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When you’re sick or in pain, you go to the doctor expecting help. It’s a basic need, and seeking medical care shouldn’t require anything more than showing up and explaining what’s wrong. Yet for so many women, getting proper treatment means first having to prove they’re not overreacting or imagining things.
The numbers are staggering: 2 out of 3 women say they’ve experienced some form of medical misogyny. Whether it’s having serious conditions go undiagnosed for years, being told their symptoms are “normal,” or watching male patients receive better treatment for the same issues, women are facing a system that too often fails them.
And that’s just scratching the surface. Online, women have been opening up about the sexism they’ve encountered in healthcare, and their stories are genuinely outrageous. Read what they had to say below.
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#1
Seeing my mom's experience with Endometriosis really helped put into perspective how little the healthcare system cares about women. shes been in dehabilitating pain her whole life. shes been to doctors her whole life for this pain. about 5 years ago she learned about Endometriosis online and got the laparoscopy to diagnose. she had horrible endo all over most organs. she got it removed and wanted to get a hysterectomy. doctor said "what if you want kids in the future". she is a 40+ year old woman with 6 kids. she doesnt want more kids, she cant even have more kids! and they said if she wanted a hysterectomy to be paid for by insurance she had to let the Endometriosis grow until its bad enough to remove 3 times. THEN she can get a hysterectomy. she ended up saving for it herself and felt instant relief. shes a much happier person now. i feel horrible she had to go through 20 years of gaslighting and belittling from uneducated doctors. just for her to have to pay for a hysterectomy herself? crazy.
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#2
My mother needed a hysterectomy because she had a reproductive cancer. i'm not sure which one, but i think it was ovarian. doctors said no because she's young and my father might want another child. i'm one of four and my father had already gotten a vasectomy, mind you. my father is a good man and he chewed them out then sued them on her behalf. they threw out the case. she fought for nearly six years to find a doctor who would operate on her, even with his consent. not as crazy as some of these others but it still disturbs me
#3
This brought back a memory. when i was just starting my junior year of high school, i went to the doctor because i had blood in my urine (not yet diagnosed kidney stone). the doctor insisted it was chlamydia. when i was confused because my literal only symptom was a urine with red in it, they doubled down and said they knew I was on birth control so it had to be because i, like supposedly all teenage girls to this doctor, were being dishonest about having unprotected intercourse. nothing i said mattered. it took another horrifyingly painful week to get the STD panel back completely negative, and by that time i had already had to go to the ER to pass it anyway.
#4
When my beautiful auntie was in consulting with her oncologist as she was going through crazy treatment for hormonal cancer that had stemmed from her ovaries , she asked to exercise the option of a hysterectomy as she had her 4 kids already but was still only 38. He shrugged his shoulders and said ‘ well I want a Lamborghini and you want a hysterectomy, guess we can’t always get what we want’. As a nurse myself who went along for support, I thoroughly ripped him a new one and still scowl whenever I think of that weasel.
Blessings to Bernie though, you were a queen x.
#5
When my mom was delivering me, she, obviously, was in a lot of pain and screaming. One of the nurses actually slapped her and said "calm down. All women have babies. You're not special. Stop this." And that was so insane to me because like everyone in the room was a woman and this nurse actually had the audacity to slap my mom?
My dad and grandpa sued the hospital after that btw. We won the case.
#6
Went to the ER and was told "you're being dramatic, you're probably just dehydrated". i had a kidney infection.
#7
I had a severe bacterial infection in my lungs that wold give me very aggressive cough (like the kind that doesn't let you breathe).
The doctor refused to treat me because, according to him, the way I dressed was too revealing and exposing my chest to the cold weather was the reason why I got the cough. So I deserved it.
At the third appointment I took my grandma with me and she put the doctor back in his place so he eventually gave me some medication.
But the bacterial infection had gotten so bad that the cough became chronic and now I get it every year.
#8
After finding out my sister has PCOS I looked it up, noticed I had many of the symptoms and talked to my PCP about it. I asked if we could look into it, she asked me if I was trying for children. I told her no but wanted to be on top of my health. She told me don’t worry about it until I wanted to get pregnant.
