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I bet we've all been home after a long day, spaced out, when suddenly, our entire life seems like a lie. If you've been feeling sad, or you simply want to enjoy some of your fellow pandas' weird or random thoughts, then you've come to the right place!
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#1
If we don't feel air around us, then do fish think they are floating if they can't feel water?
Final score:
15points
Sooploosh MacSchnibble 1 year ago
They dont think they're floating bc its not smthn they would think abt. but yes they likely dont feel the water around them and they also likely dont see it, but would feel air and also see air around them if u take em out of the water
RELATED:
#2
Why are math problems on tests so odd? they all be like "If Tommy practices for 2 days to become a wizard, but he is 10 minutes late to the bus which is going at 10 miles per hour, then how many cupkakes can Tommy buy using a human soul? Round to the nearest mass of the sun."
Final score:
13points
Daniel Atkins 1 year ago
Why do we have to find out how much fruit our friends have? It is like you made them mad and they only the answer that will make you do algebra. Bill has twice as much as Sue plus three, but Joe has a third a many as Sue - pi so solve that sucker.
TheElementalGod️️ (He/him) (Submission author) 1 year ago (edited)
Bill has no fruits be cause he at them all. Now Bill found out that I poisoned the fruits. Bill is dead. Sue collects the life insurance.
Load More Replies... #3
Suppose you are a fish that just hatched. How do you figure out which other fish you should swim with (school of fish) when you can't really see what you look like?
Final score:
11points
#4
Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.
Final score:
11points
#5
If the afterlife is so wonderful, why do we have to muck about on Earth for 70-odd years? Why can't we just live in the afterlife from the beginning?
Final score:
6points
Lydsylou (she/her) 1 year ago
Maybe we are living in the afterlife and it just isn't that great
Lene 1 year ago
I think it's the same with my kids and their grandparents: on a daily basis the kids tell us that they miss their grandparents and when they've just had a sleepover there they don't want to go home. They think that it's so much fun at the grandparents because they get all the candy and there is so much fun stuff to play with. They look 100% puzzled when I tell them that if they actually lived at grandparents' place it would get as boring and dull as it is at home with mom and dad. And then mom and dad's place would be the best place evaaar. Lol
volcanic_larva3 1 year ago
god is testing us to see if were worthy of the heaven that is the afterlife.
Ashen Mccann (They/Them) 1 year ago
literally like if heavens real then why not go there right now-
#6
why does every star wars planet have the same centre of gravity
Final score:
5points
Stephanie Did It 1 year ago
For the same reason that all the Star Trek planets had the same degree of gravity and all their inhabitants spoke perfect English.
Cobalt One 1 year ago
Most Star Wars planets don’t have the same gravity. They also have a lot of different atmospheres that have varying amounts of oxygen, and most to nearly all planets in the galaxy aren’t habitable.
#7
I call them my after midnight thoughts and I've got a handful of them. Here's one: The Mandela effect where everyone who is 100% certain that the Monopoly guy used to have a monocle actually got it from Mr. Peanut - the mascot that closely resembles the Monopoly guy but indeed has a monocle. Look him up
Final score:
5points
#8
I'm pretty sure the Mortal Kombat theme is based on Scandinavian church music. It's a Finnish hymn
Final score:
5points
#9
We are all living in a memory. Think about, you do something like make a sandwich and eat it, it’s now just a memory even though it happened only minutes ago. Makes sense in my brain.
Final score:
5points
#10
You cannot ask Rick Astley for the movie Up, because he cannot give up, but he also cannot let you down, thus creating the Astley paradox.
Final score:
5points
#11
I have a couple good ones: ———————————————— - if you tend for chickens, doesn’t that make you a chicken tender? - birthday presents are technically just rewards for not dying that year. - why are prisoners given food and water, but homeless people aren’t? - what was the first gut to milk a cow trying to do? - isn’t an octopus just a wet spider? (The last one my freind told me lol🤣)
Final score:
5points
Sooploosh MacSchnibble 1 year ago
I think Sea Spiders (which are not real spiders but still arachnids) would be a better candidate for wet spiders. Actually, Diving Spiders (spiders that dive in the water to catch dragonfly nymphs, tadpoles, and even tiny fish (e.g. minnows). And also, they have been known to grow to an enormous size and eat all the people who go wading in the water even tho there are multiple signs everywhere telling u not to do that
Geoff Pearce 1 year ago
On birthdays - The day after your birthday is the most un-birthday day of the year. It gets progressively less so until its your birthday again. And on autocorrect - it's become my worst enema.
