74 Of The Most Hilarious And Relatable Halloween Tweets

😂😂

That's a fair point. She should have hidden them.

I love this!

I love this guy. He says so much with just that look.

Sounds fair.

*clap clap*

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lame. i’ve literally never told a woman she should smile or heard a man say that to a woman

Pro move on both your parts.

👹😇

That's the Halloween spirit! 🎃

I saw a scorpion skeleton in the thrift shop but someone got to it before me. I snagged the bat though

on my way...

Ingenious.

Oh my freaking god this is fantastic and horrific

In California, women wear skimpy nurse outfits or dress as Victoria Secret Angels. On the East Coast we're polar bears and oversized pumpkins for insulation.

🤣🤣🤣

Excellent!

Spider: Hello! Me: *flip flops it* Life is sad for the curious and friendly.

Centaur!

Well, there was that woman whose birth came on unexpectedly and the doctor delivered it while dressed as the Joker.

Are we not worried about poison and razor blades anymore? When I was a kid in the 80s, it was absolutely drilled into us that we were not to consume anything at all until it had been subjected to parental inspection. And no, my parents were not just taking the chance to sneak out a few of their favourites, I'm quite sure. They were genuinely afraid someone might have done something malicious.

I don't do halloween at all. Does that make me a bigger red flag?

Is that pronounced as Lackin?

2024? You're joking right?

I was running errands yesterday and Dollar General has Christmas decorations for sale. 😟

Hey! I'm wearing those right now! Oh...

haaaaaa

Dad tax. I remember the days. On most things I got.

He is adorable

😂😂😂

Well that's no fun

2026 - with their phones and their drones...

Homer Simpson: mmmm skin frosting.

*screams* DON'T SPRING THAT ON ME G*****N!

Did they? did they really?

No, it's vegetable, pumpkin and pea(nut)s

Actor Rip Torn, of course.

Ghostpunchers!

Qlusters

Those babies are utterly terrifying

This is a double. The other is at #2 at the time of commenting.

I was petrified...

I've never been in a haunted house. **Sobs in weird person**

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

That's when it goes on sale. If you don't mind the "fun size" portions, you can save a bundle and satisfy all of your glucose-fructose and carnauba wax needs until Christmas.

K**L IT WITH FIREEE

(Hint: It won't work)

Yes