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There are few things more painful than realizing this is the end of a relationship you hoped would last. And even though the “it’s over” moment can be heartbreaking, sometimes there’s no other choice but to end things. Especially when your partner clearly doesn’t care about you anymore; if they ever did in the first place.

Members of Reddit’s ‘Ask Women’ community discussed their experience with such partners in a thread started by the user ‘Street_Salt_1973’. They asked the women when they realized that their partner didn’t care for them, and quite a few were willing to share. Providing answers that cover stories ranging from aggravating to heart-wrenching, the members showed that lack of care can be enough to bring the fairytale to its final chapter.

#1

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When I explained that I'd been feeling depressed because playing music is my outlet and I'd been really missing it. I bought a keyboard for the extra bedroom which he didn't notice for 2+ months. When he did notice he told me to get rid of it because he doesn't want "extra junk" in his house. I only played with headphones and usually when he wasn't home but he told me if the keyboard didn't go, I had to. So I took the keyboard and left.

KualaG , Monica Escalera Report

#2

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread He's an ex-husband. When I begged him not to tell me what happened at the strip club because I knew I'd use the knowledge to torture myself, the first thing he did when he got home was brag about the lap dances he got and how hot those women were compared to me in an attempt to upset me because he wanted attention. It didn't work and I ignored him, so he punched my chair. We had problems before that, but that night killed any respect I had left. Things deteriorated quickly afterwards.

On a bright note, my boyfriend now has never even raised his voice at me. At every opportunity he tries to make the choice that would make me feel the most safe, loved, and respected. If your current partner is showing that they don't care about you, leave. There's a better life out there for you. I've never felt more lucky than I do now.

Brittakitt , Hasan Albari Report

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#3

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread I was physically assaulted at work. When I told him about it I expected him to be horrified, protective, or at least not happy about it. Instead, he looked bored. He implied that I get a bit mouthy so maybe I pissed off the wrong guy. I got the ick so fast there was no turning back.

cuddlymammoth , Yan Krukau Report

#4

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread Id come down with a horrible flu. He convinced me to come over to his place “let me take care of you, you shouldn’t be suffering alone” I wanted to just stay in my own bed and ride it out but he kept at it and I thought he was just trying to be a caring boyfriend.

He just pestered me for sex the whole time and then guilt tripped me when I said I didn’t want to because I was feeling so rough “you mean sex with me would make you feel worse/wouldn’t make you feel happier…. Right, got it, THANKS”

I wish I’d dumped his a*s right then but I was young and deep into a sunken cost fallacy.

Rasberryblush , Polina Tankilevitch Report

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Vasana Phong
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why do men do this, I don’t understand, there’s going to be days where you just don’t feel it it, could be a hundred things going on that has nothing to do with them, maturity plays a huge role

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#5

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When I was heavily pregnant and we were arguing. I started feeling pain in the abdomen and collapsed but he just stood there and laughed and said it served me right.

forestgnome1 , Leah Kelley Report

#6

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread we were out in town and he wanted to grab some street food. i didn't have money on me so i just... got nothing. he didn't offer. i sat next to him watching him eat.

it was small, and yes i could've said something. but it was just one of many occasions that made me understand that he doesn't care about me the way i care about him. after two damn years.

minty_dinosaur , Gonzalo Acuña Report

#7

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread Me, when I fell down the stairs at my boyfriend's house and I was screaming in pain because I broke my ankle and he got mad at me because he had to drive me to the hospital he later told me he got angry because he wanted to play elden ring

Street_Salt_1973 , Kindel Media Report

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#8

I returned to Australia in 2021 following a horrible journey back to Scotland (where we got stuck for 3 months) after the murder of my older brother. When I finally got out of hotel quarantine, I witnessed my sister reuniting with her partner who ran to her and hugged her like he was never going to let go. When my partner of 10 years picked me up from the airport, he looked irritated and like he didn’t want to be there. I hugged him but he barely returned it. I found out a few months later he had started talking to other girls online while I was stuck in Scotland dealing with the fallout of what happened to my brother.

