
“I Don’t Have Kids”: MIL Confesses Her Ulterior Motive After Calling CPS On DIL
The subreddit r/JUSTNOMIL is a place for people to vent about their mother-in-law’s nasty, cruel, and toxic actions.
A woman who goes on the platform by YoureKiddingRight99 thought she’d never end up there since the relationship she had with her husband’s mom was pretty good.
But everything changed after she agreed to babysit a friend’s child. What started as a simple favor quickly spiraled into a full-blown CPS investigation, complete with shocking accusations and an even more shocking motive behind them.
Some mother-in-law stories go way beyond family drama
Image credits: GSR-PhotoStudio/Envato (not the actual photo)
This woman says hers called CPS to stop her from “ending the bloodline”
Image credits: Wavebreakmedia/Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: LightFieldStudios/Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: YoureKiddingRight99
It’s important to note that such animosity between mother- and daughter-in-laws is by no means the norm
The book In-law Relationships: Mothers, Daughters, Fathers, and Sons included a survey and interview responses from more than 1,500 people and found that only about 15% of MILs and DILs had a really troubled time getting along. More than half felt good about their bond. Still, there were some differences in how they viewed each other:
- 33% of MILs strongly agreed the two were close, compared to 18% of DILs;
- 42% strongly agreed they admired their daughters-in-law, but only 23% of the younger women felt the same way about their husband’s mother;
- 37% strongly agreed they enjoyed spending time together, compared to 22% of DILs;
- 50% strongly agreed they trusted their daughters-in-law, but only 23% of the younger women felt the same way about their mothers-in-law.
Co-author of the book, Geoffrey Greif, Ph.D., who is a distinguished professor at the University of Maryland School of Social Work, said that he did observe interference in the marriage and child-rearing from the mother-in-law to be the main concern from the daughter-in-law’s perspective.
Image credits: sedrik2007/Envato (not the actual photo)
More than half of the daughters-in-law (52%) strongly disagreed or disagreed that they had the same parenting philosophy as their mothers-in-law.
According to the professor, the goal in these situations is to figure out a way to stay connected, and he recommended that DILs reframe the interference as love, concern, and a wish to be engaged.
However, it can be difficult to find common ground when your in-law is willing to go behind your back to sabotage your family plans.
Psychologist and author of Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties & How to Heal the Conflict Dr. Joshua Coleman believes grandparents (to be) need to understand that, ultimately, the decisions about how to raise their children belong to the parents.
“Remember that your child’s spouse is now the gatekeeper to any relationship you might have with your child or grandchildren. You might not like whom [your child] married, and they might not be that crazy about you. But failing to handle these dynamics with care only brings more conflict, distance, and pain. It limits the possibility of seeing your child and grandchildren again. And it makes a potentially resolvable situation impossible to resolve,” Coleman explained.
Actively acting against her son’s wife, the lady isn’t helping but damaging the bond she has with her remaining “bloodline.”
As her story went viral, the woman answered some of the most frequent questions people had for her
While the reactions ranged from disbelief to outrage
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
To the MIL her name is her social standing. Letting as many as you know that know her what she did will bring her world crashing down.
It's likely more insidious. The MIL is likely one of those women who have an healthy and codependent relationship with their son.
Load More Replies...I would report this because she is going to try and use this with adoption agencies to block an adoption. Then go NC but explain in a text/email exactly why so there is a "paper" trail that you might have to present at a future date. After that phone her and tell her to f**k off so there is no trace of that.
I don’t get this c**p about “bloodlines” and s**t still being a thing in the 21st century, ffs. Not everyone really cares if you and your child share DNA or not, and believe me, even the old folks didn’t care about it either, so don’t try to write it off as an age thing—-it’s actually just an a*****e thing. My paternal grandparents were Eastern European Catholic immigrants, who came to the US in 1910-1911. When my oldest brother married a woman who had a little girl back in the early 1970s, both of my old country grandparents instantly loved her and proudly introduced her to friends, neighbors, and other family members as their first (and at that time, only) great-grandchild! In other words, even though she didn’t share a drop of blood with our family, she was instantly accepted as one of us by all of us. Because we’re not a******s who are obsessed by “bloodlines”, as if we’re breeding show dogs instead of just making our own little families—-and “family” is a word with a wide open definition, btw. It can mean everything from adults and children who share DNA to adults who simply care about, look after, and are nodded and committed to each other as if they did share DNA. Sometimes biological families can be total shitheels, so the relatives they abuse turn away from them the second they’re able to get away, and turn towards the people they consider their chosen family. It is a truly beautiful thing to behold. The majority of the time they’re happier and more content and loved with their chosen families than they ever were with the people who made them and raised them. Everyone deserves that.
My 2 best friends are my family. I consider them to be my brother and sister.
Load More Replies...To the MIL her name is her social standing. Letting as many as you know that know her what she did will bring her world crashing down.
It's likely more insidious. The MIL is likely one of those women who have an healthy and codependent relationship with their son.
Load More Replies...I would report this because she is going to try and use this with adoption agencies to block an adoption. Then go NC but explain in a text/email exactly why so there is a "paper" trail that you might have to present at a future date. After that phone her and tell her to f**k off so there is no trace of that.
I don’t get this c**p about “bloodlines” and s**t still being a thing in the 21st century, ffs. Not everyone really cares if you and your child share DNA or not, and believe me, even the old folks didn’t care about it either, so don’t try to write it off as an age thing—-it’s actually just an a*****e thing. My paternal grandparents were Eastern European Catholic immigrants, who came to the US in 1910-1911. When my oldest brother married a woman who had a little girl back in the early 1970s, both of my old country grandparents instantly loved her and proudly introduced her to friends, neighbors, and other family members as their first (and at that time, only) great-grandchild! In other words, even though she didn’t share a drop of blood with our family, she was instantly accepted as one of us by all of us. Because we’re not a******s who are obsessed by “bloodlines”, as if we’re breeding show dogs instead of just making our own little families—-and “family” is a word with a wide open definition, btw. It can mean everything from adults and children who share DNA to adults who simply care about, look after, and are nodded and committed to each other as if they did share DNA. Sometimes biological families can be total shitheels, so the relatives they abuse turn away from them the second they’re able to get away, and turn towards the people they consider their chosen family. It is a truly beautiful thing to behold. The majority of the time they’re happier and more content and loved with their chosen families than they ever were with the people who made them and raised them. Everyone deserves that.
My 2 best friends are my family. I consider them to be my brother and sister.
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