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How Traveling Is Changing My Autistic Daughter
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How Traveling Is Changing My Autistic Daughter

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One thing is for sure: travel is the ultimate educator, guide, coach and friend you could ever have. The changes I have witnessed in my daughter are amazing, she is more sociable, confident and loves adventures. Thriving on change and new experiences.

I’m traveling to the forests of the world with my 8-year-old daughter Iris Grace. When she was diagnosed with severe autism at 2 years old, I couldn’t have imagined 6 years later we would be going on adventures like this one. It all started with following her interests and learning to live in the moment, watching and listening to understand how she experiences the world. Each trip is tailored to Iris’s interests and we educate her during the journey as well as building on her self-care and life skills. She learns in a real way that means something to her, that is flexible and free-flowing. I am documenting the journeys inspiring others, showing them the beauty in our world that needs to be protected for future generations.

We believe ‘Different is Brilliant’, raising positive awareness for autism. It’s about following the lead of your child and building on strengths instead of focusing on the weaknesses.

Iris’s love of nature is the foundation of her development, the inspiration for her paintings and where I have found she learns best. Our latest adventure was in April 2018, a 2-week road trip in Greece, visiting forests that are some of Europe’s oldest self-planted beech and oaks, ancient ruins, beautiful beaches, olive groves & historic cities.

Photography by Arabella Carter-Johnson and Harry Speller.

More info: irisgracepainting.com

Our 2 week Road Trip in Greece

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We were studying ancient Greece in Iris’ home education and I wanted to engage her more in the subject. As I researched Greece, I realised that there was so much to explore in the country beyond the typical tourist sites, masses of natural landscapes where she could be free and happy to explore. It’s a safe country to travel in and they are very kind and welcoming to children.

Iris walking confidently through markets in Athens

Although, like many children with autism, Iris needed stillness and routine, there was an undeniable traveler’s spirit emerging in her. She was filled with a curiosity that was no longer satisfied by her paintings, or the books that used to be her fortress in the confusion of autism. My old home-schooling system of pre-set topics and themes seemed not to be as powerful as it had been: Iris seemed to learn better on the spot and in the moment. She was changing, and my methods needed to transform along with her.

We visited the incredible Meteora monasteries rising like ecclesiastical eagles’ nests

In many ways, this realisation that Iris could cope with more than we had understood felt liberating. Would it be possible to expand the horizons as far as foreign adventures? But it was also daunting. How far could we take a child whose challenges are clear to see in everyday life? Although Iris was now able to speak and read, her limited ability to converse and socialise were obstacles that couldn’t be ignored. Her behaviour when things went awry was becoming more difficult to manage as she grew taller and stronger. What would happen if she became unable to cope so far from home and her familiar comforts? Might it be possible to take Thula, her cat, on trips, and if not, how would Iris cope without her? How would their relationship change? How far should I try to push past what seemed possible: would the potential benefits outweigh the difficulties?

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These monasteries are among the most awe-inspiring religious sites on earth

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Autism is a way of being, functioning, and seeing the world. It isn’t something to be fixed or cured but we can help people on the spectrum find it easier to negotiate a world that has become very difficult for them. With support and understanding, anything is possible and there can be a bright future. Remembering that we all function differently and perceive life in our own way, so how can there be a one size fits all approach? We need to understand each person as an individual, not just a diagnosis. It’s incredibly complex as it’s constantly changing and developing as life goes on from moment to moment.

Spent time playing by the turquoise waters in the lush forest valleys

Happily playing and interacting with friends

We saw her open up and enjoy herself in the center of the community

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Trying different activities and meeting new people

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Playing with musicians, chatting with the locals built on Iris’s confidence

And we watched in delight as she overcame fears

Discovering the epic tales of heroes

Enjoying the view

At times it would all get too much, so I gave her time

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Even great little explorers need to be held

And for someone to listen to her worries

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Nature has its way of calming and releasing her troubles

She enjoys the peace and tranquility

The freedom of the sandy beaches

Colourful wild flowers

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And mind blowing tiny creatures

Delicate details

Curious machinery at the Olive Farm

Ancient trees

And bells

Inspiring scenery

The spectacular Vikos Gorge with its magical turquoise waters was another memorable sight and a place for exploration for Iris

Image credits: www.eyeem.com

Then dreaming of more adventures

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hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This post is very sweet. I cringe at the casual internet judgement in might attract, but thank you for sharing.

earringnut_1 avatar
earringnut
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i don't usually like these "travelling with my kid" posts but this is really cool. she's old enough that she will remember this. also you really seem to be doing it for her as apposed to trying to get cool parent points.

