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Man Perfectly Explains Women’s Rage Today Using Brutal Analogy So That All Men Can Finally Understand It
Author A.R. Moxon has recently invited all men to participate in an exercise of empathy. He reframed women’s experiences with violence and sexual assault and presented it in a way that most guys should comprehend… getting kicked in the nuts. At first, it sounds silly, but it doesn’t after you read the whole thing.
“Speaking on the societally-macro level, empathy has been largely a one-way street when it comes to gender roles and dynamics,” Moxon told Bored Panda. “In my experience, women are empathetic toward men, while men tend not to be particularly empathetic toward women.”
“Put another way, women have to think about what men are feeling as a matter of survival. Men aren’t in a similar situation, and so, if they don’t want to, they don’t. And, by and large, we don’t want to.”
“When women tell their stories of living with danger and vulnerability in abusive relationships and of survival from assault, our first instinct appears to be to protect ourselves from personal culpability and accountability; we certainly saw that dynamic play out as the Kavanaugh story developed.”
Moxon said that his analogy – like any other – is imperfect, and he has received a lot of feedback since he hit “send.” Positive and negative. “I chose nut-kicking because there isn’t a man alive that doesn’t understand exactly what a nut-shot is, and, with very few exceptions, none who would ever want it or seek it out or go out ‘asking’ for it,” he explained. “Most importantly, no man confuses getting kicked in the nuts with sex. It’s very clearly violence, even though it involves sex organs. The idea of growing up in a society where getting hoofed in the balls is normalized behavior, systematically if tacitly allowed by a complicit society, and frequently confused with a pleasurable activity like sex, would rightfully be horrifying to any guy.”
And he couldn’t have come up with it at a better time. As Judge Brett Kavanaugh has just been confirmed to the US Supreme Court, the world has been hit by a huge wave of anger and protest, highlighting the problems that surround sexual abuse, assault and other social issues around it.
“I can’t imagine women’s rage today,” Moxon wrote. “But this exercise, while abstract, helped me get nearer to it than I’d been.”
“The Kavanaugh confirmation proves once again that one of the primary drivers of our society right now is normalized abuse and enablement of abuse,” Moxon added. “In such a society, the telling of wrong is itself seen as the wrong. It’s unutterably sad. It’s why the country has a bully with the mind of a cruel child as president, supported by power, cheered by crowds.”
“I think you can see, if you want to, that there is a powerful political party that doesn’t care about women at all, and thinks not caring is good. I dare hope more of us see this clearly now than we did before.”
Continue scrolling to read the analogy and tell us your thoughts in the comments!
More info: armoxon.com | Twitter
RELATED:
As Judge Brett Kavanaugh has just been confirmed to the US Supreme Court, the world has been hit by a huge wave of anger and protest, regarding sexual abuse and assault
Image credits: Julius Ghost
So author A.R.Moxon described the situation in a way all men could understand
Here’s how the people responded
What do you think ?
Leo Domitrix 7 years ago
I once had to explain to a male acquaintance that rape hurts even fi you don't fight back and get punched. He was utterly clueless tha a penis could harm a vagina. Had advanced degrees, etc., but didn't realize that you can be lying there in shock and terror, utterly still, and it will STILL HURT LIKE HELL... And not just emotionally. Gobsmacking stupidity out there.
Jarno Flinkers 7 years ago
I don't need to be kicked in the nuts to understand the pain causing it. Why is calling someone out on their f*****g nutkicking, a reason for others to threaten you? Because they don't believe it? Nutkickers are everywhere. You might even know one. They don't wear a sign saying "Nutkicker". They could be hiding between young kids, in church, in policestations and even your own home. Sadly but true. If someone says they were kicked in the nuts, believe them! And please do everything to protect them for it ever to happen (again).
BusLady 7 years ago
I don't think he is aiming it at all men. But rather, men who lack that basic respect for women and their bodies. Women are not toys to be used and discarded.
