Kids. Some folks want to have ‘em. Some folks don’t. Either way, it can be a sore and embarrassing topic of discussion with family members. Especially around the holidays. But if you think you’re feeling pressured to have kids by your loved ones, you’d better check again because things might not be as bad for you as for some.
Redditor Doesnotcontributes shared the story of how her entire family got into a massive argument before Christmas. Her parents wrote her out of their will because she was the only one of her three other siblings not having kids.
So in response, the woman demanded that her family members leave her house. Later, she let them know very clearly that she wouldn’t be hosting Christmas at her house this time. The redditor then turned to the ‘Am I the Assh*le’ subreddit for their advice whether she was justified in doing what she did.
A woman shared her story of how she ruined her family’s Christmas because her parents cut her out of the will
Image credits: Ken Mayer (not the actual photo)
Why did they do that? Well, their daughter wasn’t having kids
Image credits: doesnotcontributes
Doesnotcontributes’ post got removed from the subreddit because it breached the community’s rule on not posting revenge stories. However, the story can still be found hiding, lurking, deep in the dark corners of the internet (Twitter and Imgur).
The vast majority of redditors thought that Doesnotcontributes was not in the wrong and blamed her family for believing that the only way to ‘contribute’ is by having kids. However, some internet users thought that she could have responded more calmly. While others thought that the entire family was to blame.
The holiday season can be a rough time and cause a lot of arguments because of how different reality is from high expectations. According to Dr. Zoe Shaw, some parents can be very inflexible because they expect that each and every Christmas Eve and Christmas Day should be spent with the extended family, even when everyone’s all grown up. However, spending all that time just with your family can be exhausting. Everyone needs some basic boundaries and some time to be alone to unwind.
Meanwhile, Yesenia Almonte writes that telling your family members that you don’t want to have kids is especially difficult in some communities. For example, if you’re Hispanic, there are certain traditional expectations that you will create a family.
Dr. Ellen Walker explains that one of the best things that you can do if you don’t want to have kids is to have a clear and solid understanding of the reasons why you’re choosing to do what you do. She also suggests that when talking about your choices to others that you be assertive but not confrontational or trying to control the beliefs of others. After all, it’s not about being right; it’s about understanding one another.