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75 People Who Got Married And Then Learned Something They Definitely Wish They Knew Earlier
Marriage is a big step in any relationship. After all, committing to spending the rest of your life with someone isn’t a decision most people take lightly. That’s why couples spend plenty of time getting to know each other before tying the knot. From going on dates and meeting each other’s families to moving in together and getting engaged, there are usually quite a few milestones along the way.
But even after all that, there’s no guarantee you know absolutely everything about your partner. Redditors asked fellow users to share what they only found out about their spouses after saying “I do,” and there was no shortage of answers. From hilarious to heartbreaking, we’ve rounded up some of the most interesting ones. Scroll down to read them!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
A shockingly happy discovery: Some people come home from work in a pretty good mood, and don’t spend the entire evening complaining and moaning about work/their boss/their co-workers. I had no idea I could share a home with someone who smiled at the end of the day. And I could eventually raise kids with someone like that.
The home I grew up in led me to believe every adult comes home from work in a bad mood every day.
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#2
My wife can make balloon animals and I never knew it. One day were sitting at home with the kids and after I brought home the wrong type of balloons out of nowhere she twists up a dog, then a monkey.
#3
She does all bathroom activities with the door open and will carry on a conversation with me the entire time.
I prefer door closed bathroom visits. She will open the door and talk to me like I'm sitting on the couch while I'm deeply involved in a #2.
It's been 15 years. I lost the battle.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 15 hours ago
I grew up in a home where we weren't allowed to close any doors ever. If I was showering, I had to leave the bathroom door open, and my mom would sometimes just walk in and start doing her makeup or sit on the toilet to go to the bathroom. If I was going to the bathroom myself, she might walk in and just start talking to me (like OP's wife above.) I hated it as a kid. The one wonderful thing about the 3 years I lived with my now-ex is that I realized I could close the door to the bathroom if I wanted to XD
How long should two people be together before deciding to get married? Some couples are ready to say “I do” after just a few months, while others spend years dating before taking the next step.
Of course, there’s no universal timeline that works for everyone. Still, it’s interesting to see just how much the average length of a relationship before marriage can vary depending on where you live.
For example, according to The Knot, American couples who married in 2025 had dated for an average of three years before getting engaged. Meanwhile, a 2024 survey by British wedding planning platform Bridebook found that couples in the UK spent an average of 4.7 years together before getting engaged.
And that’s without counting the engagement itself, which can add another year or two before the wedding finally takes place.
#4
My husband folds his t-shirt Marie Kondo style and stores them in rainbow order. I love him so much.
#5
That some people are decent, kind folks.
Family isn't just blood.
Her mom (My MIL) loved me like a son, and when wife was out of town for a training week when I was sick, came over, cleaned house, fed me (I was so sick I was in bed for 2 days). Her brother helped too.
#6
He didn’t believe in life partners, he had already cheated on me before we got married, and he thought my family was rich because I grew up on the beach so he expected an inheritance.
Being divorced is so good, 10/10 recommend.
But marriage traditions look quite different in other parts of the globe. In India, for instance, arranged marriages remain common, meaning couples may have considerably less time to get acquainted beforehand.
According to data from the India Human Development Survey of 2011–2012, nearly 65% of surveyed married women had met their husbands only at or around the time of marriage. Just 11% reported having known their husbands for more than a year or since childhood.
So, does spending more time together before marriage actually increase your chances of staying happily married? There is some research suggesting that it might.
A study by economists at Emory University, involving more than 3,000 people who had been married, found that those who dated for at least three years before getting engaged were less likely to divorce than those who dated for less than a year.
However, this doesn’t necessarily mean that dating longer prevents divorce, as other factors could also explain why these couples were more likely to stay married.
#7
He skydived! My quiet, apparently unadventurous husband, who prefers reading and gardening to most other adventures, used to be a skydiver. He only quit because it got too expensive.
#8
He was lazy, didn't want to work, was physically violent and tried to blackmail my father. He was a total criminal but none of this showed until after we were married.
When I complained to his mother she said, "he's your problem now." That comment told me everything I needed to know. I left him and we were divorced two years later.
#9
I thought I knew him. We got married, had kids and shared countless experiences together. When our eldest child finally got the hang of riding their bike I was beyond pumped to hit the road and relive some of my childhood with them. And that's when my husband finally dropped his secret shame. He'd been hiding it from me, his children, his friends.. everyone. He can't ride a bike.