Aileen Cawlfield 7 years ago
@Whatevers not taken and @Rebecca Lipps - Sometimes it’s both. More often it’s about power, because the person is trying to show dominance over the victim, like with chickens and other animals, when the male is trying to get on top of the female. Other times it may be about sex, if the male/female wants to have sex because he just wants to experience the pleasures of sex, and the other person doesn’t, so that’s when rape happens.
Load More Replies...
Don Flynn 7 years ago
One of the most relevant and important things I've read... no means no, not being able to give consent means no. These are attitudes and deep seated beliefs that my brothers I had been given by our mom. Boys will be boys is not a valid excuse, it's complete b******t, and I have heard trump apologists and people who I thought of as good and reasonable say that what was acceptable back them has to be taken into consideration.... this is insane because rape has never been acceptable, sexual assault and harassment have never been acceptable, not for anyone...
Alia G. 7 years ago
I can't believe the comments section on this post. How the f**k are there still people who think it's okay to take away someone's pride, to violate them, to make them believe they don't own their own body? I personally don't know one girl or woman who hasn't been harassed, and all of them have been completely changed and traumatized, including myself. I hope some day in our lifetimes we won't have to worry about being groped.
W. 5 7 years ago
Imagine living in a world where empathy is so rare others need an explanation like this to understand rape and sexual harassment...
Happiness is Hippo 7 years ago
Radu, why do you keep trying to redirect this important conversation to education and capitalism? Does it make you that uncomfortable?
Load More Replies...
Elizabeth 7 years ago
It's sad that our society needs multitudes of explanations like this and others to try and explain why such a thing is such a big deal, and yet there are still those who don't give a damn. SAD. Makes me cry that people don't care about one another
Alex Newell 7 years ago
I'm happy it's getting talked about. Just because we need to open discussion on the issue doesn't make it sad. Those who start to talk about it should be applauded.
Load More Replies...
MonsterMash 7 years ago
Yaaas. It’s sad, though, that there are so many dim-witted men that an analogy must be drawn between their testes and why not to sexually assault women. BUT! Kudos to the author, hopefully this will reach some troglodytes.
somnomania 7 years ago
@Whatevers, I haven't laughed that hard in a while, thanks. Is your mom proud of you for your opinions?
Load More Replies...
Harrison Rose 7 years ago
The reason these analogies need to be made is so people are aware of the results of their actions. It's not to make men who were raped feel unimportant, it's just that the sexual assault of women is something that is so common and so normalized in our society. Yes, men do get raped, and so do women, but these analogies need to be made as long as sexual assault is still a problem in our world and as long as people still blame victims and elect accused sexual harassers into the government.
Wanda McGuire 7 years ago
Great analogy. Here's one I use. What if you're a young man about 15. You go to a party. Two drunk idiots pull you into a bedroom. They hold you down and start groping you. You are terrified. You don't know if they are going to rape you or continue to violently assault you by holding you against your will. You don't know what is going to happen. You are embarrassed, humiliated, and terrified. They are laughing and forcing themselves on you. Then you manage to get away. Do you go running off to tell someone? Who do you tell? Who will believe you? Then you find out years later that one of these violators is going to be sworn into the highest legal positions. Would you come forward? Would you come forward and put your horrible experience in front of the world, only to be mocked by the highest position in your country? Wow! I told my truth in one of the threads. A male responded with "shame on you" because I didn't tell anyone 46 years ago. He just didn't get it!!
Leo Domitrix 7 years ago
I once had to explain to a male acquaintance that rape hurts even fi you don't fight back and get punched. He was utterly clueless tha a penis could harm a vagina. Had advanced degrees, etc., but didn't realize that you can be lying there in shock and terror, utterly still, and it will STILL HURT LIKE HELL... And not just emotionally. Gobsmacking stupidity out there.
