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“You can tell us anything, sweetie. We love you, and we just want what’s best for you.” Nice try, Mom. I’m not falling for that one!

No matter how close you are with your parents, you’ve probably concealed some information from them at one point or another. After all, do they really need to know about that tiny fender bender you got into or that you actually broke the vase that’s been mysteriously missing for years? Everyone keeps secrets, and sometimes, they hold onto them for a lifetime.

Redditors have been revealing information that they’ve sworn never to share with their parents, so we’ve gathered some of their juiciest replies below. From dark secrets that could destroy families to innocent little white lies, enjoy reading through these responses. And be sure to upvote the one that you’d keep from Mom and Dad too!

#1

Silhouette of a person looking out window at city buildings, symbolizing how I paid for college challenges and secrets. That I was about to commit s*****e but didn't simply because I was afraid it would fail and I would end up severely handicapped.

EDIT: Well this blew up a lot more than I expected, I'm not saying that I'm fine now but I'm definitely better. Thanks for all the supportive messages!

PMme10DollarPSNcode , Damir Samatkulov / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

woodswhispers
Community Member
5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is one I relate to. I've never told anyone irl about my attempts because I'm in a better spot now and it would only stir up bad feelings for them more than me. I hope OP is doing alright, still.

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    #2

    Patient holding intravenous drip pole in a hospital room, illustrating challenges in how I paid for college expenses. I still have cancer — my mom thinks I’m “cured” (she has Alzheimer’s so we’re not correcting her).

    vegancupcakes , Kateryna Hliznitsova / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Patrick H
    Community Member
    5 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, dàmn. I'm sorry they're going through that. A few years ago, my mother died suddenly of a heart attack at 69. Her brother, her sister, and I agreed that we wouldn't tell their 96yo mother because she had dementia and was probably not going to last much longer, anyway. She died, six months later. My mother had been putting the most effort into caring for my grandmother, so we like to light-heartedly joke that she died first to prepare heaven for her mother. That was a rough year.

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    #3

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way That my brother's truck wasn't *technically* broken in to. He accidentally locked his keys in the truck while shopping at goodwill for a tie for his interview he was on his way to. So he immediately called the insurance company telling them his car was broken into and was asking if it was covered. They said yes, so he takes the tire iron out of the bed of his truck and smashed his own window in to get his keys. Insurance fixed the window AND he got the job.

    MoodyBibarel , Macro.jr / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Heffalump
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, he didn't lie to them: the car was broken into, wasn't it?

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    #4

    Child in yellow sweater holding broken vase pieces, symbolizing challenges in paying for college secrets. When I was 7yo my mother broke a vase.

    I pretended to be the guilty just because i knew my dad would be angry with my mom and do s**t.

    therightsolution , cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    #5

    Close-up of hands in handcuffs symbolizing hidden college payment secrets and challenges faced by students paying for education. That my sister got arrested in college for stealing hay (to spread around a friends yard as a hearty f**k you). Had to find an ‘adult’ who knew how to bail her out bc I was 17 ... then wait for hours just to drive her drunk a*s back to he dorms.
    Her punishment from the judge was to volunteer at a local barn shoveling hay and horse poops around

    IckNoTomatoes , Curated Lifestyle / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

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    #6

    Forest pathway surrounded by green trees, symbolizing the journey of how I paid for college secrets. That I got lost in the woods hiking. The police had to rescue me. It was a whole big scene. I texted them with the little battery life I had on my phone and told them I was staying at a friends, so that they wouldn't worry. The police eventually found me, and I got home at 5AM. They thought I was at a friends, and I've never told them the story.

    Edit: As soon as I realized I was lost, I immediately called the police. I lied to my parents because I didn't want them to freak out, and I needed the phone battery to talk to the people trying to find me.

    robbothwell , Elisabeth Jurenka / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    arthbach
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you go exploring, install a GPS app, or 'What Three Words'. Contact the Police, and give your reference, then assuming it's safe, stay put and await rescue. This will make it so much easier for those trying to find you.