#9
Ive been going deaf (it’s in my genes) and the ear doctor told me it was because I am a woman and we have too many thoughts to hear things….
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
I'd say, and you're a man, who can't think clearly because your d**k gets in the way.
#10
Went to the doctor for lower back pain, first appointment doctor asked if i was pregnant. took a year to find out i had 2 slipped discs.
Plentyofoomph 5 hours ago (edited)
...isn't asking a woman if she's pregnant a pretty standard question? It's important information to know
#11
I remember during my diagnosis process the doctor straight up refused to do most tests because "it's not possible to feel numbness from Lyme, it's probably just your periods" (Lyme can cause numbness and I'd like to see how "my periods" could cause numbness and paralysis in my HAND) it took my dad to yell at them to "do all the tests" for them to do it .
#12
Was told my joint pain was psychosomatic. Never mind that I could move my joints in ways that were horrifyingly unnatural to a normal person.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
To a lazy doctor, especially the druggies, everything is psychosomatic.
#13
My mom was born with an extra bone on her spinal column so when they tried to give her epidural when she was in labor with me, it didn’t work the first time because of the extra spinal bone and she tried to tell them and they refused to believe her. it apparently took a few hours of pain before they finally tried again.
my own experience is that i got diagnosed with autism ten years past the average age of diagnosis because my doctor and psychiatrist refused to believe that a girl could have both adhd and autism and i just wanted to get attention.
#14
I went in for a MRI referral for my KNEE and got asked if I thought my birth control was causing my knee issues ( the knee had dislocated).
He drank 2 whole monsters in the 20 minute appointment, asked me multiple times if I was sure I needed a referral, then referred me for an Xray instead of an MRI without telling me.
#15
Yeah my orthodontist (male, 60s) used to rub my thigh when I had appointments for my braces. My mum just sat in the room and watched him do it. Not sure who I'm more disgusted by tbh.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
My orthodontist and his hygienist talked about their affair right over my head.
#16
My Dad was doing the crossword as my Mom was in labor. The nurse asked her to be quieter so he could focus. Lmao.
#17
Well I mean the sole fact that the “father of gynecology” literally experimented on black women without their consent nor anesthesia is crazy to me.
One though that stands out is there was a peer reviewed study done in like 2013 I believe on endometriosis (yknow…something that is already severely under researched). They were given money to research the disease, and you know what they did? They measured the attractiveness level of the womens bodies with endo. They came to the conclusion that women with endometriosis had “better looking bodies”
Btw here’s the link to and about the study. Someone asked but it won’t let me reply to them. It was finally redacted in 2020.
Upstaged75 5 hours ago
I think I'm the exception to this study. 😂😂 Unless you're super attracted to potato-shaped women.
#18
My sister has an unknown sleep disorder. After waiting like a year for an appointment in KY, the Dr. didn’t even look at her chart or her, only said ‘this is a psychological issue, it’s anxiety. Go to a psychiatrist.”
If he LOOKED AT HER CHART, he’d learn that she has a psychiatrist, therapist, and is on anxiety meds. I don’t think I’ll forget my sister crying on my dad’s shoulder after, saying that she just wants to sleep.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
If I was dad I would have said, "hey, how about you do your job and read the chart, then you won't look like a complete moron?"
#19
I've suffered from migraines since I was a preteen. They often cause me nausea. At one point the migraines were so bad/frequent that I was vomiting every day, couldn't keep food down, etc.
I went to the doctor to ask for something to help with the nauseousness. What does the doctor tell me? "Well if you want to lose weight, we can put you on a diet plan... Blah blah." Didn't listen when I said I wasn't trying to lose weight, I wasn't forcing myself to throw up. I was ill.
I didn't get any medicine from that visit. Didn't get any help. I left the room in tears.
The worst part? The doctor was a woman. I was a healthy weight. But she saw a teenage girl throwing up and assumed eating disorder even despite being blatantly told otherwise. It took me seeing a male doctor for him to listen and easily give me medicine that helped.
