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27 Pet Peeves And Red Flags When You First Start Dating Someone, As Pointed Out By Folks Online
Love at first sight, of course, sometimes happens to people, but is this enough for a strong, healthy and happy relationship? Yes, sometimes a kind of spark runs between people who have known each other for just a few minutes, but the flame flared up from it can just as quickly go out.
There are actually many reasons for this. A person can be incredibly beautiful on the outside, but be an absolute jerk by their nature. You may not share some beliefs with another person, certain habits may annoy you so much... In the end, you may root for different teams - this also happens and sometimes leads to a breakup, trust us.
In any case, there are various things that can signal that something is totally off. "Just stop, turn around and leave right now before it gets worse!" they say. But how do you recognize such signs, especially if you are not an overly perceptive person?
In the AskReddit community, a special thread has recently appeared, just dedicated to these red flags. Its author originally asked the question: "What's a dealbreaker when it comes to dating?" and as of today, the thread boasts over 6.0K upvotes and about the same number of different comments.
Of course, not all of these comments are equally wholesome, and even more so, not all of them should be taken as a guide to action. To make it easier for you to read, Bored Panda has compiled a list of the most popular, useful and sometimes even funny signs that serve as a clear signal to a variety of people - it's time to end your relationship with this person!
So feel free to scroll to the very end of the list, mark the submissions you like or believe the most and, of course, write your own red flags in the comments. If, of course, you have at least one.
More info: Reddit
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#3
Putting One's Hands On Another Person
Don’t ever put your hands on me. I can’t be serious enough. I don’t care about your emotions. Don’t care if it was a 1/10th of a second of insanity or a miscommunication or you thought I was cheating. Don’t ever put your hands on me. I spent too much time as a child dealing with people who hit me and I’ll be damned if I let it happen again. There is zero excuse for adults to hit each other.
#8
Different Beliefs On Having Children
As someone who doesn't want children, dating someone who does is a dealbreaker. Suffered a couple broken hearts over having to make this decision...
#9
Mind Games
Mind games. If you still want to do that in your 20's or 30's you are not mentally old enough to be with me.
#11
Attempting To Justify Any Behavior By Coincidence
If you expect me to excuse s***ty behavior because of the position the stars were in when you were born.
#13
Being Too Dramatical
Drama. At this point I’ve been through too much s**t and value my peace way more than I value someone I’ve just met’s feelings.
#15
Consuming Alcohol Too Much
Alcoholics. I love to drink and smoke, but in moderation. That’s just me, though.
#17
Inconsistency In Behavior And Words
Inconsistency in behaviours and words. Nothing tires me out like people who are not clear in their intentions. Im not going to navigate in troubled waters, when I can swim in clear ones
#19
Trying To Change You The Way They Want
When u notice that they want to change you into ways they like more, subtle hints at start but progressively they get more ballsy
#20
Being Obsessed With Themselves
The date being obsessed with themselves or continually talking about their ex partners
#21
Being A "Fix Me" Person
A ‘fix me’ person. I will support you to be your best. But I am not responsible to fix you.
#22
Making Another Person Feel Unsafe
Well this will completely get buried, but I'll add mine here anyway for posterity. - Anyone who makes me feel unsafe. Whether that's anger issues, boundary breaking, reckless lifestyle, woman bashing, or just a spidey sense, I'm out. - People with no firm opinions or values, can't keep up any mildly challenging conversation. Life's more fun with those who dare think for themselves. - Immaturity and codependence. I'm looking to pair up, not to parent. - Grating on my nerves. I don't know, some people just annoy me in the longer term. Like they're too boisterous or crass. That one's on me, I'm sensitive. - Petty meanness and dickishness. Spoiled adults who expect everyone in the service industry to kiss the ground they walk on. Who are snide to others. Who have something to prove all the time. Who regularly fail at life's empathy checks. It's pretty much the worst type of person imo. - Me: sometimes I am the dealbreaker. When I'm not ready to be a good partner to someone else. Even though they're great and the timing just didn't line up.
#23
Dating Just To Get Healed From The Previous Relationship
As a young woman that has dipped her toes into dating. A deal breaker for me is someone who has just come out of a long committed relationship and is out dating without giving themselves a proper healing stage.
#24
Being Clearly Unable To Have Time To Develop A Relationship
being clearly unable to have time to develop a relationship. We all have jobs,hobbies and a social life. if you can't administrate your time to make an effort into getting involved with me, I will walk out of your life really quickly
#25
Not Respecting Boundaries
i have a lot, but these are the main ones. when they're obsessive and expect me to talk and stick by them 24/7.. i am a person, i have a life. they are not my world, theyre just a part of it. when they get jealous easily and dont communicate with me. when they don't respect boundaries. when they dont know how to communicate properly and only think of themself.
#26
Using Mental Illness As Part Of One's Identity
Using their mental illness as part of their identity. No attempt to truly address it and leverage their illness to guilt others.
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