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Swimming in warm water in the summertime. Placing the final piece of a puzzle that’s taken you months to complete. ‘Roasting’ someone online with a comeback so witty and so savage, they had to call the ‘Oh Snap’ and fire brigades. All three things have one thing in common—they’re all human experiences that make us feel gooood.
The ‘Clever Comebacks’ subreddit is one of the best places on the net to go to for awesome retorts that will forever be enshrined on the internet in online screenshots. Check out some of the most on-point and hilarious comebacks they posted ever. Remember to upvote your fave ones and we hope they’ll inspire you to show off your wit the next time someone says something dumb or has a go at you.
Bored Panda was interested to learn about what makes comebacks witty and about comedic timing, so we reached out to comedy writer and author of 'How to Live to 100,' Ariane Sherine. Read on to learn what she told us. What’s the best comeback that you’ve ever said or heard in real life, dear Readers? Do you think that the pen is mightier than the sword? Share your thoughts with all of us in the comments.
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#1
I Understand Completely
CatWoman312 4 years ago
This makes me sad. And if hell is real I’m sure all the conquistadors are there
Monika Soffronow 4 years ago
Hell is real for a lot of people. Right here on earth. War, illness, exploitation, slavery, etc, etc, etc.
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Fixin'Ta 4 years ago
As a Christian, I just want to apologize for the horrific ways in which those who have claimed the faith have gone about sharing the Gospel (which means "Good News") in ways that dishonor and break the heart of the God they were/are supposed to represent. I'm pretty sure a bunch of those Spaniards did not end up where they thought they were going.
MaeRose 4 years ago
Yh, I agree. They used heaven and christianity as an excuse to make slaves out of people and slaughter them. Two things the gospel clearly doesn't agree with.
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Monika Soffronow 4 years ago
Another one for all the lazy people who claim that religion is inherently benign, that it causes no harm.
Agnes Jekyll 4 years ago
Greed. The conquistadors murdered approximately 56 million South Americans--90% of the population by 1600. Scientists now believe this mass genocide resulted in a dip in the world's temperature.
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RELATED:
#2
Never Underestimate A Woman
Martha Meyer 4 years ago
I bet this same guy thinks he's qualified to talk about abortion even though he can't give birth.
Sophia Graubart 4 years ago
I have seen this before on bored panda, and personally i liked a comment that said "men, you can't give birth, sit down when abortions are discussed". I think Foxxy (the original) said it
Louloubelle 4 years ago
Oh, pooh. I think you're right. I knew I heard it here. She's very clever.
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Katie Gardner 4 years ago
We can’t be drafted but we still voluntarily sign up. I’m a female vet.
Louloubelle 4 years ago
Men you can't have babies. Now sit down and shut up when abortion is discussed.
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Yes, leave women out of war discussions. We just die in them. No concern of ours. *loads shotgun*
#3
“Migrants Can’t Assimilate Into Society”
Vic 4 years ago
What bothers me is the number of likes that comment has..
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F.S 4 years ago
She is a full blown ignorant racist. All her tweets are this vile but ofc she is pro-family, pro-life and a "christian"...yuck
Lilac Beauty 4 years ago
I am a Christian who is agrees with the fact that people from different nations should be able to come to the U.S. and that it is amazing how they are so successful and become lawyers, doctors, writers and much more. I also support the LGTBQ+ community completely and most of my friends are apart of it. Not all “Christians” are horrible judging hypocritical people.
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Ami Temi 4 years ago
Ah, I bet she feels superior with her so-called (fake) blonde Arian genes. Everyone's descendants have been refugees and immigrants at some point and conveniently forgetting that out of hate and greed is just pathetic. I bet she couldn't understand the difference between integration and assimilation. I really admire what the commenter has achieved. Such a beautiful example for everyone!
Bacony Cakes 4 years ago
What? I'm just telling the truth and also a joke about how every book seems to be a NYT bestseller!
Load More Replies... Anna Goanna 4 years ago
This woman is the worst! She actually ran for senate (and lost). She's a Quidiot, flat-earther, anti-masker and a not-so-discreet neo nazi. She blocked me on twitter, so please call her out on her s**t!
Anna Lessens 3 years ago
We will serve you well. * Sheaths katana and ninja rolls away*
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Juris Macto 4 years ago
It should be noted that this moron ran for Senator in Delaware. She was resoundingly defeated.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
Lauren Witzke lives in the US and thinks she lives in a civil society.
Xenia Granados 4 years ago
I had a teacher survive the Cambodian Genocide and now him and his 5 siblings are doctors!
Comedy writer Ariane told Bored Panda that, in her opinion, witty comebacks can be both spontaenous and planned out. "I've definitely come up with comebacks that are spontaneous. For instance, I told my daughter that if she didn't behave, I'd give her inheritance to a donkey sanctuary. She said, 'You wouldn't', and I came back, 'You bet your ass!' But though I hadn't used that comeback before, I clearly had knowledge of the pun and might have used something similar in the past."
She also pointed out something that honestly took me by surprise: "When it comes to stand-up, a lot of heckle putdowns are scripted and shared among comics." And here I thought that heckles were all instinctive and natural. I'll have to rethink some stuff about my fave comedians now.
#4
Love This Guy
KombatBunni 4 years ago
yeah that was a nasty one..medical help may be required
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Ekate 4 years ago
For those of us who do work out - we actually do it for men just like you....................so we can punch them hard in the nuts when the opportunity arises.
Bacony Cakes 4 years ago
No! You don't want your Dainty Dainty Woman Fingers™ (/s) to be damaged! Use a bat instead!
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Enalpria 4 years ago
Nice! In my Social studies class, we learned that originally historians thought that men did the hunting and women did the cleaning in prehistoric human society. But, a more recent study found that the men and the women shared the hunting and cooking! Gender equality for the win :D
Doubleheader 4 years ago
My husband and I are both equally shredded and now the world fears us.
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
I literally have a friend who has a real thing, SPECIFICALLY, for women with abs... That exact thing. It's not about looking manly, it's that toned flat tummy. Looking fit and healthy. Looking like you can keep up on a hike and play sports together, do their favorite things with them. Some guys will tell you nothing is sexier than a woman who gets sports. Simultaneously I'm the wimpiest martha stewart in a 5ft nothing package and my boyfriend still loves me. Men should not say what "men want", because men want different things. All are valid.
Louloubelle 4 years ago
Absolutely. When I met my husband I was 5'3", 98 lbs. And he thought I was beautiful. I'm now 5'2 3/4" (yes, I've shrunk) and 168 lbs. and he still thinks I'm beautiful.
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Louloubelle 4 years ago
Yeah, I'm kind of with you here. Especially when their veins are bulging. It's kind of terrifying.
Load More Replies... #5
Idk If This Has Been Posted Before, But I Love His Little Smile
Katie Lutesinger 4 years ago
The guy was almost completely paralysed and he still managed to follow up that burn with a smirk. My hero. XD
Joey Marlin 4 years ago
That's so much better than the extremely overused 'burn' that ends up on so very many posts.
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#6
People Really Live In Their Own Little Bubbles
izzy.kitsune 4 years ago
whoever is downvoting u is probably a trump supporter
Load More Replies... Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
"I go everywhere and rarely meet any Biden supporters" BECAUSE THEY ARE OBEYING SOCIAL DISTANCE RESTRICTIONS. *headdesk to an exponent of ten*
Minecraft Nube 4 years ago
How to find out who is a Biden supporter and who is not.... Biden supporter: wearing facemask, respectful Trump supporter: not wearing facemask, coughing in ppl's face.
Claire Armstrong 4 years ago
Lol, love it! What annoys me about the situation in America right now is the way that Trump supporters, and even Trump himself, can't believe that that many people voted for Joe Biden! Just because they wouldn't vote for him, doesn't mean everyone else shares their point of view! There are, what's it up to now 80 million votes for Biden, whatever the figure is let's say 80m, there are 80m people in the US that can't believe anyone would vote for Trump, it goes both ways! But, yes, their (Trump, and Trump supporters) attitudes towards the election annoy me greatly! And that's before we even get to the part of her "going everywhere" during a bloody global pandemic, probably not wearing a mask to boot!
Ariane said that the line between a regular comeback and one that makes us snort into our cups of tea is clear for everyone to see. "It needs to be very fast, well-timed, and take people by surprise as well as being clever, witty, and immediately understandable." So no pressure then!
The beauty of comedy, according to Ariane, is that (sometimes) our subconscious mind kicks in and takes us by surprise, along with the audience. "But that's relatively rare in my experience. I'm sure many other comics are more natural than I am!
#7
Please Wear A Mask And Stay Safe
Anne 4 years ago
A mask protects people from you. It doesn't protect you from other people. Since you are contagious before having symptoms, you wear a mask to prevent being a spreader.
Full of Giggles 4 years ago
The CDC recently announced cloth masks do provide two-way protection. https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/more/masking-science-sars-cov2.html
M O'Connell 4 years ago
The bigger issue is that people have gown to be so selfish, they can't even comprehend making a minor sacrifice to benefit their fellow humans.
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Hannah Burbridge 4 years ago
If a surgeon can wear one for 7 hours to reconstruct a patient's knee, you can wear one for 12 minutes to buy asparagus at Walmart.
Exquisite Spam 4 years ago
That's not how our masks work. They're to protect OTHER PEOPLE from YOU. Not the other way round. If you're in healthcare, then you may have ones that protect you.
Paul Neff 4 years ago
THIS... so much THIS!! These anti-maskers are so much like anti-vaxxers... all they do is repeat a false information talking point, with no genuine foundation of understanding.
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Norah Reilly 4 years ago
Do these idjits not understand that we wear masks to protect each other? Try reading up on things instead of relying on information that comes from people COMPLETELY UNQUALIFIED to give out valid advice.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
Actually, your masks protects everyone else but yourself. If you wear a mask in the presence of somebody who does not, you are the one in danger.
#8
You're The Problem
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
I am an incredibly happy feminist. I don't hate men. I feel for them too, sexism has hurt all the genders, in every way. I am happy to have hope for a better and less miserable future.
kasa alex 4 years ago
Yeah...I'm definitely a feminist, and also love hanging out with guys. Don’t hate men, not unhappy, just don't like gender inequality.
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MrsPossum 4 years ago
Dang, I wish I could come up with this kind of stuff quickly enough when it happens to me!! I always think of the perfect comeback about 2 hours later!!
