Guy Demands To Switch Homes With Brother Just Because He Has A Big Family

You can keep to yourself all you want, but that doesn’t mean you’ll avoid drama. Many of us out there have truly entitled, demanding, and annoying families. They will get in touch, and they will ask for things without stopping, gaslight, bother, and pressure you into conceding to their requests, and sometimes make you feel bad for simply existing.

A man turned to Reddit for advice after a campaign of manipulation and harassment from his brother’s side, who wanted them to swap houses. Since the brother had more children, he had talked himself into believing he really was entitled to the guy’s home. This led to a long series of attempts to get him to move out.

Some people feel entitled to what you own simply because you are related

Frustrated couple sitting on sofa overwhelmed by their big family with two children playing loudly behind them.

Image credits: Prostock-studio (not the actual image)

This man, for example, was constantly harassed by his brother, who decided they should trade homes

Text post about a guy demanding to switch homes with brother due to brother’s big family size.

Man pressured by family to switch homes with brother due to big family, causing unexpected conflicts and dilemmas.

Text excerpt explaining a brother's family struggling financially and renting a cramped apartment for their growing family.

Man considers switching homes with brother to accommodate big family needs during a family gathering discussion.

Text describing concerns about switching homes with brother due to big family, with sister-in-law pushing for the trade.

Text excerpt about manipulation tactics where a brother demands to switch homes due to his big family’s cramped living conditions.

Text excerpt describing invasive behavior as part of a guy demands to switch homes with brother due to big family conflict.

Woman expressing frustration while talking to man in a blue suit about switching homes with brother due to big family.

Image credits: rthanuthattaphong (not the actual image)

Text excerpt about boundary violations involving a brother demanding to switch homes due to his big family.

Guy demands to switch homes with brother due to having a big family amid a heated family discussion.

Alt text: Man expresses frustration over brother demanding to switch homes due to his big family, highlighting limits in family support.

Text discussing a guy demanding to switch homes with his brother due to the brother having a big family.

Young man with curly hair looking stressed, holding his head, illustrating conflict about switching homes with brother due to family size

Image credits: Timur Weber (not the actual image)

Text excerpt from a Reddit post where a guy debates refusing to switch homes with his brother who has a big family.

Image credits: Nervous_Ad5411

Entitlement usually affects individual people, not entire families

Entitlement is sadly common enough that most people have encountered a truly delusional person at least once, but it’s rare to see it in an entire family unit. Because the brother’s demand is truly unhinged, as OP is in no way, shape, or form required to just let a whole family take over his hard-earned house because it’s more comfortable for them.

A possible explanation for this behavior is that “Karen” and the brother feed each other’s delusions, leading to this sort of behavior. While it’s not perfectly understood, there appears to be some connection between narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), Bipolar disorder, and a general attitude of entitlement.

One research paper by Dr. John Gunderson and Dr. Elsa Ronningstam states that “Characteristics shared by the two disorders and thus failing to discriminate between NPD and bipolar disorder are notable. A sense of entitlement occurred in both diagnostic groups in Morey’s and our studies; that is, both narcissists and borderlines felt that others should recognize their needs and give them special favors.”

In other words, OP’s brother and his partner are a match made in heaven (for each other) as they seem capable of staying together while maintaining these delusional beliefs. Unfortunately, OP, no doubt their children and random passersby have already or will suffer from them being downright horrible, mean, and entitled.

Man stressed on couch while woman listens attentively during a serious conversation about switching homes with brother.

Image credits: Alex Green (not the actual image)

The guy who shared the story should resist giving in to the manipulation

There are some forms of entitlement that are not entirely detrimental. “Earned” entitlement, coming from care, good behavior, and hard work is psychologically beneficial and a solid way to stop someone from taking advantage of you. In a sense, OP’s feeling that his house should be used how he wishes is a form of earned entitlement.

This is by no means a bad thing, he did earn it and should defend doing what he wants. Very often adult children are taken advantage of by predatory parents who use guilt and their own, often less earned, feelings of entitlement to manipulate them. Only by understanding your own rights and worth can a person resist the manipulation and the guilt-tripping that entitled folks often employ.

Fortunately, the tone of OP’s post suggests that he does know he is in the right and he now has the backing of hundreds, if not thousands of comments all suggesting that his brother and his family can go shove it. Because they really should. There is nothing wrong with asking a family member for some help, but you should meet them a lot further than halfway, instead of subjecting them to a campaign of psychological bombardment.

Two brothers indoors having a tense conversation as one demands to switch homes due to his big family situation.

Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual image)

Readers were shocked by the family’s behavior

Screenshot of an online comment thread showing a user replying No you are not in a casual discussion.

Reddit comment criticizing a guy demanding to switch homes with his brother because he has a big family.

Man discusses family dynamics and financial independence, debating home swapping with brother due to his big family size.

Comment criticizing a guy demanding to switch homes with brother due to big family size, calling it unreasonable.

Comment discussing a guy demanding to switch homes with his brother due to his big family size, calling it a*****e behavior.

Reddit comment discussing a guy demanding to switch homes with his brother due to having a big family.

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