The internet is awash with tales of the Bridezilla, that curious and fascinating phenomenon that can turn otherwise kind and rational brides-to-be into selfish and entitled beasts. However, this story, first posted on subreddit r/insanepeoplefacebook, got even more than the usual attention as it combines the bridezilla with another internet favorite: the militant vegan.
Image credits: Istockphoto/sergeyryzhov
The post sparked an intense debate, opening up interesting questions of tolerance, choice and etiquette at weddings. Of course, it is entirely up to the bride and groom how they choose to celebrate their wedding, and the guests that they invite. But wouldn’t this be a great chance to show the ‘murderers’ that an all-vegan wedding can be as beautiful and fulfilling as any other? Speaking to well-known wedding website Martha Stewart Weddings, Michelle Cehn, PETA member and founder of World of Vegan, explained how to successfully pull off a vegan wedding without alienating non-vegan guests.
“While it’s always important to consider your guests’ comfort when planning an event, most people understand that a wedding is the bride and groom’s special day,” Cehn said. “Most vegan couples see their wedding as a chance to wow their guests, many of whom may be unfamiliar with the wide variety of vegan fare. They want their family and friends to enjoy the great food and walk away saying, ‘That was delicious. I can’t believe it was all vegan!’”
Having had a successful vegan wedding herself, Cehn believes that one of the most important points is to give the guests a clear heads up of what to expect. “You can let guests know in advance that the food will be vegan or simply place ‘vegan’ labels by the food on the reception tables,” she suggests.
“Instead of wedding gifts, you can ask your guests to donate to animal-related charities, such as PETA or a farmed-animal sanctuary,” she advises. “Or you can donate a portion of the monetary wedding gifts to charities that you support. Another fun idea is to plan a trip to an animal sanctuary in lieu of a bachelor or bachelorette party.”
“Rather than giving traditional wedding favors, why not present your guests with a gift that will help save animals? For example, PETA offers wedding favor cards that you can place by table settings at your reception to let guests know that a donation has been made in their honor. Also, be sure to send guests home with a little treat, such as a gourmet vegan chocolate bar or a bag of heart-shaped seed paper confetti, which they can plant at home to grow wildflowers.”
Plenty of better ways that this misguided bride could’ve gone about it, although it is important to note that she is only 20 years old so her naivety can be slightly excused. Upon finding that even her fellow vegans were not supporting her harsh stance, she added a short update later on.
Apparently, she had invited the whole family but decided to un-invite them, including her mother because they decided they wanted a full-vegan wedding. And that included the guest-list. “Her family were happy to be vegan for the day or weekend,” one former guest wrote. “But that wasn’t good enough. Either they have a life-long commitment to being vegan or they ain’t s**t to her.”
As the discussion moved on we got further updates. “Not only are we no longer a bridesmaid, we are also toxic and bad people who she no longer wants in her life,” one former bridesmaid fumed. “She’s now making us out to be the biggest liars. Literally, none of her family have bullied her for being vegan, it’s all in her delusional head. All this because we refuse to make the vegan lifelong commitment.”
Of course, this is an extreme example and vegan weddings are becoming more and more common, there’s a good chance you’ll be invited to one yourself one day! Bored Panda spoke to Being Vegan, a fun and informative Facebook page that celebrates the vegan lifestyle, who believes that inclusivity is always for the best. “First of all, try not to refer to it as a ‘vegan’ wedding and focus on the union of the couple,” they said. “Plus, if the guests are friends and family and truly love and respect the couple they won’t care.”
“Of course, it’s better if everyone is invited. With a mentality of ‘vegans only,’ vital family members like grandparents and even parents might be excluded. Invite everyone! It’s not like your forcing everyone to become vegan against their will. Plus I’ve been to family weddings where my wife and I had to bring our own food because the caterers sucked! Haha but we still had a great time.”