Mary Peace 4 years ago
I guess the feminists are all happily enjoying their lives away from you.
François Carré 4 years ago
"Pseudo-intellectuals on the internet - They tell me I'm unhappy because I'm not feminine - Failing to consider that I may be unhappy because it's 3 AM - And I'm in the depths of Youtube watching them... whining" The Commandments of I, Saffiyah Khan
Morgan Carpenter 4 years ago
James Fell needs to carry around aloe for all those burns he's handing out.
#9
Thank You Andy Wang!
Truth Monster 4 years ago
cultural gatekeeping has got to be the dumbest thing I have ever seen. The best and most inclusive societies culturally appropriate all. the. time.
LittleMissLotus 4 years ago
Exactly. While cultural appropriation is, in some cases, a real thing, 99% of the incidents people are freaking out over is absolute BS, this being one of them. Cultural appropriation is specifically the disrespectful adoption of meaningful elements of a culture without recognition by privileged group. In this case, I don't think anybody is erasing where these holidays came from, nor are they celebrating in a way that's disrespectful to the holiday's origins. This person needs to do their research on what cultural appropriation really is
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Jill 4 years ago
You might also say, "You can't celebrate lunar new year if you're not from Earth!"
Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago
Of course I can’t speak on behalf of the Chinese but I always thought it was a celebration they encourage anyone to be a part of. Please correct me if I am wrong though, I do not mean any disrespect. I know that in Aus we have celebrations for the Lunar New Year and everyone is welcome.
Laugh or not 4 years ago
I think most celebrations are made to be inclusive. Hospitality and sharing are big parts of every culture on Earth - except Sentinels island.
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Patrick O'Harris 4 years ago
Yeah, why try to connect to other people and their culture if we can just sit all by ourself and stick to our own stuff? Pff, who needs multi-cultural interests?
Luisa Vasconcelos 4 years ago
Can someone explain to me without being a idiot or superior? I don't really understand this thing of cultural appropriation. If white X bride the hair is, but if black Y , put relaxer, straight the hair and paint blonde and even put a clear makeup then her skin tone nobody calls culture appropriation. It's a serious question and maybe silly but is a honest question.
H Edwards 4 years ago
The issue of Black hair has had essays and documentaries dedicated to it. It's actually bordering on political in the USA. Nothing that could be covered adequately in a BP comments section. As a white non-US woman, my understanding is naturally limited, but from what I gather there is a lot of pressure on Black women especially to alter their natural hair because it doesn't look beautiful/tidy/professional (not my opinion, but that's what wider society imposes). Here in the UK there is much less fuss about white people having traditionally Black hairstyles. When Adele dressed up for the Notting Hill Carnival with braids it was the Americans who kicked up a stink, I don't think Black Brits are so bothered. Could be wrong, of course, I don't have that many Black friends and I don't want to burden them with these conversations when I do see them.
Load More Replies... CatWoman312 4 years ago
Cultural appropriation is only wrong when you’re using it as a way to mock or bastardize a culture. Otherwise it’s appreciation
Clever Dog 4 years ago
I love culture, I love music, dress,art,language,dance ,history and its what makes us truly global and respect and love other cultures. I have been lucky enough to travel the globe and it is full on wonder. If we only did things from our "own culture" what a boring world it would be. That is where racism lives, to isolate yourself from another cultures treasures means you dont understand it or love it.
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
Friendly reminder: The US is a melting pot of cultures. I'm not Mexican, but I make and eat tacos. I'm not Armenian, but I listen to System of a Down. Being exposed to a wide variety of cultures is literally the best thing about living in the US.
Bacony Cakes 4 years ago
Friendly Reminder that we have to sort out our issues before we meet the aliens or we're gonna be in trouble.
The ‘Clever Comebacks’ community was founded in January 2018 and will be celebrating its 3-year anniversary very soon. In that time, they’ve amassed nearly 679k loyal members who are practicing the ancient art of the perfect comeback.
Personally, I think that comebacks are all about accurate, piercing, rapier-like wit. And the essence of wit is brevity, spontaneity, and stating the truth. It’s not a comeback if you spend an hour thinking about it and then another hour writing it out. Comebacks are the sniper rifles of the verbal battlefield. Not shotguns. Not machine guns. It’s all about one phrase—one roast.
The BBC tends to agree with my point of view. According to Rhea Wessel, witty comebacks can’t be planned—they can only be made in the moment. And timing is everything. Even if you come up with the perfect thing you could’ve said while you’re in the shower a day later, that amazing comeback is useless now. Too little. Too late.
#10
I Don’t Care If Repost Made Me Laugh
wandile dludlu 4 years ago
It's true, if they hated gay people so much, then why do they spend all their time with gay people. Even God had no time for people he didn't like, he just murdered them and told the people he liked to get on a boat
H Edwards 4 years ago (edited)
This reminds me of something that someone much smarter than me once said: The people who go around saying that homosexuality is a choice must also believe that they are choosing to be straight. Ergo suppressing their own homosexual desires. That could explain why so many outspoken anti-gay preachers and politicians end up getting caught shimmying down a drainpipe trying to leave a 25 man orgy (as happened recently in Hungary - edited to add it happened in Belgium but the politician was Hungarian)
Wolfstar 4 years ago
Why do people use their religion as an excuse to attack gay people? Like, personally, I don't know you, and I don't care what religion you are, just get out of my face. I'm not religious so quit trying to force your religion down my throat. When I say "stop it" I mean it.
Kitten claws 4 years ago
Why do people use their religion as an excuse to attack anything
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David K 4 years ago
As a straight man, all I can say is that the weirdo on the right can suck my duck.
Becca Gizmo the Squirrel 4 years ago
Why can't people just let people live? I hate that people hide behind the bible to treat people badly. It is one of the many reasons I ran from Christianity. Just let people live and be happy!! It takes more effort to hurt people than to make someone smile.
Louloubelle 4 years ago
When I hear people rail about homosexuality, I ask them in what position that person and their spouse have sex. I figure if they're going to stick their nose into someone's bedroom, so can I. Shockingly, they get offended.
Load More Replies... Id row 4 years ago
Those who yell the loudest are usually secretly super into what they're protesting. I bet that guy attends gay furry parties on the weekends.
Meyer Weinstock 4 years ago
Thank you. Upon reading the word 'furry' I proceeded to spit out my coffee onto the computer screen. I appreciate the laugh. :-)
Load More Replies... Ekate 4 years ago
Haha! Yes! Boy is he going to do some thinking when he gets home! (Hopefully).
Louloubelle 4 years ago
He's never going to be able to go protest without thinking of this now. Good.
Load More Replies... CatWoman312 4 years ago
All he has to do is read a little bit more into it. The translation was not accurate and the context regards incest, not homosexuality. I know bigoted homophobes are totally against researching and thinking for themselves though
Agnes Jekyll 4 years ago
the passages of the Bible they quote prohibit rape--it's not about homosexuality.
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#11
Illegal Plants
Kirsten Kerkhof 4 years ago
Adam and Eve. The first humans who did not read the Apple terms and conditions before agreeing.
cursed--alien 4 years ago
Actually, apples were not known to the original writers, so the fruit in its original text was probably not an apple, but a fig.
Load More Replies... Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago
Oof, never thought about that before but it is true. And apparently we have been suffering the consequences for thousands of years after the fact. AND we had nothing to do with it. I thought God was meant to be fair and loving.
Christian Bradshaw 4 years ago
This is just my opinion, but I'm actually not sure if the events in the Garden of Eden would have affected us either way. I mean, look at humanity now. It seems almost IMPOSSIBLE that someone along the line would have sinned anyways. Adam and Eve were just the first
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Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
No. One of the first things God ever did was set Adam and Eve up to fail. Neither one was aware of the concepts of good and evil until AFTER they had eaten from the Tree. Yet God not only punished them, but also the entire human race until the end of time. Omnibenevolent, my ass.
Minecraft Nube 4 years ago
Look, we would sin no matter what, stealing, crimes, murder. God didnt "set" Adam and Eve to fail. They took the fruit even when God said not to. The Devil tempted them to do it. The human race would have sinned no matter what. We still sin now, everyday. So therefore we never deserve to stop being punished. Unless you can tell me that you have never sinned before????
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#12
British Museum
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
"I"m Arthur, King of the Bri'ons" "Who are these Bri'ons?" ... --- Constitutional peasants, "Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail"
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Caroline Overill 4 years ago
Actually loads of countries have museums with artifacts that don't belong to that country
Calypso 4 years ago
that's right, countries that looted/colonized other countries usually put their stuff in their museums.
Load More Replies...That’s actually the beauty of comebacks. Sometimes, you end up just as surprised by your wit as everyone else is. It’s like, for a single beautiful moment, the Spirit of Absolute Roasting possessed you and gave you glorious guidance.
Abigail Paul, the artistic director at the Theatre Language Studio in Frankfurt, told the BBC that we can improve our wit by giving ourselves just a bit of extra time to craft a great answer. Strangely enough, that involves becoming a better listener. We need to train ourselves to listen to others and respond appropriately, instead of tuning out and only thinking about the points we want to make in the discussion. That way, you’ll be more than ready to mount a witty defense because you won’t be caught unaware.
#13
This Is A Really Good Reply To Trump's Tweet
Juris Macto 4 years ago
How FFS, do you bankrupt a casino? Seriously, people literally come and give you money until they're broke.
Smitten Kitten 4 years ago
I think Jeff sits there with his fingers hovering above his keyboard waiting for Trump to tweet - He's always there without fail.
Mark Evans 4 years ago
Or when Mike Pence caused a HIV outbreak when he was Governor of Indiana... then Trump made him in charge of the Covid-19 taskforce.
Claire Armstrong 4 years ago
Aww, I love Jeff Tiedrich lol! He's ALWAYS got some belters for Trump lol!
#14
Raw Skiny Jeans Bat
Vic 4 years ago
Batman: *punches a baddie..* *stops to sanitize hands before punching next guy*
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i'll sleep when im dead 4 years ago
Yes. That was a bad, bad choice of words. Raw, maybe. At a stretch. Not Sanitized? Seriously?
Meyer Weinstock 4 years ago
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#15
Useless Trees
izzy.kitsune 4 years ago
whoever keeps downvoting foxxy, calm down, it was a joke jeeeeez, no need to be mean to her
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Norah Reilly 4 years ago
Einstein is supposed to have observed that, "two things are infinite; the universe and stupidity. I have doubts about the universe."
