People are complete just by themselves, so we shouldn't think that we have to be with someone to be happy or fulfilled. It is especially important to keep in mind when the relationship isn’t making you happy or you feel like it’s always bringing you down instead of lifting you up.
The signs of a relationship ending with no way of making it better will be different for every couple, so it’s best to trust your instinct. Regardless, humans are curious, so Redditor Nonchalant_Calypso asked, “What was the moment you knew your relationship was over?” and people opened up about their heartbreaks.
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When you feel alone and they're right next to you.
I know that all to well. There's nothing worse than feeling so alone while being in a relationship...
Me too. Trying to figure out how to cause the least possible pain for my 3 kids and my current and future finances but get away from this awful feeling.
Load More Replies...Going through this now after nine years. I don't even know what to do. He has no family at all and I feel guilty for wanting to end it. I know he'll have no place to go. 😞😞
It is better to be alone and lonely, than to be married and lonely. All too true
They say the hardest thing in the world is to be sitting next to someone who means the world to you, knowing you mean nothing to them.
She poisoned my cat Mr Noodle
RIP
Thanks everybody for the support, and if you're asking: yeah I got the police involved
Dude.... The police would come for sure but it wouldn't be to arrest her, it would be to arrest me, Touch my cats and i Will f*****g murder you
Nope. Remember the Three S Rule: "Shoot, Shovel, Shut up". No police necessary
Load More Replies...What kind of frickin lowlife murders a cat?! Jerk head. She deserves to be in jail for life! This one needs to be top. It’s awful. And I’m so sorry for your loss, RIP Mr Noodle. Now I’m off to personally punch her in the face!
Your self control is commendable. I would've whacked the beeyatch.
Omg why did she do that to mr noodles I hope she didn’t stop you from getting another cat but that’s freaking murder…
The day my mom passed away (the coroner hadn't even come for her body yet) with zero consideration on how I felt and what I was going through my ex-fiancé thought it was great idea and a good time to tell me he has been cheating on me for the last 6 years, and how sorry he was for it.
He wasn't sorry he did it, but he sorry because the other woman had lied to him about who she really was and he wanted me to comfort him because he felt betrayed by her....
When I promptly broke up with him, he asked "wait is this really goodbye?" how could you do this to me now?
He did it at this time because he thought she'd be weak and vulnerable so would forgive him rather than dumping him.
What was really going on was a narcissist seeing you expending emotional energy that he thought "belonged" to him, on grieving your grandmother.
I haven't gone through the whole post but this story pissed me off to no end. THE AUDACITY !!!
I was at my best friend's wedding. When he saw his bride walking down the aisle, he had a grin so big it looked like it could have exploded right off of his face. He was so happy to be marrying this person. And when I thought about my, now-ex, gf I realized that I just didn't feel that way about her.
I will say, when I married my wife, I was grinning like an idiot.
It’s not ‘grinning like an idiot’ it’s ‘grinning like a man in love’
I had the same realisation when my best friend got engaged. I realised that I didn't have that level of open, warm enthusiastic affection with my ex. We separated less than a year later. I'm now dating someone who makes me feel loved and special. I appreciate them every day and I feel incredibly happy and lucky!
I had a similar notion with my now-ex who everyone said we would be married and so happy together. At some point it just hit me that we were heading in that direction and my reaction wasn't "oh yay" it was "oh, wait...no." It's a good thing to realize way ahead of time.
When I was going through a miscarriage and he couldn’t take me to the ER because he was in fantasy leagues and football was on.
I meet a girl once, instacrush for me, She was frikking adorable, very sweet but also clumsy as hell lol, that woman was the definition Murphy's law, alas i'm Ugly as f**k and never had a chance, any ways, One day She calls me around 10pm asking if i knew the Number of the guy from whom She bought her car, i Said yes ( he was a friend of mine ) any way long story short her car Lost its brakes on the freeway, She drove Over 4km widout brakes only downshifting and using the handbrake, but She manage to stop saffely, my car was in the shop at that time, só i called a friend of mine to give a Ride to check on her, when i got to where She was, i asked why wasn't her boyfriend there helping her. Her answer " oh he's at home with some friends watching the football match "
She has sh-it taste in men then if she's not realised she is with someone who is not prepared to help her out in difficult times. I'd wonder about how clued up she is. Good looking is he, her boyfriend? She sounds shallow... Sorry.
