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“It Gets Better”: 30 Lies People In This Online Group Convinced Themselves To Believe In To Feel Better About Life
Unfortunately (or not), life isn't always rainbows and butterflies. Being alive inevitably means getting used to stuff not turning out quite the way we planned, misfortune happening for no particular reason, losing loved ones, getting lost, and plenty of other things most of us aren't that thrilled about. However, that "getting used to" and accepting reality for what it is has its challenges.
Recently, Reddit user mynameisnotbecky1 asked fellow community members "What is an untruth people tell themselves to feel better about life or the world they live in?" The post received quite a bit of attention and, as of now, has over 13k answers and almost 30k upvotes. With that being said, Bored Panda invites you to look through some of the best comments we managed to find.
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There's a few but the main one I tell myself if that the people who hurt me are also hurting. As a kid I thought people bullied each other because their lives sucked, and then I realized my life also sucked and I didn't treat other people like that so what was their excuse
"looks don't matter"
I've noticed that this is generally said by attractive people, and people who have never struggled in dating
I believe looks matter as a first impression for sure!! We are all attracted by the looks at first we can't help it cause we don't know anything about the other person! But wait until that extremely good looking person opens the mouth and says: "well, i don't really believe in vaccines and this staff"
People always get what's coming to them.
The reality is that sometimes the people who tormented you all those years ago are likely living pretty good lives.
Yeah, I don't really believe in karma. If there was karma, how come so many really good people get screwed?
Money can’t buy happiness.
Don’t have a house, job, and are starving? Don’t worry, just because you’re poor, doesn’t mean that having a mansion, 5 course meals, or a six digit salary will make you happier!
A positive attitude will make you physically better. As a chick with cancer, I get the “just have the positive attitude” advice a lot … which always irked me. No one who feels like c**p wants to fake a positive mindset to make others feel better. My fave response to someone telling me that (again) was actually from a nurse in the room who said: “Please! I’m seen a whole lot of true b****es survive cancer.” That nurse is forever my hero.
Toxic positivity diminishes the seriousness and weight of whatever your going through.
There is someone out there for everyone. Not everyone finds their partner, there is no rule love must follow.
"If I only get this over with , everything is going to be easy!"
Life never runs out of waves to shake you. But while it isn't easy, you do learn to surf better.
Im not an alcoholic , it's not an addiction i can stop whenever i want .. it's just party , birthday, Wednesday or whatever i earned this one and next one !
being like that for 22 years, coming from heavily alcoholic home , sobered up few years ago and it was by far best decision of my life !
"I am going to tell/live MY truth." Your truth is just an excuse for your actions just or not. It's not the objective truth.
Everything happens for a reason
Ugh. I hate this one so much. Same as “it’s gods plan” Like it was Gods plan for children to be molested? Or Oopsie, His bad, the Holocaust didn’t go as planned? What is the reason for horrible things to happen to innocent lives?
“If I fall asleep right now I’ll get X-hours of sleep.”
You’re gonna be awake for a while, honey.
This is so me. I just want more than 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep at night. Brain, please, just stop and let me sleep!
That there used to be "The good ole days" when in fact there never was.
Crime doesn’t pay. I know someone that embezzled over $1 million and got probation and has to pay back less than 10% restitution
Religion does more good than bad
Religion is both the reason and the excuse for just about every war that has been fought.
I believe that every single person (me included) think that they are a bit smarter than what they truly are.
Wisdom comes with age.
I have encountered SO many people old enough to be my mum or dad but who act like they're thirteen.
It gets better.
10 years later and you still tell yourself that.
That the majority of people have a good soul and a good heart.
I tell myself this all the time. I’m constantly proven wrong. In reality, the majority of people are selfish and unkind, especially when it comes to other people.
If that were truly the case civilisation would not have survived. The margin may be small, but on balance more people have to be altruistic in order for society to function. Yes, everyone is selfish, but that doesn't mean everyone is unkind. If everyone, *everyone* you meet is unkind, either you are (sub) consciously only remembering the unkind and forgetting the kind, or at worst neutral, OR the common factor is you.