It's not always men that are misogynistic. Women hurt women too. Women disregard women. And I think that's so sad.
Upstaged75 5 hours ago
I wrote a lot about this already, so see my post on endometriosis. I spent 10 years going to various female OBGYNs, who all belittled and insulted me. It was a male doctor who finally helped me. Any gender can be ignorant and biased.
#20
I went in with my mom and my doctor wouldn’t believe me when i told them my ankle was broken. it was purple. he told me to elevate it. a few days later, when it was already beginning to heal, i came in with my dad and suddenly it was a medical emergency.
#21
I'm not sure if this was misogyny or not (my mother is also black, and some doctors are just terrible), but when my mother was giving birth to me, she tore. when they were stitching her up, the pain relief (not sure what it's called) wore off. she told the doctors, but they didn't believe her until after they were done.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
Sadly there are vile white men out there that think black people don't feel pain. These same types exposed children with cerebral palsy to radiation to see what would happen.
#22
When my wife was in delivering our first born, after 1 hour of been at the hospital she told the nurse she was in a lot of pain and was ready to push. The nurse huffed and walked out and we heard her say to one of the other nurses. “We have a patient in here, it’s her first time and she’s not dealing with it very well” Within 5 minutes we were being rushed to the labour ward. (She was Unable to walk). As soon as we got in the room my wife stripped off, got on the bed and pushed. 20 minutes later my daughter was born.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
This is why many women don't want to give birth in the hospital. Nasty, impatient nurses and doctors.
#23
Two or three years ago I came in with my mom for severe rib pain, to the point I was sick and trying not to throw up while in class. I had the pain occasionally for about two months prior but throughout that week it became a constant. The doctor I went to said it was most likely SRS (slipping rib syndrome), but he also flat out said he didn’t want to actually diagnose me with it because I was a girl so because of that it’s just gas🧍
The next school year my mom called to try to get me a doctors note to get out of PE and swap to online so I wasn’t in so much pain from it, and the doctor goes “Nono I said I didn’t WANT to diagnose her with that so it should be gone now”, thank you American healthcare.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
Another example of why the US has the very worst health care system in the developed world. High cost, c**p outcomes.
#24
It didn't matter what I was going to the dr for, everything was because I was fat.
Doesn't matter that when I got down to 150lbs (I'm 5'10 and was working in a warehouse at the time so I was very muscled) my problems were the worst they ever had been, it was still because I was fat.
When I got not one, but two heart tests that lasted 24hr and then 48hr, I went back to the dr to return the monitor and they just told me, and I quote, "We saw something but we don't know what it is. But you're 23, you're probably fine!!!" Like thank you for making me pay several hundred dollars for you just shrug and say "meh idk".
I now know it was likely POTS symptoms. No way of knowing for sure since they didn't do anything else for me, even blood work, but yeah.
Bookworm 4 hours ago
This is when you refuse to pay, report them for fraud if they bill your insurance, get a second opinion, and report them to the appropriate authorities for medical neglect. They failed their duty of care which is a legal requirement. Either they treat you, refer you, or the problem has to be resolved. If you disagree that it's resolved second and third opinions.
#25
It's not that bad, but i remember my first gyno appointment. i was 12, having complaints about pain. the doctor (male) told me to "shave down there, its too hairy".
#26
Not my experience but that of my friend. She has some problems with her uterus that causes her pain and makes it way more likely that she’d have complications during childbirth, so she wants to get a hysterectomy to remove her uterus. It’s a completely voluntary procedure with little risk. Her doctor told her to “try to have some kids first” before he would agree to do the procedure. Until then, he flat out denied her request. This isn’t an uncommon experience either, with a lot of women saying that their doctors will either deny giving them the procedure until they have some children first, or saying that they need proof from the husband that he also doesn’t want children. It’s completely absurd and clearly sexist, but it continues to this day.
Meanwhile when I wanted a vasectomy, I got in with barely a question asked, and at a younger age than my friend did.
