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“Exactly Like They Raised Me”: Middle Kid Gets Overlooked Until Parents Want A Free Destination Wedding Trip
Growing up is realizing that nobody is perfect – even your parents. In fact, you might come to realize that your mother and father are not the kind of people that you want to have a relationship with at all.
That’s why one man decided that he wouldn’t be inviting his parents to his wedding. He grew up feeling overlooked and ignored, so he has no desire to keep in touch with his parents as an adult. But when they found out that he was engaged, they insisted on attending the wedding. Below, you’ll find the full story that the groom posted on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers shared.
Image credits: Chinh Le Duc (not the actual photo)
But as soon as they found out about his wedding, they insisted on coming
A bride and groom are not obligated to invite anyone to their wedding, even their own parents
“AITA for telling my parents that I am behaving exactly like they raised me to behave?” – this internet user took to one of Reddit’s most judgmental communities to tell its members a tale of how his parents, with whom he’s not on good terms, expected him to pay for their travel to his wedding. The post managed to garner nearly 8K upvotes as well as 383 comments discussing the situation.
Did you know that according to this 2023 report from The Chronicles Of Evidence-Based Mentoring, “Nearly 40% of US children lack strong emotional bonds with their parents”?
It’s no big secret that being a parent is anything but easy!
Lack of instruction, constant decision-making, financial strain, peer pressure and social comparison, lack of personal time, sleep deprivation, sibling rivalry, teenage rebellion, and good old parental guilt – it’s a true rollercoaster.
Plus, sometimes, you have to cut your old folks some slack as they’re also doing this whole thing for the very first time.
I mean, nobody is born an expert, eh?
However, as with everything in life – there’s a limit. And when you start to notice this toxic pattern, whether it’s them being overly controlling, neglectful, manipulative, or just simply abusive – you have to start putting your own interest first and do what’s best for you and you only.
Perhaps the best thing you can do in such a case is to establish boundaries and accept that there’s a possibility that your parents won’t change. Besides, if this bond constantly causes you distress, you might even have to consider going low contact to essentially take control over your life and – like the author of today’s tale – focus on creating your own support system that actually cares about your well-being!
Forcing your way into your child’s life is not the best way to repair your relationship
Image credits: Marc A. Sporys (not the actual photo)
Anywho, the OP, u/NoTarget8175, is a middle kid with a “golden child” older brother and a younger sister, “the baby.” He was mostly ignored and got into lots of trouble during his youth, for which he was never even punished due to his parents’ apathy.
His high school guidance counselor took an interest in him after she noticed the disinterest that came from his family and even helped him get a full-ride scholarship.
Fast forward to now, and the guy’s 30 years old and is about to tie the knot with his beloved fiancée!
He didn’t exactly cut his folks off – however, they’re not that close either. But when they found out about the wedding, he didn’t hesitate and said that they were welcome to come.
Due to the nature of his family, it’s not that surprising that they instantly assumed that he would cover their travel expenses and basically sponsor the trip to his wedding, yet the OP stated that they would have to get there on their own.
Naturally, an argument ensued, and they got mad and said that they’d raised him better – however, he clapped back and gave them a taste of that much-needed reality.
What do you think about this, Pandas? Do you agree with the author, or would you have done things differently?
Readers assured the groom that he had done nothing wrong, and he joined in on the conversation in the comments
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