Life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, high salaries and breezing by on ‘easy mode’ when you’re a man. No matter your gender, life is challenging. Your purpose isn’t handed to you on a silver platter. And happiness isn’t a guarantee if you don’t strive to move toward it. And there are a lot of things that guys would love everyone to know about what it’s actually like to be a man. Though, sometimes, we’re far too shy to say them out loud.

However, anonymity helps. Internet users have taken to Reddit to share the most annoying things about being a guy, after being prompted to open up their hearts by user u/justjuiced22. The answers, which you’ll find below, are candid and range from the silly-yet-relatable to the more serious. Have a read through the posts as you scroll down and upvote the ones that you agree with or that you were surprised by.

Do you have some thoughts on your mind that you’d like to share with the other readers? That’s what the comment section is there for, Pandas. So don’t be shy, share your own insights about the viral Reddit thread and what these men’s answers say about society, below.

I reached out to fitness expert Jack Bly for a few comments about masculinity, confidence, and men's issues. Here's what he had to say. "I’d say biggest issues that men have to deal with nowadays revolve around their inputs. Social media, TV, music, etc. Most people have inputs that constantly spout negativity and victim mentality. These inputs ultimately dictate their thoughts and as a result of their actions," he told Bored Panda. Scroll down for the full interview with Jack.

#1

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) When I'm out alone with my toddler a lot of women look at me as if I'm an anomaly and a lot of guys look at me as if I'm being forced to do this. Like the "oof sorry bro" face.

It's weird that being a good dad is apparently such a rare thing that when I'm fully in charge of my son people assume there's something wrong with me and my partners relationship. I just like spending time with my son and pushing a stroller doesn't make me less of a man.

thicchaggisboi , Mohamed Awwam Report

Monday
Community Member
10 months ago

It makes you more than a man. Being a guy makes you man, spending time with your son makes you a dad. So now you are both a man and a dad.

View More Replies...
View more comments

According to fitness expert Jack, the biggest issue for men is not having a purpose in life. That, in turn, affects all areas of a person's life. " I believe the core of being a good man is in true purpose. Men without purpose tend to be unhappy, depressed, lost," Jack shared his thoughts with Bored Panda.

"Figure out your purpose by getting clear on your values and what’s most important to you. As far as activities go, I’m always an advocate of pursuing good health as that is our foundation for our mind, energy, and mood."

Jack added that he believes there "absolutely" is "a crisis for confidence among men." In his view, the reasons for this are obvious. "Most men have no reason to be confident. 73% are overweight, 80% are in debt, 50% are divorced. The best thing men can do to overcome this is to commit to the journey of self-development and finding their purpose," he said.

The expert advocates pursuing excellence in health, wealth, and relationships. "When you do this, you provide yourself true reasons to build confidence."

#2

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Male eating disorders get zero attention.

JadedTrekkie , Samuel Ramos Report

Lauren Caswell
Community Member
10 months ago

Bless Andrew Flintoff for speaking up about his bulimia struggles. We need more and we need it yesterday, too many males have been lost to this and it really sucks. You can't find help for your friend because he's male and it's so stupid. This was in the mid-2000s but it's no better today. Everyone can have eating disorders its not just women, and we all deserve support for it

View More Replies...
View more comments
#3

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Getting very few/no compliments from my SO. I want to be told nice things about myself too.

Aneides , Jakob Owens Report

Elin Noller
Community Member
10 months ago

I think this depends a lot on the person you are with. Most women I know like giving compliments to ppl they love.

View More Replies...
View more comments

The thread links to the broader discussion of what guys and ‘real men’ should and shouldn’t do, what behaviors are frowned upon by society, and understanding of masculinity leads to a healthy, happy lifestyle.

A short while ago, I spoke about men’s issues and masculinity with redditor M_RONA who gave some great in-depth insights on the topic.

"I think, as men, we need to be more open about our issues and acknowledge the fact that we face some tough [stuff], often imposed on us by other guys. There’s nothing wrong with being honest about what’s bothering us, and I think just being able to talk about some of the issues we face would be a major contributing factor to our general well-being. Something as simple as just asking our friends how they’re doing in life could go a long way!" he told Bored Panda in an honest and open interview.

#4

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Dealing with other men. The number of testosterone poisoned, porcelain figurine fragile ego having bastards seems endless.