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
No no it's the forests that give the oxygen... The trees are just in the way.
François Carré 4 years ago
I'm not sure I would even feel like answering this kind of obnoxious entitled bullsh*t. There are way too many of these people who believe that everything that lives on Earth must have a purpose dedicated to their own selfish comfort.
Mary Peace 4 years ago
"So in response to your request, trees will give off wi-fi, and only wi-fi...sorry you won't be around to make use of it!"
#16
What An Awful Way To Protect The Elderly
Philly Bob Squires 4 years ago
If Rump told her dogshit was orange and tasted like fruit, she'd eat it.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
Trump: "I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters, OK?" And it's true....
K. 4 years ago
My immigrant grandmother who relies on all her kids and Medicare for the last 25 years^^^ She definitely got the better end of the deal. People fight for her health and benefits while she fights against it, while wanting to keep it. Grandma, sit down before they think you’ve gone senile.
Alison Wells 4 years ago
I'd say the only senior he protects is himself, but even then I'm not sure if that's accurate.
Minecraft Nube 4 years ago
nope its not accurate, what about the owner of the steel company(the only reason why he wanted to build a billion dollar wall out of steel), and what about the 3 supreme court members that he nominated(one of them is a rapist), what about his little gun gang of followers that sit in front of the voting office while holding guns, if they werent alive he wouldn't even become president in 2016
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#17
Rage Against Something
Candace Fitzpatrick 4 years ago
How did this person become "a fan" in the first place of an artist who went to Harvard to study political science, and is a known political activist? It’s like saying I was a fan of Freddy Kruger until he kept killing all those teenagers...
Lauren Caswell 4 years ago
And you just know ol Freddy would have an excuse: Those who died, are justified :p
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Wendillon 4 years ago
I don't quite get this mentality...I can like someone's music without agreeing with their views, just like I can enjoy movies containing actors who are pieces of crap in real life. The person doesn't need to taint the art.
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
Welll... I don't think many people still enjoy watching Bill Cosby. Just like you have to be a sociopath to actually enjoy Hitler's watercolours (which are rather accomplished).
Load More Replies... over it already 4 years ago
Hilarious! Rage has always been incredibly political & it's one of the reasons I love them so! Right after I learned Spanish, I also watched some videos of concerts (? maybe just one) they did in Mexico and loved that commentary as well. Rage Against the Machine = great band name and generally great advice as well.
Astrid Nineor 4 years ago
Well, to be honest I rage against machines quite often. Usually my work laptop.
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
music is sometimes used to express political opinions, you don't like it, listen to someone else, but don't complain about political music just because you missed the message in the lyrics the first time
#18
Actions Speak Louder Than Words.
Patricia Murray 4 years ago
There's two versions to these pictures. I was always taught the other version. That someone said she was so beautiful she would make even a potato sack look good. Not as mean spirited as the other version.
Stannous Flouride 4 years ago
Supposedly, in 1951, Marilyn Monroe attended a party at the Beverly Hills Hotel wearing a red dress. The “provocative”, low cut dress, drew the ire of a female columnist, who called her ‘cheap and vulgar’. She even went on to say that Monroe would have looked better wearing a potato sack. A few days later, Twentieth Century Fox took advantage of the situation and organized a photo shoot that saw Monroe posing in a potato sack dress, that was designed especially for her. Another story is that someone at 20th Century Fox said, "Marilyn could make a potato sack look sexy." Both are probably apocryphal and it was a clever, but very memorable PR stunt.
H Edwards 4 years ago
She was a size 4-6 for most of her career, which wasn't unusual for actors back then. She had an extreme hourglass figure as well, with a tiny waist and a big bust. She was never plus-sized though, as some people like to claim she was.
Load More Replies... #19
Separate Payments
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
My sis did that. Tore up a tenner in an era when that was a pair of jeans and a Pepsi. My mom calmly taped it back together, took it to th ebank, with me and me sis at her side. They gave her a new tenner for the damaged one, and Mom then handed the tenner to *me*. ........ Lesson learned.
Ileana Sky Aviles 4 years ago
Make them glue it back together and work twice as hard for the next one.
Kat Kirkpatrick 4 years ago
That's it...kid does not need an allowance after this. Kid wants money? Kid needs to work for it just like adults do. Giving in to spoiled brats who do this means selfish, entitled, a**h**e adults that nobody likes.
niki.bordeaux 4 years ago
Kid can't handle money, so kid won't get any money until it can. Problem solved.
Minecraft Nube 4 years ago
i dont even get an allowance.. even after all the chores i do :c
Load More Replies... #20
They Also Don't Come In Exciting Anime
Vic 4 years ago
Tiger1: Tiger!! Tiger2: Shut up, Hank! Look you made the food run away again.
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Lauren Caswell 4 years ago (edited)
Omg best mental image of walking into a kitchen, seeing a mouse, and we both shout "Mouse!" XD
Astrid Nineor 4 years ago
You should send that idea to a candid camera show
Load More Replies... Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
There are fewer than 900 Pokémons but several millions of different living animal species... Using percentages to compare those wo categories is just plain stupid !
Christian Bradshaw 4 years ago
Plus, those numbers don't compare. There are FAR fewer pokemon than there is wildlife
Robert Thornburrow 4 years ago
How do you know they don't? They could all be shouting their names at the tops of their voices and we're just too stupid to understand.
Karla Torres 4 years ago
Are you telling me that the cute quack quack bird, is not called quack quack? Next you will tell me that the woof woof pet, is not called woof...and the one that says meow...
#21
Depression vs. Asthma
Kel Gal 4 years ago
AlphaPuck, depression is absolutely physical, too. Please do your research.
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Mary Peace 4 years ago
As an asthmatic who has suffered depression, this was the big cheer-up, the best laugh ever!
Joseph Brzezinski 4 years ago
Yeah, except that the amount of "air" doesn't matter, it is like breathing through a straw, it doesn't matter how much air there is, if you can't physically get the air into your lungs...
Felype Rennan 4 years ago (edited)
Life is not beautiful though, it has been scientifically observed that we're here to suffer and fight to survive which is not beautiful or fun. We have the almighty luck of being human and having a protective "anti-nature" bubble, society, that allows us to do things other than just surviving. That is somewhat beautiful, not very much, because society is a mirror of the s**t dog-eat-dog nature out there, but it's fine.
#22
Big Footprints To Fill
Zachariah M. Baird 4 years ago
But Spongebob lives near the Bikini Atoll...in the pacific.
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A.M. Pierre 4 years ago
I recycle. I conserve. I try. Not because I think it will change things when there are massive corporations polluting massively, but because I know I'd feel terrible if I behaved like they do.
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
Well, they stopped the oil from turning into emissions, technically...
Sigmand Froid 4 years ago
And sea creatures paid heavily for that, with their lives. Thats a huge sacrifice.
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Daniel Moore 4 years ago
60 million barrels of oil seep into the ocean every year from naturally from the ocean floor.
Panda Mona 4 years ago
Great answer. Respect! The first step to reducing emmissions is to see clearly that single customers behaviour won´t change the whole situation very much
JessieJ&LilyLovebug 1 year ago
So, I was working today, and looking at all the plastic, all the plastic I was instructed to throw away, and all the new slightly different plastic sent in...and let me just say every human on Earth could do their part, and it wouldn't make a dent in the MASSIVE amount of trash produced by each and every company. It's infuriating.
#23
Not Mine But On Point
N G 4 years ago
Fierce and powerful women can sometimes marry jackasses. But they seem happy enough
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pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
To hell with the bod, good dads in general are a plus. Give me someone reliable and responsible with small children.
Elizabeth Molloy 4 years ago
Personally the ripped body type is a turn-off. It also shows a high degree of self-centeredness.
Michael Scott 4 years ago
YO THERE GONNA BE A SHREK 5!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjQZaD9EEJ0
4 years ago
Yeah shrek's legit as f**k. It's shoulda made ten times the amount it did. also, bro fiona liked shrek's "dad bod" so there
Michael Scott 4 years ago
fr tho! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjQZaD9EEJ0
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Hayley Rodgers 4 years ago
I personally find those body types off-putting. And male stripping grosses me out. Gag
Mari Bryant 4 years ago
Big assumption that it was the majority females who bought the Magic Mike tickets...or the Shrek tickets. 🤔🧐
#24
Another Reason To Love The Beatles
Mike Pence's Fly 4 years ago
Oh, shoot guys. We all posted today, the day he was shot. December 8th, 1980. We will forever remember this great artist.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
As a foreigner, this is something I still not understand. Is "un-american" supposed to be an insult? I mean... Is everything which is not from the United States of America necessarily evil and unworthy for some supernatural reason? Jesus was an Israeli, banknotes are chinese, pizzas are italian, movies are french, cars are german, and planes are as british as the people who created this country only 244 years ago.
#25
Elite Finish
Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago
What kind of relationship is that. We don’t have his money or my money, it is OUR money.
Nomadus Aureus 4 years ago
After having been in a not-so-very-healthy relationship, I can tell you, there's very much going to be a "my money" and a "his money" and a joint account for joint expenses. IF I ever decide to start dating again, because frankly, I really don't feel like it.
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pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
I would like to say that while my bf and I do share the rent, there's nothing wrong with having different cultural ideals. If you want to be a housewife and not have an income, find a relationship where you are both ok with that. It's about finding the right one for you... we all have different ideas we subscribe to, the only thing to be concerned about is if you are both happy that way.
Celtic Pirate Queen 4 years ago
I'm thinking you need to be paying "halves" on a marriage counselor.
CatWoman312 4 years ago (edited)
My husband and I go half on all the bills. That’s how relationships should work
Full of Giggles 4 years ago (edited)
Husband could turn the tables when she asks for child support.
Panda Mona 4 years ago
I would pack my bags if I would see that my relationship ends up into tweets like that ...
#26
Flameproofing? But My House Isn't On Fire!
Hugh Cookson 4 years ago
The level of ignorance shown by this idiot (the one who doesn't want the vaccine), is how the USA ended up with the orange haired cretin in the Whitehouse for the last 4 years ...... what a moron.
