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I recently have discovered I want my chest to be flat, but I like how feminine my face is, but I want my chest to be masculine? I like having long feminine hair and wearing softie makeup but I really hate having breasts? I want children too. Am I trans or something? I’m generally curious .

I don’t want to be a man, but I don’t want breasts what do I want.

Help.

#1

Like a lot of us, you just want to be free to be yourself... Not much help, I know, I've dealt with this type of stuff for over 40 yrs.... I like the internal me but hate this absurd meat mecha I'm forced to pilot through this world.... Find people who accept you as you, that's all I can say.... Find a tribe or community without judgment.... I dunno, it's hard to put into words, sorry...

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Emery Walters
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If it were me (I am trans FTM) I would look up gender therapists in my area and start seeing one; secondly I'd see if there are any gender or LGBT meetings at a nearby university, or attend or read online PFlag meetings and information. Asking here is a great start and best of luck to you. There are such people called 'nonbinary' or 'enbees' so you are not alone.

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#2

You could be one of those gender fluid types, or whatever one uses "they/them" pronouns.

If you don't like your breasts, have them reduced or removed. It may be a struggle finding a doctor who will do it if you're healthy (usually it's if you have cancer or whatever), but I bet there are others out there who feel the same way.

It's possible to be "flat" but still look feminine.

I agree with finding a support group. Find your "tribe", as a friend of mine likes to say.

Good luck in your journey and keep us posted! 🤗

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#3

Dress how you want, you'll figure yourself out later.

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#4

Maybe you’re non binary/demigirl or just feel feel uncomfortable having breasts, not everyone who has body dysmorphia is trans! There are lots of different binders you can get to have a flat chest if it makes you feel more comfortable in yourself 🙂

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#5

you dont have to label yourself. If people ask, say you dont label yourself, there's not an identity for everyone's feelings, its just your comfortability. Take me for example, I identify as non-binary, want to flatten my chest as well, have a style thats gender neutral, but not all nonbinary identifying people do that, some dont have top chest surgery, some have more feminine/masculine look. Honestly, it would be easier to not label anyone.

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#6

you're not trans. just sick of having boobs

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brucewilliams avatar
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Soooo sorry I typed this wrong. I promise thats not what I meant to say! Auto-correct!

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#7

Hmm I think on this you might be demigirl (feminine, she/they, mostly fem with masc choices/features) so you wouldn’t be a man, wouldn’t have breasts, and be feminine. Or you might be non-binary/gender-fluid with a somewhat feminine preference

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#8

If you don't know what you are, then you don't have to put a label on it. Use whatever pronouns you feel comfortable with and don't even bother labelling your gender right now if you're confused. I'd recommend taking some time to figure it out and decide what you feel like you are.

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#9

i recommend you try out pronouns online and irl if possible, so you can see at the very least what pronouns you prefer to use. in reality, the only important thing about knowing someone's GENDER is their pronouns. but I think you could be a demigirl or a femme nonbinary person. maybe even a trans femboy lol. just try out different pronouns and see what works for you. i recommend you think about other things too (but be careful not to overthink). how in particular does having breasts make you feel? does your voice sound like you? (note: the voice thing is hard because im a girl but i don't like my feminine speaking or singing voice i have experimented with he/him and 100% masculine appearance and it wasn't right for me. but now that i know I'm queer i feel a lot more comfortable not conforming to gender. i recommend you think about how and who you feel attraction to because while gender and attraction are not the same thing, they are closely related. ask also if you connect to drag culture in any way. just give it some thought, but not so much thought that you forget to live and just be yourself. its also entirely possible that you just hate having boobs because they're annoying and not very good for anything lol. also ask whether you might be happier with a "kitty" or a "male chicken" (hint hint). sorry for the essay, just got a lot of experience in the area of gender questioning lmao

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#10

I don’t think ur trans, it’s perfectly fine to want to have a flat chest. U can dress how u want and look how u want and ur beautiful either way. 💕

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#11

I feel ya. I'm a 55 y/o woman. I was always flat chested growing up and felt insecure over it. Once they started to develop and I had kids they went from discrete to a C cup. For years I have dreamed of being small enough to not have to wear a bra again.

If you have the insurance or means have breast reduction surgery. The world is full of people that get cosmetic surgery to feel better about themselves.

You are you. No special pronouns needed.

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#12

Don't worry about finding the right label for now, focus on finding and being you. The right label will find you when you are ready.

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#13

You don't have to choose a label if you don't want to. However you exist, that is enough. But if you would like a label, you could be gender fluid or non-binary.However you choose to define yourself is absolutely perfect.

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#14

You can try being just “you” for a while, without any labels and whoever wants to stick their nose in your business can honestly shut up. Like a lot of people have said, you can be gender fluid or non binary, but if you don’t want/like labels just be a girl, but who dresses and is more androgynous than just female/male.

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#15

I have trans friends and non binary friends so they suggest using a binder or trans tape

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