The dreaded ex. Most of us have got them. There are millions of occasions when the situation is resolved with an amicable, mature ceasefire that can even blossom into a beautiful friendship. Sadly, there are just as many occasions when the asshole can frankly just drop dead for all you care, together with his savage text fails.

In these times of instant messaging and easy contact at the touch of your fingertips, it can be just too tempting for the eschewed ex to reach out and test the waters. An uncalculated text from your ex can end up causing an explosion of emotions with WW III proportions. Bored Panda had compiled a list of times when people came up with the perfect response to these unwanted advances, some of them are just deliciously devilish and undoubtedly funny texts.

Scroll down to check out the list of ex-texts and funny messages, and may the force be with you while dealing with your senseless ex.

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

Hard Pass

Text conversation showing a brutal response to an ex, including a vivid analogy with historical figures.

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    #2

    Slowly Suffocating

    Brutal response to ex text: "I was simply suffocating from your b******t."

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    #3

    Savage Burn

    Brutal response to an ex text saying, "I miss you," detailing a year's worth of emotional closure and moving on.

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    #4

    Sleeping Like A Baby

    Brutal response to an ex's text with a baby sleeping peacefully meme.

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    #5

    Savage Burn

    Text exchange with waving, OK, pointing hand emojis, and an egplant with a golfer emoji below.

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    #6

    Wait, There Were Feelings?

    Brutal response to ex text exchange, with a humorous correction at the end.

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    #7

    Dealing With Your Ex

    A brutal response to an ex's text: "I called" and "I watched it ring" shown in chat bubbles.

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    #8

    Lesson Learned

    Brutal response to ex text exchange: "You'll never find someone like me." Reply: "That's the point."

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    #9

    Text Form Ex

    Text message exchange with a brutal response to an ex saying, "Hey long time no talk" answered with "let's keep it that way."

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    #10

    Moving On

    Brutal response in a text conversation about forgetting an ex.

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    #11

    It Reminds Me Of You

    Brutal response to text: “I just ordered a pizza and it came in 20 seconds. Thought of you!”

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    #12

    A Real Nightmare

    Funny text exchange showing a brutal response to an ex about a dream and getting back together.

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    #13

    Just Nope

    Baby in blue showing a rude gesture in reply to a text, illustrating brutal responses.

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    #14

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to ex text about moving to LA and becoming famous.

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    #15

    Growing Up

    Text message exchange showing a brutal response to an ex’s request to meet at Blockbuster.

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    #16

    You Just Have To Visit It

    Text message exchange showing a brutal response to an ex's question about Nashville.

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    #17

    As Far Away As The Sun

    Text exchange showing a humorous response to an ex, comparing them to the sun with a required distance of 92,935,700 miles.

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    #18

    Fact Check

    Text conversation showing a brutal response to an ex's reference to eye color.

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    #19

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to ex: emoji conversation with witty reply involving laughing face and scissors.

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    #20

    Thanks For Ruining It

    Text exchange showing a brutal response to an ex, with a humorous and blunt reply about the day's status.

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    #21

    Hi And Bye

    Text message with a brutal response: “I miss you” met with laughter and “Bye.”

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    #22

    New Phone, Who Dis?

    Brutal response to ex text about flooding, sender claims they drowned.

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    #23

    Text From Ex

    Text conversation with a brutal response to an ex, highlighting blocking intentions.

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    #24

    All Things Come To An End

    Text exchange with a brutal response: "I miss you" followed by a witty reply about the Spice Girls.

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    #25

    Hard Pass

    Brutal response to ex's cuddling request, including a fiery comeback.

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    #26

    Feelings For You

    Text conversation showing a brutal response to an ex's message.

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    #27

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to an ex text message: "Hey how have you been?" and a sharp reply about past infidelity.

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    #28

    Bad Taste And Low Standards

    Text exchange showing a brutal response to an ex about bad taste and low standards.

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    #29

    Keep On Keeping On

    Brutal response to ex's text expressing missing feelings: "Keep never doing that."

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    #30

    What's Up

    Text conversation with ex, showing a photo of a couple with a response saying "No." and "Lmao okay."

