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Bio Mom Throws A Fit After Realizing Daughter Wants To Honor Dad’s Bestie As Mom At Her Wedding
Interview With ExpertWhen my parents were putting together the guest list for their upcoming wedding, my father took a piece of paper and wrote in large letters under the first number: “Mother.” It’s no surprise; for the vast majority of us, our mother is a very special person in our lives, the most important one. However, there are always exceptions…
Today, we’ll tell you about one such exception – a story from the user u/Lucky-Adeptness3413, whose biological mother suddenly returned to her life after twenty years of separation – and immediately demanded a place of honor at the daughter’s wedding. However, let’s just tell things in order and read on for the details.
More info: Reddit
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A mother is in fact the most important person in the life of almost every one of us – but there are exceptions, as always
Image credits: rawpixel.com / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author of the post was literally abandoned by her own bio mom when she was 5, and was raised by her dad, with the help of his female bestie
Image credits: Lucky-Adeptness3413
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
This lady became the girl’s true mother, and even when she married and had kids herself, she remained a maternal figure for the author
Image credits: Lucky-Adeptness3413
Image credits: arty / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
But recently, when the woman was about to get married, her bio mom unexpectedly appeared in her life
Image credits: Lucky-Adeptness3413
The woman demanded the honor place at the reception and became incredibly livid after being rejected by the newlyweds-to-be
The Original poster (OP) is getting married soon, and among the honored guests invited to the wedding will be the groom’s parents, her own dad, and his best friend, “Phoebe.” The thing is, our heroine was born when her parents were teens, and a couple of years later, her bio mother decided she and her dad weren’t on the same page and moved to another part of the country, effectively abandoning maternity.
She barely sent child support or contacted her daughter for nearly two decades, and Phoebe became her true mother. Over time, Phoebe married and had two sons herself, but she was always happy that the author considered her almost a mom and her children – almost siblings.
And then, shortly before the wedding, our heroine’s biological mother suddenly appeared in her life. The original poster didn’t refuse contact, but she made it clear that she shouldn’t count on a close family relationship—especially not being at the mother’s place at the wedding reception. That position, as you’ve probably already guessed, would be filled by Phoebe.
Upon learning of this, the author’s bio mom became livid, threw a huge tantrum, and even called Phoebe a “thief of daughters.” In response, the OP’s fiancé firmly declared that the wedding was their own business, and only they could actually decide who to invite and who would occupy the seats of honor. So our heroine is now wondering whether it was even worth inviting this woman – a de facto stranger – to the wedding.
Image credits: milanmarkovic / Freepik (not the actual photo)
“By and large, being a biological parent doesn’t automatically make you a true parent – especially if the person essentially cuts off all contact with the child and isn’t involved in their life in any way,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, with whom Bored Panda got in touch for a comment here. “That’s why the term ‘biological parents’ actually exists.”
So, the expert really believes that communicating with a biological parent after years of no contact can be beneficial for anyone, especially if that communication is based on a healthy relationship. But the situation described in this story is clearly far from being healthy.
“This woman was lucky to have such a maternal figure in her life, who gave her everything she was deprived of because of her biological mother’s deeds. So, it’s not surprising that in her eyes, her godmother is her true mother. And no biology can, in fact, change that,” Irina Matveeva concludes.
People in the comments also fully supported our heroine, arguing that if her biological mom had truly wanted to be more than just a wedding guest, she actually had twenty years to change things. She didn’t – so she has only herself to blame. “Tell her to go back to where she came from,” someone added in the comments. So do you, our dear readers, also agree with this?
Most commenters agreed that the author did everything right, and that she probably shouldn’t have invited her bio mom to the wedding at all
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