The_Unreal , John Arano Report

Caro Caro
Community Member
10 months ago

Yes, we women understand. That is really hard to deal with. I just avoid those testostercronies.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#5

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) The assumption that because I am the father that I don't know, or am incapable of taking care of my kids. People ask my wife all the time if she needs to rush home when she leaves the kids with me. I am not a babysitter, I know what I am doing.

dyeson , Steven Van Loy Report

Brendan Roberts
Community Member
10 months ago

Yeah, this is a big one. I gave my number (as the main contact) to my eldest's school and my youngest's childminder, as I work from home and live 5 mins away from both. But they always call my wife first. She works about 30 mins away from the school and childminder.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#6

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Not being able to talk about our emotions. Like hello, hi, I am a human being who would like to talk about their problems without the feeling of being judged.

Agent527 , Nik Shuliahin Report

Ozacoter
Community Member
10 months ago

That is terrible. We are a social species and need emotional support. Hugs

View more comments

According to M_RONA, one thing that’s happening in modern times is that the term ‘toxic masculinity’ gets taken way out of context, gets used where it shouldn’t, and sometimes misrepresents reality.

"While I absolutely agree that there are many male traits taken to the extreme that have horrible consequences for the people around them, I think the term is sadly being overused to mislabel normal and perfectly healthy male behavior," he explained.

The interviewee noted that it’s often other men who pressure guys into conforming and acting a certain way. This, in turn, can make it very hard for men to be emotionally vulnerable when they need to be.

#7

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) This might seem petty or dumb, but right now, my fiancée and I are planning our wedding (She's female, I'm Male, we're a hetero couple).

I'm SUPER into the planning. I'm not at all a typical "macho" "cant be bothered with the frills and pomps" type of dude. I'm having fun helping putting together this day for my best friend and I!

Everytime we meet with a vendor they solely talk to her and ignore me entirely, acting on an assumption that she's a typical "Bridezilla" planning this day single handedly and I'm just some Bro she's shacking up with. When I do pitch in, the vendors almost act in an "ooooook, dont worry big guy, leave this to the adults" kind of way. It's more obvious in some than it is in others, but its damn infuriating. It's extremely frustrating and belittling. My fiancée is aware of it, and sticks up for me when necessary.

Like snap dude, you're damn straight I've got an opinion on the aesthetic of our f@#$ing orchid placement, take me seriously!

bucketbiz9429 , Jeremy Wong Weddings Report

Andy Acceber
Community Member
10 months ago

I hope you're in a large enough city to find different vendors. If vendors don't respect your opinion, they obviously don't want your money. Take it to someone without the outdated gender norms.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#8

Being physically and mentally abused usually means a lot less to people than if it were a girl who were the victim. If the girl's the abuser and you're the victim almost no one will care at all and will almost always shame you for it. And when you try to defend yourself against a female, you're looked at like the monster

Constant_Alternative Report

Penny Fan
Community Member
10 months ago

My bro is a copper and one of has "regulars" was a body builder who was being beaten by his mrs. He was over 6' and built like a brick shithouse, she was 5'2" and 7 stone sopping wet. Whenever the cops arrived she'd pretend like she was the one being beaten and it never went any further. One day he just said to my bro "mate, look at me. If I hit her she'd be dead". Bro tried really hard to go for a conviction for her, but the CPS wouldn't touch it.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#9

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Not being socially acceptable to carry a purse.

Like yeah, I'd love to always have my earbuds, phone charger, deodorant, small cologne sampler, and be able to store my keys, wallet, and phone without either stabbing my legs with keys when the pants are tight or having my phone slip out when I'm getting out of cars with loose fitting pants. I can think of so many things I'd bring in my man purse...

x_Pyro Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
10 months ago

Most Russian men carry a small purse/ document bag because of all the documents/ masks/ chargers etc you must carry. No one thinks it is odd.

View More Replies...
View more comments

“A lot of guys were talking about how, as a man, they found it extremely difficult to talk and be open about their feelings. I think that stems from this notion that men are supposed to be so hardened and stoic that we never let things get to us, and if we ever experience a negative emotion, we shouldn’t process it, we should just bottle it up and 'be a man.'"

According to M_RONA, having a stoic attitude and a hardened mind are “certainly virtuous values” that help in life. But if these values are taken to the extreme and repress any and all emotions, the end result can be very harmful.

“The basic attitude of 'men should do this, and women should do that' is hampering to both men and women, I think, something both sexes are guilty of doing, unfortunately," M_RONA shared with Bored Panda.

"I think we all face issues of conformity and set expectations for what we’re supposed to do, and I guess it’s up to all of us to promote and cheer on people who don’t fit into certain categories that we make for ourselves.”

#10

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Honestly, I think the most annoying thing is the competitiveness of other males. Especially when it comes to women. I’ve been out with gfs and some dude will come up and blatantly start hitting on her. We’d make it apparent that we’re together and then the ridicule starts. “You’re with this guy?” “I bet he really sucks at ____.” “I could be better than him.” That alpha male s**t bugs the hell out of me.