#27
I had a woman in my family give birth in a catholic hospital decades ago. She was crying and screaming in pain during labor, and the attending nuns told her that ,”This is God’s punishment for not keeping your legs closed!”
She was catholic, married, and the baby was very planned/wanted, not that it should even matter.
#28
Male midwife told me my frequent UTIs were because I wasn't cleaning myself properly in the shower (I actually had a growth in my bladder).
#29
When I was a baby, I had some serious gastrointestinal issues (screaming for hours after eating, refusing to eat, etc) and my mom was desperate to get help. First two doctors brushed her off as a mom who couldn't handle a crying baby. Third doctor told her if she couldn't deal with a crying baby, he would "gladly take the baby off her hands," because his wife had always wanted a girl.
Fourth doctor: turns out I had an enlarged bowel that left me seriously constipated after meals, which would require daily medicine to combat, AND I had bad acid reflux. Things got a lot better after that. The story still pisses off my mom to this day.
Took four pediatricians to figure that out because obviously, an incessantly crying baby is the fault of the mother, and not a sign of any underlying issues. This was 2003.
#30
Came in for an ultrasound scan in awful pains & 40 degree fever, suspected appendicitis. Was asked if there was a chance I was pregnant. I was 13. When they got told there was absolutely zero chance of that, the doctor asked if it could be psychological. I HAD 40 DEGREE FEVER, THAT DEFINITELY WASNT PSYCHOLOGICAL!
When I was 12 or 11, I started getting my period and it was immediately extremely painful. Like, passing out, throwing up, no pills working and not being able to move properly extreme painful. I had to go to three obgyns just so someone would look into it, because apparently I looked fine (the first two didn’t do any tests), and I was “probably just overreacting” as I wasn’t used to it.
#31
Having to explain to my boyfriend that we can't go to the E.R/urgent care/whatever even though I'm puking from severe menstrual cramps.
"babe, they'll give you something stronger than pamprin for this"
cue me, hormonally enraged, explaining to him that the most I'll get is a Tylenol.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
...and they'll tell you that you're a horrible person for wasting their time on your tiny cramps and call you a d**g seeker.
#32
When I was 14, I missed 2 periods. As a trans guy? Euphoric. But as a 14, still a virgin, and having cramps with nothing still perceived as a girl? Wasn't good. The doctor did not belive me for one second. He called me a liar while my mum was out the room going to get my little sister. I never told her but it still scares me. Still pre-T, still missing periods and throwing up every other day due to the other symptoms that have developed, (and still a virigin) terrified of gynecologists. I hate going, even if it's just to talk.
#33
I don't know if that counts but when I was in my teens, my periods started being more and more painful. They hurt so bad I was literally sick and needed medicine to even keep food down because it hurt too much and made me way too nauseous.
My doctor, who has known me since I was a kid, always said that I was "listening to myself too much". My mom was told to get over it when she was a child (by her own parents) and so believed the doctor. But I still felt horrible while having them.
Fast forward but one day, my mom made me go to the doctor while I was having "a crisis" (sick, pale, looking not ok at all). He told her that she shouldn't have and finally saw that yeah, maybe it was not normal at all! After exams, yep, endometriosis. I'm taking the pill and couldn't be better.
Going to also add that I tried to change pills with a new gynecologist (a man) to completely stop my periods (I hate them, I don't know why but they genuinely make me feel mentally....like bleurgh. Just a general feeling of bleurgh. Can't describe it in a better way than I feel like a mop. So I prefer to stop them fully) He was half-nice, acting like he was bothered when he was late and when I couldn't answer some questions super precisely. (I'm 24, was 23 at the time, but genuinely bad with dates or precise information that I didn't note somewhere) When I said that I was diagnosed with endometriosis, he just said to me that "Yeah everyone is diagnosed with this now" and basically that "It hurts when you're on your period". New pill prescribed and guess what? I had the strongest pain since a while and period coming back even if I was supposed to skip them according to the pill. (2 times in a single month, can excuse one for adjusting but the second.....yeaaaah- Especially when the pain made me wake up at night two separate times because of how strong it was).
