35 “That’s Not How Women Work” Moments Shared In This Viral Thread
Recent data reveals an alarming education gap that continues to fuel period stigma and misinformation, as nearly one in 10 men (8%) believe menstruation attracts sharks in the sea. With half the population experiencing a period every month, it’s hard to wrap your head around what a lack of knowledge men have about women’s bodies.
And it doesn’t end with periods. The common image of women perpetuated by our society is that they are glitter-farting, strawberry-scented, soft and smooth creatures of hairless wonder. Just typing that feels disturbing, but sadly too many people hear that kind of nonsense told to them every single day.
“What's your ‘That's not how women work’ moment?” redditor u/Gamestar02 asked women on Ask Reddit, and the sigh-inducing responses started rolling in. And you wonder, how did we get to the point where this is acceptable?
I was on my period and I had horrible cramps. One of my guy friends came over to keep me company but he wasn't really prepared for how much pain I was in. I was crying bc it hurt so bad and the poor guy really wanted to help but didn't know what to do so he just suggested that I ' push out all the blood at once bc that usually helped him when trying to stop a nosebleed '. After he said that I looked at him like 'wtf' and he said ' what? Doesn't it stop hurting once all the blood is out?' I explained to him what happens to a female body when we get our period and he was just shocked, it kinda cheered me up tho bc I thought it was hilarious.
The best situation I can think of was something a friend of mine said once. His sister was breastfeeding and said something like „I don’t know if I have enough left“ to her baby. So my friend kindly suggested that someone else can volunteer and asked me. I said well I’m not lactating, since I don’t have a baby and he was honestly shocked to learn that only women who actually gave birth are able to breastfeed. He was convinced every woman just casually has boobs full of breastmilk at all times. He was 25 at that time. I will never forget this.
Person on TV gives birth. 5 minutes later, belly is flat and back to normal.
THATS NOT HOW THAT WORKS.
Among many myths and misconceptions embedded in the mainstream consciousness, some of the most underlying ones are men’s knowledge about menstruation and women’s health aspects that come with it.
According to a recent survey INTIMINA has conducted in the US, men are in general not educated enough when it comes to menstrual cycles. We spoke with Danela Zagar, INTIMINA Global Brand Manager, to find out more about this gaping hole and what can be done about it. Zagar told us that according to the survey data, men not only don't understand what women feel like when menstruating but they don't even feel comfortable talking about it.
Asked my boyfriend to buy me some tampons since he was going to the store, he sends me a picture of a box showing sizes (R for regular and L for large). He asked if I needed left or right ones.
Tampons are NOT pleasurable and are not the same as dildos.
Had a very amusing convo with a gentleman once. Dude was confused why we would need pads. He asked why we didn't just go to the toilet more often on our periods. He thought that we were able to hold our period in line you do with pee and pads are only if accidents happen. So his reasoning is that if women would be more careful we wouldn't need menstrual products.
Props to him, he was apologetic after I explained it to him and overall respectful.
Zagar shared the shocking findings of Intimina's survey, which is that 41% of men could correctly identify what exactly menstruation is. Moreover, when respondents were asked to describe what having a period would feel like, a leading 40% said they would feel physical pain, closely followed by 36% revealing that a period would have no effect on them at all.
When it came to sexual habits during menstruation, 40% of heterosexual males felt it was not appealing to them or their partner to have sex while the woman was on her period, despite the cultural movement to diminish the stigma associated with period sex in recent years.
Additionally, while unlikely, it is possible for a woman to get pregnant while on her period. However, 42% of respondents believe it is not possible for a woman to become pregnant while menstruating.
And at the opposite end of that spectrum of male ignorance you have NASA scientists who packed a few hundred tampons when Sally Ride was going up for a few weeks and checked with her to make sure they had enough
The first guy I dated wanted to go swimming, but I told him no because I started my period and felt sore and crampy. He asked me if I could finish it before the end of the day so we could go swimming the next day…bruh, I wish it was that easy!
A guy once told me he know I was a virgin because my boobs were small. That boobs grow every time a woman has sex.
Zagar also said that when respondents were asked if they would feel comfortable discussing the menstrual cycle with their teenage daughter if they had one, 11% said they would not feel comfortable having that conversation, and 33% shared they would prefer to have a woman do it.
But there are good signs that came out of the survey too. While male knowledge of menstruation is minimal, a net 78% of respondents felt it was important to educate boys about periods and the menstrual cycle.
I'm at the store with my friend stocking up on pads, tampons, etc. As I'm putting boxes in the cart, my friend starts generally complaining about the prices. Understandable, so I agree. We finish up in the aisle and as we're walking away, a full grown 30-something looking man mumbles, "just hold your pee like everyone else." We were so taken back that we didn't even say anything. I never realized before this moment how utterly dense some people can be.
My (x) husband asked me why I hadn't had my period in awhile...... I was eight months pregnant.
My (female) bff (male) was my date to the prom. Because of my awful luck, I happened to be on my period.
As we exited my car, I grabbed a handful of tampons to toss in my clutch and my date asked me "Omg are you having 8 periods??"
Yeah he thought you used 1 tampon per menstrual cycle. If only- the $ I would have saved over the years!
According to INTIMINA's global brand manager, “the fact is that there is so much shame and taboos surrounding menstruation still today.” But most importantly, “Every individual should think about this and try to make a change - by having open conversations about this normal bodily function,” Zagar said.
