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This is a bit of a complicated situation, so I'll do my best to give context. My friend group (15 yrs old) has basically all dated each other at some point. I am also my friend's ex. I have know my friend (also 15) since kindergarten and we always communicate our feelings with each other. Their ex is our mutual friend who broke up with them due to their phone addiction and never really communicating anything. This was a year ago. My friend already was going to the homecoming dance with someone else. I told them that their ex had asked me, and they seemed excited and supportive. But when the day of the dance came, I was informed by another mutual friend of ours that they were avoiding me. According to this friend, they thought it had been platonic and were upset with me (obe of their exes) for going with that person (also their ex). I noticed this for real when they passed by the friend group and waved at everyone except me. I had a great night but I couldn't stop thinking about how I might have been in the wrong. Was I TA?
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#1
You are just learning that in areas of relationships, what people say and what they actually want can often be two different things. “I told them that their ex had asked me, and they seemed excited and supportive.” Yes, because they care for you. But because you care for them, you need to be absolutely sure they feel this way before you accept. Have private conversations after they have time to absorb the information. So maybe you were TA, but just see it as a learning experience and apologize.
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