Ashley Farrell 4 years ago
As a veterinary nurse... Someone wanted to bring in a Prarie dog, they were going to keep it as a pet, I said no put it back outside they carry the bubonic plague, they asked if they could have it vaccinated for plague so they could still keep it
BabaBizzle 4 years ago
They “ain’t got” spoke volumes about their stance on the virus and knowledge of how anything science based works. Dumbass doesn’t deserve to be protected.
#27
Flat Earthers Make Me Happy Because I Know I'm Not A Complete Failure
Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago
Is this just a joke to tease flat earthers or do flat earthers actually use the “flat” horizon as their argument? Do they not realise that we can’t see the curve because the earth is so large.
N G 4 years ago
Sorry, Foxxy, but some do use that as an argument. The mental gymnastics required to stick to their beliefs in the face of evidence that *sometimes they themselves generate on camera* is truly staggering
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Agfox 4 years ago
I recall reading a post by a guy who'd been booted from a Reddit flatearth sub for asking how many people had been pushed over the edges because of the need for social distancing
TheWitchNaru 4 years ago
I cannot understand this flat earther crap. And I quote, (via NASA website) It has actually been known that the Earth was round since the time of the ancient Greeks. I believe that it was Pythagoras who first proposed that the Earth was round sometime around 500 B.C. As I recall, he based his idea on the fact that he showed the Moon must be round by observing the shape of the terminator (the line between the part of the Moon in light and the part of the Moon in the dark) as it moved through its orbital cycle. Pythagoras reasoned that if the Moon was round, then the Earth must be round as well. After that, sometime between 500 B.C. and 430 B.C., a fellow called Anaxagoras determined the true cause of solar and lunar eclipses - and then the shape of the Earth's shadow on the Moon during a lunar eclipse was also used as evidence that the Earth was round.
TheWitchNaru 4 years ago
Around 350 BC, the great Aristotle declared that the Earth was a sphere (based on observations he made about which constellations you could see in the sky as you travelled further and further away from the equator) and during the next hundred years or so, Aristarchus and Eratosthenes actually measured the size of the Earth!
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Yea Imma Cat Butt 4 years ago
I think that considering the abundant proof that earth is not flat, I think that flat earthers just want attention or something to argue about.
Elizabeth Molloy 4 years ago
"Look at me!!! I'm smarter than ALL of you! Pay me attention!!". Sad people.
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sorlag110 4 years ago
But if a boat passed that horizon from where the camera is standing... Wait, what does flat earthers think the horizon is?
TheWitchNaru 4 years ago
The edge of the planet. Where you fall off the planet and into space.
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Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Climb high enough, you see the curve. Flat-earthers must simply just be too lazy to take a hike or look out a plane window?...
#28
Does This Count? The Author Actually Replied Back To Me Lmao
Jill 4 years ago
I could say the same thing about Stewart's Calculus book as well. (For those of you not in the know, the physics book he mentioned is one of the most popular physics 101 books used at universities.)
CatWoman312 4 years ago (edited)
I’m sure he cried because it was hard not because it wasn’t useful or because it was way overpriced at the university bookstore
The Cute Cat 4 years ago
Damn I want to have a chat with my fav book writer.. Anyone know Evelyn C. Pearce who wrote anatomy for nurses??
sylvantic 4 years ago
last book that made me cry/feel like crying: Wayward Son by Rainbow Rowell.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
"Notre dame de Paris" is the last book that made me cry... It is such a old, large hardback book, and it was on the top shelf.
Bee Jairrels 4 years ago
Unfortunately I no book has made me cry thanks to my dry emotions....
#29
That Last Line Though
Wendillon 4 years ago
So because the warning label on a bottle of bleach says not to drink it, are you just going to blindly follow it and not drink the bleach? What if it tastes really good??
Stannous Flouride 4 years ago
The Dunning-Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which people wrongly overestimate their knowledge or ability in a specific area. This tends to occur because a lack of self-awareness prevents them from accurately assessing their own skills. (I had to look it up) BT_2019051...8796c5.jpg 
Marky Mark 4 years ago
Just because NASA says the atmosphere on Venus is deadly you automatically believe them? Do you own research.
seahawks fan 4 years ago
so just because someone tells you not to stand in front of train you just blindly follow their orders?
TheGr81sComing 4 years ago
Dunning Kruger: simplified, someone who dosent do art but thinks they are good might think they are a natural picasso. While someone who worked hard to make good art might know they arent good because they think they arent trying hard enough
Vikram Bedi 4 years ago
Would listening to them with eyes open make a difference? Are they blinking a secret message for those listening with their eyes...
⋌༼ •̀ ⌂ •́ ༽⋋ 4 years ago
I wonder why people think children cant wear masks, we are perfectly capable of wearing masks! Wear a mask people!
#30
Left vs. Right
Wendillon 4 years ago
Well...I shouldn't have laughed. One ticket to hell please.
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Łukasz Markuszewski 4 years ago
If someone want to see rightwing architecture this person should check on how cities were looking like before the war. Dark and dirty slums without water, heating and toilets, overcrowded, inhabitated by underpaid industry workers, few families in every flat. This was quite normal before that terrible socialist modernism came and create public housing, planned neighbourhoods with green areas, light and schools so the people could finally live in decent conditions.
Catarina Vilar 4 years ago
And they just had to rob, enslave and kill millions of people to do it, what ingenious people they were! Also, France and Belgium really needed an upgrade right? Paris especially was a great example of dark and dirty slums at the time. And all those poor jews with all their art collections, beautiful mansions and economic power were really living in insufferable conditions before the war.
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Janet Bird 4 years ago
This is a very scary thread. I hope a lot of these Pandas are the younger end and know no better. :'(
Tina Hugh 4 years ago
I think we’ve mostly all got the same good moral values, but we have different perspectives. But calling people on the right Nazis is similar to Trump calling BLM protestors Antifa rioters. It’s not reasonable and if there’s one thing this country needs more of, it’s reason.
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Norma Luce 4 years ago
This is the entrance to a WWI concentration camp in case anyone is wondering.I
Jonathan Armstrong 4 years ago
Ok, this comment section seems to have been hit by multiple serial killers. Lots of murder with words here. Anyway, I cam here to ask what the top building is. I may just be stupid or not really thinking about it.
Ruth Mayfly 4 years ago
Apart from this, some of the new and very much for-profit giant blocks of flats are just as depressing as those....socialist/communist?....ones.
Bacony Cakes 4 years ago
Bare concrete buildings are just ugly in general.
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#31
They Did Not See This Coming
Mike Ward 4 years ago
You should have kept going, it's full of gory plot twists that the film Saw would be proud of. If you ever feel you haven't encountered enough blood lust and depravity, open a bible up to the part where David gave Saul 100 Philistine foreskins in exchange for Saul's daughter, pure horror.
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Sasy 4 years ago
Every Atheist I know has read multiple works of many religions, they want to know everything.
Ruth Mayfly 4 years ago
I tried to read the bible, but I got stuck on a bit of the old testament which was catagorizing different types of spots as clean or unclean (clearly an early way of passing on knowledge about communicable vs non-communicable diseases, but damn was it dull to read) I've never got through other religious works either. I think I just don't consider them special enough. To me it's just some dude/dudes from long ago talking, it's kind of interesting to get inside their mindset a bit but also there's nothing to elevate their viewpoint above any of the other people who existed then or who exist now.
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Navy Blue Bandana 4 years ago
Ok I am Christian, and I certainly wouldn't mock your religion (or lack thereof) online, so it would be great if you didn't mock mine!
Luther von Wolfen 4 years ago
As Christians, we should expect and accept mockery (cf. John 15:18). It does no good to argue with atheists (Matthew 7:6). We should instead love them (Luke 6:32).
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Katie Lutesinger 4 years ago
Reading the bible is precisely why I'm an atheist. I read it quite thoroughly and the god depicted in it simply did not appeal to me. And I really didn't like all the horrible cruelty said god apparently approved of.
Israel Martinez 4 years ago (edited)
As an atheist, I agree with this ... one cannot argue any concept without actually knowing as much as one can about the subject ... Neil Degrasse Tyson has said as much (he included the Bible in his list of required reading books) ...
The Cute Cat 4 years ago
Many open minded person read all holy books.. I have done the koran and bible.. It is always better to understand more..
Sarah 4 years ago
I'm a Christian. Most of us don't make fun other religions. Please learn to be respectful of other people and what they believe. This world is already ruined enough with racism, and the pandemic. We need to come together, not make fun of people for what they believe. It's okay to have your opinions, just be respectful of how you share them. Thank you.
Virgil Blue 4 years ago
I know lots of other Christian's that live to make fun and denigrate people, so that's not saying much, but I'm glad you are at least not one of them.
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Kika González 4 years ago
The bible is not fantasy. There is proven history, and parables. It is not identified as fact from cover to cover, neither its it complete fiction, or fantasy as the word you used
Terd Fergison 4 years ago
There is a story with a talking donkey in it. God spoke some magic words while creating the universe. God created Adam out of mud, dirt, or clay. There are witches, wizards, warlocks, angels, demons, souls, zombies, giants, dragons, etc. Are any of those things real? No. Pure fantasy.
Load More Replies... Harleen 4 years ago
Could we not mock other people's religions? That's not clever. It's Creedism.
Terd Fergison 4 years ago
Respect is earned, not given. The god of the bible is super evil. In Egypt he supposedly murdered 1st born sons (some must have toddlers and infants). He supposedly flooded a world killing every puppy and kitten on earth via torturous drowning. This is a hugely malevolent, evil god. He doesn't deserve any respect. He's a fictional character that deserves scorn and ridicule. There was a time when christianity ruled the world, and it was called the dark ages for a f-u-c-king reason! When christians ruled the world, they tortured and killed people just for saying the sun is the center of our planetary system. When you guys ruled the world, it was by the sword and by murder. Now you have the guts to complain if someone speaks the truth or has a valid criticism? F-u-c-k off!
Load More Replies... Harløw-Banditø 4 years ago (edited)
No offense to any Christians but we just think that the idea of a sky daddy is kinda ridiculous. I’ll believe it when I see it with my own eyes. I need evidence. This is just how I function. Again I do hope that any Christians reading this are not offended
#32
Columbus Day
Truth Monster 4 years ago
End up in a random aisle and whatever you find there is now "Indian Food."
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
Looking for spices AND killing whoever does not imediately gives you something which does not exist in their country after you waved a sword in front of them while yelling in a language they do not understand.
