What Am I Doing Wrong?

I am so confused. I am in love with this man and feel like I'm trying everything in the book to make this work but I'm not getting what I need no matter how I ask for it. I want to start out by saying that I have a chronic condition (migraine) with which I am very much up front during dating. It is debilitating for me and thus very much impacts a partner that I have and I am not at peace with it at all, unfortunately. I am ashamed of being essentially a needy 3 year old (I need to take daily lunch naps, need to eat regularly, have enough water, exercise, can't smell car exhaust, too loud isn't good etc etc.) and do everything within my power to make these things MY problem and not anyone else's. I plan my day and travel accordingly, carry water and food everywhere, I make good enough money so I can avoid other triggers as much as possible. Running errands is very exhausting for me so as much as possible, I pay people to do that for me (instacart etc). That's not because I think I'm so much better than everyone else but because if I run two errands, I literally get home, get a migraine and can't work or do anything but sleep for the rest of the day. I'm self employed (work as a freelance analyst) so I can't afford that very often.

One thing that triggers my migraines is when my boundaries get violated. When I allow myself to be a pushover and do things that I know I don't want to be doing. This sounds rather odd but I was molested as a child and thus establishing boundaries is very difficult for me to begin with, often I don't even know what I want because I'm not used to think about it. Something I am working on actively, the establishment of boundaries with family especially and then also with my boyfriend but with him it's just very confusing.

Again, I told him from the very beginning that I have some rather odd needs that are fundamentally important for my health, aka the migraine. I very much believe that one should treat others the way I want to be treated. He said that we all have our things and that was that. We are dating for ~8 months now and I feel increasingly what I can only describe as drained. In January I started talking about the love languages with him because I didn't feel my needs were being met. One of my love languages is acts of service. I asked him to please run an errand for me, something that actually wasn't even for me but to pick up his dry cleaning of clothes I bought for him and I'd pay for the dry cleaning. In the end, I picked it up. When he's at my place, he'll make himself dinner but not ask whether I'm hungry and make something for me too. I always make dinner for both of us. He does clean the dishes after he eats and if I cook he cleans both of our dishes. But never even so much as a wee bit more than what's immediately his. The pots and pans are my problem. We never talked about the love languages, I tried 3 times, he guessed 3 times wrong and didn't remember when I told him what it was. I gave up.

One of the things I really don't understand is his insistence on listening to the news on his phone. Given my silly sensibilities that I myself don't particularly enjoy either, noises from phones such as music but especially advertisements are very irritating for me and cause migraine if they are around too long. I told him several times, I cried, I even yelled (not in my nature and I was not happy about it), but he just keeps doing it. Not as often but he just does. Can't use headphones. Can't turn the sound off. He says he loves me and then he does that. I really have problems understanding that. I wouldn't do that. I love that man. If I do something that hurts him and he tells me so, I stop because I don't want to hurt him. Why doesn't he do the same?

It's so disheartening because I finally find my voice and say very clearly what I need and it's not freaking working. What am I doing wrong?