“AITA For Telling My Father And His GF That The Gift She Got Me Was Creepy And Invasive?”

Pregnancy is a deeply personal experience and everyone has their own vision of how they want it to unfold. For one mom-to-be, the excitement of her first child has been met with a mix of joy and unexpected challenges.

With her due date approaching, Reddit user BirthVidThrow received a videographer’s services as a Christmas present to film the childbirth. But the problem was that she didn’t want it. In fact, the woman had repeatedly expressed that she found the idea repulsive.

However, her refusal of the gift made her dad’s girlfriend—the one who had arranged the surprise—emotional, and the lady quickly became defensive, further escalating the tension.

Childbirth is often accompanied by a mix of physical, emotional, and psychological challenges

Pregnant woman in lace dress standing in garden, hands on her belly, serene and thoughtful.

Image credits: Leah Newhouse/Pexels (not the actual photo)

And this woman’s dad and his girlfriend wanted to record hers

Text screenshot about a father's girlfriend giving a creepy and invasive gift.

Text discusses differing personalities and a complex relationship with father's girlfriend.

Text about differences in opinions on influencer culture and pregnancy influencer content.

Text block discussing influencer's birth video shared with family outside delivery room, described as poorly edited and cutesy.

Person opening a wrapped gift at a dining table with green tablecloth and cutlery nearby.

Image credits: cottonbro studio/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Text about receiving a creepy and invasive gift during a family Christmas celebration.

Creepy gift concerns with a business card offering birth filming services.

Text expressing discomfort and boundaries regarding filming during a medical procedure, highlighting feelings of invasion.

Text about sharing discomfort with a gift from a father's girlfriend.

Text discusses argument over a "creepy and invasive" gift related to filming a personal moment during a child's birth.

Text discussing family disagreement over a gift, seeking validation with "AITA" query.

Image credits: BirthVidThrow

Vicki Broadbent of Honest Mum says the woman shouldn’t (be forced to) accommodate others

Triplets Want Individual "Sweet 16s", Tell Mom To Get An Extra Job If She Can't Afford It

Image credits: Honest Mum

Our parenting expert Vicki Broadbent, who runs the acclaimed family and lifestyle blog Honest Mum, has a teen, tween and a toddler, and she believes that when it comes to pregnant women, their needs and decisions are what matter.

“Try not to assert unsolicited opinions onto others, however well-meaning you might be,” the author of Mumboss (UK) and The Working Mom (US and Canada) told Bored Panda. “By all means, give advice when asked but try not to be judgmental or didactic.”

The author of the post was absolutely right in highlighting the vulnerable nature of delivery. Severe injuries can occur during childbirth and subsequently impact her mental or physical health. Up to 45% of mothers report experiencing birth trauma, and up to 33% of them develop symptoms of PTSD.

Common causes of birth trauma include:

• Emergency C-section;
• Provider mistreatment, lack of respect, or obstetric violence;
• NICU transfer;
• Poor pain relief;
• Injury;
• A very long labor;
• Precipitous labor.

Symptoms of PTSD from birth trauma include:

• Flashbacks or intrusive thoughts about your birth experience;
• Nightmares;
• Difficulty sleeping;
• Anxiety;
• Extreme fear of another pregnancy or birth;
• Difficulty bonding with your baby.

When the stakes are this high, everyone deserves to feel safe, respected and heard.

Having a baby is one of the biggest events in a person’s life, and since it comes with a lot of physical and emotional challenges, supporting them can make a huge difference. Instead of forcing your definition of a perfect delivery on them, you can cook healthy meals, be active together, and stay positive and hopeful about what’s to come. The lady who is so determined to bring a camera into the delivery room should understand that no two pregnancies are alike and try to minimize stress—not add to it.

“Pregnancy is a challenging time emotionally and physically with research showing it is as demanding as running a 40-week marathon,” Vicki Broadbent added.

“It’s also highly personal. Offering a videographer to film the birth is not appropriate unless this was requested by the woman giving birth.”

Two people holding a sonogram and pregnancy test, discussing a gift that feels creepy and invasive.

Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)

As her story went viral, the woman replied to some of the comments

Reddit comment discussing boundaries with father and his girlfriend during childbirth.

Reddit discussion on a gift being perceived as creepy and invasive.

Reddit discussion about a creepy and invasive gift, involving privacy concerns and sharing videos.

Text conversation discussing a gift being creepy and invasive, with supportive responses.

Reddit comment discussing birth privacy concerns and managing unannounced visits.

Reddit comments discussing alternatives to a videographer for a baby's first birthday.

Suggestions on using a gift in a comfortable way, involving baby's early moments, discussed in a comment thread.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment thread discussing the age difference between a person and their father's girlfriend.

Reddit comments discussing HIPAA laws and videography in hospitals, related to a conversation with a father’s girlfriend.

Pretty much all of the people who read the story said the woman hasn’t done anything wrong

Reddit comment discussing boundaries and a gift seen as creepy and invasive.

Reddit comment about a father's girlfriend's gift described as creepy and invasive.

Reddit comment discussing a creepy and invasive gift situation.

Comment on gift being creepy and invasive, mentioning Oscar Mayer Wienermobile parking pass.

Reddit comment expressing discomfort over a personal recording, deemed creepy and invasive.

But there’s always one person

Reddit comment discussing the feelings of awkwardness from receiving a creepy and invasive gift.

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