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In-law relationships can be complicated, and sometimes downright frustrating. Unfortunately, Reddit user Traditional_Ad_8518 knows this all too well as her mother-in-law just fed her baby ice cream, something that she and her husband have repeatedly said no to.

Describing the conflict that followed on the subreddit r/JustNoMIL, the woman questions whether she’s overreacting, and her story highlights the challenges that come with navigating family dynamics and the importance of setting boundaries.

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    This woman wasn’t on good terms with her mother-in-law to begin with

    Image credits: Caitlin Regan (not the actual photo)

    But things got even worse when the lady fed her 2-month-old baby ice cream behind her back

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    Image credits: alinabuphoto (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Traditional_Ad_8518

    The baby clearly wasn’t ready for ice cream

    The grandma definitely should’ve waited a while longer with the ice cream. For the first 4 to 6 months, breast milk or formula is the only food a baby needs. After that, parents and caregivers can start solid foods when the baby shows signs of readiness; at first, the little one should keep it simple with just a few teaspoons of a one-ingredient food (like a pureed fruit, veggie, or meat) every day.

    Within a few months, the baby gets ready for a variety of foods and one to two meals a day. By 8 to 12 months old, they may grow into an enthusiastic eater who enjoys plenty of soft finger foods and wants three meals plus snacks every day.

    According to experts, people should only introduce one new food at a time to a baby. By doing this, they can pinpoint an allergic reaction if they have one. Since dairy allergies are common, this is especially important when offering ice cream to the baby.

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    The typical signs the little ones exhibit when they’re having an allergic reaction to ice cream are:

    • Vomiting;
    • Diarrhea;
    • Skin rash;
    • Swelling around the lips or eyes.

    So it sounds like the poor thing did have a negative response to grandma’s “treat.” Ice cream is often classified as a dairy product since it is high in calcium, which is good for building strong bones. However, ice cream is more of a dessert since it usually has a lot of added sugar.

    One serving of your average vanilla ice cream contains 21 grams of added sugar, which equates to about 1.5 tablespoons of sugar. While this may not seem like a lot to us, it is to a baby’s small stomach and young digestive system.

    Image credits: Sarah Chai (not the actual photo)

    Sadly, this situation is a reflection of a broader picture, and tensions between mothers and daughters-in-law are not that rare

    The historic formation of heterosexual family structures may be partly responsible for creating an environment of tension between in-laws, forming the basis of the trope of the meddling mother-in-law specifically.

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    As the senior woman of the household in these arrangements, the mother is in charge of the domestic sphere and gains decision-making authority over her daughter-in-law. “It’s a precarious environment because the new wife is separated from their family of origin and those who may be more protective of her,” Gretchen Perry, professor at the University of Canterbury, New Zealand, and co-author of the paper In-Law Relationships in Evolutionary Perspective: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, pointed out to the BBC. While people might have friction with their own families, she explained that “it’s more likely you’re going to agree and have common interests with them,” while there might be “less of an overlap in common agreement” with in-laws.

    Depending on the nature of that circumstance, it can be a difficult, controlling environment, with a lot of conflicts, so the omnipresent trope of the meddling mother-in-law is partly a hangover from this set-up, where a daughter-in-law is under the thumb of a matriarch.

    Image credits: RODNAE Productions (not the actual photo)

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    People criticized the mother-in-law for her actions

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    And some even shared similar experiences they went through