Went back on my old pill and still on it.
Upstaged75 5 hours ago
It took me until my late 40's to find a pill that worked for my endo. I had tried every option at that point (pills, Depo shots, Mirena, etc.) and had just given up. My GYN had some samples of a new Progestin-only birth control she had recently received and it changed my life. So thank you to the makers of Slynd! 😊
#34
A female EMT telling me, a female patient, at ~11yo when I passed out at a McDonald’s bc I was on my period, “if you want attention this is a bad way to get it”
I was in the ambulance alone.
#35
Horrific periods from the age of 11, to the point I was vomiting and passing out because of the pain. They were lasting up to 3 weeks at a time & I was losing massive clots. I was told they'd sort themselves out after I'd had a baby. I WAS 11 YEARS OLD!!!!!!!!!
#36
I was told I'd be in "absolutely excruciating pain" if bile was leaking into my abdomen after my gallbladder had been accidentally removed. Turns out that roughly 1.5L of bile per day was leaking into my abdomen and I *was* in excruciating pain. They just didn't believe me. 🙄
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
It funny when i talk about wanting euthanasia if I ever got cancer, my sister, who is a nurse, likes to say, "oh they'll treat your pain" and I say "they don't do it now, why would I believe they'll do it then?
#37
Male gyno telling me I wasn't in anywhere near the amount of pain I was claiming during a pap smear. Couldn't walk back to my car afterwards
#38
The staff for the operation tried to convince her against getting her uterus removed. Like actively calling her wrong for doing it. These people should have known that she had CANCER in said uterus! They were more concerned about future husbands. Hella creepy.
#39
Being in severe pain but having my family tell me to get.? over it because everyone has period pain and it wasn't worth taking me to the Dr over period pain. Went to the Dr once I became an adult. Took a few appoints but found out I have endometriosis. At least now I have what I need for managing it.
Upstaged75 5 hours ago
A few appointments is a miracle. For most women it takes at least 5 to 10 years or more.
#40
I had gotten my wisdom teeth removed and went to the dentist to check how they were healing. He told me to open my mouth and I did and he stood there for a minute and then goes “wow you can open your mouth wider than I can and I haven’t had surgery” with a weird smile. I told my mom how it made me uncomfortable after and she got mad at me because “it was nothing.”.
#41
My mom had me at 17. She was a child. She told me it was hard. It was also hard meeting people years later including her doctors looking at me when I was 17 and saying “glad to see you didn’t end up like your mom”
It hurts. It’s gross. My mom is mentally ill but she is an amazing mother who did the best with the life she was dealt.
#42
My mum was told she couldn't be depressed because she's a woman.
#43
Being told I need to have children because I have a high pain tolerance when getting my teeth deep cleaned (??????) still don’t understand the concepts and how they aligned.
#44
At hospital an hour after my waters broke and my contractions started. I was repeatedly told to stop making a fuss and told I was wasting time when women needed help. Left for another hour until my partner lost his temper. I was finally examined and I was fully dilated.
Kate Johnson 5 hours ago
More nasty L&D nurses. This is why women don't want to give birth in the hospital.
#45
I had a mastectomy because of breast cancer. I was reconstructed with my own tissue (tram flap). I went to my gynecologist for my anual check and he said :I won’t check that, because it is no longer a breast. I never felt amputated until that day.
#46
After childbirth, my feet were severely swollen. My gynae dismissed it as a side effect of the epidural. When I was discharged, I expressed concern about how swollen they were and was told to elevate my feet. Seven days later, I was admitted to hospital in heart failure.
#47
Being told my headaches were caused by stress and denied an MRI for months - only to find out my brain was being pushed out the back of my skull and I needed emergency surgery.
#48
Being drained and tired was just because of my cycle and hormone fluctuations and refused prescription pain medication. Lol it was Lupus and RA
#49
Heard of "husband stich" after giving birth, with the approval of the husband not the woman herself.
