17YO Doesn’t Want To Be In The Life Of His Absentee Bio Dad’s Unborn Baby, Sparks A Huge Drama
Interview With ExpertThe great American writer Ernest Hemingway called Paris “a holiday you can’t live without.” Well, some people view their entire lives that way, perceiving them as a series of fun and adventures. But if kids are born during these adventures, they don’t view them as significant.
Our narrator today, unfortunately, was one of those kids whose father was never around, so he was raised by his grandparents and uncle. And then, one day, the teen was forced to make a life-changing decision when he was contacted by a woman who was his absentee dad’s ex-girlfriend…
More info: Reddit
Sometimes, we have to make hard decisions in our lives even before coming of age, and this can either build our character or make us overly vulnerable
Image credits: frimages / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author is 17 years old, and he lost his mother early, while his dad wasn’t in the picture at all, so his grandparents raised him
Image credits: lucigerma / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Recently, a lady reached out to him, claiming that she was his bio dad’s ex-girlfriend and that she’s bearing his half-sibling
Image credits: sosiukin / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman asked the author to be present in her unborn baby’s life, but the teen answered with a flat-out “No”
Image credits: Rylenkad
Then the mom-to-be tried to blackmail the author’s grandparents, expecting them to impact his decision, and lost it completely as they refused, too
The Original poster (OP) says he’s 17 and sees his biological father very rarely. “Very rarely” in this situation actually means about 5 times in the last 10 years. The author lost his mom a long time ago, so he was raised by his dad’s parents and his brother. However, our hero himself says he has no desire to communicate with his useless bio dad.
But recently, he was contacted by a woman his father had dated for a while, only to be dumped, as he had done with nearly all his numerous girlfriends. The only difference from previous situations was that this lad was left pregnant, so the unborn baby was actually the original poster’s half-sibling.
The mom-to-be asked the author and his grandparents whether they wanted to be part of the baby’s life, but our hero firmly replied, “No.” He claimed he wanted nothing to do with anything or anyone related to that man and, frankly, had no feelings for the baby, who was partially his blood.
Upon hearing his refusal, the woman became incredibly upset and tried to blackmail the OP’s grandparents. She expected them to influence his decision, threatening that they would never see their youngest grandkid again if they didn’t. They claimed the author’s decision was his sole prerogative, so now they’re all taking heat from that lady. And the teen decided to take this online, seeking support.
Image credits: polya_olya / Freepik (not the actual photo)
“On the one hand, yes, one can understand the feelings of a future mother who is trying to somehow find relatives on her child’s father’s side. On the other hand, her behavior after being rejected suggests that things aren’t so simple,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment about this situation.
According to the expert, situations often arise where mothers try to “weaponize” their babies, expecting relatives to support them. Especially over babysitting. Incidentally, we ourselves have mentioned more than once similar cases in which the teen siblings were considered by the new moms as free babysitters or even built-in daycare.
“This teenager’s decision seems harsh, but ultimately, it’s entirely justified. He’s never seen this woman, and has had virtually no contact with his biological father his entire life, so family here isn’t so much about blood as it is about upbringing. Everyone makes their own choices, and he made his,” Irina Matveeva summarizes.
It should be noted that many commenters also supported the original poster, suspecting that his father’s former girlfriend needed him almost exclusively as a free babysitter. And that in the future she would likely try to extort money from his grandparents, too. So, the author received full approval from the netizens. And what do you, our dear readers, think?
Most commenters assumed that the woman just considered the teen as a free babysitter, and praised him for making this harsh, yet right decision
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I practiced Family Law for years and I would run into people like this all the time. “Yeah, I know he cheated on every woman he has ever been involved with, but he would NEVER cheat on me. Yeah, I know he’s abandoned his children and refuses to pay child support, but I KNOW him; he would NEVER abandon our baby.” The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. This isn’t rocket science.
I had a good example of this in my own family. My Mom, a serial cheater, would be shocked and furious that her cheating partners were also cheating with people other than her. Like, what do you expect, right? But she was convinced that she was so awesome they would never treat her like they did every other woman in their lives.
Load More Replies...I practiced Family Law for years and I would run into people like this all the time. “Yeah, I know he cheated on every woman he has ever been involved with, but he would NEVER cheat on me. Yeah, I know he’s abandoned his children and refuses to pay child support, but I KNOW him; he would NEVER abandon our baby.” The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. This isn’t rocket science.
I had a good example of this in my own family. My Mom, a serial cheater, would be shocked and furious that her cheating partners were also cheating with people other than her. Like, what do you expect, right? But she was convinced that she was so awesome they would never treat her like they did every other woman in their lives.
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