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Hey Pandas, What Was The Moment You Knew Your Life Was Ruined?
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The day my councillor told my parents about my suicidal tendencies. Because of that my teachers know and now my parents shout at me everyday about how I’m weak, being stupid and that the problem lies with me and that I shouldn’t run away from my problems and how if I did commit suicide, my entire family woul go to jail. I know all of this is true yet the fact that they say it directly to my face is so apalling. I’ve lost interest in my studies which will affect my future negatively if nothing is done soon. My mental health has gotten so bad that feeling any kind of emotions triggers headaches and nausea. This is most likely the begining of the end for me if I don’t do anything soon
First, I'm sorry you're going through this. Second, your whole family won't go to jail. They don't sound supportive at all. I don't know what exactly what's going on in your life, but you sound young. It might seem like it, but your entire life isn't ruined. It may feel like it, but there's a way out of this. Please try to find some counseling. If your family isn't interested in getting it for you, see about finding free counselors near you, or online. Honestly, I think once you are able to leave your house (I'm assuming you live at home), you'll be better off. It'll be hard. But I think eventually you'll be able to find people who support you. So please, don't give up. We're all stronger than we think we are.
When I told my Dad I was planning to buy a house. I had saved and built credit for several years and finally got everything lined up to buy. I made the mistake of telling my Dad, thinking he would be happy for me. Instead, he gave me a long speech about how he expected me to take care of him the rest of his life, complete with all of the horrible things that might happen to him if I left. (He is in no way disabled). Complete one-sided manipulative guilt trip. Crashed my world realizing he could rip apart my dreams with a smile on his face.
I realized that even if I left, he would try to follow me. The stress damaged my heart and I ended up having to give up my job because I physically couldn't keep up.
Really opened my eyes to how abusive and controlling he really is. I've been trying to find another job, but he's been doing what he can to sabotage me. The last argument we had, be brought out a loaded shotgun and threatened to end himself or my pets if I weren't nicer to him.
At the moment, he's happy as can be that I'm stuck here. I hope I can get out and feel so foolish for not running when I had the chance.
House gone, health gone, career gone, and the fantasy of my Dad being a decent person gone.