“Intimina has been fighting period taboos for years and is doing so by educating and empowering women. Also, Intimina has recently issued The Wonder Girls Guide Book (and an audio version) to help young women prepare for womanhood and feel free of shame connected to periods. The survey on girls shows this is much needed as 53% of surveyed girls feel embarrassed and try to hide the fact they are menstruating while out with friends, 65% feel that way at school, 25% at home,” she told us.
A man once told me I was “too pretty” to have clinical depression. Not even kidding
Had a guy friend in college who seriously thought women leaked blue liquid during their periods, like what you see in maxi pad commercials.
Sometimes I'm really astounded at some men's lack of emotional intelligence. I used to think that was a made up stereotype to excuse men's rude/shitty behaviour, but a lot of men really have no idea how carelessly hurtful they can be.
One time a male coworker was telling me about how his girlfriend's apartment complex had a bedbug infestation, and how stressed the whole ordeal was making both of them. He then told me that this experience was really taking a toll on his mental health, and asked me if I thought she would understand if he asked her if they could take a break from seeing each other until "the whole bedbug thing was over." I was like dude, if you can't support her through this how can she expect you to ever stand by her through literally any other hardship in the future? He was adamant that "she wouldn't see it like that" and went ahead with his plan. They had a huge fight and she dumped him.
The fact that so many men believe women can't get pregnant by having sex during their period underlines the work we still have to do, Zagar argues.
“There's no doubt that we still need to destigmatize the talk around periods. People should not be bullied or teased for having periods, which are as natural as men growing hair. It's time to open up and be upfront and frank about what periods mean; in school, university and the workplace. So that we tackle period myths and everyone can appreciate the health concerns they can bring,” she explained.
“I prefer girls who wear little or no makeup”
*references girls with tons of (pink and neutral colored) makeup*
Once had a guy ask me if it "felt good" when I wipe after I pee. I wanted to be like, does it feel good when you hold your thing when you pee?
My 53 yr old ex husband could tell when I was attracted to other men cause my nipples would get hard (I never wear a bra) like dude, sometimes I get cold, and no that 87 yr old man trying his best not too fall over while walking isn’t doing it for me, trust me
Zagar concluded that “periods should be discussed as a normal function of the female body, and it should be called by its name, without euphemisms such as Aunt Flow. Talking and educating about it is the solution to breaking period taboos.”
I was told by an incel that women who have pre marital sex would have tendencies to cheat more than men who had the same. Boy is just mad he's in his 30s and still can't get laid.
When my ex and me discussed how the morning after pill worked and he was genuinely surprised that women don't know whether they are pregnant the day after unprotected sex. He was sure morning sickness would kick in the day after.
So, not only was he unaware how female bodies work, but also how Plan B works.
"You don't spontaneously generate a vaginal opening when your first period comes. You had your entire vagina at birth. No, I'm not pranking you."
"You don't insert tampons, of any size, into your pee hole.. No, that's NOT where the blood is coming from. Well actually.. Your urethra might be bleeding now if you've been trying to shove a tampon applicator up it.."
**Shortened versions of conversations with two of my female friends growing up**
I’m a gay girl. A guy once warned me not to date women who had been married, because I’d never be able to satisfy them.
Still not quite sure what he meant. But anyway, he was so wrong.
My (male) manager at a past job tried to tell me when I was pregnant that morning sickness shouldn't affect my work because it only happened in the morning.
An old boyfriend once explained that if I was having cramps, I just needed to do what his ex did: "there's this one yoga pose that will make that shift in the uterus that usually takes a few days happen in just a few minutes. It drops, and then your period is done in one day instead of four or five". He couldn't elaborate any further, (what "shifts"? What "drops"?) But he swore he was 100% right his ex cut her period down to one day with yoga.
I heard this with my own two poor ears from my own mother: "When a woman shaves her leg, hair shouldn't start growing until the next 4 or 5 days. Only men grow hair every day." MOOOM
The "men age like wine, women age like milk" phrase. Then you look at pics of women like Selma Hayek and Catherine Zeta-Jones and take a glance at most men around their age. Maybe, just maybe, some people are blessed with amazing genes while the rest of us look like dehydrated potatoes by the time we hit 40. Got nothing to do with genitals. I have only ever heard this phrase uttered by men who cannot seem to keep any woman around for more than a year at the time.
And in the spirit of equality I will say that there is definitely a female equivalent to this kind of attitude and they too cannot seem to keep a man.
If more sex meant looser vaginas, having a kid would mean a catastrophe down there. Clearly women have multiple kids, you’d think the logic was simple that it doesn’t work that way.
I was complaining about my period, and this awful guy goes "just p**s it out for f***s sake"
Guy thought he needed to use a condom with his pregnant gf so she didn't get pregnant again. ....like she could have two babies of different ages in her.
There was one guy online who tried responding to womens' complaints about expensive period products. He started by saying 'a tampon holds 4-12 mls of fluid... women lose about 40 mls per cycle ...
My boyfriend told me to shower in cold water so my period would temporarily stop
Basically anytime a teenage boy tries to describe anything in or about the female body or brain...
So confidently ignorant! So exquisitely condescending! Makes you want to pull your hair out some days...
When a guy commented on a post asking what woman think and said women only care about looks. Like sure, some people of either gender are like that. But I surely don’t care if he’s a 10/10 if he can’t hold a conversation.