I just saw Dear Evan Hansen. It's way off base when it comes to mental illness and personality disorders, but it comes as no surprise that it was such a hit on Broadway. It leans heavily on all the myths people want to believe. The truth is that reaching out to your family or friends often doesn't help because they have no idea how to help you or might even be partly responsible for your trauma. For some people, depression and anxiety are intractable even with the best possible treatment. Some people are constitutionally incapable of empathy and will always harm those around them
The thruth is that most pwople dont even make the effort or want to help. Most dont want to be around unsuccessful, ill or depresed people because they get uncomfortable. They shut us up with toxic positivity (you have so many options, others have it worse), indiference, attacks (you are being too begative) or they simply leave you
My parents never helped. My Mother would look at me when I was said I was depressed and say " Oh you're always f*****g depressed. i don't want to hear it" It took me over 20 years to realize that they are the cause of my depression and sever low self esteem. I cut them off and my anxiety and depressive went way way down.
I suffered anxiety for years and years, tried everything (therapy, CBT, DBT, inpatient stays etc) finally had a blood test and was found to be severely anaemic, low vitamin d and b12. A few months after starting iron and vitamin tablets I am like an absolutely new person, I can't actually believe it. Im so angry at all the "professionals" that tried to tell me I was "mentally ill", it was all a load of crap. Made me lose faith in all medical professionals now.
Not surprised that's how you feel. I think not enough emphasis is put on people learning to advocate for themselves. We're all expected to just trust and believe doctors instead of pushing for the best healthcare we can get. Asking for second opinions and so forth. I've been through something similar. I'm so glad you feel better now, at least.
Load More Replies... i have multiple types of anxeity. my parents could never help cuz well how do u tell the ppl who want to help that they r the cause. they sheltered me, tried to make me into someone they wanted, forced ideas onto me etc at a very young age. it got worse as i got older at 13 we found out i was epileptic puberty made it active. they sheltered me even more got paranoid about everything which i picked up on making me worse. the fact i couldnt tell them my anxeity disorders r bc of them they just got worse. my social anxeity (probably due to being sheltered) is y i cant have a job. my parents idea of who i should b and them judging me wen i did wrong made me view the world that way. anxeity is no joke. i have general, social and anti social anxeity all bc of childhood, teenhood and some of my adulthood trauma. wen i was 25 they started to back off bc i met my now husband. they saw a change in me after i met him. i even grew out of my adhd. my anxeity disorders r still here and i can have a panic attack at any moment but my husband tries to make sure all possible triggers r no where in sight. food shopping he holds my hand or stays close and constantly talks to me to distract me from everyone around us. parties if there is someone new we meet them together and he introduces me for me. (parties with friends i have no problem) he always has a way to make sure i dont panic its tough tho bc anything can happen. something can effect both of us and ill get triggered and panic. its sucks but u can learn to live with it like i did or u can give in. u can go the med route but its safer to take the learn to live with it route. most anxeity meds r addictive and can cause other issues. i had no choice i cant take them bc of my epilepsy and the meds i take for that but if u can own ur anxeity u can make it thru watever. its all about how
You have a great man in your life! I am glad you got help therapy and medication
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This is so true. As a parent to someone with a learning disability and mental health struggles, I'll admit I'm not qualified to know the answers and have resources to help. But I do know it's incredibly helpful to show care, concern and understanding, and be there to lend an ear. Just be careful not to let someone's struggles affect your mental health.
It is more helpful than you may even know. My mother, though admittedly most of the cause of my mental disorders, has done a dramatic turnaround in the past few years and is now doing her best to help me. Even a small effort can make a huge difference.
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Identity theft? Oh he’s stressed it’s fine. 🤦🏻♀️ Can’t stand that musical
When I try to reach out to someone because I am depressed, anxious and really in bad state, what I usually get is "I had worse", "you are fine", "just cheer up", " you don't need anyone, you are enough" (said by a person who can not stand to be alone for 2 hours), "you are so spoiled", "lets not talk about serious or negative stuff", and similar pearls of wisdom. The truth is no one cares.
my parents try, but they don't always notice things. i have been depressed since i was at least 7 years old, quite possibly earlier. the youngest i remember suicidal thoughts is age 6. it's not entirely my parents' fault (genetics) but they don't help either: they guilt me, gaslight me, throw the Torah in my face (don't get me wrong, I love my religion, but parents I am honoring you), give me no respect, don't listen to explanations, and are lax on medical care sometimes (i have needed PT for my hips for literal months. no pt yet). i know they lov eme and try their best, but they're part of the problem.
Some people are broken. Some families are broken. There is no one-size-fits-all path to wellness. Comes back to what I always say: how you cope with anything in your life depends on your insight, emotional intelligence and resiliency. These are skills that can be learned.