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    #31

    A Huge Waste Of Time

    Text message exchange showcasing a brutal response to an ex, highlighting a contact named "Waste of Time."

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    #32

    Punch In The Face

    Brutal response to ex text about joining a boxing gym, humorously anticipating a punch.

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    #33

    Thanks, But No Thanks

    Brutal response to ex text conversation with a casual rejection; blue chat bubble declines the invitation.

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    #34

    Trash Day

    Text message exchange showing a brutal response to an ex, discussing porch and trash day plans.

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    #35

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to ex text with initial hope followed by disappointment.

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    #36

    Truly Inappropriate

    Text message response to an ex about inappropriateness after cheating.

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    #37

    But I Still Love You

    Brutal response to ex text saying "We dated for two months, 9 years ago."

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    #38

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to an ex's text asking for belongings back.

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    #39

    Just Nope

    Brutal ex text response with a short, dismissive reply to a complimented message.

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    #40

    A Lousy Essay

    Text exchange with a brutal response highlighting an ex's mistake, mentioning Kanye and Kim.

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    #41

    Had A Snack, Too

    Ex text exchange showing a sarcastic reply about stealing a pillow and eating nectarines.

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    #42

    How High Are You

    Funny and brutal response to an ex’s text exchange, involving unexpected humor.

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    #43

    Hint Hint

    Text response to ex with engagement ring on hand as brutal reply.

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    #44

    Well, Can We?

    Funny brutal response to ex text about watching Netflix instead of getting back together.

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    #45

    The Thing I Miss

    Text conversation showing a brutal response to an ex, focusing on missing paid meals.

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    #46

    Eggplant Emoji

    Brutal response to ex text with eggplant emoji reference.

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    #47

    It's Your Wedding Day

    Brutal text exchange with an ex during their wedding day.

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    #48

    Text From Ex

    A brutal response to an ex's text expressing anger and contradiction in a conversation.

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    #49

    Not Keeping Tabs Here

    Brutal response to ex texts highlights ongoing emotional repercussions.

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    #50

    As Far As I Can

    Text conversation displaying a humorous and brutal response to an ex's message about living location preferences.

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    #51

    Personal Show

    TV showing "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" with a humorous text message response, highlighting brutal ex text.

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    #52

    Congrats And Good Luck

    Brutal response to ex's text about engagement showing no hope for reconciliation.

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    #53

    Text From Ex

    Brutal responses to ex texts illustrate awkward conversation dynamics with humor.

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    #54

    Tough One To Let Go

    Texting a brutal response with a "never let go" Titanic meme reply.

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    #55

    I Know

    Brutal response to an ex: "I want you back" met with "ya I know."

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    #56

    Not With You

    Brutal response to ex's text, saying "Not with you," followed by "Ouch" and a crying emoji.

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    #57

    Should've Kept It To Yourself

    Text conversation with a brutal response about fake cooking confession.

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    #58

    Say No To Satan

    Text exchange showing a brutal response to an ex: "Not today satan."

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    #59

    God Bless

    Text conversation showing a brutal response to an ex's apology message.

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    #60

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to ex text: Car parked on glasses.

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    #61

    Sorting Things Out

    Text exchange showing a brutal response to an ex about an engagement ring and years spent.

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    #62

    Personal Space

    Text message response with galaxy and planet images, featuring a brutal reply about needing space.

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    #63

    Drunk Texting

    Brutal response to ex text: "Please ignore drunk texts sent in the middle of the night."

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    #64

    Hey Hey Hey

    Text conversation with a brutal response to an ex: "New phone, who’s this?" followed by "Sorry, wrong number."

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    #65

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to ex text, showing a conversation about blocking a number.

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    #66

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to ex text featuring laughing emojis and a dismissive "Bye" message.

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    #67

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response to ex's text about talking, mentioning breakup and missing Sonicare.

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    #68

    Text From Ex

    Text message showing a leg tattoo of a Hannya mask followed by a humorous response to an ex.

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    #69

    Text From Ex

    Text exchange with brutal response comparing relationship to fireworks photo.

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    #70

    Text From Ex

    Brutal response text paired with a hand showing an engagement ring.

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