Man Debates Breaking Up: “The Thin Girl I Was Attracted To Was Replaced By An Insatiable Blob”
Relationships ultimately require open and honest communication, but that’s easier said than done. After all, it can be hard to talk about someone’s faults and even harder to admit your own. For better or worse, telling the truth can make or break a relationship. But certain topics are often a lot more touchy than others.
A man wondered if he was wrong for wanting to leave his girlfriend after she started to gain weight and didn’t want to do anything about it. OP later shared an update about what happened and netizens discussed who was actually in the wrong here.
Being open and honest about your feelings is key to a relationship
Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto / pexels (not the actual photo)
But one man wanted advice from the internet when he wanted to leave his GF over her weight gain
Image credits: Masson-Simon / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: [deleted]
Everyone has the right to do what they want with their own body
Talking about weight is by no means an easy topic. Some folks chastised OP for not bringing it up earlier, but truth be told, it’s more complicated. First and foremost, he himself argues that it took him a while to notice. Weight gain takes time, by the time he realized that there was a problem, the “damage” so to speak, had been done.
It’s also not a topic that can be broached easily. Most people do, at a certain level, understand that we have bodily autonomy. If a person likes the weight they are at, there is nothing someone can really do to them. After all, we are free to handle our own bodies however we see fit. Indeed, if your partner starts to make requests of your body, you might want to leave them immediately.
However, OP’s opinions aside, it is perhaps best to break up if you no longer want to be with the other person. In this particular case, this couple doesn’t have kids to manage. They aren’t bound by something bigger to make the relationship work. In an ideal world, a couple would be a perfect match, but we don’t live in that sort of universe.
People and the things they want can and will change with time
After all, feelings can change. We as humans change all the time, indeed, it would be a tragedy if we didn’t. So it’s still important to recognize that sometimes what worked for you in the past will simply not be the case anymore. It’s worth adding that a relationship is about learning more about your partner.
Sometimes we make assumptions or have expectations that we talk ourselves into. Many couples fall into the trap of believing that their partner knows everything without communicating it. The result is both miscommunication and resentment when a person’s real behavior no longer matches their partner’s imagination.
So OP perhaps should have considered his own attitude. That being said, in a relatively uncommitted relationship, you shouldn’t be tied down by a person you no longer like. It’s best to break up and allow everyone to just move on. For those who are curious, OP shared a sizable update on the situation, which can be found below. At the very least, this story should serve as a reminder to be honest about everything with your partner and don’t assume they understand your expectations if you have never voiced them.
People shared their thoughts on OP’s situation
Later, OP shared a sizable update
Image credits: Zinkevych_D / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: seventyfourimages / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: [deleted]
Netizens gave their thoughts in the comments
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What made me think was her comment that she's rather die than go back to her mom and that she wanted to get married. Is it possible she saw him as her ticket out of a bad situation?
If she was disfigured after an accident, got a cancer, or other issue she wouldn't be able to have a controll over, I would say yes , he would be kind of an ah, even though I can understand people who can't take the pressure of a person who relies on them physically or/and emotionally. But in that case, I'm sorry he has the right to be happy in his couple, and if her gaining weight by choice is not something he can accept, he has the right to break up.. Nobody should feel trapped in a relationship , because for your partner to be happy you must be happy too. And if the SO doesn't want to work on what makes you unhappy, then you have the right to be selfish. At least there are no kids in the middle
My boyfriend also had the "weight talk" with me, and he was very right to be worried. I suddenly got a disability 6 years ago, and I was adapting to my new lifestyle. But: I hadn't adjusted my food intake yet, and was still eating like the more physically active person I used to be. ▪️▪️▪️The pounds were flying on and I didn't notice because I was focused on my leg function. Well, being too heavy is doubly bad for your body if you have a disability.▪️▪️▪️ My body has changed a lot, but my boyfriend still likes it. I've got a pretty muscular torso now, and lost a lot in the waist with IF. He prefers girls with a slim build, but this level of muscle is fine by him too. He says that I'm a good mix between sturdy and soft. And me being happy about my body does a lot for him too.
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U have a type and u want someone with similar interests. That's normal But u were horrible about it. "Blob". Really? Necessary?
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What made me think was her comment that she's rather die than go back to her mom and that she wanted to get married. Is it possible she saw him as her ticket out of a bad situation?
If she was disfigured after an accident, got a cancer, or other issue she wouldn't be able to have a controll over, I would say yes , he would be kind of an ah, even though I can understand people who can't take the pressure of a person who relies on them physically or/and emotionally. But in that case, I'm sorry he has the right to be happy in his couple, and if her gaining weight by choice is not something he can accept, he has the right to break up.. Nobody should feel trapped in a relationship , because for your partner to be happy you must be happy too. And if the SO doesn't want to work on what makes you unhappy, then you have the right to be selfish. At least there are no kids in the middle
My boyfriend also had the "weight talk" with me, and he was very right to be worried. I suddenly got a disability 6 years ago, and I was adapting to my new lifestyle. But: I hadn't adjusted my food intake yet, and was still eating like the more physically active person I used to be. ▪️▪️▪️The pounds were flying on and I didn't notice because I was focused on my leg function. Well, being too heavy is doubly bad for your body if you have a disability.▪️▪️▪️ My body has changed a lot, but my boyfriend still likes it. I've got a pretty muscular torso now, and lost a lot in the waist with IF. He prefers girls with a slim build, but this level of muscle is fine by him too. He says that I'm a good mix between sturdy and soft. And me being happy about my body does a lot for him too.
Load More Replies... U have a type and u want someone with similar interests. That's normal But u were horrible about it. "Blob". Really? Necessary?
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