DoorNo_5 , Marvin Meyer Report

Ozacoter
Community Member
10 months ago

Those men are pathetic

View More Replies...
View more comments
#11

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) I'm 20, have no facial hair, very little muscle mass (barely started working out this year), almost no stamina, kissless, virgin, got slapped at a party recently (by some drunk dude), and I collect action figures (I'm still working on not being too ashamed of this one).

I feel like a total loser sometimes. Like I'm not a real man. It hurts, but at the same time I don't want to try to put on a fake man mask or anything. I guess I'm just too young to figure these things out.

FerminFermin115 Report

David Evans
Community Member
10 months ago (edited)

Muscles don't matter, you get to choose when and who you want to share your affection with, and you don't need anyone to tell you that you are awesome, you are! I've been in the Army for 21 years and I've met the biggest douchebags who were muscular egotists (I used to be one of them), people of a slimmer frame, and heavy set people and society focuses on physical attributes over what's most important; your character and how you treat people. As for collectables, I'm 41 and still like them. The times of people being looked at as weird for enjoying pop culture are fading. Those who judge people on their own personal hobbies do not know what they are missing. One of the things that took me almost 20 years to realize is that you have to love yourself first and appreciate the things you love without caring what others think. Do not try to be something you are not just to fit in societie's mold of what you think a man should be. Look for people with common interests and you'll find that there are entire communities of people that love what you love. If you want to get in shape, that's great for health but don't let those attributes define you. Best of luck!

View More Replies...
View more comments
#12

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Walking into a public restroom and getting your shoes stuck to the ground because of all the dried piss on the floor.

gyroggg , Oliver Hale Report

Marc
Community Member
10 months ago

Not only men restrooms. My wife is usually very disgusted by women restrooms. The reason is that women often won't sit down either, because of the nasty toilets left by others. Personally, I try to avoid public restrooms whenever possible. I really hate them.

View More Replies...
View more comments

Meanwhile, British psychotherapist Silva Neves told Bored Panda that toxic masculinity is mostly centered around a “general attitude perpetuated by systemic misogyny” than specific behaviors. 

He detailed that at the core of these “distorted ideas” lie things like the notion that men should “always be winners,” shouldn’t feel any vulnerability, and shouldn’t be perceived as weak or soft.

“Men with toxic masculinity usually have negative views towards women's rights (including their rights to the freedom of their own sexuality) and they tend to be homophobic,” the expert said.

“A man with healthy masculinity is the opposite to these traits: someone who is self-reflective, embraces their emotions including sadness, anxiety and crying, a man who isn't afraid of their own femininity and believes that women are equal, and therefore are very clear about respecting boundaries and consent with women.”

#13

Being told that my emotions don't matter. You know what happens when people bottle up their emotions? They either kill themselves or end up on the 6:00 news.

Mr_Gibus Report

Natasha
Community Member
10 months ago

This .

View more comments
#14

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) The stigma that every time I talk to a woman I don't know I automatically want to date them. Like f**k maybe I like talking to women because men don't open up about feelings and women actually listen just lookin for a friend man.

Xsendox , Christin Hume Report

Elin Noller
Community Member
10 months ago

It is a "stigma" because it is more or less a rule. All women have had male friends they thought were their friend that turned out to just want to get in their pants. The term "Friend zoned" exist cause of all those men who pretend to be your friend.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#15

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Less annoying and more upsetting but: The lack of mental health outreach for men.

Kooba9 , Nathan McDine Report

kjorn
Community Member
10 months ago

i saw and heard some woman in the news just says stuff like: to hell with mens, we are more important, it's our turn. this is just some shitty way to think. it wasn't ok to threat woman like that before but it's not ok to take revenge at those who wasn't even there when all that happen

View More Replies...
View more comments
#16

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Shopping for clothes. I've noticed in every clothing store, we have this small corner in the back of the store for our clothes then the rest of the store is 95% female clothing.

imalonleyguytbh , Alexander Kovacs Report

DUN DUN
Community Member
10 months ago

In my country we do have separate floors or separate rooms for men, women and kids sections

View More Replies...
View more comments
#17

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) You're expected to just deal with a lot of things that girls would get help with.

tastehbacon , Kelly Sikkema Report

Tobias Rieper
Community Member
10 months ago

i agree like if your car breaks down and you call for roadside assistance lone women are given priority like as a guy were supposed to just wait and fend off attackers for hours

View More Replies...
View more comments
See Also on Bored Panda
#18

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Everything in your life is a competition. Every. F***ing. Thing.

smarmageddon , Randy Fath Report

Andy Acceber
Community Member
10 months ago

You need new friends, man.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#19

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Being called weak if I show any emotion.