Interestingly, there’s also evidence that couples who spend very little time together before marriage can be just as happy.
A 2012 study published in Psychological Reports compared 28 people in arranged marriages with 30 in love-based marriages among Indian adults living in the United States. Researchers found no significant differences in their reported levels of marital satisfaction, love, or commitment.
Of course, the study was relatively small, but its findings suggest that the way a couple gets together doesn’t necessarily determine how happy they’ll be.
Ultimately, there’s no magic number of months or years that can tell you whether a marriage will succeed. Spending more time together can give couples a chance to understand each other’s habits and see how they handle difficult situations, but even decades of dating wouldn’t reveal absolutely everything about another person.
After all, we’re constantly learning and changing throughout our lives. Perhaps that’s part of what makes marriage so interesting: even after the wedding, there’s still plenty left to discover about the person you’ve chosen to spend your life with.
#10
That she smells amazing. Once she stopped wearing perfumes, and I could smell her natural scent, I became even more crazy for her. Similar with makeup vs. natural face.
#11
He told me he owned a cabin and was financially stable. He told me he didn’t have any debt besides his vehicle. I was planning on getting a camper for me and my kids and had money set aside to get something small. He already had a camper but it was too small for us to take the kids so he said he would sell his and use the money he got for it to go in on a bigger one with me. I found a bigger one and paid cash for it (with the little money I had) with the understanding that when he sold his, he would pay me half the cost and we would both own it 50-50. Finances mattered to me because I was going to lose my alimony and gain a house payment by marrying him. I knew he didn’t make a lot of money and that was okay, but I was not prepared to find out he lied to me.
After the wedding we went to the bank to refinance my house (I had to pay my ex his equity on the house) and found out that my new husband did not own a cabin, it was his aunts that he had been living in. He has 9k in credit card debt. His credit was in the 600’s so we couldn’t get a good rate on the mortgage, he owed more than his camper was worth, so he would never pay me the half he said he would go split the new one, and his car payment was almost $800 per month.
He said he didn’t tell me because he was embarrassed to be 48 years old and have nothing but debt and zero assets. I also found out he had stolen all of his moms pain meds for her back.
This was one of the most frightening times of my life.
8 hours ago
Fraud and deception are grounds for annulment. I'd be at a lawyer's so fast it would make his head spin.
#12
He cans vegetables. Ya'll. I married a man who cans vegetables.
I hit the jackpot.
#13
About to celebrate 2 months of marriage, so I'm still part of the newlywed club. My husband and I didn't live together until after we got married and I discovered his sleep talking...which happens almost every night. He's had full conversations with me thinking my name was Steve-o, yelled "two players now, who's going down," but my personal favorite is when he rolled over and said, "I just know it's gonna be a Happy Halloween soon."
Edit: Having a good laugh at people saying we should've lived together before we got married. This was based on personal faith-based beliefs that we feel strongly about. I married my best friend and we have made it through some of the best and worst of times in over two years of dating. We may not have done things how you would, but this was absolutely the best decision for us.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 15 hours ago
I hope OP's "faith" allows her to realize that it's okay for married people to sleep separately in order to preserve sleep hygiene and sleep health XD If her husband's sleep talking is loud/consistent enough that it wakes her up and/or keeps her awake, it's okay to sleep in separate rooms. Both people need good sleep.
#14
I literally only discovered this the moment we were married -- that he has a very romantic side.
All the time we were together before, I probably would have said I would have liked a little more traditional romance, but I appreciated how straightforward and pragmatic he was about other things and thought I can't have it both ways. I could add that he is a theoretical physicist who works with engineers, and he has the personality to match. He always said he thought marriage was essentially meaningless. Eventually, for external reasons, we decided to do it (I proposed to him, by the way, with a new watch). We threw together a cheap little ceremony in a few weeks to "get it over with" as we both put it.
He put on his suit, I put on my pretty dress, we had the officiant there (that I found on Yelp two weeks before) and got started. However, when it came time for the vows and the ring exchange, I suddenly found myself facing a very sentimental man, who was clearly deeply in love with me and overjoyed to be marrying me. After that, the same man who took years to feel comfortable holding my hand in public for even five minutes was hugging and kissing me in front of everyone at every moment he could during the ceremony. Then he wanted to celebrate every "week-iversary" then every "month-iversary" with romantic dinners and having the same cake we had at our wedding. He starts celebrating at 12:01 AM on our anniversaries. He gazes lovingly at his wedding ring and always wants me to do the Wonder Twins thing with him by clicking our rings together. Who'd a thunk it?
