Hey Pandas, Can You Give Me Some Advice?
I have 2 groups of friends: my mains- the ones i hang around with most and are like my best friends, and the siders: the ones who i only hang with because my mate who i walk to school with is their mate.
Now, my friend from the mains (let’s keep her anonymous and call her Melody). Melody told me that one girl from the siders (let’s call her Anna) was calling her a c*nt and saying she’s toxic when she really isn’t. she’s also tryna start fights w Melody according to the mains. Now, the girl i walk to school with (her name will now be Polly) agrees with Anna’s side of the story which is “Melody was being really bitchy and toxic to all my mates. she was trying to start fights and all so i say what’s true (that she’s a toxic c*nt) and she’s starting to pick fights with me with all her buddies like Sandra, Ali and Angela (all fake names) and i’m not up for it but i will defend myself for as long as possible” is what Anna said. Polly sides with her and me and Polly have been best friends since like 2011. AITA for trusting my mains (Melody, Sandra, Ali and Angela) over Anna and Polly just because my mains are a lot nicer to me?
Just a photo i took so i can ask the question.
I have 2 groups of friends: my mains- the ones i hang around with most and are like my best friends, and the siders: the ones who i only hang with because my mate who i walk to school with is their mate.
Now, my friend from the mains (let’s keep her anonymous and call her Melody). Melody told me that one girl from the siders (let’s call her Anna) was calling her a c*nt and saying she’s toxic when she really isn’t. she’s also tryna start fights w Melody according to the mains. Now, the girl i walk to school with (her name will now be Polly) agrees with Anna’s side of the story which is “Melody was being really bitchy and toxic to all my mates. she was trying to start fights and all so i say what’s true (that she’s a toxic c*nt) and she’s starting to pick fights with me with all her buddies like Sandra, Ali and Angela (all fake names) and i’m not up for it but i will defend myself for as long as possible” is what Anna said. Polly sides with her and me and Polly have been best friends since like 2011. AITA for trusting my mains (Melody, Sandra, Ali and Angela) over Anna and Polly just because my mains are a lot nicer to me?
Just a photo i took so i can ask the question.
(sorry, if my english is not that good) Ask an outsider what they have mentioned. Sometimes, being nice to you means nothing. There are fake friends, who will be nice to you to have a supporter. That makes them feel greater. This must not be the case, but it is possible, that your Mains are the toxic people. Observe, what they are doing und how they behave against others. I know, it is hard to mistrust friends (Mains or sides) because they may be no longer friends. But you seem to try to be a good human being for not willing to Support liars and misbehaviourists. I think that is a good Thing. Observe and reflect. Also your own Feelings.
There are three sides to every story, your main friends group, your side friends group and the truth. In saying that though you shouldn't need to take anyones side and if anyone tries to make you then they aren't a true friend. A true friend wouldn't make you choose who you should be friends with or who you should defend etc. It doesn't involve you so just stay out of it. There really is no need to involve yourself and possibly end up as a target yourself.
that makes sense foxxy. Thank you so much
Load More Replies... I would consider the future: how likely are you to maintain long term friendships with these ladies? I am not in touch with anyone I went to school with; my sister keeps up with lots of our childhood classmates. If you don't know more than you told, you don't *know* who to believe; I don't. That leaves intuition. Who do you *want* to believe? Would it matter if you choose wrong?
(sorry, if my english is not that good) Ask an outsider what they have mentioned. Sometimes, being nice to you means nothing. There are fake friends, who will be nice to you to have a supporter. That makes them feel greater. This must not be the case, but it is possible, that your Mains are the toxic people. Observe, what they are doing und how they behave against others. I know, it is hard to mistrust friends (Mains or sides) because they may be no longer friends. But you seem to try to be a good human being for not willing to Support liars and misbehaviourists. I think that is a good Thing. Observe and reflect. Also your own Feelings.
There are three sides to every story, your main friends group, your side friends group and the truth. In saying that though you shouldn't need to take anyones side and if anyone tries to make you then they aren't a true friend. A true friend wouldn't make you choose who you should be friends with or who you should defend etc. It doesn't involve you so just stay out of it. There really is no need to involve yourself and possibly end up as a target yourself.
that makes sense foxxy. Thank you so much
Load More Replies... I would consider the future: how likely are you to maintain long term friendships with these ladies? I am not in touch with anyone I went to school with; my sister keeps up with lots of our childhood classmates. If you don't know more than you told, you don't *know* who to believe; I don't. That leaves intuition. Who do you *want* to believe? Would it matter if you choose wrong?
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