Jarno Flinkers 7 years ago
I don't need to be kicked in the nuts to understand the pain causing it. Why is calling someone out on their f*****g nutkicking, a reason for others to threaten you? Because they don't believe it? Nutkickers are everywhere. You might even know one. They don't wear a sign saying "Nutkicker". They could be hiding between young kids, in church, in policestations and even your own home. Sadly but true. If someone says they were kicked in the nuts, believe them! And please do everything to protect them for it ever to happen (again).
BusLady 7 years ago
I don't think he is aiming it at all men. But rather, men who lack that basic respect for women and their bodies. Women are not toys to be used and discarded.
Aileen Cawlfield 7 years ago
@Whatevers not taken and @Rebecca Lipps - Sometimes it’s both. More often it’s about power, because the person is trying to show dominance over the victim, like with chickens and other animals, when the male is trying to get on top of the female. Other times it may be about sex, if the male/female wants to have sex because he just wants to experience the pleasures of sex, and the other person doesn’t, so that’s when rape happens.
Load More Replies... Don Flynn 7 years ago
One of the most relevant and important things I've read... no means no, not being able to give consent means no. These are attitudes and deep seated beliefs that my brothers I had been given by our mom. Boys will be boys is not a valid excuse, it's complete b******t, and I have heard trump apologists and people who I thought of as good and reasonable say that what was acceptable back them has to be taken into consideration.... this is insane because rape has never been acceptable, sexual assault and harassment have never been acceptable, not for anyone...
Alia G. 7 years ago
I can't believe the comments section on this post. How the f**k are there still people who think it's okay to take away someone's pride, to violate them, to make them believe they don't own their own body? I personally don't know one girl or woman who hasn't been harassed, and all of them have been completely changed and traumatized, including myself. I hope some day in our lifetimes we won't have to worry about being groped.
W. 5 7 years ago
Imagine living in a world where empathy is so rare others need an explanation like this to understand rape and sexual harassment...
Happiness is Hippo 7 years ago
Radu, why do you keep trying to redirect this important conversation to education and capitalism? Does it make you that uncomfortable?
Load More Replies... Elizabeth 7 years ago
It's sad that our society needs multitudes of explanations like this and others to try and explain why such a thing is such a big deal, and yet there are still those who don't give a damn. SAD. Makes me cry that people don't care about one another
Alex Newell 7 years ago
I'm happy it's getting talked about. Just because we need to open discussion on the issue doesn't make it sad. Those who start to talk about it should be applauded.
Load More Replies... MonsterMash 7 years ago
Yaaas. It’s sad, though, that there are so many dim-witted men that an analogy must be drawn between their testes and why not to sexually assault women. BUT! Kudos to the author, hopefully this will reach some troglodytes.
somnomania 7 years ago
@Whatevers, I haven't laughed that hard in a while, thanks. Is your mom proud of you for your opinions?
Load More Replies... Harrison Rose 7 years ago
The reason these analogies need to be made is so people are aware of the results of their actions. It's not to make men who were raped feel unimportant, it's just that the sexual assault of women is something that is so common and so normalized in our society. Yes, men do get raped, and so do women, but these analogies need to be made as long as sexual assault is still a problem in our world and as long as people still blame victims and elect accused sexual harassers into the government.
Wanda McGuire 7 years ago
Great analogy. Here's one I use. What if you're a young man about 15. You go to a party. Two drunk idiots pull you into a bedroom. They hold you down and start groping you. You are terrified. You don't know if they are going to rape you or continue to violently assault you by holding you against your will. You don't know what is going to happen. You are embarrassed, humiliated, and terrified. They are laughing and forcing themselves on you. Then you manage to get away. Do you go running off to tell someone? Who do you tell? Who will believe you? Then you find out years later that one of these violators is going to be sworn into the highest legal positions. Would you come forward? Would you come forward and put your horrible experience in front of the world, only to be mocked by the highest position in your country? Wow! I told my truth in one of the threads. A male responded with "shame on you" because I didn't tell anyone 46 years ago. He just didn't get it!!
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