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    #7

    Close-up of a gold ring on a wooden surface symbolizing commitment and personal secrets related to paying for college. My grandmother had a collection of fairly expensive rings and when she died she left one to every woman in the family. I was 13 and told not to wear mine out of the house because it was a bit loose on me. I did and lost it within a month of her death. Every now and then my mom asks about it and I'm just like "yeah it's in a box in one of my drawers, I don't wear it because I don't want to lose it.".

    ihopeyoulikeapples , Roman Derrick Okello / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Julia Mckinney
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, back in 1987, my nice, cheap watch broke so my dad, the surgeon & hobbyist tree farmer who also repaired clocks and watches, just because; decided to give me a watch. I lost it the third day I wore it and then discovered it was a vintage, 14k gold designer piece. I told my dad to never give me something that expensive again to just wear around town. He learned and got me nice cheap, plastic watches.

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    #8

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way I'm glad my grandfather is dead. He was a*****e, but I don't think my parents realized the extent of it.

    anon , Rhodi Lopez / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Patrick H
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One of the parents probably knows how abùsive he was. (Also, fùck BP for blocking important words, like abùsive. People need to be able to talk about that even if it's only in the Internet.)

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    #9

    Young person looking thoughtfully out a window, reflecting on how they paid for college and financial secrets. My parents are divorced and my mum used to tell me to ask my dad for money, for my hobbies, activities, etc. I never told her I stopped doing that when I was 15 because I was told that I was the reason his wife couldn't buy herself anything nice. It was/is all complete and utter b******t.

    BlackEbolaCat , Jaturawit Thumrongkitcharoenkul / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Val
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What a tool of a dad. Being stuck between divorced parents sucks.

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    #10

    Close-up of a gold trophy symbolizing success in how I paid for college with hidden secrets revealed. When I was like 10-12 I threw a soccer trophy at my door during a tantrum. It put a hole in my side, but not all the way through.

    I stuck a bumper sticker for my favorite college team over it.

    I'm 28 and it's still there.

    anon , Robin Edqvist / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Patrick H
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At first, I read that as them having a hole in the side of their body and using a bumper sticker as a bandage.

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    #11

    Young man sitting in sunlight by a window, reflecting on challenges of how I paid for college secrets. Lately, everything I do. They have a nasty habit of giving unsolicited advice and judgment in everything I tell them, even after explicitly telling them how much it bothers me when they do. So they ask, and I don't answer.

    GenitalFurbies , Min An / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    #12

    Surgeon in protective gear performing surgery while explaining how I paid for college secrets during medical training. When I was a junior in college, I lived off campus with five other guys in a shady neighborhood. One Tuesday night while a few of us were high and watching tv, a couple thugs busted our door, broke in, and robbed us at gunpoint. They were looking for a d**g dealer. It turns out they had the wrong house; the dude from whom everyone at school bought their weed, c**e, and pills lived one house over. (None of us ratted him out because that would've brought more trouble)

    These guys tore our place apart looking for our nonexistent stash, and when they couldn't find anything, they grabbed some random worthless decorations, getting antsy to bounce. One of my roommates- big, burly, but usually reserved- grabbed one of the guys as they were leaving. He must've snapped. The thug turns around and lets two shots fly that both hit my friend: one in the leg, the other in the gut.

    He lived but was in the hospital recuperating for a month. None of us were able to recover from what happened, so after the short, fruitless investigation was over, we withdrew from school and went home.

    I stayed until the end of the semester. When I went home, I just told my parents that I wanted to transfer to a school closer to home. I never told them why I made that decision. I have two younger brothers. I didn't want my parents to be afraid to send them away to school; I didn't want my brothers to be afraid to leave home and explore.