Alex Barnett 4 years ago
Don't forget to grab some syphilis and bring it home with you.
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Aleksandra Elias 4 years ago
I would go to a beach and claim it in the name of the King of Spain
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
IDK why we even celebrate that genocidal maniac. It's not like he actually discovered America. If he had, this would be the United States of Columbia. (Not to be confused with Colombia.)
Agnes Jekyll 4 years ago
yes!! the Vikings were in North America long before him, and they also think that Egyptians visited Mexico (I know!!!)--they just didn't rape, kill, pillage and disease.
Load More Replies... Celtic Pirate Queen 4 years ago
OUCH! Bring an unknown disease to a people who've had no time to create an immunity?
#33
Austin Powers Would Be Proud Of That Comeback
Martha Meyer 4 years ago
Are they really all fat or did they just pick the four grossly overweight coaches the league had?
Lydia Shen 4 years ago
But...This is kinda unfair, I mean they only chose fat American coaches tho (This'll probably get downvoted but whatever?
plush n puppet shenanigans 4 years ago
i probably should be offended but i hate both gridiron (american) football and association football (soccer)
Alex Hamilton 4 years ago
A marvellous advertisement for US nutrition and dietary examples for sportspersons
Id row 4 years ago
How do you be a coach when you're *that* obese? How do you even stand and move around for an entire game?
Meyer Weinstock 4 years ago (edited)
Coaches don't move much, actually. They are mostly showpieces on the field (well, you can't miss them) and politicians off the field. Fat cats bring the pork, we say in American politics. Note that most winning American football coaches were never award-winning players, just good functionaries. Soccer (football everywhere else) takes the better players into coaching, and, although I may be mistaken, do they not have to work out with the team, too? American football is about short-burst action with power, not long-term running with skill. Also, look at American soccer coaches here: they resemble their European and Latin American counterparts, not their fellow Americans looking at a touchdown. -from the son of a college quarterback, and former college professor who refused to pass the jocks unless they worked for it
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#34
'im Tired Of Being Responsible For Something That Is Entirely My Resposibility.'
Kiki Starflyer 4 years ago (edited)
Children always come with a little joy and a little pain, I’m thankful my parents decided to bring my life into this world, I love them with all my heart.
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
If you think four months is a long time to care for children, please don't have children.
Neva Nevičica 4 years ago
I have a bad news for that guy: they will be the only ones responsible for much much more than 4 months.
Sasha Kuleshov 4 years ago
4 months, dude, you're not gonna stand caring for them until they're 18 yo XD
#35
I Love Puns
Losferatu 4 years ago
Let's play a game: Spell the type of establishment we're eating at, and I'll buy you your meal!
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
Your duties are what you and your partner freely consent to. Relationships are truly a "figure out your own rules scenario," and not impose them on others. When I say figure it out, I mean have a calm and honest discussion. Some couples want one to be responsible for particular bills, and others don't define their roles that way... there is nothing wrong with EITHER of those, as long as you are both consenting.
cursed--alien 4 years ago
Mate, we both have shitty jobs so we should split the bill because, like, nobody makes enough money to pay for both our meals
Panda Mona 4 years ago
You know why it is a "raustarant" ...? "Raus" in German means "get the f*** out of here" :-) and for me it would be the right moment to say that, when the other is starting with "repeat after me". ... :-)
Elizabeth Molloy 4 years ago
Soo, if he HAS to pay, does that mean you HAVE to sleep with him? You can't have it both ways.
#36
Who’ll Email You When You Block Him
4 years ago
Women, don't marry A creep who emails you after you blocked them. there's a f*****g reason you blocked them. don't be stupid.
cursed--alien 4 years ago
I don't think I'd want to be with someone who tried to contact me after I blocked them.
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
This is a dangerous message to send to both men AND women, it attempts (though does not succeed) to invalidate the action of blocking. We live in a digital world, blocking should be respected, with no exceptions. No one should ever use it as, or see it as, a prompt for further attempts.
Katherine Boag 4 years ago
I deffo don't want to be anywhere near someone that tries to circumvent it when i block them
#37
Can't Get Any More Clever Than This
Kirsten Kerkhof 4 years ago
I will never have the guts to send a reply like that, but by Golly, I wish I would ...
Pan Narrans 4 years ago
I told my new boss in our first meeting that he communicates like a six year old. His last email was four sentences which all started with 'I want'. Told him my seven year old already knew better. I still work there, and he isn't my boss anymore.
Hugh Cookson 4 years ago
I sent a very similar letter (pre internet days) to the owner of a company I worked for following an annual 'appraisal' - he was an entitled idiot, clueless as to how the company worked and was hated, no, loathed, by all of the people who worked for him - took him to a tribunal for his comments in my appraisal and ended up £20k better off ; the f****r finally went bust and I was happy. Took over that company 3 years later and ran it for 7 years, never lost a member of staff .........
Sami 4 years ago
This response leaves me little doubt as to why they may have been fired in the first place...but yes a boss should terminate you face to face.
#38
Invasive Species
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
"It has no natural predators" implies it will multiply out of control, like an invasive pest.
Janet Miller 4 years ago
Did it ever return? No, it never returned, and its fate is still unlearned.
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Panda Mona 4 years ago
I just googled "Roomba", because I thought it was one of the 50% of wild species I still don´t know by name ...
#39
Don’t Boast About Your Iq Test
Vic 4 years ago
Did you take the test Dory? I sure you'll excel, you fantastic fish!
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Ekaterina Sidyakova 4 years ago
Mensa Norway IQ test is not for animals but for humans, if you google it. Maybe the Norwegian test is for animals, but the responder here is actually showing his lack of knowledge rather than the person asking the question.
Just_A_Pansexual_Gal 4 years ago
Should I be scared? I took three different IQ tests, not the Norwegian one though, and got 139, 143, and 142? And I'm ten?
T.Milly 4 years ago
He just wants attention. He's asking social media to congratulate him on his high intelligence when, in reality, he's probably never even set eyes on a real MENSA test. If he is actually as intelligent as he purports to be, he wouldn't need to ask if he's intelligent in the first place.
fuggnuggins 4 years ago
Really doesn't make sense. For one, different tests give different results. Secondly, you don't know until you find out. And, these tests assess aptitude, not knowledge. Kid is probably gloating and, but your response actually sounds like you're jealous. And it's common. Here's the post, read the replies: https://www.quora.com/I-recently-took-the-Mensa-Norway-IQ-test-and-scored-a-143-I-m-14-years-old-does-this-mean-I-m-a-genius?share=1 And also, here's the MENSA page - if you can glean any information from this about what their scores mean then maybe you're not simply smart but closer to omniscient. https://test.mensa.no/ Especially that it -explicitly states- that it shouldn't be used to give such indication. Now, a 14 year old kid scoring just outside of what on a suitable test is definitively considered genius gets excited about their score - is that surprising? Jealousy of intelligence... you'd think a few more might offer encouragement, and many fewer attempts to sabotage...
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Lily Mae Kitty 4 years ago
But that's not true! MENSA doesn't have tests for animals! It's for humans only. Kid has a high IQ, bordering on genius.
Quazmodic 4 years ago
Ironically, the inability to simply Google "How intelligent is someone with an I.Q of 143?" indicates a low I'Q.
fuggnuggins 4 years ago
Is that the test that you used to confirm your genius?
Load More Replies... #40
Oof! British People Be Like...
Phil Potts 4 years ago
Americans are the only ones who refer to us as British. I identify as English.
ADHORTATOR 4 years ago
I am French and I refer to you as rosbif........ just kidding :-)
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Ruth Mayfly 4 years ago
I wish people would stop with the 'Bri ish' jokes. That's just one accent out of dozens.
KMill 4 years ago
What’s the matter, don’t like being made fun of? (We don’t either)
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Robert Miller 4 years ago
Sad part is ; considering how little history and critical thinking are valued in America , most Americans won't get this joke .
Caroline Overill 4 years ago
Actually Americans don't pronounce ts either. It took me years to realise they meant pedal to the metal and not pedal to the medal. Also they tend to "up the anny" rather than up the ante. And who didn't watch Twenny Four. Up in the north of England the word butty or but meant friend, I'm not sure if it still does. When they went to America in the dim and distant past it became buddy and bud. So while I don't say Bri'ish as many do, neither do I say Bridish.
#41
Honesty Is The Best Policy
Sasha Kuleshov 4 years ago
80% of hate comments on Twitter would not be said in person because #Cowards XD
#42
I Mean, He's Not Wrong ..
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago (edited)
In the US your ZIP code defines your chances in life. Living in the wrong ZIP code will deprive you of human rights. You won't be able to take out a loan or mortgage, won't have access to education, are destined for low paying job and criminalization by the police force. Living in the wrong ZIP code also means that councils allow polluting industries to build their factories close to your place of living. As a result living in the wrong ZIP code makes your lifespan shorter.
Luther von Wolfen 4 years ago
There's no discrimination against zip codes - there is discrimination against people who live in certain zip codes. A lot of that is discrimination against POC, but poor whites, in Appalachia for example, also suffer from regional discrimination.
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#43
Depends On Who Writes The Comic
Paul K. Johnson 4 years ago
I'll bet he has a spray can of Thor Repellent.
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Mike Ward 4 years ago
Batman would win, he has a plan to defeat all the Justice League members if they ever get out of control, and he even set up the Justice League to defeat him if he ever loses control. Batman can defeat Superman, a shakespearean actor with a batton wouldn't stand a chance.
Tanish D'Silva 4 years ago
Honestly the Batman from the comics could wipe out the entire MCU at the same time and still and barely bat (Hehe) an eye, But I think this is a comparison of the characters from the movies
Load More Replies... I'manoob! 4 years ago
I'd say Batman would win. He knows 127 styles of martial arts, he is good at problem solving, and he pretty much has no one to lose other than alfred.
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
The winner is the hammer. No one but Thor can use it, so Batman can't use it, but if Thor is doing something unworthy, he can't use it. The hammer comes out on top.
Lauren Caswell 4 years ago
Thors sister Hella used to wield the hammer tho
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#44
Boomer vs. Millenial
Just_A_Pansexual_Gal 4 years ago
plus the mad face in the top three for 315
Load More Replies... Sasha Kuleshov 4 years ago
"But in my time we didn't called that Racism it was just Segregation" :I
Luisa Vasconcelos 4 years ago
Was not the green generation raising the yellow generation to be this way ?