Not when you are at the bottom of that black pit with no ladder. Many times insight can make things harder. It's not about emotional intelligence. One can be emotionally intelligent, but many times it's incredibly difficult to apply that. Resiliency. Yes. But how do you do that when you don't want to be alive anymore? Learn? OK. But it's about "becoming". And that is one helluva lot harder.
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A theater production doesn't need to be true.... Also, just because something isn't your truth or universal or typical doesn't mean it's somehow untrue. Unlikely things aren't lies.
If you just work hard it’ll all work out in end
No it doesn't. I'm so glad for the uprise of workers not just settling. We need to remember to work to live, not live to work.
That the good times we have now --cheap and available gasoline, food in abundance, even pleasant weather-- can continue indefinitely. We will run out of Nitrogen for crop growth, we will exhaust the available crude oil, climate change will catch up with us. Our grandkids will not have the plentiful resources we have enjoyed for decades, period.
For adults specifically: doing your best = success. Don’t get me wrong, doing your best is something to be proud of, but doing your best without preparation/dedication/practice leads to nowhere
Doing your best=somewhere better than where you're at now, even if it's just by 0.001%*
I live for my loved ones. I lost my wife during childbirth and 4 months later my daughter passed away from a heart condition that was inoperable
That the world is just. Karma is a b***h. What’s coming to them. Etc.
“There is light at the end of the tunnel”. Life is the journey inside that tunnel. Sometimes that journey gets hard, other times it gets easier, but we will never reach that light. The idea of a perfect place does not exist, because life itself is not perfect as we always have something to complain about.
God has a plan
Note: this post originally had 34 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
Save the best for last. You might end up filling up your stomach or depleting your energy to the limit before you get to your favourite thing.
Good things come to those who wait. Or that if something's not working out right now, it's because something better is in the works for you. Didn't get the job you really wanted? Something better is coming along! Didn't work out with your partner? Something better is coming along! There are no guarantees in life. Sometimes things work out the way you want them to, and sometimes they don't. There's peace in accepting that.
Everybody wants to feel good about themselves and their lives and it can be really hard. I think younger people are really self-critical and hard on themselves and that makes me sad. They are living in one of the most economically and politically challenging worlds we've ever had and a lot of older people do nothing but piss on them. Celebrate all your small wins and small achievements. Start there. Brushed your hair today? Tick. Showered? Tick. Cleaned teeth? Tick. Said something nice to another human being? Tick. Finished a chore. Tick. Paid a bill. Tick. Faced a messy cupboard and sorted part of it. Tick. Did something nice for yourself. Tick. This stuff REALLY matters and you can love on yourself regardless of what anyone else thinks.
#1 "If I post on reddit I will be automatically smart and socially relevant."
Obese people me they're happy wth their weight/looks. I'm not, I was never, it sucks on every level and I don't believe you. Change is just too hard for you.
They deserve that money. Their loved one was murdered by a (so-called) public servant on camera. We *all* watched him die. We *all* are a part of the system that allowed it to happen. We f*****g owe them something that cannot ever be repaid.
Load More Replies... Save the best for last. You might end up filling up your stomach or depleting your energy to the limit before you get to your favourite thing.
Good things come to those who wait. Or that if something's not working out right now, it's because something better is in the works for you. Didn't get the job you really wanted? Something better is coming along! Didn't work out with your partner? Something better is coming along! There are no guarantees in life. Sometimes things work out the way you want them to, and sometimes they don't. There's peace in accepting that.
Everybody wants to feel good about themselves and their lives and it can be really hard. I think younger people are really self-critical and hard on themselves and that makes me sad. They are living in one of the most economically and politically challenging worlds we've ever had and a lot of older people do nothing but piss on them. Celebrate all your small wins and small achievements. Start there. Brushed your hair today? Tick. Showered? Tick. Cleaned teeth? Tick. Said something nice to another human being? Tick. Finished a chore. Tick. Paid a bill. Tick. Faced a messy cupboard and sorted part of it. Tick. Did something nice for yourself. Tick. This stuff REALLY matters and you can love on yourself regardless of what anyone else thinks.
#1 "If I post on reddit I will be automatically smart and socially relevant."
Obese people me they're happy wth their weight/looks. I'm not, I was never, it sucks on every level and I don't believe you. Change is just too hard for you.
They deserve that money. Their loved one was murdered by a (so-called) public servant on camera. We *all* watched him die. We *all* are a part of the system that allowed it to happen. We f*****g owe them something that cannot ever be repaid.
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