    EDIT: Holy canoli, this kind of thing happens a lot more at college campuses than I realized. For those wondering how my parents haven't found out, this was fifteen years ago. AIM was social media. I've told friends and cousins, but the story never made it back to my parents.

    ChillyChileChili , Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Patrick H
    Community Member
    5 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was in college, I lived in the college apartments. Each apartment had a common area (living room and kitchen) and four private, lockable rooms. Three of us became friends, and the fourth guy was okay but didn't hang out with us much. We almost never locked the front door because someone was usually there (or at least on campus), and we let friends come hang out even if we weren't there. The one and only time the front door was locked because everybody happened to be off campus, somebody busted in. Nothing seemed to be stolen from the common area. My friends and I think somebody was trying to get into the fourth guys room. We were pretty sure that he was the only one that used drùgs, so we think somebody might have been trying to get to his stash. Any of our acquaintances would've known that the door would be unlocked on any other day.

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    #13

    Close-up of old beige prison bars and lock with a small table and bowl in the background inside a cell. That the month i was "living a month in Spain" was actually spent in jail. I had friends to post fake Instagram pictures for me too

    Edit: Wow, would never expect such a response! Since so many of you have been asking heres some more info:
    I was sentenced to 1 month for DUI and the month I was supposed to do my sentence happened to be at the same time as I was actually going to Spain for a month. So instead of traveling to Spain, I went to jail. No questions ever asked from my family. Now, I knew my friends would notice, so I had to tell them and they were the best and helped me keeping this a secret. This was the first (and last) time I had ever been into any trouble.
    Most awkward bit was to figure out excuses for not driving the following year.

    Im from Norway btw, so sorry if I messed up prison/jail.

    WorldWideWeb03 , Grant Durr / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    XenoMurph
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they didn't ask any questions, they know.

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    #14

    Person wearing a dark hoodie and face mask outdoors, symbolizing secrets about how I paid for college. My dad recently asked me how I paid for my college when he knows I don't have a job. I'm never going to tell him that I became a local d**g lord for 24 months and moved hundreds of lb's of pot through frat houses and cashed out when I was free of student loans.

    anon , Enjon Chakraborty / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Pyla
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    selling drvgs to frat houses is like picking dandelions in May.

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    #15

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way My mom doesn’t know that the mental/emotion a***e she inflicted on me as a child almost made me k**l myself at thirteen/fourteen. She is a very big denier of these actions and manipulations during my childhood but I’ve gone through therapy and have made my peace. We have a decent relationship now but it will never be what I have with my father. He’s the reason I stayed on this earth and even then I don’t even think he realizes that he literally saved my life when I asked him to fight for my custody at fifteen. I think he knows to some extent but I don’t want to ever ask if he knew bc I know how painful it is for him, he already struggles with the fact that he didn’t fight for me when they split (I was three). He chose to let me decide for myself and didn’t want me to resent him for taking me away from her without my own decision. I hit my breaking point and he jumped into action with a lawyer and saved my life. I try my hardest to reassure him that he was trying his best and regardless I still turned out okay but I know he still beats himself up over it.

    seabreezesqueeze , Ivonne Lecou / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    kissmychakram
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't think this is decision a 3 year old should be making. Dad's excuse sounds lame to me.

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    #16

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way When I was about 8 my little sister and I broke a candy jar. We told our stepmom when she called and she said “it’s okay, throw away all the candy it’s old anyways.” Being the unsupervised children we were, we ate every last piece, probably about 300+ pieces of candy total. The next day we were throwing up all day and our parents assumed it was the flu. We didn’t touch another piece of candy for several months after that

    CrispyGingers Report

    Bec
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hurray for a not wicked stepmom!

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    #17

    Airplane flying above clouds over the ocean, symbolizing freedom and ways to pay for college. That I am currently in a long-distance relationship with a woman twice my age who lives across the country. And that I'm flying out to go see her, not to go on a spontaneous vacation. (I'm in my 20's).

