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Mom Is Livid After Disabled Person On Bus Refused To Move So She Could Sit Together With Her 5YO
Interview With ExpertDisability is not something that people choose to have, and having compassion for disabled people is the least that you can do to make them feel equal. Unfortunately, not everyone is wise enough to understand how to treat them, and they end up—knowingly or unknowingly—being ableist.
So was Reddit user salesmansellout, who got angry when a disabled man refused to move for her and her daughter to sit on the bus. And in her anger, she even made her kid stand up during the entire journey to their stop.
More info: Reddit
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The poster of this story was traveling by bus with her 5-year-old daughter
Image credits: Jon Flobrant / unsplash (not the actual photo)
On the bus, there were no other seats available except for one next to a disabled man who was sitting in his wheelchair
Image credits: salesmansellout
Image credits: Kampus Production / pexels (not the actual photo)
As she wanted to sit with her daughter, the poster asked the disabled man to move to another spot, but he refused
Image credits: salesmansellout
The poster was so furious at the refusal that she made her daughter stand for the rest of the journey along with her
In today’s story, the Reddit community slammed the original poster (OP) for her ableist behavior. What happened was that she was traveling on a bus with her 5-year-old daughter. All the seats were occupied except for one next to a disabled man who was sitting in a wheelchair. The poster wanted her kid to sit with her, so she thought it was okay to ask the man to move.
But, of course, it wasn’t okay, as it would have been a total hassle for the man to move. And after all, he had every right to occupy that particular space, so it was but natural for him to refuse. But OP still pushed for it, claiming that her daughter was young so needed to sit with her for safety reasons.
Well, the man refused again and sparked the poster’s fury. In fact, she was so frustrated that she made her daughter stand with her for the rest of the journey and stated that it was “uncomfortable and tiring”. However, when she narrated the incident to her friend, she got a slap of reality as her friend said that she was being insensitive and an ableist.
And that was exactly what the Redditors declared as well. They were quite baffled by her insensitivity towards the needs of a disabled man. And they said that her ableism was blatantly exposed from the incident and it was shocking that she didn’t realize her mistake.
To get expert insights, Bored Panda interviewed Gazala Khan, a trainee counselor at an NGO, New Morning. She said, “Lack of empathy can contribute to such behavior, as the individual might not fully appreciate or consider the impact of their request on others. Also, such behavior may stem as normal to them because of their past experiences where all their demands were met without being questioned.”
People were also shocked by how she had endangered her own kid as she could’ve gotten hurt while standing in a moving bus. They said that she could’ve just let her daughter sit while she stood next to her. Some were also concerned that the child witnessed her mom being ableist and it might affect her as well.
Image credits: Nguyen Minh / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Gazala mentioned that when a child witnesses such ableist behavior by their parents, it kind of normalizes the bias. She also stressed that the child’s process of developing empathy, understanding, and other social values is also hindered. It seems like the Redditors were right to point this out.
Some folks also called out her entitled behavior as she made it sound like standing for some time was a tragedy. They emphasized the fact that people like OP have to develop more sensitivity when it comes to the needs of disabled people.
According to Gazala, “This kind of unconscious bias leads to stereotypes about disability, which can further result in a lack of awareness or sensitivity towards the needs and challenges of people with disabilities. Implicit bias can perpetuate inequality and reduce the likelihood of empathetic and equitable interactions.”
“Sometimes, able-bodied individuals might undervalue the importance of accessibility or fail to recognize the specific accommodations that are necessary for those with disabilities,” she added.
When we asked her about how important it is to educate the public about the rights and needs of individuals with disabilities, she mentioned that it’s highly important. She believes that this will promote inclusion and feelings of empathy to fight the stigma attached to it.
She advised that it can be taught to the public through educational awareness campaigns, showcasing and promoting positive representation to normalize their presence and challenges.
Do you agree with the Redditors and our expert? Let us know in the comments!
She faced backlash from the Redditors, who claimed that she was an ableist who also endangered her daughter by making her stand in a moving bus
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION / pexels (not the actual photo)
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What do you think ?
Sophie de Ronde 1 year ago
Are you seriously asking a disabled person (whether clearly so DUE TO THEIR WHEELCHAIR) to move for you? F*CK OFF.
P Peitsch 1 year ago (edited)
I'm wondering, in which country happened this? Because in Germany there are specially made spaces for people who are using a wheelchair on all public transportation vehicles, some have foldable chairs. Of course, you can stay on that place or sit on the chair, but when a person in wheelchair enters the bus!tram/train, there is no question, that you move. And it is unimaginable to ask a person in wheelchair to move for you to sit .
Load More Replies...
Apatheist Account2 1 year ago
Hardly worth reporting. Sit on your lap. Some people should have to pass a test before becoming parents.
Robert Cornish 1 year ago
OP is clearly the YTA here. Those designated spots on the bus are there for the elderly, people who use a wheelchair (powered/manual), walkers, canes and invisible medical disabilities. I am fortunate that I, as a wheelchair user myself, have not come across an entitled person like the OP yet.
Dragons Exist 1 year ago
Even if they weren't disabled then you would still be yta, having a child doesn't give you any more right to sit than anyone else
notlikeyou1971 1 year ago
As a person who has multiple disabilities, I have a question, is OP out of their skull?!! It's nervy and obnoxious to ask a person in a wheelchair to move for you. The entitlement is disgusting. As my medical issues grew my kindness decreased so you would definitely have gotten an earful from me. I came close to dealing with one of you people once at a grocery. A lady was about to scream at me for being on a scooter while at the grocery. She wasn't elderly, she just wanted it or didn't think I needed it because of my age. She had that look and came stomping over. 2 things happened when she started to open her mouth, she saw the cane and my 6ft 4 boyfriend really close. She didn't walk away, she bolted. You don't give disabled people attitude or ask them to move for your convenience on a bus. There are designated areas for disabled people on busses. Get over yourself!