#15
He started changing a lot of little things that I had mentioned while we were dating/early on when we first moved in together. It's stupid stuff, but one of the main ones was how he poured his milk for his cereal. He used to fill the bowl half way with milk, then pour in the cereal, and then take the 1lb bag of sugar and pour until it was a good sized pile.
While we were dating I complained for about a month about how he'd finish his cereal and leave a bowl almost half way full of milk and sugar in the sink; it's extremely wasteful and we were going through A LOT of milk and sugar just to have it be poured down the drain. After marriage he started pouring his cereal first, then sugar, then milk and when he's done his bowl is usually empty or almost empty.
He stopped throwing his clothes everywhere. He started leaving his projects more contained rather than all over the place. He stopped smoking in the house and leaving his ash trays on the floor; this one I think mainly changed because I had to have surgery and when I came out I would literally throw up at the smell of cigarettes.
There's other things I can't think of right now that I brought up for probably the first year we lived together; we'll be celebrating 14 years next month, but it shocked me that he changed those things after marriage because I married him expecting that to just be my life with him and although those were annoying things he did, they were far from deal breakers.
GenuineJen 9 hours ago
Positive changes! I love that OP saw these changes too, and was prepared to love their spouse with those habits already in place.
#16
She farts louder than me.
#17
That he is a very smart man and can teach me a lot about life and about myself.
In many ways, I made sure that getting married was a good next step in our relationship. He's my favorite person in the world, I love being in our love every day (even when he pisses me off).
#19
He hates grocery shopping, like would rather clean the toilet than pick up more than 2 things at the grocery store. It kind of works though, because I hate cleaning the bathroom.
#20
My wife can speak french. We are on vacation last February in Papeete, Tahiti French Polynesia. My wife starts talking french to everyone talking french. WE'VE BEEN MARRIED 25 YEARS!
#21
Before we got married I loved how sarcastic she was. After we got married I realized she wasn't sarcastic at all, just mean. We're still happily married, though.
#22
My sister found out 3 yrs into her relationship that her husband used to be an NFL wide receiver for the Green Bay Packers. She thought he just played beer league football casually with his friends.
They were sitting around watching a football game on tv and he knew really specific details about certain players. She was asked him how he knew all this and he said he was pretty good friends with him. The conversation kept going and he finally admitted to playing in the NFL with him.
His family would never talk about it either. She would be over at his house and his sister told her that his college games were "pretty fun" to go to. She never brought up that he was the star wide receiver playing in front of 70,000 people.
#23
About a week after we got married I learned he’d been cheating on me for our entire relationship up until when I found out. So that was fun.
#24
Her parents ruined her credit buying Christmas gifts with her credit. They maxed everything out and never paid for anything.
Then when she confronted them, they told her she accepted the Christmas presents. As if committing identity theft was somehow her fault.
So there I was with a newborn on the way married into a family that literally victimized their daughter and gave her next to zero financial education.
She bought a car at 30% interest, she had credit so bad we couldn’t rent. She took a payday loan to buy a dog, that she ended up pawning off on her parents. She had pet ferrets she didn’t take care of either.
Smfh… red flags everywhere. But I was already invested in a sinking ship.
She ended up getting a pretty good inheritance several years later. Which instead of buying a house, she used to divorce me, travel, party, and not work for several years.
So I’m a little bitter, especially because she feels entitled to child support from me, after financially supporting her, our kids, and paying down her student debt for years.
I had no idea who I was marrying, or sleeping with. I had every opportunity to put on the brakes, and chose to pour the beers.
Lesson: take your time getting to know someone, and their family well before moving forward with them, it can very severely impact your life and others too.
The Starsong Princess 16 hours ago
Monitor your kids’ credit because she’ll do to them what her parents did to her.
#25
That her bottom functions as a low level fog horn some mornings.