    Throwitallthway101 , Alexander Mils / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

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    #18

    People riding a city bus focused on their journeys, illustrating college life and secrets of how to pay for college. I skipped college for like 4 months
    I was studying to become an english translator. The first month there was so f*****g bad, I couldnt stand the subjects, and as I hadnt finished high school yet(exams left), I could not keep going to college anyways.
    So i spent the next months pretending I was going to class, while actually taking really long bus trips back and forth and reading books near the river.
    Its the douchiest thing Ive done and I cant let my parents know.
    EDIT for some context:
    It was a public college anyways, but my parents wanted me to get a degree and a job as fast as possible. We're pretty poor and have been without internet since my parents divorced(posting from my phone).

    anon , Mitchell Johnson / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Robert Beveridge
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I... bruh I know this was a terrible situation but if you're gonna do this sort of thing, reading books by the river sounds positively Utopian.

    #19

    Pregnant woman in a grey sleeveless dress gently holding her belly against a dark background about paying for college. I am from the UK, when I was 16 I was holidaying in Mexico and ended up banging this American girl. Flew home and obviously thought that's that, we literally live thousands of miles away I'll never hear from her again. I'm 25 now and two years ago I got a message on facebook from her saying that she got pregnant and had the baby and that I have a son, she sent me some pictures and he does actually look like me.

    I wouldn't even consider telling my parents about this until I have absolute proof that the kid is mine, but even then it would break their hearts to know they have a 9 year old grandson they never saw. At the minute I'm kind of just playing it by ear.

    UPDATE: While I appreciate the sentiment of most of your comments please try and appreciate the difficulty of my situation. Being this far away really does cause a lot of problems and it's just scary to be honest, however, the majority of you were right I did need to do something so I went and found an American company that will collect a DNA sample from me in London and then conduct the paternity test in the US and send the results individually to both me and her so I guess I really did just need to get off my a**e and do something. I suppose I'll be finding out sooner rather than later.

    IronTarkus91 , Rene Alsleben / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    Heir of Durin
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Checked Reddit for an update. This post is 10 years old, and OP didn’t provide an update.

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    #20

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way I’ve been married for 6 years. My husband and I have been together almost 40 years but we were crazy kids who didn’t need a piece of paper to prove our love. After a health scare my husband’s sister made a comment that implied she had a closer legal relationship than I did. It was offhanded but it made us think. We already had wills, medical power of attorney, etc., paperwork done but we decided to get married just to make it more cut and dry. Only a few people know we’re married. Our kids and a couple of close friends. And now some people on Reddit.

    designgoddess , Andre Tan / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is playing the long game and I don't wish a speedy death but would love to know what happened when sister found out she didn't in fact have a share...

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    #21

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way I broke my moms waterbed having s*x, the same night she came home really drunk and when she woke up in the morning she thought she did and didn't remember.

    Knot_My_Name , Photographed by Robert Paprstein / Wikipedia (not the actual photo) Report

    Agfox
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Didn't take off their spurs - rookie mistake when using a waterbed

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    #22

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way When my dad and I lived with his then fiance years ago, her oldest daughter and I used to fool around.

    percocet_20 , Edward Cisneros / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    #23

    Hand holding a cotton swab with a blurred background, related to how I paid for college secrets. My mom found some used cotton swabs in the shower covered in a brownish red substance, she thought it was battery acid. She wanted to know what it was. She asked everyone in the house, no one knew. For some reason, it really bothered her. She went ballistic over it. 'Someone in this house knows what this is!!! They didn't just appear out of thin air!!!!' Nobody knew. Later that day, it dawned on my that they were probably the qtips I used to clean out my ear (had a pimple or something) and it was dried blood. She was so mad, I didn't want to confess. So I never told her. I am now 45 and still haven't told her. She has even brought it up a few times over the years. I'm taking this one to my grave.

    h0lleyb , Sara Groblechner / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

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    #24

    Woman in lace dress showing tattooed arm, symbolizing personal stories on how paid for college secrets revealed. That I have a tattoo. It's been 4.5 years and they have never seen it.

