Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser
BoredPanda Add Post

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

49-Year-Old Mom Happily Shares How She Adopted A Child Recently But The Internet Starts Shaming Her
109points
3.8K
Parenting, Social Issues2 months ago

49-Year-Old Mom Happily Shares How She Adopted A Child Recently But The Internet Starts Shaming Her

Meet Kris Monsour, a happy mom to a beautiful 2-year-old toddler named Ainsley. But her journey to motherhood was not an easy one to begin with as she shared it on TikTok.

“Being told at 41, after my latest miscarriage, that I would never be a mom and to ‘accept my fate,’” the caption said in a video she posted on her TikTok channel @thevintageparents which already amassed a total of 9.4M likes. The second part of the video shows happy Monsour lovingly holding her daughter and the caption says “me at 51 with my two-year-old.”

Shockingly, many commenters showed no empathy to Monsour’s story and instead, used the comment section to share shaming remarks. And you wonder how come people can be so blatantly cruel.

More info: Instagram | TikTok | Beacons.ai

But at 49, Monsour adopted a girl, filling her life with the joys of motherhood

Image credits: thevintageparents

Image credits: thevintageparents

The stigma around older mothers is still pretty strong in our society. But the science is debunking it by showing that children of older mothers have fewer behavioral, social and emotional difficulties.

This recent research printed in “The European Journal of Developmental Psychology” showed promising outcomes for young children born to older moms. It suggests that older women tended to punish their children less by verbal or physical means. The patience these women cultivate throughout their lives comes into play, which they then offer to their children. As a result, their children don’t suffer from behavioral issues at as high of a rate as other children.

She has been sharing her journey on her TikTok channel The Vintage Parents

@thevintageparents However motherhood comes to you, it’s a miracle. #thevintageparents #adoptionstory #miscarriage #thevintagemom #whatalie #miscarriages ♬ What a time by Niall Horan and Julia Michaels – ana.tpwk 

There may be many reasons to why are older moms more patient and less likely to lash out, such as the fact that they’re likely more financially stable and finished with their education. Their career path is set, or they’re in a position to stay home full-time. Because of the previous advantages, older moms may have better access to prenatal care and healthcare in general.

Image credits: thevintageparents

Moreover, the authors of the same research found that age alone plays a huge role in how moms parent. It is believed that as women grow older they tend to be more tolerant of others and more flexible. This may come as a huge benefit for a child whose mother is aware of not only their, but also their own emotional wellbeing.

Image credits: thevintageparents

It’s no secret that women are put under immense pressure in our society, especially when it comes to marrying and having children, in general. “These days, women feel the pressure to ‘do and have it all.’ We feel that we are expected to be able to have a successful career, provide financially, have a happy marriage, and be a full-time parent,” Jane Parker, an Advanced Relationship Coach, told Bored Panda.

But some people shared nasty comments on the family’s TikTok channel

“Women also have higher expectations to be physically attractive and have a stronger need to be nurturing and empathic. Self-care can take a major back seat for some women when trying to achieve all of this,” she explained.

Although pressure to get married varies in different cultures and religions, Parker feels that the pressure for women to get married is greater than for men, which is interesting as women are more independent now than ever before. “Parents, often, very much want to become grandparents, and so, that pressure is more on women than men. The fertility rate in the US is lower than it has been in 35 years.”

Luckily, at least some people showed their support for the mom who felt heartbroken

Despite all the hate, they are a happy and loving family, cherishing all the moments they spend together

Share on Facebook
You May Like
Popular on Bored Panda
Write comments
Anonymous Female
Community Member
2 months ago

The comment "too old to grandparent." Did they really mean, "too old for me to drop my kid off all the time so that I don't have to raise them"??

Little Wonder
Community Member
2 months ago

Bingo.

Load More Replies...
Caro Caro
Community Member
2 months ago

WOW. Some of the comments are very negative. Why not adopt a child when you're 50? If you can give a child a happy, secure and loving home then go for it. Women have had babies at an older age and those children are fine. Maybe it's tough that you could lose a parent at 20 or 30 but that happens regardless of age. Car accidents and illness lurking around the corner sucks at any age.

Trillian
Community Member
2 months ago

Yup. Better than a 20year old who accidentally got pregnant and has no clue about life herself yet.

Load More Replies...
Robert T
Community Member
2 months ago

Some seriously f***ed up comments on here. 49 is not old. 70 is not really that old. Unless she is still working full time, she is likely to have more time to look after a child and give them more love and opportunities than someone in their 20s or 30s. If she has taken early retirement, she will be in an even better position to be a full time parent. Quit being so judgemental!

Stephen Taylor
Community Member
3 weeks ago

well 70 is pretty old, to be fair. it 70 isn't old, what is?

Load More Replies...
Load More Comments
Anonymous Female
Community Member
2 months ago

The comment "too old to grandparent." Did they really mean, "too old for me to drop my kid off all the time so that I don't have to raise them"??

Little Wonder
Community Member
2 months ago

Bingo.

Load More Replies...
Caro Caro
Community Member
2 months ago

WOW. Some of the comments are very negative. Why not adopt a child when you're 50? If you can give a child a happy, secure and loving home then go for it. Women have had babies at an older age and those children are fine. Maybe it's tough that you could lose a parent at 20 or 30 but that happens regardless of age. Car accidents and illness lurking around the corner sucks at any age.

Trillian
Community Member
2 months ago

Yup. Better than a 20year old who accidentally got pregnant and has no clue about life herself yet.

Load More Replies...
Robert T
Community Member
2 months ago

Some seriously f***ed up comments on here. 49 is not old. 70 is not really that old. Unless she is still working full time, she is likely to have more time to look after a child and give them more love and opportunities than someone in their 20s or 30s. If she has taken early retirement, she will be in an even better position to be a full time parent. Quit being so judgemental!

Stephen Taylor
Community Member
3 weeks ago

well 70 is pretty old, to be fair. it 70 isn't old, what is?

Load More Replies...
Load More Comments
Popular on Bored Panda
Popular on Bored Panda
User Submissions
Also on Bored Panda
Also on Bored Panda