7 Examples Of Toxic “Nice” Behavior Shamed Online

Dating expert Dan Bacon, the founder of The Modern Man project, was kind enough to share his thoughts about rejection, neediness, and asking someone on a date with Bored Panda. He noted that if your emotional state depends on how another person reacts, behaves, or treats you, then you can be considered to be needy.

"The key to not being needy is to be emotionally independent. This means that you are confident, happy, and secure in yourself regardless of how others behave around you. If you can only be confident, happy, and secure in yourself when people are treating you well, encouraging you, or supporting you, then you are needy," he explained.

Meanwhile, the dating expert pointed out that people should "realize that no woman is compatible with every man she meets and no man is compatible with every woman he meets."

"However, if a man is getting rejected on a regular basis by women he likes, he should consider learning about how a woman’s attraction works, so he will be more attractive and appealing to a high number of women," Dan, from The Modern Man, told Bored Panda.

"For example: Many men who become angry when rejected are those who mistakenly think that they need to be as nice as possible and then the woman will like them. It’s a naive understanding of women that causes so many men to feel angry and insulted when they don’t get what they want after being very nice to women," he said.

"A man needs to understand that women don’t choose a man based on who is the nicest. A woman does want a good man, but she is also looking to experience a feeling called attraction, rather than just feeling neutral or nice around a guy who is only focused on being nice. When a guy knows how to make women feel attracted during interactions (e.g. by flirting in a confident, charming way), he will see that more women like him," the dating expert shared that niceness alone doesn't necessarily lead to attraction.

In Dan's opinion, men should learn how to ask a woman out in the right way. Playfulness and ease, instead of seriousness, are key. "Some men ask women out in a way that is too serious and definite, which results in a woman feeling the need to keep her guard up. A man needs to be more relaxed and easygoing when asking a woman out, rather than coming across in a way where he is essentially saying, 'If you say yes to going on a date with me, then we are going to be boyfriend and girlfriend."

The dating expert revealed to us that a first date should be a more relaxed meetup "where the two people will have a chat, see if there’s any chemistry and take it from there."

"So, it's better for a man to say something like, 'Hey, we should catch up for a coffee sometime this week,' rather than, 'Would you like to go out on a date with me?' Some women are fine with being asked out on a date if they have a high level of interest in a man, but if they don't, a date will seem too serious and she may decline."

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