    _ohhello , Murilo Simoes / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    Beak Hookage
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't tell my mum when I get a new tattoo because she Doesn't Approve of them. She's seen most of them but there's a HUGE one on my left shoulder she knows nothing about because I never wear sleeveless tops. It's gone unnoticed for so long it's actually gotten pretty funny.

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    #25

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way My dad always comments on how confident and chill I seem. I’m usually experiencing a lot of anxiety, mostly about money and my future. Hard to let those feelings show, though.

    Edit: it’s great a feeling to see that there are so many other people out there who experience this same feeling.

    Youngurb , Carolina / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Robert Beveridge
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maskmaking: one of the core skills of anyone with anxiety.

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    #26

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way I watched all 8 seasons of GOT without my parents knowing. My mom would never let me watch it but I told my dad after I was done and we talk about it all the time when she’s not around

    Macro_Knight Report

    Wild Cream
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My parents let me watch whatever as a youth in the 2000s - Family Guy, South Park, The Simpsons, whatever. But for whatever reason I was not allowed to watch The Addams Family 😅😂 so that’s the show I sneakily watched when no one was around

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    #27

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way I was only about 9-10. When my older brother would get home from high school he would constantly ring the door bell for me to open the door. He has his own keys but he just kept ringing. It annoyed me almost everyday.

    One day I start yelling out to open it himself.

    He kicks the window by the door, it shatters and a tiny shard cuts my foot. No big deal, just a band aid fix.

    We call mum and dad saying someone threw a rock, and my brother even found a rock outside as evidence. Mum and dad call the police later when they get home, police arrive, there's a full report done.

    And my brother and I have never mentioned the story again.

    I'm glad that it wasn't some hard core detective s**t, where he asked how I injured my foot.

    jsntco , Eyasu Etsub / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Anonymous
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your older brother sounds like an a*****e

    Saphyre Fyre
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is he doing all that when he has keys to get in??

    arthbach
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It appears a 9 - 10 year old child was left alone in the house. This is not acceptable.

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    #28

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way That my little sister didn't break her arm by accidentally falling off the bunk bed, but rather that she broke her arm when we flung her off of it during a game of King of the Hill (bunkbed)

    My parents were out at aerobics class, in a very pre-cell phone age. We just tried to keep her comfortable and waited patiently for them to get home.

    We did finally tell them last year, and they thought it was hilarious. We kept that secret for close to 30 years.

    uwila , Curated Lifestyle / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Beak Hookage
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I misread this as "punkbed" and my mind went to all kinds of interesting places.

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    #29

    Gold earrings with blue heart-shaped crystals displayed on white textured fabric for how I paid for college tips. I stole my moms earrings to give to my girlfriend in 3rd grade. She never found them....

    SuperStone412 , Valentina Jorio / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Wild Cream
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reason #1289 that I’m glad I don’t have kids 😅

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    #30

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way I’m a teen and they’re somewhat strict - they don’t let me have my phone after 10:00 at night. So I found my moms old phone, reset it, set it up with my ID so that it would forward text messages from my normal phone to it, and I keep it in my room.

    Edit: back when I had the apple restrictions on my phone I also found a way to disable those

    kallenl8 , Akshar Dave🌻/ Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Orysha
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't find these rules very strict. I just think Op doesn't like to listen to their parents.

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    #32

    Person lying in bed covered with white sheets, relaxing in a softly lit room, illustrating college life moments. I had s*x with my cousin when we were in high school. Twice.

    FAQ edit:

    I actually went to high school four times: freshman, sophomore, junior, and senior years.

    It was very much consensual.