ETA: He’d been an ex for almost a year now.

grindelwaldd Report

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#9

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When he critiqued how I gave birth.

TheEmpressDodo , Jimmy Conover Report

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Lemme get the lemons
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I like to see him do better. I wouldn't actually because that's disgusting and I'm a child, BUT THE POINT STILL STANDS!

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#10

When he accused me of being manipulative because I was crying. Why was I crying? Because I had literally just received the news that my closest friend had committed suicide.

RepresentativeSwan54 Report

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Alexigirl1
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a Twatbasket! I hope you are being supported now. I'm sorry for your loss Xx

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#11

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When i realized that i was always needing to adjust to his schedule and the relationship immediately fell apart when i stopped putting in the effort

paperhoarder2021 , RDNE Stock project Report

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Alexigirl1
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Compromise is a word some guys (and gals) haven't heard of. It HAS to be two way. Or no way.

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#12

Me: “I’m in so much pain from my broken pelvis” Him: “Yeah, well, I’m tired too, ya know!” And proceeds to get mad that I am too physically broken to have sex. Actually mad.

SonaraSounds Report

#13

when he beat the s**t out of me twice for being pregnant, both ended with miscarriages.
it sucks but for the better.

msshroomsx Report

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PA
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OP- I am sorry for your losses. I hope you have support and are safe now.

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#14

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread I fell and twisted my ankle one evening after he had dropped me off for my evening class. Someone riding a bike had to actually go after him to stop him from driving off completely and leaving me there. When he came back to me he was super annoyed and asked me what he was supposed to do about it. So I made him drive me to the urgent care. He then proceeded to make me take my heavy backpack inside with our 2 small children and left us there. He wanted to go get high on drugs. I couldn’t even walk and was so embarrassed and angry. I had to call my mom to come pick us up once I was done because he wouldn’t answer the phone. The entire time my ankle was sprained he never once offered to help do anything. This is one of the many reasons he’s my ex 🙃

DragDolly , Andrea Piacquadio Report

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would’ve stayed at Mom’s, and had all my large male relatives and friends go with me to pack my s**t and leave his sorry a*s.

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#15

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When he wouldn’t go get me food after I worked 12 hours and he had the whole day off and I hadn’t eaten yet that day. The place was like a 5 min drive away but he asked me to get it delivered instead. It took 2 hours for the food to get there. I cried because it was Super Bowl Sunday and we had all you can eat/drink packages so I ran around a lot and opened the restaurant that morning too. I was so tired. I broke up with him 2 days later.

vglyog , Mental Health America (MHA) Report

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OP, don’t demean yourself with some deadbeat a*****e. Wait for the magic when a truly wonderful guy comes along. Believe me, it’s so worth the wait. Even if he didn’t get takeout, my hubby would at least fix me a plate of food himself, either fresh once I got home, or put aside a cold plate or a hot meal wrapped up to microwave, for me to eat when I got home. I waited until I was pushing 40 for him. Looking back on previous boyfriends, I’m glad he’s the only one I wanted to marry. Totally worth the long wait.

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#16

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread The one that was an eye opener was while we were fetching a couple of items from the local store, I got really dizzy and fell on the floor (had vertigo balance issues at the time) she didn’t even notice, and kept on walking around the store, one of the staff brought me a chair to sit down, after a while I managed to find my balance and went to find her, told her what happened, she started shouting defensively. It was over that week. Had to end it.

trueblueink , Engin Akyurt Report

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#17

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread I had to drive a couple hours to say goodbye to my dying grandpa in the hospital. On my way back home, I stopped at Chipotle for dinner. My then boyfriend’s first reaction when he saw me—rather than comforting me because I’d just visited my grandpa for the last time—was to get angry that I didn’t get him a burrito.

emshlaf , LikeMeat Report

#18

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When I had to have an emergency procedure and instead of him driving me, I had to take the train because it was too early for him to bring me. I had no drivers license.
A week later he helped his family at 7AM to move.