Load More Replies...I had something like this happen to me my dad wouldn't take me to the hospital when I was in labor and my water had broke and I was having contractions every 3mins the bad ones. He said I have to work tomorrow call an ambulance. When I called at first I was okay then I gave the phone to him and told him if you don't talk them I'm gonna have this baby right here right now. And he started freaking out. Anyhow I made it. But I think I had complications because I didn't push in the ambulance or at home when. As soon as I got in the room I started pushing and she was there. I'm pretty sure when I got to the er door I was crowning. But I don't could of been in the ambulance. But I ended up being okay and the baby did to. But I've never meet such a cold hearted person. He literally did not give s**t.
The lives of his child and wife are in danger, but he is too busy watching a game? Was he a psychopath or something? It wouldn't justify it by any means, but at least it would be more understandable how someone could do something like this. Even the most toxic people I know would have helped
I hope you are no longer with this guy. There are way better people out there. And you are worth more than that. If he treated you like this how would he treat a child when they needed to go to hospital. Major red flags.
I knew when I was in the middle of a C-section with our 2nd daughter and after I had puked (from the spinal) she was born. I turned my head to him and said ILU. He looked away and never responded. I will never forget it, because I knew at that exact moment.
Married for 21 years. The last ten were devoid of any love, warmth, or caring. I (M53) did not want to get divorced and figured this was just the way the rest of my life would be.
We were taking our third shot at marriage counseling and after a few months, my wife says she has to quit counseling because she wants to attend a meditation class at the same time. She had something better to do than work on our marriage.
That's when it hit me that she didn't GAF at all about our marriage and I decided that I did not want that to be the rest of my life.
We're currently 2 1/2 years into divorce. It's painful and expensive. But personally I've never been happier. I am leading my best life. So so glad I decided to move on.
When my husband walked out after 32 years of marriage, I used to have nightmares about how I would cope without him. But then I started having nightmares that he would come back. As you say, best life. It's been 11 years on my own now and just the thought of having to share my life with someone is nauseating.
I don´t think she did consider yoga class more important than her marriage. It was rather her - not very upright way - of communicating: I don´t think this counseling is working, anyway I don´t want/ can´t change the way you want me to, take it or leave it. I´m sorry for both of them, that counseling didn´t manage to create a setting at which they managed to figure out a better way to end things...
Same. The harsh of realizing that they don't GAF is super painful, but really a blessing. Spending the next few years wondering why they didn't GAF, feeling anger that they didn't let you know they didn't GAF, and coming to terms with the fact that you'll never understand, are extra bonuses
I’m so so sorry she did that to you. She was worse than the lowest scum of the earth!
No she’s not. It’s okay for her to not prioritise her marriage just because he wanted to. It’s okay for her to decide she was either happy as is, or didn’t want to stay in the marriage anymore.
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When after 7 years, a particularly cold conversation, and with tears in my eyes I said, "I just want you to love me" and she said
"Well I dont, and dont you feel pathetic for having to ask?"
Edit: This was 5 years ago now and I am doing so much better. The best love is self love.
Jerk! B!tch! Lowlife scum of worms! She’s awful! I’m glad you’re in a better space now, she was awful.
First thought was "Why is she even with this guy if there is no love for him?", then I answer myself with "There are people totally unable to feel love and they need to control and torment others because of their sadistic tendencies".
That's not true. I don't love myself all that much. Sometimes I even hate myself but I honestly love a lot of people in my life. Even though your saying or the more common phrasing "you can't love others until you love yourself" sounds all nice and reflective and poetic. You shouldn't put conditions to love <3
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My ex & I were not living together, but he had the key to my place. I told him that I was gonna go see my parents for the weekend, but then changed my mind last minute because I started feeling sick. I forgot to tell him & just went home after work & went to bed. I woke up around 10pm to get a glass of water & while I was in the kitchen I heard someone fumbling at the door with the lock. I freaked out because I lived on the 17th floor, so if it was a break in, I was f****d. All of a sudden he walks in..... dragging a tipsy girl in behind him.
I just stood there while he tried to make up some sort of excuse as to WHY he was there. The girl was pretty shocked too.
And use your chain lock. That would have let him know the place was occupied.
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When you dread her name coming up on caller ID because you knew it was an argument about nothing. Don’t settle for an angry life.
Or, the guy was a genuinely bad partner. There’s absolutely zero things in the text to indicate she’s a narcissist
Load More Replies...I used to get an anxiety spike every time my ex husband would text. He would text me when I was at work to admonish me for something and I couldn’t do anything because I was at work. He basically Pavlov’s dogged me into being afraid of messages from him. Not good, much happier and relaxed now
Ouch. That can’t be pleasant. Hope your life got better after that.
