“No Arguments Ok?”: Teen Left On The Street After Mom’s BF Moves In

Almost every child eventually leaves their proverbial nest and starts building their own life. However, it can come as a shock if your parents suddenly decide that you have to leave, with no absolutely warning.

That’s what happened to one teenager, whose mom kicked them out the moment they turned 18, so that she could move her new boyfriend in instead. The distressed young adult asked the ‘AmIOverreacting’ community for help after sharing that they’re in tears, with no clue what to do, thinking that this is “probably the worst day” of their life. You’ll find the full story, including the teen’s message conversation with their mom, and the internet’s advice, below.

Being forced to leave home when you have no job or a place to stay, with no warning, is devastating

Woman sitting on bed covering her face with hands, distressed about mom throwing her child out on the street for a random guy.

Image credits: Diligent_Bat_565 (not the actual photo)

A teenager who just turned 18 shared the conversation they had with their mom who kicked them out

Text message conversation showing a mom telling her child to leave for a random guy moving in, highlighting family conflict.

Text message exchange about giving permission and encouragement related to a mom throwing her child out on the street.

Text message exchange showing a child feeling abandoned by mom for a random guy with crying emoji expressing sadness.

Text message conversation showing a child confused and upset about being forced to leave the house by their mom.

Text message conversation about covering a phone and legal requirements after throwing child out on the street.

Image credits: Diligent_Bat_565

Text from an 18-year-old whose mom is throwing them out for her new boyfriend, expressing feelings of shock and confusion.

Text on a white background describing uncertainty about a man dating someone's mother and wanting to move in.

Text post about feeling overwhelmed, mentioning mom throws child out on the street and legal concerns.

Image credits: Diligent_Bat_565

Independence doesn’t appear overnight. It’s something that parents help their children build gradually, over years

While asking your child to leave home when they turn 18 might be legal, it might not be the most ethical thing to do. If you spring this decision on them with little to no warning, you’ll create panic.

Especially if you haven’t encouraged them to be independent during those 18 years while you were raising them. And if they have no means to financially support themselves (for instance, if you didn’t let them get a job before and give them no support), you’re putting them in an awful situation.

Without a job or a place of their own, they might have to go to a shelter, crash on a friend’s couch, or even be homeless for a time. It’s not a good look for a parent to behave so coldly, just so that they can have more autonomy. It’s healthier to have a transition period where you give your child some time (a few months or more?) to create some stability in their life before they gradually move out.

And independence, as awesome as it is, isn’t something that develops overnight. You slowly help your child become more and more independent year after year.

There are lots of skills that you need to teach your child so that they can be a functioning adult and member of society.

Financial literacy, job applications, doing your taxes, cooking, cleaning, college applications, paying rent and utilities, driving, how to build healthy relationships with others, etc. The list is huge. And it requires the parent to be actively involved.

Naturally, your child should be proactive and willing to develop their independence as well. However, they take their cues from the authority figures in their lives, in large part, from their parents.

Young woman with long hair sitting on a couch, looking confused while packing a cardboard box in a living room setting

Image credits: SkelDry (not the actual photo)

Parents can’t kick their kids out until they are 18 years old. And even then, it’s best to support them as they seek greater independence

According to FindLaw, typically, it’s considered child abandonment if a parent kicks out their child who is younger than 18.

Until you come of age, your parents have to look after your physical health, safety, and welfare. This necessary care includes things like providing you with food, shelter, clothing, education, and medical care.

Not all parents want their kids to leave the nest, however. Some have an incredibly difficult time letting them go.

As ‘Parents Letting Go’ notes, if your young adult, who is over 18 years old, wants to leave, you, as a parent, “don’t have the power or right to block the doorway.” Furthermore, it’s always best to act with love, not out of anger, frustration, or resentment.

“It’s important to understand that a desire to establish a separate identity and seek independence is a normal inclination for late adolescents and young adults. We should align with and support our adult children’s desire to have their own identity and strive for emancipation,” ‘Parents Letting Go’ explains.

“Although the 18-year-old needs to take responsibility for how they will survive outside the home, parents can offer some support in finding housing, providing health and auto insurance coverage, and maybe some furniture for an apartment. These can be safety measures to avoid catastrophic medical bills or gestures of support such as furniture or groceries.”

What are your thoughts, dear Pandas? What advice would you give the 18-year-old now that they’ve been forced to leave? When did you first leave your parents’ home? What were the biggest challenges when it came to being fully independent? How do you enforce healthy boundaries at home with your family? Let us know in the comments.

Mother and child having a serious conversation on a couch, illustrating a moment of family conflict and emotional tension.

Image credits: EyeEm (not the actual photo)

Many internet users rushed to support the teenager and to offer them practical advice

Screenshot of a Reddit conversation about a mom throwing her child out on the street and legal obligations discussed.

Online forum discussion about mom throwing her child out on the street and legal rights involved in eviction process.

Screenshot of a social media comment about tagging relatives including mom, related to mom throws her child out on the street.

Comment discussing a mom throwing her child out on the street, highlighting legal and emotional struggles faced.

Commenter shares experience of being thrown out by mom for a random guy, expressing anger and advice on healing.

Text post discussing legal eviction notices and the law regarding a mom throwing her child out on the street.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a mom throwing her child out on the street for a random guy and legal views.

Screenshot of a social media comment criticizing a mom for throwing her child out for a random guy, discussing parental behavior.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing support resources related to a mother throwing her child out on the street.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing support for a child thrown out on the street by mom for a random guy.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment advising to call 211 for resources and seek immediate family or friend support.

Comment expressing heartbreak over mom throwing child out after 18, urging support and caution about new boyfriend influence.

Comment discussing the legal eviction process and concerns about a mom throwing her child out for a random guy.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a mother throwing her child out on the street and lacking respect and love.

Screenshot of an online comment revealing a mother cutting ties after throwing her child out for a random guy.

Alt text: Online discussion about mom throwing her child out on the street and legal responsibilities involved in the case

Text comment on a social media post expressing disbelief and a sarcastic remark about being a mom.

Reddit comment discussing a threat involving a phrase about letting someone talk sense into another person.

Screenshot of a text conversation discussing a mom throwing her child out on the street and legal responsibilities.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a mother throwing her child out on the street for a random guy controversy.

Comment about mom choosing a boyfriend over child, describing regret and relationship impact from age 12 to 22 years.

Comment from moonchildcountrygirl1 discussing job opportunities offering food and housing in resorts, camps, and cruises after college.

Comment discussing a mom throwing her child out for a random guy, highlighting selfishness and advice to stay strong.

Reddit comment discussing a mom throwing her child out for a random guy, highlighting feelings of sadness and betrayal.

Reddit comment about not staying where you're unwanted, related to mom throwing her child out on the street controversy.

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