“[Am I The Jerk] For Being Mad That My Stepdaughter Will Inherit Our House?”

There are plenty of real-life examples of people dating or marrying somebody older just for the money. Well, meaning that most probably they will inherit quite a lot of ‘nice things’ for a comfortable life. 

However, of course, not everybody marries just for the money. But still, once you get financially dependent on your partner, get used to having everything you want, spend all your time however you want and then find out that their house will go to their kids, meaning you will be homeless, well, that’s not a nice surprise.

More info: Reddit

It’s naïve of a wife to assume that her husband will not leave anything for his daughter and she will be the only heiress

Image credits: David Besh (not the actual photo)

Woman asks community members if she was being a jerk for getting mad that her step-daughter will be the one who inherits their house

Image credits: ZealousidealCow1669

She shares that just recently, her husband informed her that he is leaving their marital home to his daughter

Image credits: ZealousidealCow1669

Image credits: Cytonn Photography (not the actual photo)

She was upset, but her husband explained that this house belonged to his late wife, so she couldn’t expect him to leave it to anyone other than his daughter

Image credits: ZealousidealCow1669

Image credits: Arina Krasnikova (not the actual photo)

She kept pushing that it’s unfair as it’s her marital home, she put a lot of effort and time into decorating it

Image credits: ZealousidealCow1669

Image credits: Elina Sazonova (not the actual photo)

The whole situation led to a heated argument as the woman felt like her contributions to the house are being disregarded

Image credits: ZealousidealCow1669

Later on, she understood she was in the wrong and decided to apologize to both her husband and stepdaughter 

Recently, a Reddit user took her story to one of the most judgmental communities asking if she was being a jerk for causing drama after finding out that her stepdaughter is going to inherit their marital house, which belonged to her husband’s late wife, who got it from her parents. The post caught a lot of folks’ attention and after one day it got over 5.3K upvotes and 3.5K comments.

To begin with, just recently a woman found out that their home will be inherited by her husband’s daughter, which left her in complete shock. Well, the husband explained that the house belonged to his late wife who inherited it from her parents, so there is no way he is not leaving it to his daughter. However, OP still was furious as it’s their marital home which she spent a lot of time and effort redecorating and making her own.

Her husband explained that she is still the sole beneficiary of his life insurance and any savings left will be equally divided between her and his daughter. Unfortunately, this didn’t calm her down and the whole argument turned into a yelling fight. The woman kept screaming that she became a housewife for him and she deserves compensation, with her husband laughing and saying that he never asked her to do so and that they hired cleaners and housekeepers to do most of the chores.

However, after a while, OP added an edit saying that she understood that she was acting entitled and it’s her fault for assuming. She also assured commenters that she didn’t marry her husband for money. Moreover, OP highlighted that she is going to search for a job and apologize to both her husband and her stepdaughter.

The community members voted that OP was being a jerk in this situation. Most of them agreed that the woman was acting entitled as it’s not her home, she doesn’t do anything and can work but just doesn’t want to. “47 is NOT too old to go back to work. Heck, I know people who change careers at that age,” one user wrote.  “I don’t understand why she feels like he should not enjoy his retirement (with expensive cruises and holidays) just to ensure that she never has to work again,” another added.

Image credits: Max Rahubovskiy (not the actual photo)

Bored Panda got in touch with Nokwanda Dlamini, who is a marriage and family therapist, and she kindly agreed to share her insights regarding discussions and decisions about inheritance, especially for spouses with age disparities.

“Big differences in age between couples can mean differences in views of the world , maturity, responsibility and a lot of other factors. This then can cause some kind of rift or struggle when discussions like inheritance come up,” Nokwanda starts.

She advises that before a couple enters into a marriage, it’s important to try to look at all matters that could possibly affect them once married. They shouldn’t go in with uncertainty, assumptions or unspoken expectations as that can easily lead to much disappointment, hurt and even a divorce.

So let’s take this couple into consideration: the marriage therapist emphasizes that there could be some kind of fear from the man that whoever married him could be doing so in hope to cash in. Additionally, the situation is that this is his 2nd or more marriage and with the previous wife deceased, there could be still the need for him to protect her legacy.

Now, speaking about the situations in which one spouse feels financially vulnerable due to inheritance decisions, Nokwanda says that both parties must be open to communicate and discuss topics that concern them no matter how it makes them feel. “This should be accompanied by love and need to make the union stronger and not be only one party expressing their views and enforcing that only their views be heard.”

And finally, “empathy is a very important quality to have within a marriage, otherwise if not practiced one may find themselves behaving as narcissists.” It’s important to give an opportunity for your spouse to express themselves fully. “Their views and expressions may not be valid to you but they are valid to them and it’s important to hear them out and try to see why they are valid to them.”

Redditors shamed the author for her behavior, saying that she is only after his money

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