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Hey Pandas, What Is A “Useful” Survival Tip That Will Wind Up Useless In The Long Run? (Closed)
Survival tips are everywhere. Ranging from taking your clothes off in the Arctic to avoid a mad polar bear to checking if your water smells like cinnamon, some are useful, others not so much. Give forth your own seemingly reasonable one that actually makes no sense and we'll see who is truly the queen or king of useless tips that will never actually be used.
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#1
Hippos will not attack anything bigger than themselves.
Final score:
32points
YHZ 3 years ago
Yes. That's why the tip will probably wind up as useless. Like all the posts on this list. About tips that will end up as useless.
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Joel Strauss 3 years ago
Also, is it true that hippo attacks are responsible for more human deaths than any other animal?
BreGerEu 3 years ago
As far as I know the most deadly animal towards human are midgets, because of infections, especially malaria.
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#2
If you get lost, you can just follow the North Star. If you get lost during the daytime, you may have to wait: First for nighttime to come, and secondly for all of humanity to die out so the light pollution will be gone and you can find the North Star.
Final score:
28points
Concept-Peter Roosdorp 3 years ago
You can get a simple bearing during the daytime with a stick. Put stick in ground. Mark where the sun is. Wait. Mark again. You now know approximate east and west.
Epiphonia 3 years ago
If you live near large landmarks (e.g. mountains) you can find your way by remembering “the mountains are in the eastward direction” or whatever happens to be near you. If you’re somewhere without large landmarks, good luck with approximate stick shadows.
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Madeleine Flowers 3 years ago
If you face the direction the sun is rising, and turn left, that's north. If you turn right, that's south. If you turn 180 degrees around, that's west. If you stay facing the sun, that's east. If you find a river when you're lost, follow it downstream, there's likely a settlement. If it's a clear night, Orion's belt should start off in the east and set in the west. If you can see all of Orion, Betelgeuse is going to be right above where east is in the early night (only applicable for the northern hemisphere) Hope this helps!
Jef Bateman 3 years ago
It's best to avoid the southern hemisphere. If the gravity of the earth ever goes down, you will just fall right off. (I hate that I have to explain that I'm joking, but I've been flamed enough by people who can't recognize jokes that I have to.)
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#3
My father insisted I take Judo-classes when I was 17 in order to defend my-self should I be attacked in the street....so far so good..you walk more confidently down a dark street....when it did happen,it was my shoe with the stiletto heel that did the trick...
Final score:
22points
Susanne B 3 years ago
But you might not have used it the way you did, if you had not had those classes
Jef Bateman 3 years ago
It's going to be hard for a small person to defend against a large person who has the benefit of planning and surprise. There are some things that can be taught that will help you out, but some people get a false sense of security from their martial arts classes and don't take adequate precautions to avoid dangerous situations. I still think martial arts can improve your life.
CATMONSTER2018 3 years ago
The main problem with some types of martial arts classes (Atleast in my area) is that they only teach you the stuff for excersice... Like I took Kung Fu for like 8 years or so, but I only know how to use the weapons like staff/sword.. - - -Its like "If I get jumped, how is this going to help me. "
#4
The instructions that flight attendants give regarding water landings really aren't relevant if you're going to crash from altitude into the open ocean. The plane is gonna break apart when it hits the water. Thank goodness it's rare! I was a flight attendant for a legacy airline. There have been cases where a plane made an emergency landing after takeoff or on approach, and in those cases, the emergency instructions are very important, as is obeying the flight attendants' instructions. A lot of jokes are made about the safety instructions that the flight attendants give before takeoff, but they're really important. Even if you fly every week, it's a good idea to pay attention to them before every flight. The passengers on Tully's flight (he landed it on the Hudson River, and everyone survived) will surely attest to that! If you know something really well, that kicks in instead of panic in crises.
Final score:
21points
Joel Strauss (Submission author) 3 years ago
I did. Thanks for the correction.
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Kevin Felton 3 years ago
Back in the nineties terrorists forced a plane to crash off the coast of Madagascar. The only people who died were the ones that drowned before they could be rescued by nearby fishermen. It's a myth that everyone dies in a crash.
Johnny 3 years ago
You say that the instructions aren't relevant because the plane is going to break up, then you give an example of a water landing where the plane stayed intact and the instructions were very relevant since if they weren't so close to rescuers, they'd have had to abandon the plane and use the life rafts and seat cushions as flotation devices, just as the flight attendants tell you.
Jette Wang Wahnon 3 years ago
Absolutely !! problem is not all passengers stay calm I also know certain things that are a bit scary and that is not known by passengers as such...
#5
always know where your towel is.
Final score:
20points
#7
aim for you attackers eyes. they cant stab you if their blind. and it hurts-a lot.
Final score:
13points
Jef Bateman 3 years ago
Yep. This is a self-defense strategy that has actually been shown to work. Also - groin kick.
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#8
It is impossible to drown if you are breathing.
Final score:
12points
Mommitude Attitude 3 years ago
Or lung cancer can also sometimes cause fluid buildup and basically you can't get enough oxygen in because there's not enough room and you end up drowning
Richard A Petro 3 years ago
It's also impossible to drown if one never goes into the water. Has anyone drowned from drinking water?
