Haha this should be fun. Try to make it sound nothing like the actual job while still being accurate. Extra points if you can guess the job people are referring to. Good luck!

#1

make sure a flying thing doesn't turn into a not flying thing.

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Rae Reyn
Community Member
3 weeks ago

I know I prefer flying thing to continue being flying things at 50,000 feet.

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#2

You are forced to take care of like 30 children for little money which is basically like babysitting. You have to teach them while they stare at a wall, pass notes, talk, and sneak food. And by the end of the week you are ready to crack.

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Jette Wang Wahnon
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Primary school teacher....and I do feel your pain...

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#3

The chips are in aisle 3

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Real_Katsuki_Bakugou
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Supermarket or grocery store employee

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#4

Looking at nude corpses

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𝕁𝕖𝕟𝕟𝕪𝔹𝕖𝕖
Community Member
3 weeks ago

um I can't remember the actual name but aren't they people who figure out the cause of death?

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#5

Try to make it to Friday evening without crying and/or screaming.

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𝕁𝕖𝕟𝕟𝕪𝔹𝕖𝕖
Community Member
3 weeks ago

that sounds like every job ever

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#6

I help Pandas

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CAILIN FRITSCH
Community Member
3 weeks ago

zookeeper

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#7

Putting someone in more pain than they were previously to apparently make them feel better in the long run.

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WindyWolfe
Community Member
3 weeks ago

I'm guessing this is Doctor, or Nurse

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#8

Teach children and sometimes adults to hit each other, but in a safe way.

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3361449421
Community Member
3 weeks ago

karate trainer?

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#9

Purposely leaving out details as to not distress the public.

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Joey Sanchez
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Government worker

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#10

You take a thing and turn it into a better thing

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Max Thompson
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Engineer??

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#11

Stabbing people to health

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Sue Mullen Andersen
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Vaccinator?

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#12

they let karens in

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Rolie_polie&people
Community Member
3 weeks ago

WELL THAT SUCKS

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#13

Look at your computer so that people find entertainment

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Joey Sanchez
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Youtuber

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#14

i move wiggly light into your eyes and you like it

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A very angy gay
Community Member
3 weeks ago

no idea-

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#15

I stick sharp objects in you mouth and torture your mouth

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Real_Katsuki_Bakugou
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Dentist

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#16

Enter an unknown home, Stab a stranger, and leave with a souvenir.

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Sportsgal
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Psycho?

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#17

Trying to keep somebody alive or fixing something while knowing if you mess up even in the slightest way possible you might kill somebody.

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𝕁𝕖𝕟𝕟𝕪𝔹𝕖𝕖
Community Member
3 weeks ago

surgeon

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#18

Go to bed by 10

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it's Wednesday my dudes.
Community Member
3 weeks ago

child

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#19

Take a year planing for a single day by stressing everyone out and making them hate dresses and cake.

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A very angy gay
Community Member
3 weeks ago

wedding planner

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#20

After the kid tells me it hurts, I push on it harder and ask if it hurts.

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qwerty
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Pediatrician?

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#21

Up to 300 conversations in 8 hrs all while keeping a polite tone regardless if they are rude or not

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Sue Mullen Andersen
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Telephone Customer Service - I would be fired on my first day.

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#22

I give people drugs

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qwerty
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Pharmacist?

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#23

you slam the table with a hammer and decide, ether a person will go to a room or not

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qwerty
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Judge?

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#24

I give drugs to people then arrest them for taking said drugs

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Undercover DEA?

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#25

Giving people stuff that they will probably not like.

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Viviane
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Santa Claus? The guests at my wedding? My in-laws at Christmas? A messenger you'd like to shoot?

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#26

Imagine being a cop, except you are only assigned to a gated neighborhood and everyone that lives there is trying to kill you and you have to keep them safe with no weapons, no way out, no vehicle. Armed only with your wits a pen and maybe some pepper spray that doesn't do anything. And you also have to keep them alive and you alive and everyone around you alive. And if you're like me, on top of all of it you actually care about other human beings even if they treat you like dirt so you try to make sure they are mentally ok too but you're not a mental health professional. You are told to be security, mental health, banker, patrol, parent / guardian and with minimal pay.

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Sue Mullen Andersen
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Teacher?

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#27

When grow up I want to cut people open and mess with their insides :)

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Real_Katsuki_Bakugou
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Surgeon

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#28

you forced to shove food in a cardboard box and put a toy in the box and you dont even get to taste the food

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Real_Katsuki_Bakugou
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Fast food worker

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#29

Working for a CEO that was never originally their idea. You'll know what I'm talking about when you see the movie. It's called "The Founder." I hate that man

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#30

Being forced to sit in front of a computer all day working on stuff that we will never need irl for 8 hours trying to escape but can't.

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Luca Fenton
Community Member
3 weeks ago

you student

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#31

Instead of telling someone they're healthy, I give them a $500 bill with bad handwriting.

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Sportsgal
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Doctor...just $500? Lol

#32

Put people into vans and electrocute them until they reach a building with more of the same people.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Prison transport?