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
Every generation always blames the next, not taking any responsibility for any part of what they have done that may have transferred over. We are ALL responsible. We are responsible to become good people, and we are responsible for raising people to be good people.
panda123 4 years ago
People are individuals who can make their own choices, not just representatives of their generation. The millenial's response is just an example of whataboutery.
H Edwards 4 years ago
There's whataboutery, and there's pointing out hypocrisy.
Load More Replies... Tina Hugh 4 years ago (edited)
Boomers fought in the Vietnam War and started the civil rights movement and some Boomers are black. Do they not count? Are (white) anti-war extremists and white bigots really the only people whose existence we want to recognize?
Lorraine R 4 years ago
Boomers also started what was then known as the "Ecology" movement, prompting the founding of the Environmental Protection Agency and endangered species protection. And if boomers had an anthem, it would be the Beatles' "All You Need is Love."
Load More Replies... CatWoman312 4 years ago
Boomers love saying this kind of s**t all while typing it on a millennials invention
#45
It’s Funny Because It’s True
Pamela24 4 years ago
Also, diamonds are mostly cruelly-sourced overrated shiny stones. Artificial ones look just as good, harm basically no one when produced and cost a fraction.
I'manoob! 4 years ago
Same goes with gold. I get the gist that it was used as money back then to buy things. Although, as we evolve, so has our source of money. Basically making gold just a piece of metal. Now, I'm not gonna lie, gold is a little more useful nowadays for things like circuit boards and I guess eating(the gold flakes in fancy foods). But what does a bank need it for? They're just there sitting and looking pretty. Tell me if I'm wrong.
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AlphaPuck 4 years ago
@Panda Mona No I did all that before we lived together. We have 1 bank account now like a normal marriage. And the only people who pay rent and not a mortgage are financially irresponsible people. We don't even have a mortgage anymore... own outright at 32 years old. So please lets hear some insults, but more than likely I have heard better chirps from dead birds.
Load More Replies... Wolfstar 4 years ago (edited)
Because I'd actually like to finish college, achieve my dream of joining a professional orchestra, have enough for rent, and not wear jewelry since it hinders my ability to play my instrument AND is hella expensive? If I had a diamond, I'd sell it to be able to pay for college, rent, and instrument repairs.
Wolfstar 4 years ago (edited)
@AlphaPuck, Yeah, I would rather spend money to learn something that I love (music) rather than spending money to learn something I hate (computer science, mathematics, etc.) You could spend money doing something you like, as well! Oh wait, it seems like you like being a troll on BP. Maybe you shouldn't do that after all...
Load More Replies... Kirsten Kerkhof 4 years ago
Because diamonds are actually not that rare, and good imitations exist. In my social world Swarovski is perfectly acceptable, so why splurge on a diamond (except perhaps in a wedding ring) if Swarovski will do?
H Edwards 4 years ago
There are many more beautiful stones than a diamond. Also cheaper and less ethically questionable. No contest really, wouldn't have a diamond for an engagement or wedding ring either.
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Faith Hurst-Bilinski 4 years ago
Do millennials think they are the first to have to do this? Do they think they are the first to live through an economic downturn? Do they think every person older to them is a baby boomer? Rhetorical.
#46
She Isn’t A Walking Womb
Lauren Caswell 4 years ago
F**k this molyneux d**k. He was banned from speaking here (new zealand) in 2018 I think, the brainless monstrous mosque shooter donated to his causes and his petition to be allowed to do his stupid speaking event in NZ. Then murdered the innocent souls in cold blood at one of our mosques. So that's the kind of person who supports this fuckwad. No thanks. (NB not meaning to mislead, I'm personally agnostic, but say "our mosques" just as I would say "our churches/synagogues/temples/etc". A kiwi is a kiwi. A person is a person.)
B 4 years ago
"I hope she thinks about having kids before it's too late"... er... Why do people need to have kids at all? Why is having kids imperative in a world of 8 billion people? How many people actually ask themselves WHY they're reproducing before doing so? Because it's what people do? Because their god told them to in a book? Shitty arguments, really. There's a brilliant thriller novel called 10:59 by N Baker that addresses this issue, and everyone needs to read it before just leaping blindly into parenthood. Seriously.
KLo86 4 years ago
Ugh I feel sick after reading that. It's so vile to talk about someone's body like that.
Melissa Powell 4 years ago
Why is this man concerned about Swift's eggs? Or any woman's eggs. None and I repeat none of his business.
Load More Replies... Agnes Jekyll 4 years ago
Uh, she "still looks so young"? She IS young f*****t--unlike you who looks like a ball sack left out in the rain.
TheWitchNaru 4 years ago (edited)
Why would he even comment like that? Ew. Stay the f**k away from women's bodies. Just because I have a vagina, doesn't mean I have to have children. Ugh. Just ugh.
BabaBizzle 4 years ago
Why is this fucktard concerned with Taylor Swifts reproductive system? Why does HE ‘hope’ she has kids really soon? Is he a pedo with a penchant for celebrity kids? Maybe she doesn’t want to be a mum? It’s her business what she does with her womb. I think this Molyneux moron just types inflammatory tweets for Twitter mentions.
#47
Weird Motives
wandile dludlu 4 years ago
I wonder if the so called "1st world" countries know that here in the 3rd world, we drive both and are required to pass your driving test using a stick shift
Marie 4 years ago
I'm in France, and pretty much everyone learns how to drive a stick shift and will pass the test on a stick shift car... it's a shame it's slowly changing. I'm also pretty sure it's the same in a large portion of Europe too.
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Jasmine De Fina 4 years ago
It literally just depends on how your parents raised you. Both my brother and I can write in cursive and drive a stick, because my mom taught us. (We're both under 18)
Philly Bob Squires 4 years ago
I passed my test in a stick and I still write in cursive. I'm in the USA... but I'm also 62.
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
As a Gen X with a Millennial daughter, I really don't understand the constant generational fighting. While there are little things that annoy each of us about the other, none of them have to do with our respective ages. I'm always proud of her. Sure, I raised her, but she took what I taught her, built on it, and ran with it in directions that amaze me.
Red Hair Blue Soul 4 years ago
I'm a Gen x American. I passed my driver's test using a stick shift and still use cursive. It's not all of us. Kinda like how not all of us voted for Trump
Luther von Wolfen 4 years ago
Do you find yourself reminding people that there is a generation between Boomers and Millennials? Sometimes I do. Other times I'm happy to be forgotten.
Load More Replies... #48
Especially Clever
Vikram Bedi 4 years ago
If everyone starts using the toilet marked “ me” then “ everyone else “ would be left clean...
#49
Facebook Comeback
Helen Haley 4 years ago
The waiter is providing a valuable service with very little likelihood of customer death.
AlphaPuck 4 years ago
Maybe kids should do ride alongs to see what its actually like. We should do this with a lot of professions.
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B 4 years ago
It'd be interesting to see how well society fares without law enforcement. How soon would anarchy rule? How soon before people who bitch about the police started wishing they were around again? Not meaning to sound controversial, just wondering is all.
Sigmand Froid 4 years ago
That will never happen. Police are necessary. Some of them just need to do their freaking job and stop being entitled killers. We need them but they should not be above the law and stop killing mostly black people.
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Sasha Kuleshov 4 years ago
I will body-slam an oppressor in a heartbeat, then go to a local café after the march, have a nice latte and leave a 20% tip because f*ck the police >:D
Anna Lessens 3 years ago
You can't exactly serve dressed like your reenacting Tiananmen square
#50
Quite Funny To Be Honest
Katchen 4 years ago
WTAF. They ask teens about guns when school shootings plague the country, but are offended by the nail gun joke?
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
As a carpenter's kid, this is probably 100% true (at what point did he advocate taking up arms?) so shows Bible knowledge.
M O'Connell 4 years ago
I was going to say either that, or a flare gun, due to his connection with commercial fishing.
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chuck.dont.surf 4 years ago
What's sad is these a-holes actually believe Jesus would carry a gun.
Marky Mark 4 years ago
Yup. But it would be an American gun like the M4A, and not some foreign gun like the AK47.
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Ruth Mayfly 4 years ago
Until I scrolled down, I thought the first question was the joke. How is it not? Also, I think 'nail gun' is the only answer at all likely to be right. At least a nail gun isn't made just for killing.
Marco Conti 4 years ago
He was anti nailguin for sure, but mostly anti-spear. The NRA was called National Stabby Sticks Association. Prove me wrong.
Load More Replies... CatWoman312 4 years ago (edited)
I hate to disappoint you, but I’m about 99% sure that not only would Jesus not own a gun he would advocate against the 2nd amendment. Jesus was a liberal. If you’d actually read the Bible you would learn that.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
As a member of the catholic minority, I hereby declare that this joke is not offensive. Ego vos absolvo.
#51
Rip To This Antivaxxer
Zenozenobee 4 years ago
When I was about 10, my aunt's brother got a car crash. He was the only one who survived. He was ejected from the car because he dadn't his seatbelt. The 3 others died, they had they seatbelt on. Not a single membrer of our family stopped using their seatbelt after that....
Adrienne Early 4 years ago
My father-in-law has gotten shingles 3x, the first time he almost went blind. Each time laid him out for a couple months. If you get through it with no issues you are a lucky duck.
serge 4 years ago
Chickenpox scars become skin cancer 30 years on....I guess she will beg to differ....picture from the internet 4_PAY-h_MD...166b4c.jpg 
Noel Bovae 4 years ago
My husband (38) just had Shingles, and it was miserable! It can, and often does, leave permanent nerve damage. They should research the death rate of pregnant mother's, and newborns that get chickenpox. It's crazy! Antivaxxers like this, make me FURIOUS. Their ignorance (and arrogance) boggles the mind. The internet should be making us all smarter, but I'm afraid it's actually doing the opposite.
#52
That's A No Brainer
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
Yes, not even Floridians... they keep killing and maiming themselves in more outlandish ways.
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#53
Forgot To Add That As A Poll Option
Lily Lu 4 years ago
They were not arrested, they got displined by their hospital and threatened with being fired. Not cool, but not the same as being arrested.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
The eight whistleblowers were arrested for “spreading rumours”. https://thepostmillennial.com/whistleblowers-in-china-arrested-for-warning-about-coronavirus-last-month/ or https://www.the-sun.com/news/335547/chinese-whistleblowers-who-warned-of-coronavirus-outbreak-at-meat-market-were-arrested-for-spreading-rumours/ or https://www.businessinsider.com/china-coronavirus-whistleblowers-speak-out-vanish-2020-2?international=true&r=US&IR=T
Load More Replies... #54
Tomi, Absolutely Destroyed.