Minimo 3 years ago
If your kidneys stop working and you don't get dialysis you are royally screwed.
Load More Replies... #9
My father taught me how to fish, build a temporary shelter and forage so if I ever got lost in the woods, I could survive until rescued. He also taught me the most important things to put in your backpack including matches in a waterproof container and a set of fresh undergarments in a plastic bag in case I got wet. He also taught me that when waiting to be rescued, build a small fire and periodically put wet leaves on it...the smoke will make it easier for helicopters to pinpoint your location.
Final score:
9points
Carol Emory (Submission author) 3 years ago
The reason for building a small fire is to have more control over it. You just need enough to keep you warm, keep the big critters at bay and alert people looking for you where you are.
Luis Gomez 3 years ago
So he didn't happen to mention finding a water supply? Sure he taught you to fish, but you gotta know how to find the water source first
#10
Drinking alcohol because you're cold. F*ck it, I'm drunk now. What do I know. Oh, that and eating stuff. Actually, that's important.
Final score:
8points
Richard A Petro 3 years ago
Remember, drinking alcohol won't solve your problems but neither will drinking milk.
Steve Barnett (Submission author) 3 years ago
Sorry, tried to be humorous. Not my best. I'll work on it. Bear with me.
#11
A wolf pack won't eat you if they arent hungry enough
Final score:
8points
GSMountainWolf 3 years ago
Wolves will only attack you if they are threatened, rabid, hurt, if you get to close to them or their pups, or if they are starving to death. To survive an encounter, make yourself defensive and NEVER EVER run or turn away from them. Despite many people’s beliefs, they rarely ever harm humans, in fact a dog has a greater chance and is more likely to kill a person than a wolf is. Also, bonus fact, they make a positive, huge impact on the forest and we need to save them
Spikey boi (Submission author) 3 years ago (edited)
Yep that's why it's a useless survival tip, it isn't even all that accurate! But jokes aside I didn't actually know they attacked humans that rarely, I've known stories of some being friendly but I had no clue they attacked that rarley, thanks for correcting me!
Load More Replies... #12
Pull your school desk out in the hall and crouch under it if atomic bombs start to fall. That is what they told us in the 50's and 60's.We were fortunate that we did not have to test its effectiveness but it was pretty clear that it was sort of futile. Especially if you lived in the DC area.
Final score:
7points
#13
You can't really die from hypothermia if outside temperature is over 86°F (30°C)
Final score:
5points
IAMMATEO (Submission author) 3 years ago
I thought that right after I posted it hahaha
Load More Replies... #14
The million-item "go bags"/ "bug-out bags". KISS, folks. KISS. Please.
Final score:
5points
#15
Packing certain items for outdoor trips. I've learned that there's no set amount of things that one needs to take all the time, it always greatly depends on the trip you're planning. Learning about necessary kits is very useful at the beginning (and most of the time), but once you learn it, you don't follow it to the letter. Just don't forget the socks.
Final score:
4points
#16
Don't use a blow-up boat.
Final score:
4points
#17
Licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets.
Final score:
4points
Richard A Petro 3 years ago
Which planets? I understand that "doorknob licking" is VERY popular on Jupiter...read it on the Internet so's it must be true!
Spikey boi 3 years ago
Saturn and neptune have outlawed it because it can be addicting
Load More Replies... #18
Don't steal food from animals.
Final score:
3points
#19
Umm... Most of the survival things I know are useful. But, if you are attacked by a bear hold a lit cigarette to those to distract them. If you can do it without getting your arm ripped off that is.
Final score:
2points
#20
When drowning, Fill your lungs with air. It will help you float.
Final score:
2points
#21
If you are ever being chased by a polar bear, take off all your clothes. They are very curious animals, and will stop to sniff them. IDK if this will help anyone, but useless(?) life tip.
Final score:
2points
Theoretical Empiricist 3 years ago
Ah...and here we come to the "useless" part...
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#22
If you think you’re being followed, make random turns a to verify they’re actually following you. If so, pull into the nearest police station. Of course, that doesn’t help you if it’s the police chasing you.
Final score:
2points
#23
Don't die.
Final score:
2points
#24
If you see a bear, don't move. Depends on which bear and a bunch of other factors. Also, to start a fire, rub 2 rocks together. Doesn't work with any 2 rocks and you could be wasting valuable time
Final score:
1point
Ariel Ivri (Submission author) 3 years ago
Lol yeah a name from when I didn't know this website
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Luis Gomez 3 years ago
rub two rocks together? Like sensually? Or rough massage? I'll just use my lighter or magnesium stick
#26
Eat till you're sleepy, sleep till you're hungry. Repeat.
Final score:
0points
#27
If you are attacked by an animal go for its throat! Choke it to death! IT BIT MY HANDS OFF!
Final score:
0points
Susanne B 3 years ago
If the animal is small enough, for you to get your hands all around ist's throat i.e. not a hippo or elephant or rhino or lion or tiger or bear
#28
If u are in India don’t visit any popular temple… it’s full of scam and fake priest… rather then visit places and explore cities in daytime
Final score:
0points
#29
If you are in India… don’t visit popular temples. It’s full of scam and fake goon priests.
Final score:
-1point
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