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#33

I was a "sh.t umbrella". I was paid to deal with sh.tty things and sh.tty people and sh.tty situations. I was a mayor's chief of staff.

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Community Member
3 weeks ago

The sentence "see that with my collaborator" still haunt me. That was like a sh.t catapult.

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#34

Legally cutting up dead bodies

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qwerty
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Coroner?

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#35

sitting on the couch helplessly watching your children make a mess and wait for them to go to bed so you can clean it and repeat this tomorow

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Sue Mullen Andersen
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Stay at home parent - SUPER hard job.

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#36

you make a fool of yourself on a raised platform in a place full of mildly poisoned people so they can laugh and get more poisoned.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Stand Up Comedian?

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#37

Try to get at least 'B's so i can have a bright future

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qwerty
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Student.

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#38

Human welcome mat

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Chenandoa
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Hostess

#39

Doing endless paperwork and subsisting on a diet of ramen and coffee so you can get the achievement of the first letter of the American lexicon.

College student. I'm not one....and now I want ramen.

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#40

Working for ego-maniacal rude and crude South Africans that take senior positions in companies. Their mentality is three fold;
1. I am better than you and will shout the loudest when I am always wrong, so it looks like I am right.
2. You will always do as I say, and do it NOW!
3. If you not do as I say, nor do you correct me then you will be rewarded with cringe-worthy ‘shout outs’ that put 1970s workplace straight back on the map.
Any company with links to SA, DO.NOT.GO.THERE.

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

I dont know but i know this - job or not i would have to shout back!!!

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#41

Make the workplace boring, people hide when you do walk throughs, enforce unpopular policies and procedures, and hold meetings to explain why they are important.

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Marion L
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Middle management

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#42

(I'm not old enough to have a job but-) Teaching tiny midgets stuff they don't need to know for when they're older.

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ThatOneCrazyFanGirl
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Teacher?

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#43

Extracting your fluids to run tests on them and never return them.

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ThatOneCrazyFanGirl
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Phlebotomist?

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#44

Writing lies, and selling those lies. Everyone knows they are lies. They like it.

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Newspaper reporter?

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#45

You have to look for books that the visitor describes as 'a blue cover', know how tho find a specific subject in 100.000 books, lend them to a stranger and hope you get them back in good condition.

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Librarian?

#46

Mixing stuff until your arm hurts, make precise measurements or else everything will explode, and smile while people criticize your work in an awful ways.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

The "explode" part is what's throwing me. :) Without that, I'm thinking a baker....but if you mean "explode" in a literal way, then maybe a chemist?

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#47

Make sure people get into vehicles which can shake them and turn them upside down which can make them throw up. Do this the whole day long.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Someone that runs the rides at the fair or carnival or theme park?

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#48

you wear new clothes and people look at you wear the clothes. some pictures of you will also be taken.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Model

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#49

leaving earth to get some "space "

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Alien?

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#50

Makes sure the adults dont kill the children theyre supposed to get paid for.

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HammerzToe
Community Member
3 weeks ago

What a sad job description. I couldn't work at a job like that but I admire anybody who can, it's gotta be tough!

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#51

Organize thin slices of trees on thick pieces of trees while shushing humans

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Librarian?

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#52

Hours of working hard to keep everyone calm, often while covered in bodily fluids. In the end, a new person enters the room stark naked and screaming, and everyone is elated!

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago

LOL, so good! Someone who delivers babies.

#53

a doorman/doorwoman

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

a doorman/doorwoman ?

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#54

middle level executive in a company who is responsible for liability management

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#55

Organizing, inventorying, and safely storing truck loads of dusty letters and documents which are several hundred years old so people can eventually access them.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Archivist?

#56

Teach people that are jobless for years basic everyday knowledge they heard from you half a year before (and still tend to ignore). Repeat again in about half a year, cause they refuse job offers that are more than 5 miles away from their current residence. ;_;

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Unemployment Office worker

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#57

Kiss babies/empty promises so I can fill my pockets with expenses & family/friends' with taxes

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Spittnimage
Community Member
3 weeks ago

politician

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#58

Organize books in the most gated of gated communities, try not to get involved in various fights because the weapons are makeshift and often smell but still have to break them up occasionally. Once have a community member tell you if he says don't come to work, DON'T COME TO WORK, before the promotion to book arranger.

Dad& Report

Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Librarian (or Library Assistant?) at a Prison?

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#59

You have to talk to people. Listen to people cuss you out. Crappy Team leaders.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Customer Service

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#60

You will be forced to be awake until 12AM like my mom and get little pay as 1 dollar it's so unfair though you have no kids or 1 kids it feels like your working for 600,000 kids you just wanna quit the job but there's gonna be no other job to accept you and even a teacher seems simple well, IN YOUR DREAMS. The kids go crazy keep saying "teacher teacher" got to handle all the kids like your the parent though your basically a "second parent" nah you ain't want that.

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Adoption parent?

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#61

You heat up food in a fancy way.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Chef?

