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Hey Pandas, What’s Your Favorite (Joking) Conspiracy Theory? (Closed)
Post some fun conspiracy theories—nothing too serious, just looking for a laugh. Let's not get political or offensive with any of these. My favorite conspiracy theory is that we do not own the cats... they own us.
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#1
I can't believe no one has said this one. Walt Disney being frozen under the Pirates of the Caribbean ride in Disney World. Along with the theory that Disney called the movie "Frozen" was so if you looked up "Disney frozen" it would give you the movie instead.
Final score:
33points
Minecraft_Chicken (Submission author) 2 years ago (edited)
2 upvotes!? MOM I'M FAMOUS! Edit: I don't know if I got this many upvotes from the post or this comment, but if it was because of the comment, I hope you had a good laugh. 😂
RELATED:
#2
Recently, I've heard a theory that all these crazy climare activist - like those who throw soup at famous artworks or glue themselves to roads - are hired by those who benefit from conservative energy sources to make actual climate activist look unhinged by association. That way, they can effectively shut down all debate about climate situation and continue to pollute even though we're nearing the point of no return. I'm usually critical about conspiracies, but this one makes tons of sense to me.
Final score:
26points
#3
Birds aren't real. They've all been replaced by government drones and are part of state surveillance.
Final score:
25points
Jaden Yoder 2 years ago
I love that one as well. It's actually pretty funny reading all the details
#4
The earth is flat…Yeah , and sits on the backs of four elephants, who stand on the back of the Great A’Tuin.
Final score:
22points
#5
Modern Art is just a money laundering scheme for the uber rich and they think it's hilarious when some of us "poors" think s**ty color blocks are "inspired" or "genius."
Final score:
19points
#7
Mobile homes attract tornadoes.
Final score:
17points
#8
Jews run the world. We quite obviously do not. But we do have Jewish space lazers though 😉
Final score:
14points
#9
At the northpole there is a polar fortress. And living in there are Elvis Presley, Falco, Fidel Castro, Michael Jackson, and Adolf H playing poker all day.
Final score:
11points
Apatheist Account2 2 years ago
The latter would be approaching his 135th birthday next month...not overly likely.
#11
All books with real-world settings are real, or going to happen, especially the ones with reasons why we wouldn't know what's going on like Rick Riordan's or Brandon Sanderson's books.
Final score:
10points
Stormblessed 2 years ago
By referring to Brandon Sanderson's books, you're not talking about any of the Cosmere books, right? because those aren't set on Earth. Skyward is related, though.
#12
The Illuminati controls the earth, and they sometimes do stuff like put it in the freezer (so we get the ice age) and play dodgeball with it (earthquakes).
Final score:
9points
#13
Ulta leftist Nazi cannibals vaccinate my potting soil. (with adrenochrome of lizard people)
Final score:
9points
ninjaTrashPandaBoom 2 years ago
"I was right in the middle of a f*cking reptile zoo, and somebody was giving booze to these goddamn things. Won't be long now before they tear us to shreds." -Raoul Duke
#14
"Dad, how can you hate "The Colonel"?"..."Because he puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes ya crave it fortnightly, smartass!"
Final score:
9points
#15
Paul is Dead. Love The Beatles.
Final score:
9points
#16
The Eiffel Tower was built as a spy antenna to communicate with space aliens who were trading advanced technology in exchange for information about human society. France wanted to have another tall metal tower on the other side of the world to improve the communications. That's why they gave the Statue of Liberty to the United States.
Final score:
8points
#17
That there are pyramids on Antarctica that were made by humans
Final score:
7points
#18
Black cats are bad luck. *eyeroll*
Final score:
7points
UpQuarkDownQuark (he/him) 2 years ago
Black cats are the best! My black kitty Milo was the love of my life.
#19
The electronic transistor was developed from technology found in the “alleged” UFO debris found near Roswell, New Mexico. The debris was found in June 1947. The first transistor was demonstrated just six months later in December 1947.
Final score:
7points
#20
The five permanent members of the United Nations Security Council are the five largest weapons manufacturers on the planet.
Final score:
6points
#21
In the late 30s Nazi Germany organized an expedition to Antarctica. They claimed part of it, called it New Swabia, and tried to set up a whaling station. There is a theory that several high up Nazi leaders and elite units of the SS evacuated to Antarctica after the war. There is allegedly a map created by the KGB of underwater U boat passages in the area. In addition to that, the theory claims that US Navy operation High Jump was actually a mission to fight said Nazis, which would explain the strangely high amount of casualties.
Final score:
5points
#22
How has no one added this yet?! "Some supporters of the QAnon conspiracy gathered in Dallas, as a theory circulated that John F. Kennedy Jr., who has been dead for more than 20 years, would reappear and announce that former President Trump will be reinstated as president."
Final score:
5points
#23
Avril Lavigne died and was replaced by a body double for... reasons?
Final score:
4points
Some Random Person 2 years ago
Read this one, even seems to be kinda legit. The Soviets (for real) had like dozens of doubles of popular singers and bands performing at different places at the same times, when real ines were either in rehab or dead
#24
That science isn't real. Yes, modern academia, government and systems are defiantly imperfect, and we should question everything. But accepted, peer reviewed science being just dismissed is a return to the dark ages.
Final score:
4points
#25
If u play the ouiji board you’ll summon demon elmo.
Final score:
4points
#26
I liked the one abt the show "the fresh prince of bel air" in the opening credits Will Smiths character gets into a fight and thats why his mom sends him to live with his uncle. The theory is that Will Smiths character dies and the whole show is him in heaven. When his mom visite she is actually visiting his grave.