3 weeks before we broke up she described the kind of guy she would date if we broke up. She described her coworker and I honestly thought they had hooked up by this point. To my delight, he was a good noodle and never wanted to be more than work friends with her. When he found out she left me to be with him he reached out and told me he was sorry for everything even though it wasn't his fault. I told him I'm not holding anything against him, but thanked him for being a good person
Had to cut ties with a friend of mine. His wife came onto me and I told her no he was my friend and you don't do that to friends. He became so suspicious even told me not to talk to her anymore. Acted like he did not want me around, even after our mutual friends and his wife told him I was his true friend. I guess jealousy knows no gender. Sad I lost a friend I really liked hanging with him.
I’m sorry that happened to you :( that must be hard
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She had picked on me for months. Constantly criticizing everything. I couldn't do anything right. I tried. I kissed her a*s and apologized for every single perceived wrongdoing.
After months one day I told her, calmly, you're mean to me.
She blew up. Veins came out and she did that weird growl/yelling thing and told me she'd cut my throat and burn down my house.
I left with my kids to my parents house. Came back the next day she was gone. Haven't seen her since. And strangely, my anxiety is all but gone
She was DEFINITELY a narcissist. Once they realize they don’t have a grip on you anymore, they rage and go bonkers.
Absolutely. I wish I hadn’t experienced this horror first hand, but yeah… terrifying and no logic or emotional involved except their rage.
Load More Replies...I hope you reported her threats to the cops. Even if she "didn't mean it," she deserves having the cops crawl up her backside because she was dumb enough to say those things out loud.
The moment he "accidentally" sent me a text that was supposedly meant for someone else, making plans to hook up at his house. My only response to that was "OK, be safe".
I added quotes because I suspected that he did this on purpose to try and get me to break up with him, expecting some sort of angry response from me. He didn't get that, although I did get an earful from him a couple weeks down the line about how he "never found me attractive physically or romantically". To which I responded, "OK" and never talked to him again.
To this day, I will never understand why some people choose to play games rather than just be upfront. No matter, I'm now happily married to an amazing person!
This is called avoidance - he doesn't want to be the one to end it and have to take the responsibility for the decision. Plus - you're no drama queen anyway, so - well played!
Some people just don't have the strength to stand up for themselves and opening my admit what they want (freedom or not that type of relationship or whatever) and just start harming their partner in order for them make the final move. I don't know how in their mind that is OK, but I definitely know a few people who are like this, and that experience is really hurtful.
Some people mentally rewrite their history in order to make themselves the good guy/girl -- "I never found you physically attractive" et cetera.
Best responses ever. He was so pissed you didn't play his games, I'm sure.
"If you never found me attractive physically or romantically, why did you ever ask me out?!"
She told me that I had a choice. Either I completely cut ties with ALL of my family and ALL of my friends. Or I cut ties with her. That was when I decided that her psycho had crossed a line that I wouldn't break. Very glad I dodged a bullet, very sad I lost close to 4 years of my life before I realized she was psycho.
I told my ex that if he tried to make me choose between him or my family, he would lose. He did, so he did.
I lost a friend in a similar situation. She was so desperate for a relationship she threw away years of friendship with me and out two other two friends for a piece of s**t who forced her to cut everyone off. Whenever she rarely made it to a meet up, he would guilt trip her and then show up early to pick her up. My other two friends believe he was not only emotionally abusive but also physically. I hope she's ok. She had a crush on me but I wasn't really interested but i feel like even if we had dated for a short time should would have at least gotten over having a first boyfriend and known her self worth.
It's important to remember that despotic tyrants in charge of horrific fascist states don't just come out of nowhere. There's a natural pool of them in any population just waiting for their moment to shine. Sometimes they have to settle for tyranny over a relationship rather than a whole country.
You can see it in their eyes when they don't love you anymore.
I'll never forget that feeling.
I remember that feeling only it wasn't that she didn't love me, it's that in our case love just wasn't enough and we both knew it.
That was a very painful realization for me too.
Load More Replies...I got that once; we were long-distanced, hadn't seen each other for two whole weeks, and he was picking me up from my dorm. I was having to psyche myself up (manually) to see him thinking there was something wrong with me that I just wasn't excited to see him. He pulled up, barely looked at me when I got in, gave me the lightest peck on the lips with a "hey" before going in on how tired he was from his drive. My heart just broke at how cold the greeting felt and how it seemed like that every time we met up at that point. It was a realization that neither of us were really in it anymore and the relationship was no longer positive for either of us. It was a messy breakup but it needed to happen.
Oh, my. I've experienced this (someone not loving me). The indifference and total lack of emotion... the way we look at lint, I suppose.
When she came up on caller id and my first thought was "Ugh.".