    It occurred after no longer being able to ignore sexual tension while hanging out together (just the two of us; great friendship; eventually got aroused). We lived under the same roof for a couple of years.

    MySixInchTaint , iam_os / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Elio
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm gald it was consensual but I still gotta play the 🎵banjo music🎵

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    #33

    Crinkled textured paper close-up showing details of folds and shadows in a neutral gray tone background. I shot myself in the leg when I was 8 and fixed the hole with a wad of toilet paper and some duct tape. There's still metal in there 20 years later.

    edit: I'm going to answer some of the more common questions here so they stop getting asked.

    * In my memory the bullet was huge, but in reality was likely just a .22LR.
    * I have since seen a doctor, when I was 15, and he said the remaining metal wasn't worth the risks of removal. It's inert and mostly embedded in my shin. (This makes me like 0.00001% more Wolverine than you)
    * The wad of toilet paper was actually 2 whole rolls of it, but at least half of it was flushed to hide the evidence.
    * The fragments are too small to set off metal detectors. Next time I go through I'll ask them to wand my leg and see if the wands can sense it though.

    The story is pretty boring. My cousin and I were messing around with a fire behind his garage. Making flame throwers out of things that we're lucky didn't explode in our hands, like WD-40 cans and the like. In our horsing around my gun, actually I think it was my cousin's gun, was knocked into the fire and I fished it out. While inspecting it I accidentally shot myself. This all happened pretty late at night the evening before a wedding so all the adults were wasted and we snuck into the downstairs bathroom to tend the wound.

    Seems to be a right of passage in my family. My dad was shot for the first time when he was 9. Some crazy guy in a boat with a shotgun who ended up having to spend 2 nights in jail for it. My dad shot himself when he was 15, in the foot, and all the blood made his little brother feint so my dad had to carry his little brother out of the bush with a hole through his boot. So I come by the gun shot wounds honestly, at least.

    Killergoodbye , M. X. / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    OhnoI’vebeencensored
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like you should tell them, they probably think you’re a pathetic loser for never having shot yourself.

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    #34

    Stack of rare Charizard trading cards in protective sleeves, illustrating a unique way people paid for college expenses. When I was in 3rd grade, I found polaroids of my parents getting down and dirty on their honeymoon. Being the dip s**t that I was, I brought them to school and traded them to one of my friends for a holographic Charizard card. They never found out. I still have the card. I win.

    anon , Erik Mclean / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    Val
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂I wonder if the parents were the ones taking the pictures.

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    #35

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way When we were in middle/high school, my younger brother used to get in trouble at school a lot. Whenever the school called our house to to inform my parents, I would answer the phone and pretend to be my dad.

    sidestreetdrew , Dan Dennis / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    Wild Cream
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My school sent out automated recorded messages around 4:15 every day for students who missed attendance without notice or had detention. My parents got home around 4:20, so you know my siblings and I were always gathered around the phone sweating and hoping the school called first so we could answer and then hang up 😅

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    #36

    Person holding a gaming controller showing secrets on how I paid for college in a casual home setting. It not actually an online game. I can pause it.

    Cruzin-Downtown , JÉSHOOTS / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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    #38

    40 Things Kids Kept Secret From Their Parents And Intend To Keep It That Way When i was younger i went to walmart and my brother was in charge of me.Well i loved to run away from him while he chases me,anyway a man grabbed me while i was running and my brother saved me some how.So i was almost kidnapped.

    xXSome_GuyXx , Caique Morais / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

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    #39

    Person holding multiple US dollar bills in both hands counting money related to paying for college expenses. In 1989 I got a tax return in the mail for $250. I was 13 at the time. I opened up a bank account and deposited the money.

    My parents probably sold some stocks for my college account and overpaid the irs.

    anon , Kaboompics.com / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    Rika
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sure, 1989 was a long time ago, but I'd like to know how a 13 year old was allowed to open a bank account without a legal guardian present. Especially when depositing money from the government. Surely, someone at the bank would realize a kid that young isn't supposed to deal with that kind of stuff ?!