#26
He had never had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in his life, and I found this out when we were married for more than five years. I made him his first pb&j when he was 30, and he was blown away by how good it was.
tracy black 56 minutes ago
im 62 and have yet to have a pb&j because it sounds disgusting i love pb and jelly but i aint eating em together
#27
I'd known that he'd struggled with anxiety and depression throughout his life, but about 5 months after the wedding it really hit hard. We'd just bought a car because he'd been doing well at his first full time job. The stress off needing to work or else crashed down so hard that had to stop completely. The panic attacks were so severe and frequent that he nearly couldn't leave the house. He couldn't drive to work because he'd shake so violently and his arms and legs would go numb. Every morning around 4am he'd wake up to try to go to work and I'd stop him. We'd sit in the dark until he calmed down enough to play a video game for a while. These attacks would happen around 5 times a day. They've dissipated since he formally left the job and we decided that my income was technically enough. I had no idea that anxiety attacks could be that severe, and I wish I could take them away for him, at least so that he could get more out of life.
Since we decided he won't work outside of home, we've started a family and he'll soon be a stay at home dad for our son. Instead of filling my husband with anxiety or terror, I've never seen him so excited and confident in himself.
Barking Squirrel 6 hours ago
If he had panic attacks about his job, how is he going to cope with the pressures of parenthood?
#29
That he never told his parents I was giving him money to give to them even before I moved in. His parents owned the house he lived in and there were always people staying there for free. I felt bad so when I had extra money I would give him some to give to his parents to help with utilities while also paying rent for my own apartment. He told me his parents told him to keep the money. They didn't know anything about it.
Also, one night he brought some people home from work while we were house sitting for his parents. Some money went missing from the safe and I assumed they stole it. He origionally told his parents that they stole it. After we broke up he told them I was really the one that stole. Turns out he stole the money.
#30
Food garbage goes in the freezer until garbage day. So my freezer is like 1/3 full of freezer bags of strawberry tops, apple cores, banana peels, green pepper centers, etc…….
HER “It doesn’t smell this way”
ME “then put it in the garbage can outside!! You know, where it’s going to go anyway”!!!!!
cecilia kilian 4 hours ago
Depending on where you live, this keeps pests and scavenging animals away, and prevents a horrendous stink in hot weather.A bin teeming with maggots is not fun!
#31
After dating for seven years and well-establishing that I like to sleep in when I don't have plans, we got married. Suddenly, idk why, apparently "we" had a bedtime AND in the morning, it was suddenly "time for us to get up." Had to have a stern conversation with my morning-person husband about that real quick. If there's stuff we have to do, yeah sure, but if it's a lazy Sunday, leave me alone and go play video games alone.
#32
He thought the word 'subtle' meant the opposite of what it means. All through dating and the first few years of marriage (~7 years) I just thought he was using it sarcastically.
Also he gets 'horizontal' and 'vertical' confused. As in, he falls down on the bed after a long day and says "Ahhh, it's so nice to finally be vertical."
He has a nice bum, though, so it evens out.
#33
My grandpa told my grandma he was italian. They got married while she was pregnant and she had not met his family yet. When they did go to meet his parents they were talking in Ojibwe (a native american language) and she looked at him and said "Thats not italian. What are they speaking?" and thats how my grandma found out she was married to an Indian not an Italian.
Elladine DesIsles 12 hours ago
Incidentally, the language is called Anishinaabemowin. I have been grateful to have had the opportunity to learn a little bit of it, one of the languages of my ancestors, though I would love to improve.
#34
So, to start. I like spiders. I don't particularly love them, but I don't mind them and I make it a point to try to let them live. I even let them hang out in the corners of rooms and later clean up their leftover houses and stuff. Afterall, they're just going to eat up all the other bugs that I don't want around like mosquitos and such.
Forward to last week- 10 years with my husband, 7 of which we've been married. I pull out a spider decoration for Halloween (it's a stuffed spider with wire legs that's about 2 feet wide) and he proceeds to calmly tell me to please take it away and he doesn't want to see it because he has- and apparently always has had- an extreme spider phobia.
I thought it was a joke and he was just doing a bad job at being funny so I threw the spider at him.
I won't do that again.
#35
That he was REALLY awful to his only other long-term gf. The more time went on and I heard more stories the worse I felt for this poor girl. I eventually asked him to find her and apologize.
#36
She's still great, but I didn't realize how poorly she had been parented. Not like her parents were hurting her or mean, they're great in-laws and people. They just didn't do the job of preparing their children to be adults.