#50
This one's less bad than some of the others that have been mentioned, but the last time I went to get my birth control prescription renewed, my regular doctor (a woman) was unavailable and her replacement/substitute was a young male doctor who only recently started working there.
When he was writing up the prescription, he started mansplaining to me in a pretty infantilizing tone how I should take the birth control, when I should take it, etc. I've been taking birth control for half a decade and this specific brand of birth control for like 3 years now.
Scarlett O'Hara's Ghost 4 hours ago
He's a new Dr. Though he understands bc he's unfamiliar with the practical aspects of it. He's me to this job and it's the first time he's seen you. He's charting requirements are very strict and since medical records are legal documents, he can't say he explained everything on his check list to you if he hasn't. His tone was more likely due to the fact he knew he sounded ridiculous but had to say it all anyway. Like back in the day when the airlines used to ask you if anyone unknown to you had packed your bags or if you left your bags with strangers?
#51
When i was 17 i went to the ER for severe chest pain. The doctor was on his phone the whole time during an ultrasound of my heart. Proceeded to tell me my heart is still developing and that I'm just a teenage girl n I'm fine.
Went to another doctor and found out I have tachycardia and other issues. I have to take medication daily for my heart to work properly and to not overwork itself.
#52
I was in grade 5. The Optomitrist talked about how pretty I was, said that all the boys must be breaking down my door. He went to his desk, got a quarter and put it in my tiny hand. He said, “Call me when you’re 18.” This was in front of my boomer mother who saw nothing wrong
#53
Insurance covered half my procedure - called it “maternity” because it involved my reproductive organs. Men access full cover for their reproductive organs no questions, no limitations, nothing … under the same scheme
#54
I had this weird thing happening where my chest was moving up and down uncontrollably from around my sternum. It was bad enough I couldn't talk properly. My mom took me to the ER and the doctor pulled my mother to the side and told her I was faking it for attention. No diagnosis
#55
When my mom was giving birth to me, the doctor left the hospital to have dinner with his family and my mom had to hold me in for multiple hours because the nurses weren’t allowed to conduct the birth. No other doctors were available either. It’s so ridiculous that a women was currently giving birth and he chose to leave 😐.
Upstaged75 5 hours ago
Is it really possible to "hold it in" if the baby is ready to come out??? I didn't think so.
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What do you think ?
Bookworm 4 hours ago
Unfortunately you have to advocate for yourself/loved ones. Read your patient bill of rights. Know your insurance's process for appeals if something is denied. If you call they have to advise you what your appeal options are. Know what duty of care is and your right to second and third opinions. You have to educate yourself. And make sure any bill is itemized and you did actually receive what you're being charged for.
Jesse 20 minutes ago
My own mother locked up the ibuprofen when I got my period because there was no possible way I could be in pain from cramps when she wasn't. Then I nearly collapsed in the lift on my way home. Went to the doctor, who wrote me a referral for an endometriosis scan at my gynaecologist. I did not have endo, but the gyn prescribed me birth control and I've never felt better after taking it.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 4 hours ago
Had this affect me too. Was told I couldn't possibly qualify for ADHD screening because I was too articulate, and dressed nicely.
Bookworm 4 hours ago
Unfortunately you have to advocate for yourself/loved ones. Read your patient bill of rights. Know your insurance's process for appeals if something is denied. If you call they have to advise you what your appeal options are. Know what duty of care is and your right to second and third opinions. You have to educate yourself. And make sure any bill is itemized and you did actually receive what you're being charged for.
Jesse 20 minutes ago
My own mother locked up the ibuprofen when I got my period because there was no possible way I could be in pain from cramps when she wasn't. Then I nearly collapsed in the lift on my way home. Went to the doctor, who wrote me a referral for an endometriosis scan at my gynaecologist. I did not have endo, but the gyn prescribed me birth control and I've never felt better after taking it.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 4 hours ago
Had this affect me too. Was told I couldn't possibly qualify for ADHD screening because I was too articulate, and dressed nicely.
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