#62

I am paid to take people out

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sylvantic
Community Member
3 weeks ago

uhhhh assasin? or escort.

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#63

They break into people's cars... and get paid for it

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Repo man (or person?)

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#64

Trying to get through said job until you leave it

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Disgruntled employee :)

#65

You stare at a screen all day pushing key combinations but when those keys don't work you dry slightly different combinations over and over until you find a combination that works. Then someone who makes more money than you sells what you made for profit and rarely gives you credit.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Computer Programmer!

#66

You teach children how to put their fingers in balls, then how to throw those balls right into 10 standing pins in hope to knock them down. And clean shared shoes.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Bowling Alley worker

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#67

you sit down for 8 hours a day and complain why your computers an idiot

yup, a programmer

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#68

the thing a karen always wants

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Bacony Cakes
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Essential oil?

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#69

My mother looks at dead people and guesses their name

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Homicide detective?

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#70

Human Welcome Mat

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Hostess?

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#71

I listen to people talk about horrible problems on one of the worst days of their life and decide whether their rights should be taken away.

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Lawyer?

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#72

Now Hiring. Must be willing to endure air conditioning in the winter, heating in the summer. Also must be able to accept that you will be developing bad knees, have multiple back injuries as well as frequent trips to the emergency room for stitches, exposure to deadly chemicals, the threat of heavy equipment injuries, lung problems from exposure to toxic gases. Finally be prepared to spend over $150,00 on tools during your career. Ask to speak to the hunched over guy with one eye.

Automobile repair technician.

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Automobile repair technician?

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#73

Keep animals asleep with drugs while another person fixes their insides

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

A vet?

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#74

You vividly hallucinate and create a scenario with completely made up people most of the time and then spend what could be years turning that scenario into words on a dead tree.

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Jennifer Welch
Community Member
3 weeks ago (edited)

Author!

#75

not exactly a job but you have a lot of work and do not get paid

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Billy The Kid
Community Member
3 weeks ago

Volunteer

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#76

Using knowledge for buildings on human and hope it works too.

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#77

haha number go brr. haha super fly thing goo blooooooooooosssssshhhhhhhooooommmmmmmmm. haha photo go brr

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#78

You literally chop people open sometimes but most of the time it helps them. Sometimes you chop off their arm or let and sometimes you pull a LIVING BEING out of them.

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David Zhou
Community Member
3 weeks ago

*gulp* doctor or surgeonist

#79

Instruct tiny chip to do things without moving

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Shell
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Programmer

#80

go to a weird building, get tortured by paper, go home, repeat

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Okay, I give up on this one. Please tell us!

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#81

Make promises to a bunch of guys in suits as to when the work will be done as they threaten you with unemployment unless you compress the timeline and budget to the breaking point, after which you go speak to the people that you need to perform tasks and try to cajole them into working unpaid overtime to complete them. Then you play "let"s not and say we did" with the suit guys and give them an after action report so they can berate you over what went wrong. And you get another assignment to add to the 5 or 6 you already have.

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Project manager?

#82

Take people's jobs with money and turn their lifelong dreams into garbage that nobody likes and then dispose of them after 3 years. Repeat until you run out of jobs to destroy.

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Wait, what? What is this?

#83

I push buttons for lazy people to help them make millions.

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#84

I make awful movies look good, at least for 30 seconds.

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Kirbi
Community Member
2 weeks ago (edited)

Someone who makes movie trailers?

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#85

they look into ur eyes so you can put something in front of them

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Marnie
Community Member
3 weeks ago

I can't guess this one!

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#86

Make vulnerable strangers get undressed before I give them drugs.

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#87

it's like playing Sims, but with no cheat codes and have to actually adhere to the laws of physics.

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#88

I give up my youth, happiness, free time, and money in exchange for an almost-daily amount of practically useless information and debt.

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago

College student?

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#89

I wipe noses, mouths, and bumps all day long

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#90

Convince people (usually children) who do not know how to swim to submerge themselves in water.

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Bacony Cakes
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Swimming instructor.

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#91

Have to answer every review with "I will certainly talk about this with my supervisor" Seriously I couldn't care less if you think the bed was to soft or to gard or the chair didn't fit or you didn't like the decor. No one cares.

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#92

Can you check in the back?

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#93

Oh I'm not buying it, I just wanted to see the sizes so I can order it online (probably from your competitor)

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Draco Malfoy
Community Member
2 weeks ago

sounds like a best buy customer haha

#94

Air traffic controller

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#95

I look after my nations treasures, and occasionally point visitors to toilets.

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Shell
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Museum guard

#96

I fix your errors and on top of that I even fix your stupidity when you click on that link from the Nigerian prince who has billions of dollars to smuggle out of his country. I won't fix that 30 day stay at a Zambian resort, free drinks, unlimited food and 24 hours of sunshine each day for less than $10 a day, though.

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#97

Oh I'm not buying it, I just wanted to see the sizes so I can order it online (probably from your competitor)

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Bacony Cakes
Community Member
2 weeks ago

repeat