few more times—still perfectly turned out in his uniform, showing the place off to tourists.
#95
Yeah well if your house is neat and clean, dishes put away etc and you’re obviously not gay (because you’re at my place and we’ve been getting warmed up on the way)?
“You’re married, aren’t you.”.
#97
He told me he could cook, tried to make spaghetti, burnt it, put sauce on it anyway and tried to feed me the burnt spaghetti clump.
Poured Banda 7 hours ago (edited)
How the hell do you burn spaghetti? I suppose you could boil it dry, but it's going to switch from pasta to wheat soup long before that happens...
#99
A whole team of 8 of us flew to a town for a work thing and on Friday 2 dudes sharing a hotel room invited the lot of us over for beers. After taking a p**s I discovered they didn't open their bar soap or have an alternative at the sink in the washroom. I had to open the provided one that was chillin on the counter unopened since they checked in. Dudes touch their d**k n s**t on the daily without washing their grabbies. F*****g rank.
BarkingSquirell 1 hour ago
People not washing their hands after using a washroom is far more common than you'd think.
#101
A p***s pump, right on top of his dresser.
Also no AC in the house and it was peak summer in Chicagoland. So incredibly uncomfortable.
#103
There was water all over his dining room floor. I said “oh! I think you have a leak or something!” He just casually said “oh, no, I just dropped my cup a few days ago and haven’t cleaned it up”.
#104
He left his d***o out.
#105
Was told I'm a red flag due to how clean my place was and how organized my bathroom was. Oddly ocd if I remember carectly. Like should I live in a mess so ypu feel comfortable?
BarkingSquirell 1 hour ago
You be you. I've met many couples who are cleaner/dirtier than the other. It's not written in the Y or X chromosomes.
#107
American Psycho DVD sitting on the hall table when I walked in. I married him though. I’m not great with instincts.
BarkingSquirell 1 hour ago
I really don't think this belongs here. While not my style, a lot of people have watched this movie. Did you expect "Bambi?"
#108
Have had several women ask me if I was a serial killer because my bed was made neatly and my house was very well kept. My response was usually “no you fit the MO the police have created you’d give me away”.
#109
I'm reading these comments and thinking "yeah it's gross. Is this a testament to men being dirty or men being extremely lonely and depressed".
Doug Moyer 2 hours ago
Depression really does make it difficult to do basic tasks like cleaning and cooking.
#110
One guy slept on a sofa pull out in the dinning room of his step brothers house. It wasn’t used as a dinning room since everyone ate in front of the tv. He was truly trying to get back in his feet.
A college guy who thought we were going to do something…..went to his dorm, saw he spit his chew spit directly on the bed bc he slept with it in his mouth. Found out later, that he hooked up with my roommate at the same time he was trying to hook up with me. He said “wait….you know each other??!!” She did confirm that yes, steroids shrunk his junk as rumored and I wasn’t missing out on anything.
BarkingSquirell 1 hour ago
Your second paragraph makes little sense and sometimes a 1-2 person to family will eat in front of the TV because they run out of things to talk about. TV stands, they were called.
#111
What I gather from this thread is that if we men are clean, it's creepy. If we are messy, it's creepy.
What do you think ?
Doug Moyer 2 hours ago
One of the guys that I chat with at the local brewery invited me over to his place to hang out one weekend (seems like the brewery was shut down that day and my wife was out of town). His place was filthy. FILTHY. Nothing had ever been dusted. And he had partial custody of his youngest daughter (maybe 10 at the time). Had to keep the bathroom door closed to keep the rats from getting into the rest of the house. Never went back.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 12 hours ago (edited)
When I was a teen, there was this guy in my town in his 20's who used his house as a rave/drinking station for all the local youths. It was as disgusting as all the stories above, but he also had a literal fùcking HOLE in his bedroom floor about five feet across that went straight down to the kitchen. This guy used to pìss into this hole, aiming for the toilet just off from the kitchen (spoiler: he missed every time). Used to buy everyone booze with dodgy checks and encourage us to literally destroy whatever was left of his minging house. A few years later, he was arrested for CP.
Laszlo Larthlanc 4 hours ago
One of the best things that ever happened in my county was the passing of the Social Host Ordinance. If you host parties for teens and provide them with liquor and the cops get called the first thing that happens is that all of the alcohol gets disposed of while the cops watch. The cops attempt to contact the owner of the home, and it it can be determined that they were the ones who provided the party space and provided the alcohol, they get cited for a $1000 minimum fine. The case is turned over to the county District Attorney, who decides how much further things need to go. For repeat offenders there can be a bigger fine, and if it can be determined that the homeowner was having intimate relations with any of the party-goers they go right to jail. Most of the adults who have been cited for violating the ordinance have been proved to having had inappropriate relationships with at least one of the minors at the party, or causing minors to have relations while they watched.
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Natalia Jahooblies 2 hours ago
How many f*****g times am I going to have to click on the the bloody privacy agreement?!
Doug Moyer 2 hours ago
One of the guys that I chat with at the local brewery invited me over to his place to hang out one weekend (seems like the brewery was shut down that day and my wife was out of town). His place was filthy. FILTHY. Nothing had ever been dusted. And he had partial custody of his youngest daughter (maybe 10 at the time). Had to keep the bathroom door closed to keep the rats from getting into the rest of the house. Never went back.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 12 hours ago (edited)
When I was a teen, there was this guy in my town in his 20's who used his house as a rave/drinking station for all the local youths. It was as disgusting as all the stories above, but he also had a literal fùcking HOLE in his bedroom floor about five feet across that went straight down to the kitchen. This guy used to pìss into this hole, aiming for the toilet just off from the kitchen (spoiler: he missed every time). Used to buy everyone booze with dodgy checks and encourage us to literally destroy whatever was left of his minging house. A few years later, he was arrested for CP.
Laszlo Larthlanc 4 hours ago
One of the best things that ever happened in my county was the passing of the Social Host Ordinance. If you host parties for teens and provide them with liquor and the cops get called the first thing that happens is that all of the alcohol gets disposed of while the cops watch. The cops attempt to contact the owner of the home, and it it can be determined that they were the ones who provided the party space and provided the alcohol, they get cited for a $1000 minimum fine. The case is turned over to the county District Attorney, who decides how much further things need to go. For repeat offenders there can be a bigger fine, and if it can be determined that the homeowner was having intimate relations with any of the party-goers they go right to jail. Most of the adults who have been cited for violating the ordinance have been proved to having had inappropriate relationships with at least one of the minors at the party, or causing minors to have relations while they watched.
Load More Replies... Natalia Jahooblies 2 hours ago
How many f*****g times am I going to have to click on the the bloody privacy agreement?!
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