Her mom was the type that compulsively took care of everything, and her dad wasn't super involved (probably to avoid fighting with the mom). They did a good job with character and temperament though, which I appreciate. Adulthood just hit my wife like a freight train, and what it is was completely alien to her. An extra 4 years of college, made it worse by her being even older when she first experienced it. It's been hard for her, but she's further along than both her older siblings at least. Her brother is like 38 and still doing laundry at home, and her sister got a tech job that prints money and is so coddled by her husband she's basically never had to become an adult.
It seems to be a fairly common problem with my generation. Fortunately, I was raised poor enough my mom didn't have a choice, so my sister and I were both pretty independent at a young age and really haven't seen anything we weren't prepared for by experience. Most importantly, we can handle pressure and don't fall apart at the slightest setback.
#37
My wife and I have only been married just under 2 years but we've been together almost 12. We lived together 3 months in so I knew most of her weird habits and routines. Had kids young and struggled but we got there. Better late then never.
One thing that caught me off guard and grosses me out though is her love for french toast and ketchup!! It's the most revolting thing I've ever seen a person eat. For almost a decade she hid this weird obsession all because she knew I don't like ketchup!!
#38
She enjoys pineapple on pizza...
#39
That he supported his buddy's family financially while his buddy spent a year in federal prison, not "England" as everyone else was told. My husband kept his buddy's employement open by doing his buddy's job as well as his own job during that year.
Edit: thought of another one. We were married about three years before I found out he had once given his cousin a stack of signed, blank checks because she was a single mom and struggling to pay her bills.
#40
That 3/4 of the time he spends in the bathroom is spent on "iPad time". For years I thought he was struggling with digestive issues..... nope, just the Simpsons game.
Crystalwitch60 10 hours ago
Back pre internet men used to take the newspaper in lol was the done thing 🤷♀️
#41
That he has a THIRD middle name.
He gets a pass though, because he didn't know either. And his amazing pinnacle of love and devotion, his mother, also forgot, and when shown the birth certificate showing a third middle name, wondered aloud, "Now why did I do that?"
Sara Frazer 35 minutes ago
Just a couple years ago, in his late 30s, my partner discovered he has a second middle name. Also by looking at his birth certificate. Our best guess was a way to differentiate him from his father and grandfather (they all have the same first, middle and last names, so he's a third)
#42
That she leaves one second on the microwave everytime because she doesn't want it to beep......
#43
That he had been a virgin when we met. Seriously, I couldn't even tell. Dude has some serious skill.
#44
I learned on our honeymoon he opens bottles using his ring finger and palm, not thumb and forefinger. I never noticed this and had no idea everyone didn't open bottles the way I do. Once I got a ring on him he suddenly couldn't open bottles because the ring got in the way.
#49
She had two other kids, that she'd abandoned. After my youngest (with her) was just over one year old, we didn't see her for almost ten years.
I have custody, FYI.
#50
The extent to which she thinks farts are funny. She let on that they were humorous before we got married, but now I realize she thinks they're goddam hilarious. A good fart can always put a smile on her face.
UnclePanda 7 hours ago
Kids think farts are funny because adults think farts are funny but try to hide it.
#51
He's literally never cleaned a thing in his life. No idea how to vacuum, clean a toilet or a shower.. it was interesting.
He's much better now.
#52
That rice crispy treats are his favorite "baked" good. He had never so much as mentioned them before to me.
Two years married and suddenly- this bombshell! Out of the blue!
But seriously: after we got married I realized that he wasn't as calm as he seemed.
He can actually get very anxious (like a normal human being) and if he doesn't do something active for a few days (work out, run, etc) he gets hyper like a 3 year old on a sugar high- manic, can't sit still, loud singing....
It's quite something to behold.
#53
How shockingly alike we are.
We're going on year number 5 together and year number 2.5 married.
She and I think so much alike that it's scary. To the point where we say the same things at the same time in the same exact way on a daily basis.
If I didn't know for a fact that she wasn't my "Earth-11" or "Rule 63" counterpart then I'd be worried.
#54
He has a really hairy ... place. Like a mustache. But he has relatively sparse body hair everywhere else.
We tried to wax it once.
Edited to add: Oh no... why this comment. Thank god my husband doesn't use reddit and wouldn't know how to navigate it to save his life.