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    #40

    White and brown bulldog lying on a dark gray rug in a living room, illustrating how I paid for college secrets concept. My dog ate a whole pot cookie i left out once. My mom thought the neighbors tried to poison my dog by throwing something in a ziploc bag over the fence since the poor pup was falling over and 'fainting'. In reality the pup stole my friday night from me.

    gnargnar666 , Pixabay / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    arthbach
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    'the pup stole my Friday night' - no. You poisoned your dog! Your lack of care could have killed the poor dog. How dare you complain about the dog.

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    #41

    My younger sister went to a party in High School and got black out drunk. She was staying the night with a friend that night, and her Mom brought her home about 2 in the morning. Me and my younger brother carried her into our house to her basement bedroom. I locked her in her room, set my alarm for 6am, and got a few hours of sleep. I got her up the next morning, she was still drunk, snuck her out the backdoor. She walked about a mile to a gas station, called her friend who came and picked her up. My Mom picked her up around noon.


    When she passed out, she fell and scraped her temple and cheek. My Mom questioned her, she claimed she'd gotten in a fight.


    30 years later, my Mom was reminiscing about that night and the fight. We spilled the beans, my Mom was stunned that we got away with it because she was such a light sleeper and I never got away with any kind of deception as a teen.

    dcjohnson50 Report

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    #42

    Close-up of a car speedometer and dashboard showing trip mileage and outside temperature at 32 degrees. TL;DR Stole my dads car when I had no licence and then had to race him home so that I didn't get caught with it. Made it.

    When I was 17 I went to court and lost my licence for what ended up being 4 years, that part they knew about.

    One day, when I was 18 and living in a flat with a friend about 15kms away from where my parents lived at the time, I decided that I was going to get up early the next day, catch a train and a bus back to their place early the next morning to get my car which was in there garage.

    Long story short, I got really high and stayed up until about 3am. At this point I decided that I'd be better off staying up because I'd probably sleep through my 7am alarm and waste the day. Left my place at about 6am instead for the 2hr journey. Got to my parents at around 8, after they'd left for work.

    When I got there I found that my father had taken my car to work and left his car at home. Not wanting to waste the day I decided to take his car. First thing I drove back to my place where I was going to have a shower and get ready.

    Got home and sat down on the lounge and it turns out that I was way more tired than I'd thought. Probably had something to do with getting high all night instead of sleeping. I fell asleep.

    I awake to the sound of my phone ringing, it's 6:30pm and my father is calling me. I panic and pick up the phone thinking I was busted. He was downstairs at my place, there to drop something off to me that I'd asked for earlier in the week. I grab his car keys from the table, stuffed them in my pocket and ran downstairs to meet him.

    As soon as I was done talking with him I walked until I was out of sight and then bolted to his car which is parked 2 streets away. I got in the car and floored it, taking a different root back to his rather than the one I knew he'd take. I called my friend who lived about half way between my parents place and mine, I pleaded with him to jump in the car and get to my parents place to pick me up. I explained as much as I could in the short time that I had.

    I called my father and asked him to stop and check if I'd left some shoes or something in the boot of my car. After some convincing he stopped to look for the non existent boots. I went screaming past the the one intersection I knew our paths could cross and raced to his place.

    Parked the car in the driveway, jumped in my mates car and saw him driving out of his street. Luckily he didn't see me. I will never tell him this. Ever.

    Noobpooner , Lance Gauer / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    John Mosley
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Could have fessed up, your car was at your home since dad was driving it, dad's there, his car was there for him to drive home. Lot of running around just to perpetuate a lie.

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    #43

    That my little brother didnt break his arm playing baseball. He broke his arm while we were sword fighting with baseball bats and I saw a shot and I took it.

    Rickrickrickrickrick Report

    #44

    My brother is asexual.