Load More Replies...
kahnawanna avatar
Kahna Wanna
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Iris has come a long way since her first paintings were posted on BoredPanda. Keep sharing!!

jitka-zachova avatar
Pamela24
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've been following you for years now and it's so wonderful to read how much you put in Iris and how much she gives you back. I admire you greatly. Now I need to go check your facebook page because I miss seeing Thula. ;)

winaalkerchief avatar
Wina Alkerchief
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh my God.. She is is so beautiful... Thank you for sharing this. And i hope for the best for Iris and your family. 😊😊😊

73988 avatar
Literal Pigeon
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As an autistic person, I'm sorry, but this makes me uncomfortable. First, there's no such thing as "severe autism", just autism that presents in ways that are noticeable to neurotypicals more. Second, did you get her consent before posting these pictures? And talking about her mental health struggles? Another thing I question is why you even had to disclose that she's autistic. You could've made this post just about you traveling with your daughter, you didn't have to bring her medical history into this. I don't doubt that you love your daughter and want what's best for her, but these kinds of posts give me a bad taste in my mouth. Too often are autistic people like myself used as clickbait for "inspirational" stories to be consumed by a neurotypical/non-autistic audience.

parmeisan avatar
Parmeisan
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It seemed to me like more of a way of educating neurotypicals about autism, by way of showcasing a less stereotypical example of it. We certainly need more of that. And from what I've seen, "severe autism" seems to be used even by many autists themselves, to indicate that they have severe issues relating to neurotypicals and therefore getting along in a world mostly composed of NTs. I hope this doesn't feel like an attack; I am not trying to devalue your perspective, just offering mine.

Load More Replies...
scarlet-patience avatar
Charles Chamiux
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wtf-why so many down votes? I was uplifted by this story! So many of us parents of non spécial needs children don't have or know this kind of relationship with our child(ren) and /or don't take the time to create this kind of bond. And often, it's our kids who won't appreciate this kind of attention or bonding. Just so many 💕💕💕💕 to you, Arabella, and Iris. I wish my kids were more receptive.

deborahfclarke_1 avatar
Deborah Clarke
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It will be interesting to see what she paints after her travels.

abrehio avatar
Athena Brehio
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is awesome! Thank u so much for sharing ur beautiful trip with Iris 💗

irisdietz avatar
Potatohead
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

glad to share my name with such a beautiful and strong girl <3

lornacherry_1 avatar
Lorna Cherry
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I read your book and I love iris graces paintings does she still have thula and are they still adventuring and discovering new things together?

jessicapreuss avatar
Jessica Preuss
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's great for her... not every kiddo on the spectrum has the ability to handle that level change from their routine...

martinusher_1 avatar
Martin Usher
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Absolutely wonderful. It gladdens the heart to read this post. More power to you both.

thymianne avatar
White Wolf
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is also a wonderful painter and has a maine c**n cat, named Thula.

fjord_ avatar
Iris
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a beautiful daughter you got there! And what an amazing pictures. That must be a great experience to see her grow during your travels together :)

kibivec946 avatar
I disagree
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Quote Autism is a way of being, functioning, and seeing the world. It isn’t something to be fixed or cured but we can help people on the spectrum find it easier to negotiate a world that has become very difficult for them.  Unquote I’m autistic and I disagree. There have been numerous developments in treating autism despite what media tells you.

tatjana_peskir avatar
Tatjana Peskir
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I too have a lovely daughter with autism, a keen traveller. However, I strongly disagree with the statement that autism is not something to be cured. First of all, it is (as science tells us) and second of all, why shouldn’t it be? I see dozens and dozens of kids regain function in trials at universities, and using medical solutions for the underlying problems in autism. Autism is not a personality. Otherwise all asd people would be the same. Its a neuroinflammatory disorder, as last confirmed by a study at Harvard, analyzing asd brains postmortem. And the leading experts already have so many solutions at hand. Btw huge fan of her paintings since forever. Considering getting one.

73988 avatar
Literal Pigeon
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As an autistic whose patience is wearing thin: go eff yourself. (Kinnery Chaparrel, thank you!)

Load More Replies...
h8fake avatar
Elena Filatova
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I think a lot of autistic children would enjoy and grow in a beautiful, quiet, natural setting, but not everyone can afford to travel outside of the US, with only one of their children or have someone take pictures for them of all their beautiful experiences. This is a planned piece and I find it disappointing.

alcj13 avatar
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can understand if you live in the US to not feel the need to travel elsewhere, your country is incredible with the most varied landscape probably on earth along with the fact that you have over 50 national parks you guys are blessed with an amazing amount on your doorstep, there will be ways like house sitting where you can access free accommodation. Im not suggesting every family should go travelling abroad with their kids but it may suit some and this article might inspire them when they are feeling nervous due to their special situation. The reason why there are beautiful photos is that I’m a professional photographer & author, the friend who I went to Greece with is also a photographer too. Yes this trip was highly planned due to us travelling with a child on the spectrum, it’s a big enough challenge for us all without having to worry about what the plan is. I document all of our adventures, the good, bad, triumphs and developments.

Load More Replies...
hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This post is very sweet. I cringe at the casual internet judgement in might attract, but thank you for sharing.

earringnut_1 avatar
earringnut
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i don't usually like these "travelling with my kid" posts but this is really cool. she's old enough that she will remember this. also you really seem to be doing it for her as apposed to trying to get cool parent points.