Uhh... so I guess to clarify--I had leftover wax (Sally Hansen Brazilian if anyone was wondering) from doing myself and didn't want it to take up cabinet space so I talked him into letting me wax him. BTW we didn't want to trim it/buzz it since it gets scratchy when the stubs come in (I hate shaving my legs or girl parts for this very reason) and the hairs were too long for my epilator (this is like an electric tweezer that does the job of plucking all the hair out without the messy wax) and I imagined it would hurt a lot more. We did his knuckles and legs and he didn't think it was too bad and one thing led to another we decided to take a look at his taint.
It was weird, like why was it mustache-y? Anyway, I dusted him with baby powder (this way the wax doesn't stick to his skin) and applied the hot wax.
There is a TIFU part to this.
I probably should have trimmed it at least with scissors first because too much hair and the hair wins--the wax gets peeled off the paper as you're stripping it off--so all the pain and none of the reward. Of course, he's screaming and freaking out from the pain and I start laughing hysterically (I'm someone who has that thing where you don't have the right reaction sometimes and most of the time if I'm scared or nervous, I start laughing uncontrollably.)
This gets really weird which was why I hesitated to type this out but --
I have to apply more wax because once the wax on his hair has touched another surface and then peels off, it loses it's stickiness. It's a huge mess at this point too. So I try to go get ice since it would numb the skin and make it hurt less.
I don't have ice in the freezer.
But what I DO have is a bag of individually packaged frozen tuna from Costco.
We eventually get all the wax and hair off.
We never tried it again and I still can't bring myself to buy packaged frozen tuna from Costco (which I used to enjoy using to make tuna tataki.)
Lyoness 41 minutes ago
People who've never waxed their genital area don't understand the pain and (I can't stress this enough) do NOT want to find out. If you insist on being hairless try a depilatory (a cream that dissolves hair, meaning no scratchy stubble as hair regrows) but FFS test it on small patch of skin FIRST to make sure you're not allergic.
#55
After the whole Chris Brown/Rihanna story broke, she said "I don't see what the big deal is. I'd slap you around too if you ever check my cell phone."
#56
That he was married before. We've been married for over 10 years.
I found out last week that the divorce from his first marriage was never filed, so my marriage to him is not valid.
Stephanie A Mutti 5 hours ago
That the divorce isn't final might have been a mis-understanding on his part but that you didn't know he'd been married before is a pretty big fact to gloss over before getting married again. I'd be very concerned what that is all about.
#57
My wife has very strong opinions on natural foods, added sugars, preservatives, and organic growing methods. After we got married I noticed that several staples of my diet were slowly being phased out. The other shoe didn't fully drop until we had kids, at which point everything was evaluated for content before purchase, and many things were just barred from being brought into the house.
This isn't a bad thing, I'm healthier than I have ever been in my life, but she didn't show any of the signs of being this crunchy before we got married.
Barking Squirrel 6 hours ago
We currently have the information we need on nutrition, preservatives, etc. and there is nothing wrong with ensuring one's diet is healthy.
#58
Two months after our wedding, just after we mailed all the thank-you cards to our guests, she calmly suggested an idea about our honeymoon, which was another two months away.
"Let's go as friends."
What she really meant was "Let's get divorced."
She genuinely believes her life is meant to be a tragedy, a belief that I couldn't help her shake off. We did manage to go on the honeymoon as a couple, but we filed for divorce within half a year.
I hope she's okay. I'm having a blasty blast.
#59
When the weather is dry, we both get static shock every now and then when we touch each other.
#60
That once we were married every card I would receive would have WIFE or DAUGHTER-IN-LAW or SISTER-IN-LAW printed on it in massive letters as his family love to buy cards that clearly designate your relationship. Nearly 20 years and never had one that just had a picture or cartoon, always cards that have your position in the family in very big letters.
#61
That she never actually loved me just used me to pay for things so she didn’t have to work.
#62
"Wait, you're left handed?"
LakotaWolf (she/her) 15 hours ago
As a left-handed person, one of the FIRST things I tend to notice about someone is their handedness, especially if they're left-handed like me XD (even if I don't see someone writing, I tend to notice what wrist someone wears their watch/bracelets on, which is usually a good indicator of their handedness.) I am also prone to whispering "omg they're left-handed!!!" in a movie/during a TV show if I notice one of the actors/actresses is left-handed XD
#63
He's very much like a llama. Upset him at just the right time and he'll completely lose his appetite and refuse to eat for a while.