    My dad is one of the macho, Don Draper types who used to chase his secretaries around the desk back in the day so I always made up a bunch of b******t stories about all the poontang my bro used to pull in college just to impress the old man.

    laterdude Report

    arthbach
    Community Member
    5 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How incredibly sad! I hope this sort of cráp dies out soon. (Edited to evade the stupid censorship.)

    #45

    That my first hospitalization for s******l ideation was actually an attempt. It would break my mom's heart.

    mysterious_passerby Report

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    #46

    That I share a bed (and more) with my "roommate."

    IAmTheOneAndOnlyOz Report

    #47

    Sister and I were once playing with our little brother and throwing him onto our parent's bed. I was holding his feet, she was holding his hands, on the third swing we would let him go flying onto the king sized water bed. On one throw, sister was laughing too much and let go of brother's hands right at the bottom of the swing. I ended up swinging him by his feet into the bottom of a bed post. His head was split open a quarter inch or so, bled as head wounds do. We cleaned everything up and convinced him to stop crying by the time that mom and dad got home. He was maybe 5 at the time.

    Sultan_of_Slide Report

    Anonymous
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's disguisting of you to do

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    #48

    First time I saw a naked woman, I was with my grandpa. He showed me the photos.



    Edit: I feel like I need to tell my parents now, because this thread is awesome.

    anon Report

    #49

    I took care of some minor debt he had with some shady d**g dealer that had him in trouble. He died last month (unrelated) and took it to the grave. There’s no point telling them now so I will too.

    itchy_cat Report

    arthbach
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is a secret to keep. Telling people won't make anything better. It will just hurt those he loved. Keep the secret.

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    #50

    Close-up of purple flowers growing in a garden, illustrating natural beauty and peaceful outdoor scenery. I once took too much Salvia and was gone for 70 years







    Edit: Got alot of questions about my experience and decided to type it out

    Long story short:

    I traveled trough the universe, ended up on the other side of it. Was a part of a intergalactic counsel and represented humanity. After explaining earth and humanity to them in their own language that they taught me, I traveled back and crash-landed in my friends sofa as a completely empty shell, everything about me was gone.


    I started with the classic "Where am I, Who are you...Who am I?"
    They started talking to me but I did not understand the language, so I thought to myself "Hah, you sound so silly"

    Then my whole life flashed in-front of my eyes and I was back to "normal"

    F****d up s**t.

    anon , Amber Wolfe / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

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    #51

    I got hit by a snowplow (rather, the snow coming off the plow) while building a snow fort right next to the road. Shot out of the fort and tossed 10 feet away. I still hate plows.

    peaceisnotpassive Report

    #52

    Close-up of a Game Boy Advance and a Pokemon game cartridge, illustrating creative ways to pay for college expenses. I used to play my game boy advanced every night for about 2 years, never told my parents and certainly don't plan on it.

    Edit: I should mention it was the SP variant, so there was no battery/lighting problems for me.

    Dragonairsniper , Bos Navarit / Pexels (not the actual photo) Report

    #53

    Two skunks near a tree trunk in a forest, illustrating how I paid for college with unexpected secrets revealed. I take my dog out to play fetch one day in the summer

    we play behind my house in the meadow it is by the edge of the forest anyways my dog run away into the forest i chase after him and i find him in a skunk den getting eaten by the skunks

    i tell my mom he get lost in the forest and i never did find him

    i do not tell my mom i did find him but he was a skunk lunch.

    sylmond_duda , Bryan Padron / Unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

    John Mosley
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very tiny dog? Error in the translation? I'm very confused, if it's skunk the dog should have just come back stinky.

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    #54

    I've spent over $1000 dollars on s*x toys for myself in the span of 2 years.

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    Val
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it's your money, then 🤷‍♀️

    #55

    My car got towed today, right after finding a new apartment. Still don’t know if I should be happy or sad

    Cypressive Report