ExoticStories , Ali Jouyandeh Report

Caro Caro
Community Member
10 months ago

That's not weak, that's what makes you a human being.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#20

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) All the societal pressure that on you to initiate, fix, pay, provide etc.

Neptune-Jr , rupixen.com Report

Marc
Community Member
10 months ago (edited)

One of my best friends, a very nice and humble man, did have this "problem" for almost 10 years of his life. It was mainly because his self-perception and confidence was all broken and wrong. He doesn't have a job where he earns a lot of money and doesn't own a house or anything fancy. Therefore he always thought he couldn't provide for a partner, let alone a family. He later suffered from depression because of that. It wasn't easy to help him, because he often met the wrong women, which verified his self-awareness. Long story short - it needed the right person, woman, to get him out of his corner. It took him almost 10 years. Seeing him today often makes me smile and happy, because he got so much confidence and is in peace with himself.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#21

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Being judged almost exclusively on one's financial stability, in an economy that makes financial stability very difficult to achieve.

green_meklar , Emil Kalibradov Report

Brendan Roberts
Community Member
10 months ago

I earn enough to pay the bills and look after my kids, with a little left over to add to our savings pot. This should feel like enough, but it doesn't. I feel like I should own a chalet in the Swiss Alps in order to be considered financially successful.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#22

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) The male stereotypes. Sometimes a guy needs to cry and just let stuff out. Or being strong and doing physical work isn't his thing.

BlacktheMew , David Billings Report

Vorknkx
Community Member
10 months ago

Indeed. I am not very strong and can't lift heavy stuff. It's a fact of life, and I can't just snap my fingers and suddenly become the Hulk.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#23

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Always being expected to make the first move towards the woman.

dailydonuts16 , Benjamin Ashton Report

Tobias Rieper
Community Member
10 months ago

for once i would like a woman that likes me to do that myself personally i am scared to make the first move in case i have mis read the signs like i think they are in to me but are just being friendly

View More Replies...
View more comments
#24

Living in fear of being labeled as a "creep" or "pervert" for trying to talk to a girl

Al-cicada Report

Anton Kider
Community Member
10 months ago

Or even playing with toddlers !!

View More Replies...
View more comments
#25

Used to be getting random b*ners at inappropriate times. Now, it's not being able to get a b*ner at appropriate times.

NastyLittleBagginses Report

Brendan Roberts
Community Member
10 months ago

We can all relate to this one. If only we had control of our penises!

View More Replies...
View more comments
#26

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Having to feel I have to stay quiet about the way I feel about my body

Michael_Scarn427 , Siora Photography Report

Viviane
Community Member
10 months ago

It can be a relief for some women to know that men worry about looks, too. My husband occasionally wishes he looked more muscular. Losing hair is another issue.

View more comments
#27

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Being the person to go check out the noise that just happened in a creepy place, to promptly be brutally murdered by some evil demon spirit

GiveMeYerBelt , Pawel Czerwinski Report

A girl
Community Member
10 months ago

While I appreciate that my husband will do this, I'm the one that hears it and I'm the one with a juggling club near my side of the bed. I lived alone a long time. I will maim to protect him.

View More Replies...
View more comments
See Also on Bored Panda
#28

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Probably the fact that we're expected to have the courage to approach women at bars or wherever else, which wouldn't be so intimidating if the perception of said flirting didn't depend entirely on how attractive they happen to find us. We're told "the worst thing she can do is say no" but it feels pretty s**tty when she and her friends straight up laugh as you walk away, or even worse, to your face. As someone fairly middle of the road in terms of looks, it's like "Oh boy, am I gonna have a fun conversation or are she and her friends gonna laugh at me, let's roll those dice!!!" Most of the women I talk to who decide they're not interested are polite about it and I appreciate those people, but some are just mean, and most of us guys aren't quite as emotionless as we're supposed to be. That stuff is a big feels bad.

GiacchinoFrost , Alex Voulgaris Report

Tobias Rieper
Community Member
10 months ago

also approaching a woman and being seen as a creep because they don't find you attractive

View More Replies...
View more comments
#29

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Baldness. Some can make it work for them, but most can't.

sd_glokta , Shivam Dewan Report

Ian Bartels
Community Member
10 months ago

I started shaving my head a few years ago. Best decision ever.

View More Replies...
View more comments
#30

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Trying to shave those damn hairs on your Adam’s apple without slicing your throat open

L4chie , Supply Report

KJ
Community Member
10 months ago

That's really not a hard thing to get around unless your shaving with a katana.

View More Replies...
View more comments

Note: this post originally had 61 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.