50 Hilariously Relatable Tweets That Perfectly Sum Up The Human Experience

Same

I need more money and therapy

Please see my comment earlier about being too honest. Uhg.

very true.... don't say "yes" when you mean "no" to someone and visa versa, you're not sparing their feelings (not that anyone has the right to decide your feelings or you theirs) "I'm an adult Im responsible for my own emotions thank you"....it might seem counterintuitive but it does show respect for the other person, it's also honest open and clear (any good confidence,self esteem and wellbeing courses/group will teach this as standard)

User: "Hello" Me: "What can I do you for?" Saves all that tedious socialising when they just want me to do something !

Normalize answering "generic excuse" when you don't want to meet someone or come to some event.

people want the truth but never want the scars

Online dating. I made it very clear on my profile that I had no desire to date someone with young children/shared custody. Guy#3 was a great fit. We had the same interests and enjoyed our time together. After about 6 weeks he tells me he has 2 sons, aged 6 & 8 and he shares custody with his ex wife. I was furious. Like literally stunned into silence. I guess he thought he was so wonderful that I wouldn't mind. Boy was he wrong. I had a NIGHTMARE experience with my stepchildren (4) and vowed I would never do it again. He told me at dinner one night. I picked up my purse and before walking out said (louldy) "thank you for lying to me and wasting 2 months of my life, you f*cking piece of sh*t".

I can relate to that.

Yes!!! listen phone etiquette is different these days. Don't leave me a voicemail unless you're a bot. I'll just assume your bot anyway. Text me. And if you want to call text to ask when is good. I literally get a pit in my stomach seeing a call. I immediately think someone died.

Self destruction can be fun to make fun of. I laugh at myself alot.

Childhood memories of me and my siblings laying down in bed when it rained hard, mostly the monsoon season back in the country, just laying there hearing the rain dropping on the roof, feeling that comfort, falling asleep, waking up and falling asleep again, happy times-happy memories

when you need sleep but the sleep dont need you 😘✌🏻 edit: why was i downvoted 😭

This is me. Can't shut me up sometimes, but out of nowhere I could disappear for months on end and just be back like nothing happened.

I can't flirt either, I interrogate men to check compatibility

Oh yes! And also when you wake up and think it must be nearly time to get up but, no, you've still got a couple of hours to snooze.

that one person who you feel safe with >>

My family has a delusional view of me, so I do what I can to avoid them.

My anxiety won't let me argue via text for fear of a massive miscommunication.

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that's for you to answer, Doc

Leaving home ruins my whole day

Or, I just want to eat my lunch in peace

I'll straight up ask. I've gone on several 1st-2nd dates and it sort of ended there. I'll attempt to ask what, if anything, turned them off. Red flags, etc. Honesty is a common complaint, I don't get it.

Some intros just don’t help the song.

Welcome to the club

"I am what I am."

People who show me new podcasts are important. People who show me to books are important.

Im 14 and this is deep

Missed a spot!

I sleep a lot because I’m really good at it. In fact I’m so good I can do it with my eyes closed

That never goes/ends well.

Depression do be that way.

I can handle your overthinking any day, I just can't handle my own....

Same. I hate that some phones do the "read" thing. I don't need you to know that I'm ignoring you.

I’m patting myself on the back because my old a**e actually can make all that out

Safe place/Happy place and my dog is there sometimes.

Omg is that what happened. I over healed!!

I miss the friend my ex was before we gut together

Depends on what the effort is for doesn't it?

welp, this seems to all be in order then

Same goes for Halloween. Scariest costume you can wear is the failed adult one.

yea, but it still hurts.

*See the other comment about romantic sh1t happening.

silence can be the ultimate expression of disgust

too late

Yup. Always.

Every. American. Every. Single. Moment. Of. Every. Single. Day.

Good one 👍

Yeah, that tends to be the consensus when you have been lied to most of your life...

Not me, I ruin it.

Trauma can make you grow up fast.

There is two of this one on here. Edit: three

until I got to know you, and became a zombie

Yes but watch out for blunt force trauma. It will happen if you take to many hits

Yeah, silence says alot.

I don’t want your attention but i end up getting it due to something stupid i did

“We’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty…”