Priority noted.

WizardLizart Report

#19

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When the "your match is about to expire" notification popped up while he was showing me tik toks.

crinmar10 , cottonbro studio Report

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rob
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Jup, depending on how long you have been dating/together, but that's a pretty clear indicator something is wrong

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#20

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread He cried to me about emotional issues sometimes and I always held him and talked him through it. Eventually I needed the same support but instead he got mad and started yelling, blaming me, and told me, "one of us has to be the strong one, I can't have a partner who falls apart like this. I need someone strong."

IsItTurkeyNeckOrDick , Leah Kelley Report

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Nay Wilson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That’s not the way it works. Everyone needs to be able to fall apart sometimes

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#21

When he didn't want to tell one of his (unbeknownst to me, MANY) bits on the side that it was over because (and I quote) he "didn't want to hurt her feelings!"

And then again when I was only hours from having heart surgery and he chose that moment to tell me he didn't love me anymore.

Now I'm with a guy who actually loves me and I regret ever giving that thing I used to date the time of day.

CalalilySunshine Report

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Stephanie A Mutti
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's sad and hopeful at the same time to see we sometimes need a minute to realize it's not working, but that the next go around we are much wiser in our choices.

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#22

When he tripped and fell into his girl best friend’s vagina.

nextdoorgirl666 Report

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#23

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread So many small things that I justified as differences in communication. The final realization was when I tried talking about my complicated relationship with my father and he started getting angry at me for not understanding what fathers go through and general explanation of why life sucks for men. Like bro. Are you gaslighting me about my own relationship with my dad?

The bulb just went on that he doesn't care enough to understand my experiences. Broke up within the next 2 weeks.

sm_aztec , RDNE Stock project Report

#24

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread Ex partner. I broke a glass accidently and stepped on a piece screaming. He didn't even come into the kitchen which was right next to our bedroom. Even after I yelled for him to get something to stop the bleeding.

bookandbark , www.pexels.com Report

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Snow_White
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My ex broke a glass and didn't bother to clean up properly. I found out because I got a piece of glass stuck in my foot.

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#25

During a fight, I'm begging for him to use kind words. No verbal abuse, stay quiet and listen to respond, just have a real conversation. He tells me "that's not who I am, I'm not changing for you." Idk why it took so long for me to realize, but he just doesn't give a s**t about me. I realized he would continue doing that as long as I am around to take it.

FeFiFoMums Report

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Angrywolf
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My ex was like that to, And im Dutch and when you want to swear or hurt somebody with words Dutch is one of the worst languages out there, We can be truly rude and hurtful if we want to.

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#26

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread I confronted him and found out I was just a side piece. I cried for days, mostly because I couldn’t believe I was that stupid.

MyOtherFunLogin , Pixabay Report

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Maisey Myles
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey- you're not stupid. You were smart enough to get away from him. I felt the same about my ex. I was so angry with him until I realized I was really mad at myself for not getting out of there sooner. Therapy helped

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#27

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When my ex proposed to me and then three weeks later started cheating on me with an employee that was underage

jinxisco , Andre Jackson Report

#28

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When I found out he had never actually stopped contact with the woman he cheated on me with. They just moved their sexting convos over to a different app. F*****g a*****e.

Hefty-Ad-5938 , Blue Bird Report

#29

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When he said I don’t enjoy giving you orgasms because then you don’t want to have sex for a few days after that.

Or maybe when he told me we never went on a honeymoon because he knew he wasn’t going to get any sex.

ohisforodd , Gustavo Fring Report

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#30

Women Share How They Realized Their Partner Didn't Even Like Them In This Excruciating Online Thread When I had to take a cab home from the emergency room in the middle of the night because he went home to sleep.

weenertron , Pixabay Report

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