CatWoman312 4 years ago
For her it definitely is a face diaper as only s**t seems to come out of her mouth
#55
Bryan Is Probably Still A Virgin To This Day
Lord Mysticlaw 4 years ago
"You mean you actually invited me over to watch a movie? I can do that on my own at my own house, thanks."
Michał Jastrzębski 4 years ago
and in other news, "why men only want sex? we want dates, movies, etc" :V
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#56
Have Fun With Your New Profession.
TheWitchNaru 4 years ago
Women putting up with abusive & shitty men because they're afraid to be single & alone because some asshole in thier life told them that women are nothing without a man...
Load More Replies... Zenozenobee 4 years ago
I never understood that kind of non sense. Your bf is cheating, and the side girl is the bit**? The side girl may be aware of the situation and that's bad, but even if....Who the hell was supposed to be loyal to you and just went planting his seeds around?
TheDemonUnderYourBed 4 years ago (edited)
Wait- she knew he had a side hoe, but only questions whether or not to stay once he gets the chick pregnant?? Ah, I see.. Babygirl- LEAVE THE DUDE ALREADY!
#57
Yeah, Who Cares About White Supremacy, Amirite?
Wolfstar 4 years ago
When's the last time white supremacists said or did racist sh*t? Hmm, let me see...Oh, last week. A black man was shot entering his own home. Are you sure you're not high on crack?
Load More Replies... #58
Come On Judge
Dave P 4 years ago
Because she was a Judge in New York State for many years, won many awards as a judge, then became a prosecutor in NY with the third best conviction record in the state at the time as well as went after Pedos and Rapists with a vengeance. Tried to run for Senate and lost to Clinton in 2006 so she became a TV judge relying on her history as a real judge
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#59
Honestly Wish I Had This Comeback With Half The Idiots Ive Been With.
Pamela24 4 years ago
If he's not willing to have a condom on, he's not worth to have sex with. Simple as that. It means he values your health way less than his potential pleasure. In a committed relationship where you agree on a different contraceptive (if you don't wish to get pregnant) and get tested for STIs beforehand, sure. But never with a casual sex partner.
Luther von Wolfen 4 years ago
Get to know people before you have sex with them. How hard is that?
#60
Task Failed Successfully
Omag 4 years ago
Same here but its written in a more subtle way "production date"
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Astrid Nineor 4 years ago
Sounds good to me. Mutton is sent from Australia and New Zealand to the UK, and fish from Norway is sent to Africa, so a kill date would be ideal.
Elizabeth Wilkins 4 years ago
My cows that I raised to eat and my chickens I also raised to eat have a killed on date too.
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Grew up on a farm. We froze things with the kill-process date on the container.
Katie Lutesinger 4 years ago
RIP Elias P. Chicken 2nd June 2020 - 6th July 2020 ...now I feel bad. :(
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
90% of meat products would have a date range, e.g. sausage containing meat from animals killed over weeks, and/or months ago, as it's stored frozen and transported first. UK sheep from NZ, US beef from Brazil.
#62
Hideous Little Goatee
Martha Meyer 4 years ago
I think celebrities in general need to stay away from reading comments about themselves on the internet, not just the teenagers among them. Can't be ehalthy for anyone to read all the nasty commenst there will be.
#63
Yeah We Smart Bro
Luisa Vasconcelos 4 years ago
Africa is a continent with 52 countries. Why are you speaking of Africa like is a country? Your Africa is not my Africa and your Angola is not my Angola. I'm also from Angola.
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#64
Should Have Seen That Coming Eleanor
Martha Meyer 4 years ago
The "Ok, boomer" thing just needs to die. When will people see that this generational war is serving no one?
Luther von Wolfen 4 years ago
As the voice of Gen X, we're fine with the Boomer v. Millennial war. Fight on.
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pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
I don't feel "millennials are killing x" OR "ok boomer" are good things, both are bad. Both are stereotyping a generation, and excluding the exceptions. I understand if you feel someone is putting you in a box- but there are other ways to stand up for yourself, than putting them in a box. It will not help them understand how you feel, nor will it stop them, you're just sinking to their level.
Just JoLynn 4 years ago
I'm fine with the "millennials are killing..." comments/articles because whatever is being killed is usually a good thing. Oh no, we're buying less diamonds, paper products, single use plastics, what horrible people would do such a thing!?!
Load More Replies... Alex Hamilton 4 years ago
Why bring Jews into this?, I may be Jewish so I may be stupid, so please explain.
Stephanie Did It 4 years ago
Baby Boomers are called that because after WW2, there was a 'boom' of babies being born after all the soldiers came home. In no way is it an insult or anything negative. It has somehow become fashionable to denigrate everyone and everything possible.
#65
Profit Before Health?
Truth Monster 4 years ago
No Expense was Spared on Covid supplies. We might, however, have not paid the programmer...
Astrid Nineor 4 years ago
Norway made an "emergency football team" to travel to a badly affected country and play football (soccer).... They PRAIED them for their valiant effort... Can we send the decision makers to the park please?
#66
James Ain’t Holding None Back
Lauren Caswell 4 years ago
I love these guys and their inability to notice, in their search for rare Pokemon to steal, they that have a friggin talking Pokemon that can translate to English. Like the only one I'm aware of. Ah well, still loved that show when it came out
Christian Bradshaw 4 years ago
Same here. I don't really like like the new episodes
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A Random Panda 4 years ago
And Musashi! Oooh, nice to see somebody who watches the Japanese.
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#67
Best Way To Respond To A Hater
La Petite Morte 4 years ago (edited)
The best part was what she replied with *after* he panicked. It was something along the lines of 'We're sorry, your response cannot be validated as correct. Proof of published threat to life and property has been verified. You will be notified as to when you will have an opportunity to defend your actions and words. Case pending. Have a nice day.'
Mike Pence's Fly 4 years ago
I think this is the same lady as that Mano guy in a post a while back.
Tobias the Tiger 4 years ago
Agreed. Seems a lot more effective than just telling them to stop.
Load More Replies... #68
That's Not How It Works Karen
cybermerlin2000 4 years ago
Well... There's the Rotavirus vaccine, taken orally. Just like the polio one.
sylvantic 4 years ago
actually, there are two polio vaccines, Salk and Sabin. Salk is the one used in the US. It is injected. the sabin is oral and cheaper, but has some rare side effects. it is used in immunazation campaigns. Salk vaccines are expensive and harder to give to large amounts of people, but safer.
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Alexandru Bucur 4 years ago
But... you can absolutely drink an injectable vaccine and it won't kill you. It won't work, because it needs to be in your bloodstream and not in your gastrointestinal tract, but...
Mere Cat 4 years ago
Yes! Not sure about the taste but if you can safely inject something into your body, you can also eat/drink it safely.
Load More Replies... #69
Can Somebody Cashapp Me A Dang Pizza?
#70
Right Back In His Face
Hugh Cookson 4 years ago
The sooner you Americans wake up to the fact that you have and are still being fleeced / robbed by the very system that is supposed to help you when you and your families are in need of healthcare through no fault of your own, the better. There is no other country in the World - mostly - that would stand idly by and let some of it's most vulnerable and sickest citizens suffer and die because they don't have the correct 'insurance'. Not only is it cruel but also uncaring and downright sadistic...... Glad I live in a half way decent country ....
Clever Dog 4 years ago
I really dont understand why Americans put up with your crazy healthcare system. Its tragic.
NaruTheCollective 4 years ago
I mean....American health insurance is f*****g bullshit anyway so like, maybe the cancer patient did spend all of they're money? It's possible.
Alex Hamilton 4 years ago
As a Brit. even despite our apology for a Justice system, bent coppers and lawyers et al, I can never praise our NHS health care service to highly. Every day i count my blessings and those of others who have benefited from this remarkable construction. Long may it continue, and thanks again to all concerned with it.
Load More Replies... #71
Stupid Millennials
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
But the old guy is right. There are totally superfluous warnings on anything you buy these day. Can of paint: "Not for internal use" Barbeque: "Not for use indoors" Chainsaw:" Keep away from children."
M O'Connell 4 years ago
A lot of it has to do with cultural expectations of knowledge. Appliances used to be fairly deadly! You invested in them, trained in their operation and maintained a high degree of situational awareness while you were around them. Once people began to grow up around electrical appliances, they didn't read the training manuals, and didn't understand the seriousness of the safety practices they needed to observe. People don't read. Warning labels absolve manufacturers of people's stupidity by putting the warning right. there.
Adrienne Early 4 years ago
But really though, those labels are to defend the company. Like the MCDonald "hot" cup. It's not to warn you that it's hot, it's so you can't sue when you get 3rd degree burns from the molten hot coffee.
#72
Oof Size Large
Christian Bradshaw 4 years ago
True. It was more of a burn to her parents
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cassiushumanmother 4 years ago
I thought that weirdly spelling English or American names was just a "not english speaker" thing. I'm french and i've encountered "Tressy", "Jenifer" ( told jenifair), "Djason", "Rayane" (Ryan)... and "Kévin" is the winner because it's like a meme in France, Kévin is like the archetype of the uneducated french white trash. American names are like a brand for the french white trash, a stamp of authenticity, like french names for american restaurants that don't serve any french food, both think it's classy, but it's not.
#73
Praise Be To Sony
Aaron Dettmer 4 years ago
The word murder also doesn't appear in the Constitution. But it's still not right. Genocide too. Oh, and Holocaust
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
Where does the Constitution stand on wifi and nail polish? It's almost as if it's not a practical guide to life.
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Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago (edited)
The word abortion doesn’t appear in the bible either but it still doesn’t stop the religious folk.
Random Person 4 years ago
However, it does state that unborn people are people too and you shouldn't kill people. "The word of the Lord came to me, saying "before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." (Jeremiah 1:4-5) and "you shall not murder." (Exodus 20:13). This is probably going to be downvoted, but people should at least be informed of "the religious folk's" opinions and the reasoning behind them.