Howling-hyena174 (Submission author) 1 year ago
What was the first guy not gut sorry. Dang auto correct 😑
#12
Does the funeral home director take his kids aside when they are being ungrateful and say to them "Do you know how many people had to die so you can go to camp?"
Final score:
5points
#13
WHY IS IT COOK BACON AND BAKE COOKIES. WHY IS IT NOT COOK COOKIES AND BAKE BACON.
Final score:
4points
Kevin the Manager 1 year ago (edited)
I actually bake my bacon. I put it on wire racks in a roasting pan or on a cookie sheet (LOL) and bake it at 350-375 degrees. Comes out perfectly crispy with all the grease collected just beneath!
#14
Almost every time I think I have lost weight it turns out I haven't really lost it at all. It's just sitting there, in the fridge and cupboard, waiting for me to find it again.
Final score:
4points
#15
Are you the original you? Each and every cell in your body eventually gets replaced (including brain cells) so how do you know you’re the same person? And if you took those cells that were shed over the course of 20 years and rebuilt them into a person, which one would be you?
Final score:
3points
ohjojo (you/your's) 1 year ago
I would be the one who isn't dusty and covered with crumbs from the floor
#16
Whats at the front of a traffic jam? I'm actually so confused bc how does a huge line of cars happen when we don't know what caused it?
Final score:
3points
Austin L 1 year ago
1 thing starts it and then it just bottle-necks until the addition of traffic slows enough that it's not noticeable anymore. In my area it's usually caused by rear-end collisions around rush-hour on the highways.
Daniel Atkins 1 year ago
People changing lanes erratically with no signal causing cars to slow down to avoid collisions and it just compounds.
Load More Replies...
Ali H M Salehuddin 1 year ago
Phantom traffic jams https://youtu.be/XlSuG3Zwsjs?si=yO5FBXGAJxrwJRaO
#17
The Uncanny Valley. Why are we scared of things that look almost, but not quite, human enough?
Final score:
3points
Sooploosh MacSchnibble 1 year ago
Its to keep u away from diseased ppl and dead bodies. Dead bodies can carry disease, but also it would mean danger is nearby.
#18
If sunlight kills vampires why don't they disintegrate at night, since the moon only reflects sunlight?
Final score:
2points
Sooploosh MacSchnibble 1 year ago
sunlight doesnt kill them and only is an inconvenience. The trope of sunlight killing vampires was created for the movie "Nosferatu" bc they made the titular vampire too strong and wanted a way to kill him for the movie.
A Wild Bean (they/them/any) 1 year ago
We must ask our resident vampire-expert-who-is-definitely-not-a-vampire *Fair Weather Rose summoning noises*
- Imp - (she/they/he) 1 year ago (edited)
*Fair Weather Rose summoning noises intensifies*
Load More Replies... #19
oh man I think I had this good one, but Ill start writing a few until I remember it - Life on Earth is soooo amazing. from the 20 nanometer Nanobes to the 10 square-kilometer Honey Fungus. There's so much of it and the way everything has evolved to have a place in its ecosystem is amazing - The water here is too hot but if I turn it down, the pressure will go down bc this shower handle is designed stupidly so that the temperature and water pressure are controlled by the same handle - God should have made me a jellyfish. Jellyfish have no brains. No anguish, fear, sorrow, or hatred. I wouldn't be aware of anything. All I'd do is float around until some Turtle eats me - Giant Squids are real. They seem almost fictional bc they're so rare and are often compared to monsters but they're real. cool! - Are animals aware of the fact that one day they will inevitably die? Im sorry, I couldnt remember the one I was thinking of. If I do, i'll post it in the replies
Final score:
2points
Stephanie Did It 1 year ago
We are real, but to Giant Squids we are almost fictional monsters based on a few rare sightings of humans.
#20
Shower thoughts are not really shower thoughts because no one actually thinks them in the shower... Instead they should be called midnight thoughts but that doesn't sound cool enough... (Fun fact- thought this one in the shower)
Final score:
2points
#21
if Johnny the orphan has two and a half friends and the friends get divorced who had more custody of the turtle and how many livers does Johnny have....in his basement
Final score:
1point
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