#64
Nothing. That's why it took us 7 years to get married. I told her I'm only doing this once so we better be sure. Happy together since 2000.
#65
My wife and I discovered horrifying things about each other, because after we married we shared one car.
I will drink a coffee that has been out all day. It's normal for me to put a giant jug of iced coffee in the car and then sip from it intermittently for many hours.
My wife, it turns out, often feels congested. She'll discreetly hock a gigantic loogie into any discarded coffee cup nearby.
I would drive the car in the morning, then we'd switch midday and she'd take it for the afternoon, then I'd take it back in the evening.
Twice I picked up my neglected coffee and took a loooong draw. The straw was blocked, needed lots of suction, and then something icy and slimy slithered into my mouth.
We have two cars now and I keep them both stocked with tissues at hand.
#66
She's really strict about things and super Type A, but is also as lazy as me, so it doesn't actually get done.
Also, apparently she missed the part of our long conversations about adoption when I VERY CLEARLY stated that I didn't want to adopt babies because I don't like them and they are in high demand and it's the kids that need us. She recently informed me, "If we're adopting, we're getting a baby." So that's been great.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 15 hours ago
Full stop, basic incompatibility there. If OP does not want a "baby" (as in, wants to adopt an older child) but wife wants to adopt a baby, that is a fundamental incompatibility.
#67
He hates kitchen cabinets are left open. When I found that out, I'd open a few random ones up every day. It took him awhile to catch on that I was doing it to annoy him. I'd wait until just before he got home to do it because it annoys me too. Every now and again, if I'm not going to be home when he gets here, I'll leave all the cabinets and drawers open just to let him know I was thinking about him.
Barking Squirrel 6 hours ago
Pretty spiteful. "Holding on to anger is like swallowing poison and waiting for the other person to d!e"
#68
That he has an infuriating habit of throwing things away that shouldn't be thrown away.
He is an extremely clean person, and I love that about him, but he takes it overboard.
For example, we will have a half a tub of butter, and see another tub at the store that's on sale for a decent price, so we will buy the butter that's on sale. Well, instead of using up the half tub of butter at home, he will just throw it away and open the new one. He does this not just with butter, but with every single food item you can think of.
He also throws away things that in my opinion are very important, but in his opinion are causing clutter, which he gets super anxious about. He has thrown away a dvd collection, our lease, brand new clothes that myself or my kids haven't worn yet and so in his mind never get worn, blankets, towels, shoes, ect.
I tried to set up a box for him to throw everything into instead of the garbage so that way I can pull things out that I actually want, and then donate the other things to charity, but that didn't last long. He literally threw the box away because it was in the way.
Also learned when we got a dog that he is terrified to scold the dog for any reason, or raise his voice around it, because he's convinced the dog won't like him if he does those things, and that thought is devastating to him.
Unfortunately my husband is probably the sweetest, kindest person you could ever hope to meet so it makes it really hard to stay angry at him for any reason.
Tl;Dr: Throws away things that are still useful, let's the dog do whatever he wants.
#69
How hard working he is. When we were engaged he was training in his field. He is naturally intelligent, so didn't study much and played a lot of games. Now that he's in his career, I've seen such a shift in his attitude and nature.
#70
It took me 7 years to figure it out, and it was because of a post I saw on Reddit. She is a malignant narcissist.
#71
That she was a witch. Bit o' nasty shock for me when I found out.
#72
Currently living together engaged, but...
Anything she does has a mess left. She cooks, the pots/pans stay on the stove. Showers always have her old clothes left in the bathroom. Trying to find a specific shirt, you bet you there are clothes scatter across the floor.
Other than that everything's perfect.
#73
Not married (thankfully) but I had a girlfriend and after a couple of months it came out that she thought the earth was flat.
#74
The shedding. My god, the shedding. I'd like to put a long sleeve shirt on without getting one of her hairs stuck between my fingers on the way through the sleeves. Man, I remember what that was like.
#75
She doesn't shower everyday like I do.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 15 hours ago
Not everyone needs to, and for certain people and/or certain skin conditions, they shouldn't shower every day.
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