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For every soul we create, there is a soul that we felt a connection with first.

The one who helped us create life.

The one who watches on helplessly while the woman he loves, moans and howls through labor stages.

While we have always put each other first, mother nature drifts in to place him in the backseat while he watches them transform into one other. All without needing his assistance.

At every single birth I have attended, the men are in the background, even if they are up close with their women.

They are actually stronger than they realize.

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5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's a game face, right there. He looks so intense, yet a million miles away.

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Carrying the irony in their faces of being able to fix everything yet somehow not able to "fix" our pain and discomfort.

It's not even the fact that we need to be saved but that they're essentially powerless to rescue in a way that they are used to being able to do.

Their empathy skyrockets in a manner that most of them have never experienced, yet they stay silent.

They do not make the situation about themselves.

Nor do they panic.

They are anxious.

Worried.

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5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is really beautiful. She looks like she's ready to collapse into him.

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Frustrated.

They do their best to not let on.

I make occasional eye contact with them to telepathically tell them that she is okay.

She will be okay.

Words are rarely spoken.

Whether through caressing us through our experience or respecting our space, they are in the shadows, observing.

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Witnessing two or more people being born.

They watch the women they once knew being birthed into who they are now.

It is illogical to think that the men we love & choose to be present do not experience a beautiful and gaining loss as well.

They watch the woman they love turn into a stranger who is somehow still the woman they love.

Paralyzed with the intensity before them, their empathy overrides their fear and they stay strong.

To these men, we see you and we love you.

Each one of us has had experiences so deeply personal that words could never adequately describe our affection for them. Early on in childhood, I recognized my sensitivity to the world. This allowed me to be perceptive in creative ways to those around me. Marveling in the details that come with documenting people's lives. I don't just take pictures. I feel them.

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Bringing your life to the forefront of a lens. Investing myself as much as I can to create the most intimate photos possible. Concentrating on unspoken cues and picking up hints from your worlds, while turning the images into pieces of art. Creating a genuine relationship with those who choose my services, beyond just the final product, is the most important aspect of this line of work.

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MBZ MetalsmithArtist
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5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This could be a dad waiting for a c section- they made my husband wait outside when I was being prepared for emergency csection (after 38 hours of natural labor that stopped progressing normally). He was ushered into the operating room a moment before our son was pulled out of the incision. ...The nurse said they did it that way as a policy after having one too many expectant fathers pass out at the sight of the incision on a pregnant belly, so close to baby. They said there had been times when the fathers ended up with more stitches than mom...(though theirs were in a more comfortable location...)

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Summer Mason
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1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember watching my husband's face with our boy. He had never seen a vaginal birth. All three of his kids were c section. He was so loving and encouraging and never left my side.

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What inspired me to make the series of dads has everything to do with empathy. Over the years, birth partners are in the shadows and feel powerless, but they don’t realize how powerful their attentiveness and empathy really are. It gives men a chance to see that their emotional availability can be crucial to the women they love. They are not incapable.

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Sinead Kenny
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I read reality is hitting him and he feels out of his depth.....

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Linda Lee
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The pressure he's applying to her hips, like he would do anything to help her. Warms my heart.

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Bored Toadette
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love that they show pictures before and after baby is born with this couple❤️

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Wibbi
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5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There's nothing... to partly exposed breast, no vagina, no newborn baby, or anything else this post is marking as so called "matrue content"! Everyone is fully clothed! How the hell is the decision for something to be "mature content" made??? I wouldn't mark anything I saw so far as "mature content"... this is life and not something that has to be hidden

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Aga Agnieszka
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1 year ago

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Tak tak, mój tak płakał że by się chłop odwodnił a teraz nawet nie zadzwoni do córki zero kontaktu od ponad 11 lat.

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Robyn Rob
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember my husband being very calm and he let me know he was monitoring the contractions on the screen and said the one coming up wasn’t as bad. He intentionally lied. It worked. It was very painful but It helped me stay sane. I looked in his eyes and saw trust and I cling to that. My daughter is a healthy and beautiful seventeen year old and I’d do it all over again!

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Nadine
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5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is clearly listening to music. It helps the body relax.

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Michelle C
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The toilet was my best friend when I was in labor....I remember crying when they told me that I had to get back into the bed to get checked.

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Wibbi
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5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same here... where the hell is this "mature content"??? Is it the IV? I don't get this...

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