Load More Replies... Vikram Bedi 4 years ago (edited)
The constitution doesn’t include condoms , vasectomy, plan b etc etc either... 😂
Zachariah M. Baird 4 years ago
But nobody is saying videogames are a right, or that they should be free.
cybermerlin2000 4 years ago
The constitution is badly out of date and needs to be re-evaluated and updated
Eva Bryson 4 years ago
And you think you could come up with something better that could stand the test of time?
Load More Replies... Damon Gates 4 years ago
Lots of things in modern society aren't mentioned in the Constitution. That's why we have a federal judiciary to determine how the Constitution applied in new situations.
Ruth Mayfly 4 years ago
The Constitution doesn't mention computers or mobile phones either. Better ban them all, eh?
#74
I See A Sad Pig Too
#75
Greta On Fire
LittleMissLotus 4 years ago
Okay somebody explain this to me... Wasn't this guy the dipshit who was telling her to "chill" a few years ago??
Wolfstar 4 years ago
Yep. Then she changed her profile to “A teenager working on her anger management problem. Currently chilling and watching a good old-fashioned movie with a friend.” You gotta love Greta.
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#76
God Damn I Know That Hurt
pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
Being attractive does not keep you from being intelligent or having a good personality. Neither does being unattractive. What is attractive and unattractive is also highly in flux.
#77
"Millenials Are Killing The Big House Market"
A.M. Pierre 4 years ago
I'm sorry, but someone whose biggest problem is "Woe is me, I can't sell my mansion" doesn't garner a lot of my sympathy.
TheWitchNaru 4 years ago
Because $8 an hour isn't a living wage & going into life long debt via student loans ..... You are so right. I should stop bitching about getting paid so little & borrow thousands of dollars from a bank to get a degree to get a job that'll pay $13 an hour instead!
Hugh Cookson 4 years ago
Alternatively, stay put, shut up and enjoy living in your big house ; if you bought it as an 'investment' I have no sympathy. If, when you do finally sell it for whatever reason, and you lose money no tears will be shed by me and many, many others ........
#78
Nudes For Dudes
chi-wei shen 4 years ago
First question: Why would a decent person go through his/her spouse's phone?
Ana Vaquer Perez 4 years ago
I agree foxxy but maybe they meant if they were just casually scrolling through their camera roll, perhaps looking for a photo of them together?
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pusheen buttercup 4 years ago
It's different for everyone. I have all kinds of nudes and so does he, for us looking at nudes of others doesn't mean we're cheating. He also watches porn and so do I.
#79
Dread It. Run From It.
Vikram Bedi 4 years ago
Today’s movie villains are concerned about the environment/over population ...Like the James Bond villain trying to secure an underground water reservoir to sell in the future...that’s just sad... trying to show environmentalists have some hidden agenda to take over the world.
M O'Connell 4 years ago
The agenda isn't hidden. Villains always care about the money. Environmentalists care about the resources themselves, and their continued availability to everyone.
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#80
I Can’t Remember
#81
Found The Reason Why
Martha Meyer 4 years ago
This was always odd to me when I saw it in films, because people were living in houses. If I tried leave through my bedroom window, I would have fallen to death from my apartment building.
Hugh Cookson 4 years ago
Um, no ; the Plague (in it's various forms and timescales) was caused by a parasite in fleas carried by rats which primarily arrived in coastal towns from trading ships, then the plague was spread by people moving from town / village to other towns / villages ; having a screen anywhere (had they existed) would be as useless as as a chocolate teapot .....
Astrid Nineor 4 years ago (edited)
Uhm, pretty sure no one had windows (with glass) nor netting / mesh whatever at that time. Also, fleas probably find their way in anyway
DogMatic 4 years ago
Glass is very old stuff. Medieval stained glass is incredible.
Load More Replies... Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago (edited)
I live in a house with screens missing from half the windows and it annoys the f**k out of me. Especially because it is the windows that I would love to have open but can’t.
Lord Mysticlaw 4 years ago
Everything about this is funny 🤣 But also, meanwhile here in SA we're wondering why you guys don't have burglar bars on your windows. Like wtf dudes.
#83
Yeah Let’s Keep Doing That.
#84
Someone Has Been Stealing A Few Eggplants, Huh?
Jonathan MacFarlane 2 years ago
I feel like we probably shouldn't be rooting for Walmart but yeah.
#85
Money Beats Brawn
Capelli rosa e patate 4 years ago
I don’t know who either of them are but that made me giggle something awful. 😂
Stimpy 4 years ago
I don't get it. Was his "comeback" really just that he was a spoiled rich brat?
Wolfstar 4 years ago
The two are very good friends. They were poking fun at each other.
Load More Replies... Pamela24 4 years ago
This seems like friendly banter. :) I don't like to do that either in my personal life but I really don't think this was supposed to be hurting.
Load More Replies... #86
Y = Mx + B For ?
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
No, it says how many friends you can take and give a round. The rest you leech off them. See, math is useless, mooching is the way.
#87
C- C- Cons- Consent?
Foxxy (The Original) 4 years ago
Don’t come to Aus then, the C word is used countless times in a sentence.
Anne Reid 4 years ago
Considering the actual meaning of the word is “old friend,” I see no problem with that! But then again, I think it’s dumb that people get so offended by words. Not racial slurs, of course, just regular words. Poop is ok but not sh*t? Stupid.
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Candace Fitzpatrick 4 years ago
How about like, uh using the word like in every sentence you like, have to post. Maybe I’m alone in this, because I’m 42/old person but to me this word is awful when used that way.
Luther von Wolfen 4 years ago
Going to another country and complaining about the people there.....
banana 4 years ago
My mom grew up in Australia. She says (c word) is derogatory to women and terrible in America, but in Australia and Britain it has a different meaning. You call everyone a (c word) including men, like if they cut you off while driving or something. And sometimes you even call your friends (c word) playfully.
Hugh Cookson 4 years ago
I try to not say cucumber or calf or canary in every sentence but they do seem to sneak in sometimes - cunting C words everywhere; bastards. Oh BTW you can't say c**t in Canada (another 'C' word !!) - look up Kevin 'bloody' Wilson and have a laugh......
#88
Simply Ranting A Nation Because You Have A Typical Stock Image Of It In Your Head
Ruth Mayfly 4 years ago
I feel this is inaccurate. Identifying an outbreak of a known virus is different from identifying a new virus which can't be tested for. China certainly doesn't deserve any praise for silencing the first worried doctors, it does for the fast shutdown and for sharing information on the virus. But in the end I don't think this could have been contained by any country, there were far too many people without symptoms. Even with warning and tests available most countries failed to contain it.
#89
Gotta Get Home
Aaron Dettmer 4 years ago
Orgasm. It means orgasm. When a man "nuts", he's having an orgasm
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Luisa Vasconcelos 4 years ago
If you love her, why are you nutting with another woman ? Strange why to love.
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
True, but --- he's saying she's the "side-b*tch" to every one she's ever been with. He's not speaking about himself (as he's a stranger on twitter anyhows).
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Add New Image
What do you think ?
Ray Martin 4 years ago
These are all excellent, but the Roomba one made me nearly spit coffee.
Panda Mona 4 years ago
Yes, great burns! But I had to google "Roomba" because I thought this was one of the 50% of wild species I just do not know by name :-)
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Vicky Zar 4 years ago
I‘ve got a comeback story, but I am not sure if you can call it good. Could some jewish persons please tell me if it is insulting or something? Or maybe you even like it? God, I really don‘t know if I should post it, but I am curious about your reactions. I‘ve heared it only second hand. You have to know beforehand, that Germany has many imigrants. Especially from Turkey. And some of them do not really integrate in our society. If I remember correctly the president of Turkey even demanded that Germany should build Schools for the Turkish living here.... but I might have misunderstood that. Nevertheless, some Germans are a bit ... miffed about the Turkish here. Anyway, here is the story: In an underground train in Germany some Turkish teens come in and make a ruckus. An old german Lady asks them to be quiet or mind their manners or something. But they don‘t listen. Insted they tell her that the Turkish will take over Germany anyway. //part 1
Vicky Zar 4 years ago
//part 3: obviously this is not funny in regard of the jews part, but it is a „good“ comeback in that situation.... or isn‘t it? Please tell me what you think! I don‘t even know if this story is true or an urban legend.
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Catherine Spencer-Mills 4 years ago
"Coronavirus is a fraud! It's just the flu!" According to the CDC, last year there were less than 34,000 deaths from influenza. This year we are over 300,000 deaths. No matter what you call it, it isn't good.
Aliquid A 4 years ago
if 90% of the people reading BP either find this funny, or just roll their eyes and move on... it isn't polarizing... upsetting *you* isn't the definition of polarizing, when you clearly represent a fringe group.
Load More Replies... Ray Martin 4 years ago
These are all excellent, but the Roomba one made me nearly spit coffee.
Panda Mona 4 years ago
Yes, great burns! But I had to google "Roomba" because I thought this was one of the 50% of wild species I just do not know by name :-)
Load More Replies... Vicky Zar 4 years ago
I‘ve got a comeback story, but I am not sure if you can call it good. Could some jewish persons please tell me if it is insulting or something? Or maybe you even like it? God, I really don‘t know if I should post it, but I am curious about your reactions. I‘ve heared it only second hand. You have to know beforehand, that Germany has many imigrants. Especially from Turkey. And some of them do not really integrate in our society. If I remember correctly the president of Turkey even demanded that Germany should build Schools for the Turkish living here.... but I might have misunderstood that. Nevertheless, some Germans are a bit ... miffed about the Turkish here. Anyway, here is the story: In an underground train in Germany some Turkish teens come in and make a ruckus. An old german Lady asks them to be quiet or mind their manners or something. But they don‘t listen. Insted they tell her that the Turkish will take over Germany anyway. //part 1
Vicky Zar 4 years ago
//part 3: obviously this is not funny in regard of the jews part, but it is a „good“ comeback in that situation.... or isn‘t it? Please tell me what you think! I don‘t even know if this story is true or an urban legend.
Load More Replies... Catherine Spencer-Mills 4 years ago
"Coronavirus is a fraud! It's just the flu!" According to the CDC, last year there were less than 34,000 deaths from influenza. This year we are over 300,000 deaths. No matter what you call it, it isn't good.
Aliquid A 4 years ago
if 90% of the people reading BP either find this funny, or just roll their eyes and move on... it isn't polarizing... upsetting *you* isn't the definition of polarizing, when you clearly represent a fringe group.
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