“I’m Straight”: Husband’s Religious Awakening Leads To Sudden Revelation, Marriage Falls Apart

Reddit user ThrowRA_drag thought he knew his husband. But lately, something had been off. What started as a shared journey of faith soon took an unexpected turn, with his partner becoming increasingly devoted to a new church and adopting beliefs that seemed unfamiliar—alarming, even. As their once-happy marriage shifted to a more confrontational state (which the Redditor never anticipated), he found himself questioning everything and ultimately discovered that his husband no longer considered himself gay.

This man was happily married, and life with his husband was great

Two men in a garden, holding hands and appearing contemplative about gay marriage and personal beliefs.

Image credits:  In Lieu & In View Photography / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

But as his partner began to discover religion, things started to change

Text about a man's reflection on his gay marriage amid his husband's recent revelation.

Text discussing a man's experience with his Christian faith and his husband's agnostic beliefs.

Text excerpt expressing struggle with religious identity and impact of church on gay marriage beliefs.

Man praying in church pew, holding rosary, reflecting on gay marriage and faith.

Image credits:  Nina Zeynep Güler / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Text of a person's experience with a partner's increased church attendance affecting gay marriage views.

Text discusses harmful rhetoric about LGBTQ+ and drag queens in context of church and gay marriage beliefs.

A person typing on a laptop at a desk with a blurred background, focused on writing about gay marriage and religion.

Image credits: Burst / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Text revealing a man's realization of sin through his new church affecting his gay marriage and communication issues.

Text about a man attending church, contemplating the impact of his new beliefs on his marriage.

Man on a phone call in his car, reflecting on changes in his life related to church and marriage.

Image credits: Vincent Wachowiak / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Text discussing the man's realization of gay marriage as sinful influenced by his church's view.

Text from a conversation discussing brunch and feelings about friends seeing them.

Text discussing realization of gay marriage as sinful after church influence.

Text screenshot discussing a pastor's comments on homosexuality and religious beliefs.

Text expressing frustration over a partner's homophobic beliefs regarding gay marriage.

A man on a sofa appears deep in thought, wearing a green shirt, symbolizing contemplation about his marriage and church beliefs.

Image credits: Alena Darmel / Pexel (not the actual photo)

Text exchange about a man's realization and ending of his gay marriage due to his church's influence.

Text about the struggle with ending a gay marriage due to church beliefs.

Image credits: ThrowRA_drag

We don’t know for sure what exactly forms our sexual orientations

Image credits: Nina Hill / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Telling someone to just stop being gay because it’s sinful isn’t how things really work.

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), current research and professional understanding suggest the core attractions that form the basis for adult sexual orientation typically emerge between middle childhood and early adolescence. These patterns of emotional, romantic, and sexual attraction can also arise without any prior sexual experience. People can be celibate and still know their sexual orientation, whether it’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, or heterosexual.

However, APA says there is no consensus among scientists about the exact reasons that an individual develops a heterosexual, bisexual, gay, or lesbian orientation.

Although much research has examined the possible genetic, hormonal, developmental, social, and cultural influences on sexual orientation, no findings have emerged that permit scientists to definitively conclude that sexual orientation is determined by any particular factor or factors.

Many think that it’s a mix of nature and nurture and that most people experience little or no sense of choice about their sexual orientation.

As his story went viral, the man joined the discussion in the comments

Reddit post discussing divorce after joining a church that views gay marriage as sinful.

Reddit conversation about religion and marriage beliefs, highlighting views on Christianity and Islam.

Reddit comments on a thread discussing a man's realization about gay marriage and church beliefs.

Text discussing changes in behavior and mental health concerns related to a gay marriage affected by church beliefs.

Text advice on personal safety regarding a husband influenced by anti-gay religious beliefs.

Online advice discussing security measures and staying with trusted friends.

Text from Reddit comments discussing gay marriage and religious beliefs.

Comment advising someone on ending a difficult relationship for personal well-being and love.

Comment about a man ending his gay marriage after church influences him to undergo conversion therapy.

Comment on gay marriage from man's new church discussion.

Text discussing a man's crisis with gay marriage influenced by church views.

Comment discussing religious influence on views of gay marriage.

Comment discussing a man's realization of sinfulness in gay marriage influenced by a new church.

Comment discussing politics versus faith in relation to a man's church beliefs about gay marriage.

Comment discussing church support for LGBT Christians.

Forum comment discussing radicalization effects and irreversible consequences.

Comment discussing a man's realization about his gay marriage being sinful after joining a new church.

Internalized homophobia is far-reaching and dangerous

Forcing heterosexuality on someone can lead them to develop internalized homophobia, which consists of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors arising from the belief that queerness is bad, wrong, sinful, and inferior to being straight.

Queer-inclusive clinical psychologist Dr. Bethany Cook says that, by definition, internalized homophobia can only be experienced by someone who is not heterosexual.

Internalized “phobias” arise when someone in a minority group internalizes society’s hatred toward them, she explains.

It often leads a person to punish themselves for having queer thoughts and feelings or to engage in addictive behaviors that distract from them.

Sometimes internalized homophobia also gives rise to external homophobia, which a lot of hate crimes stem from.

If, despite their attempts, the perpetrators experience same-sex attraction and cannot accept themselves for that, they can direct hatred and violence toward people who are openly LBGTQ+.

Ultimately, the man issued an update on the situation, and it sounded like he was starting to heal

Text from a man discussing his husband's decision influenced by church views on gay marriage being sinful.

Church involvement leading to end of marriage, shown through text conversation.

Text message about limited contact and a conversation on gay marriage and change.

Text discussing a man's realization about his gay marriage being sinful after joining a new church.

Text expressing frustration and disbelief about a man ending his gay marriage due to church beliefs.

Text describing a conversation about differing Bible verses and a change in relationship after joining a new church.

Text expressing realization about ending a gay marriage after church influence.

Text screenshot discussing the realization about a gay marriage being sinful, leading to its end.

Text expressing personal decision about ending a gay marriage for health and personal reasons.

Image credits: ThrowRA_drag

Man reflects on ending gay marriage due to church, finds new hobbies and support in friends during hard times.

Text discusses a man's conversations with his pastor about struggles, and finding comfort in restraint from rebound relationships.

Text discussing life changes and reflection after ending a gay marriage.

Text expressing frustration about past relationship issues, including gay marriage and bisexuality.

Text message expressing concern over privacy, mentions ending gay marriage as sinful.

Text on a white background discussing personal journal thoughts.

Image credits: ThrowRA_drag

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