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
I'm so sorry you had to go through that :( I cannot stand people like that. My dad had an accident when I was 18 and sustained catastrophic brain damage. He was fully disabled afterwards and had to be in a wheelchair (couldn't use a scooter sadly, too much brain damage.) There were times when I'd be wheeling him when we'd go places as a family and we'd request the "disabled access" table or seating or what-have-you. We'd get dirty looks as my dad still looked young (he was 58 when the accident happened) and I remember nearly going to WAR with a lady on a shuttle ride when I put my dad in the disabled spot and sat next to him to hold him upright by his transfer-belt (he would have fallen over if left unsupported.) She was mad that "I" was "taking up two seats" when "both of us looked fine". I pulled up my dad's shirt to show his feeding tube and said "DOES HE LOOK FINE?" not angrily, but loud enough to make a scene. XD
Load More Replies...
kath morgan 1 year ago
Standing on the bus is uncomfortable everyone, princess. You and your child are not fúcking special.
BrownEyedPanda 1 year ago
Especially when you use a cane, but the able-bodied passengers are occupying the disabled seats and pretend they don't see you. Yes, I've lived it.
Load More Replies...
Oerff On Tour 1 year ago
She was surely entitled to the seat. Not every disability is immediately visible. She obviously (by the circumstances as described) had her brain amputated.
Vinnie 1 year ago
So let me think this over: The person with the wheelchair is supposed to move their wheelchair and then crawl or limp back to their seat... No wait, the person with the wheelchair is supposed to get in the wheelchair and move into the middle of the aisle... No, wait - oh cr@p, I think I just hurt my brain. :(
KatSaidWhat 1 year ago
London here, an entitled mother asked a wheelchair person to move so she had room for her pram. Luckily London doesn't stand for that s**t and she ended up not getting that bus...
Sophie de Ronde 1 year ago
Are you seriously asking a disabled person (whether clearly so DUE TO THEIR WHEELCHAIR) to move for you? F*CK OFF.
P Peitsch 1 year ago (edited)
I'm wondering, in which country happened this? Because in Germany there are specially made spaces for people who are using a wheelchair on all public transportation vehicles, some have foldable chairs. Of course, you can stay on that place or sit on the chair, but when a person in wheelchair enters the bus!tram/train, there is no question, that you move. And it is unimaginable to ask a person in wheelchair to move for you to sit .
Load More Replies... Apatheist Account2 1 year ago
Hardly worth reporting. Sit on your lap. Some people should have to pass a test before becoming parents.
Robert Cornish 1 year ago
OP is clearly the YTA here. Those designated spots on the bus are there for the elderly, people who use a wheelchair (powered/manual), walkers, canes and invisible medical disabilities. I am fortunate that I, as a wheelchair user myself, have not come across an entitled person like the OP yet.
Dragons Exist 1 year ago
Even if they weren't disabled then you would still be yta, having a child doesn't give you any more right to sit than anyone else
notlikeyou1971 1 year ago
As a person who has multiple disabilities, I have a question, is OP out of their skull?!! It's nervy and obnoxious to ask a person in a wheelchair to move for you. The entitlement is disgusting. As my medical issues grew my kindness decreased so you would definitely have gotten an earful from me. I came close to dealing with one of you people once at a grocery. A lady was about to scream at me for being on a scooter while at the grocery. She wasn't elderly, she just wanted it or didn't think I needed it because of my age. She had that look and came stomping over. 2 things happened when she started to open her mouth, she saw the cane and my 6ft 4 boyfriend really close. She didn't walk away, she bolted. You don't give disabled people attitude or ask them to move for your convenience on a bus. There are designated areas for disabled people on busses. Get over yourself!
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
I'm so sorry you had to go through that :( I cannot stand people like that. My dad had an accident when I was 18 and sustained catastrophic brain damage. He was fully disabled afterwards and had to be in a wheelchair (couldn't use a scooter sadly, too much brain damage.) There were times when I'd be wheeling him when we'd go places as a family and we'd request the "disabled access" table or seating or what-have-you. We'd get dirty looks as my dad still looked young (he was 58 when the accident happened) and I remember nearly going to WAR with a lady on a shuttle ride when I put my dad in the disabled spot and sat next to him to hold him upright by his transfer-belt (he would have fallen over if left unsupported.) She was mad that "I" was "taking up two seats" when "both of us looked fine". I pulled up my dad's shirt to show his feeding tube and said "DOES HE LOOK FINE?" not angrily, but loud enough to make a scene. XD
Load More Replies... kath morgan 1 year ago
Standing on the bus is uncomfortable everyone, princess. You and your child are not fúcking special.
BrownEyedPanda 1 year ago
Especially when you use a cane, but the able-bodied passengers are occupying the disabled seats and pretend they don't see you. Yes, I've lived it.
Load More Replies... Oerff On Tour 1 year ago
She was surely entitled to the seat. Not every disability is immediately visible. She obviously (by the circumstances as described) had her brain amputated.
Vinnie 1 year ago
So let me think this over: The person with the wheelchair is supposed to move their wheelchair and then crawl or limp back to their seat... No wait, the person with the wheelchair is supposed to get in the wheelchair and move into the middle of the aisle... No, wait - oh cr@p, I think I just hurt my brain. :(
KatSaidWhat 1 year ago
London here, an entitled mother asked a wheelchair person to move so she had room for her pram. Luckily London doesn't stand for that s**t and she ended up not getting that bus...
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