Final score:
3points
#27
The government flew over the country with planes and dropped covid 19 particles so everyone could get sick and it would be easier for them to control you. The ideas seem people come up with
Final score:
3points
Rostit.. . 2 years ago
except we had trump and nothing was controlled and everything was a shitshow and now the economy is still clawing back from his ineptitude.
#28
The Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither a conspiracy or a theory!
Final score:
3points
#30
I heard a theory of why when you search "peppa pig house wallpaper" you find a miniature peppa in the window. The reason why she is there is due to the fact that she had cancer and daddy pig got tired of looking after her 24/7 so he chained her to her bed. 6 years later, the ACTUAL peppa was born. Creeeeepy.
Final score:
2points
#31
That Sasquatch / Bigfoot entities are actually the remnants of the Nephilim giants mentioned in the bible.
Final score:
2points
#32
The world you think you live in is actually a computer simulation. It is an experiment to find out how convincing virtual reality can be. You are the test subject. I wasn't supposed to tell you this. But I believe you have the right to know.
Final score:
2points
ninjaTrashPandaBoom 2 years ago
Philosophy can be a total mind f*ck...are we the dreamers or the dreamt illusions?
#33
Donald Trump is the love-child of Adolf Hitler and Ayn Rand.
Final score:
2points
#34
FLIES. ARE. ALIENS. They have no reason for 3000 eyes
Final score:
2points
#36
Edward de Vere the Earl of Oxford is the real Shakespeare. Anderson´s excellent book, y Any Other Name,"makes a compelling argument that the main author of the works was the Earl who studied the classics, owned the books that appear in the plays, and had an intimate knowledge of the court. De Vere´s life story matches up well with the plays - everything from being in debt to Venice merchants to having friends of the same names as the characters in the plays. The recognized Shakespeare was an elementary-school educated grain merchant who misspelled his name on his will, owned no books, never traveled outside of the country, and left his second best bed to his wife without any mention of the plays. Read the book before judging!
Final score:
1point
#37
The cute guy I met on my trip to Hawaii is a government spy or something. No way someone as gorgeous as him is actually into me 🤣
Final score:
1point
#38
Cats don't honestly care about ruling the world, as long as they get lots of tuna.
Final score:
1point
#39
My favorite one is that there’s not two Olsen twins, but it’s just one person that moves very fast.
Final score:
1point
#40
That Rebecca Black's "Friday" is about the assassination of JFK (don't hate me, I just think it's funny)
Final score:
1point
#41
my favorite conspiracy theory is that Long John Silvers is a money laundering front, but honestly, I unironically believe it. there are no cars out there whenever I see one, not that i do that often, and i don't even think any employees are in there half the time. it makes no physical sense for it to be anything else because you never see anybody go " boy i sure a hungry, i could go for some long john silvers right about now!" it's insane how much it makes sense
Final score:
0points
Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 2 years ago
Their fish is awful, in my opinion. Captain D's for me!
#42
That most private schools will eventually turn into a public school
Final score:
0points
#43
Vaccines make you magnetic (even to plastic) The sky is a dome built by "the government" to prevent people from seeing god. Jewish space lasers are causing wildfires. Satanic, cannibalistic, child molesters are operating a global child sex trafficking ring which conspired against Donald tRump.
Final score:
0points
#44
Donald Trump is not real. He is an AI construct, designed as publicity click bait for Trump Hotels at first, then becoming its own industry. This AI trap is now used to identify the extremely gullible personalities, so they can be targeted by organized crime cons later. A "Trump" sign on your lawn is known by the FBI to be a signal inviting cons to knock on the door and sell.. bibles, hats, and "secret investments"; all fake.
Final score:
0points
#45
Andy Kaufman faked his death and has been playing Donald Trump for the last ten years. The real Donald Trump plays golf all day. Meanwhile Andy Trump Kaufman and his comedy writing team are trapped because they believe this bit went this far.
Final score:
0points
#46
MrBeast's Networth is infinite because he gives away money but makes more money from those same videos, so technicaly he is worth Infinity dollars
Final score:
0points
Minecraftemery (he/him CisHet) 2 years ago
That's not really a theory, that's just true. But he mostly makes money off of merchandise and his chocolate brand.
What do you think ?
Famous Dako 2 years ago
Hello viewers, I'm Bryan Patrick, from 167 Madison 8400 Huntsville Arkansas, U.S. I want to quickly use this medium to share a testimony on how I was directed to a Legit and real Illuminati Elite Member who has transformed my life from grass to grace, from being poor to a rich man who can now boast of a healthy and wealthy life without stress or financial difficulties. I want to tell the worlds, that the illuminati (New World Order) Organization is real because i have see the benefit of being a member of the brotherhood, i have tried to join the illuminati organization so many times, i have been scammed a lot of money, but i did not give up because i know if i find the real illuminati master or agent, my life will be changed forever so i did not stop, i became so desperate in being a member online then I decided to contact a friend of mine in Germany, who recently became a member, we discussed about the issue and to our conclusion he told me about a man called Master James Albert, who
Famous Dako 2 years ago
Hello viewers, I'm Bryan Patrick, from 167 Madison 8400 Huntsville Arkansas, U.S. I want to quickly use this medium to share a testimony on how I was directed to a Legit and real Illuminati Elite Member who has transformed my life from grass to grace, from being poor to a rich man who can now boast of a healthy and wealthy life without stress or financial difficulties. I want to tell the worlds, that the illuminati (New World Order) Organization is real because i have see the benefit of being a member of the brotherhood, i have tried to join the illuminati organization so many times, i have been scammed a lot of money, but i did not give up because i know if i find the real illuminati master or agent, my life will be changed forever so i did not stop, i became so desperate in being a member online then I decided to contact a friend of mine in Germany, who recently became a member, we discussed about the issue and to our conclusion he told me about a man called Master James Albert, who
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