Load More Replies...
kahnawanna avatar
Kahna Wanna
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Iris has come a long way since her first paintings were posted on BoredPanda. Keep sharing!!

jitka-zachova avatar
Pamela24
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've been following you for years now and it's so wonderful to read how much you put in Iris and how much she gives you back. I admire you greatly. Now I need to go check your facebook page because I miss seeing Thula. ;)

winaalkerchief avatar
Wina Alkerchief
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh my God.. She is is so beautiful... Thank you for sharing this. And i hope for the best for Iris and your family. 😊😊😊

73988 avatar
Literal Pigeon
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As an autistic person, I'm sorry, but this makes me uncomfortable. First, there's no such thing as "severe autism", just autism that presents in ways that are noticeable to neurotypicals more. Second, did you get her consent before posting these pictures? And talking about her mental health struggles? Another thing I question is why you even had to disclose that she's autistic. You could've made this post just about you traveling with your daughter, you didn't have to bring her medical history into this. I don't doubt that you love your daughter and want what's best for her, but these kinds of posts give me a bad taste in my mouth. Too often are autistic people like myself used as clickbait for "inspirational" stories to be consumed by a neurotypical/non-autistic audience.

parmeisan avatar
Parmeisan
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It seemed to me like more of a way of educating neurotypicals about autism, by way of showcasing a less stereotypical example of it. We certainly need more of that. And from what I've seen, "severe autism" seems to be used even by many autists themselves, to indicate that they have severe issues relating to neurotypicals and therefore getting along in a world mostly composed of NTs. I hope this doesn't feel like an attack; I am not trying to devalue your perspective, just offering mine.

Load More Replies...
scarlet-patience avatar
Charles Chamiux
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wtf-why so many down votes? I was uplifted by this story! So many of us parents of non spécial needs children don't have or know this kind of relationship with our child(ren) and /or don't take the time to create this kind of bond. And often, it's our kids who won't appreciate this kind of attention or bonding. Just so many 💕💕💕💕 to you, Arabella, and Iris. I wish my kids were more receptive.

deborahfclarke_1 avatar
Deborah Clarke
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It will be interesting to see what she paints after her travels.

abrehio avatar
Athena Brehio
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is awesome! Thank u so much for sharing ur beautiful trip with Iris 💗

irisdietz avatar
Potatohead
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

glad to share my name with such a beautiful and strong girl <3

lornacherry_1 avatar
Lorna Cherry
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I read your book and I love iris graces paintings does she still have thula and are they still adventuring and discovering new things together?

jessicapreuss avatar
Jessica Preuss
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's great for her... not every kiddo on the spectrum has the ability to handle that level change from their routine...

martinusher_1 avatar
Martin Usher
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Absolutely wonderful. It gladdens the heart to read this post. More power to you both.

thymianne avatar
White Wolf
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is also a wonderful painter and has a maine c**n cat, named Thula.

fjord_ avatar
Iris
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a beautiful daughter you got there! And what an amazing pictures. That must be a great experience to see her grow during your travels together :)

kibivec946 avatar
I disagree
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Quote Autism is a way of being, functioning, and seeing the world. It isn’t something to be fixed or cured but we can help people on the spectrum find it easier to negotiate a world that has become very difficult for them.  Unquote I’m autistic and I disagree. There have been numerous developments in treating autism despite what media tells you.

tatjana_peskir avatar
Tatjana Peskir
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I too have a lovely daughter with autism, a keen traveller. However, I strongly disagree with the statement that autism is not something to be cured. First of all, it is (as science tells us) and second of all, why shouldn’t it be? I see dozens and dozens of kids regain function in trials at universities, and using medical solutions for the underlying problems in autism. Autism is not a personality. Otherwise all asd people would be the same. Its a neuroinflammatory disorder, as last confirmed by a study at Harvard, analyzing asd brains postmortem. And the leading experts already have so many solutions at hand. Btw huge fan of her paintings since forever. Considering getting one.

73988 avatar
Literal Pigeon
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As an autistic whose patience is wearing thin: go eff yourself. (Kinnery Chaparrel, thank you!)

Load More Replies...
h8fake avatar
Elena Filatova
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I think a lot of autistic children would enjoy and grow in a beautiful, quiet, natural setting, but not everyone can afford to travel outside of the US, with only one of their children or have someone take pictures for them of all their beautiful experiences. This is a planned piece and I find it disappointing.

alcj13 avatar
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can understand if you live in the US to not feel the need to travel elsewhere, your country is incredible with the most varied landscape probably on earth along with the fact that you have over 50 national parks you guys are blessed with an amazing amount on your doorstep, there will be ways like house sitting where you can access free accommodation. Im not suggesting every family should go travelling abroad with their kids but it may suit some and this article might inspire them when they are feeling nervous due to their special situation. The reason why there are beautiful photos is that I’m a professional photographer & author, the friend who I went to Greece with is also a photographer too. Yes this trip was highly planned due to us travelling with a child on the spectrum, it’s a big enough challenge for us all without having to worry about what the plan is. I document all of our adventures, the good, bad, triumphs and developments.

Load More Replies...
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