This also happens with narcissistic friends! I know cause whenever she would call/text me I’d also think ‘ugh’
I changed my ex's ringtone to Darth Vader's theme. It reflects her toxicity & reminds me that I'm better off alone.
When she said “ you don’t look like you are going anywhere with your life “
I was 18 in the middle of college where the hell was I suppose to be at that point
That's when you say, "Oh, I am, just not with you." Drop the mic and walk away.
That was just an excuse to break up and make you take the blame. Let it go!
When I had fertility tests done after 2 years of trying to fall pregnant.
He left me the same day I found out I was infertile.
What a f*****g twatbasket. Your only worth was a breeder? He wasn't a man worth knowing.
My coworker did this to his wife. He was cheating and looking for a way out so when he found out she was infertile he used that as his excuse. I have no time for that oxygen thief.
The opposite happened with me. I could have kids and my husband couldn’t have cared less. I finally told him IVF or the marriage. We have 2 kids who I wouldn’t trade for anything but sure wish I had walked away back then.
Doesn't sound like parent material anyway. You have options, he's just a loser.
You’re a hell of a lot more than it’s an incubator. It isn’t your fault you’re infertile. Hugs
I was going through a cancer scare. She didn’t come with me to any appointments because she didn’t want to miss class. She was my best friend and the only person in the city who I told about what was happening. She, however, told several of her friends and classmates and let the news spread through our program (I think she liked the second-hand sympathy). She minimized everything, told me I was overreacting when I went to her for support, and told me I’d feel better if I just stopped touching the mass. When it came time to decide what to do when our lease ended, I chose to move home to be with my family. We broke it off, she moved out, and two days later I was diagnosed with cancer.
I know it sounds bad, but I’m better for having gone through it. I’ll always hold that cancer was one of the best things to happen to me.
People show their true colors in times of crisis. You dodged another bullet, my friend. Best of luck to you.
Yes they do and that is the sad part but sometimes it for the best.
Load More Replies...that sounds like that Ben Moon book Denali. It's about how he and his dog went through life together. so heartwarming
When he proposed to me in front of a crowd of over 3,000 people, at a job we BOTH worked at, just two weeks after we had gotten into one of the worst fights we had ever had. What was the topic of the fight? He had joked about proposing and I told him I didn’t feel ready to be married.
The relationship lasted for about 6 months after that, but the ring never felt like anything more than a shackle.
He cornered you like an animal and didn't think you had the courage to get out.
I made a Bored Panda account just to post this comment :)) So, you should have said NO in front of all those 3000 people. It would have been the response he deserved and the best lesson for him.
I can't imagine a proposal where the couple hasn't already discussed marriage and decided it was what they both wanted. In that case, I don't think it matters if the actual proposal is public or private. If you've never discussed marriage, or if you have and haven't agreed on it, then yes, keep that shït private
I always hated seeing those public proposals. Like at a basketball game up on the jumbotrons. I think the person doing the proposal does it just for their ego. I mean what a total ambush. I would be pissed if I was proposed to that way. Are you supposed to say yes so not to embarrass them and then let them down in private?
Proposals should be private affairs until the ring is on her finger and then the rest of their family and friends can be told. People who do this in front of crowds have an attention-seeking issue, and also generally don't take it well if the answer is "no." Tough beans.
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Found nude pictures of her and some other dude on the family camera and they were taken on our couch in our living room in our house.
So.... You cheat and are even worst to do that in the home you share with your partner. Classy. And you are in addition stupide enough to get pictures that your SO can find randomly. If she didn't do it on purpose she'is particularly dumb
He had a can of drink, asked if anyone wanted any (we were in a group)..I said yes please so he poured it in the bin.
Sounds minor, but this was the last thing after alot of s**t.
Better than having a jug full of cold water poured over your head while you're eating. True story.
I would always be the one to initiate talking and taking part in activities together. I realized I was the only one putting effort in.
Ughh this is me in like every relationship even friendships. I’m so done initiating
So oh, I’m not the only toxic friend magnet out there? (Your friends are probably toxic or just forgetful or lazy)
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When I realized I dreaded Fridays, our standard date night, and saw it as something I needed to get past before I could start enjoying the weekend.
LIfe's too short to waste a day - end it now and say what you need to say.
I made an account just to suggest not having your email address as your public username on a popular website.
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We used to get in some real bad arguments. These arguments would often end in her hitting me. Once in a while, she'd really go to town on me. I can take a hit, but she could throw a punch. Girl had a hell of right hook. Years of that, off and on.
Anyway, one evening, one such argument turns into her just wailing on me. And I finally snapped. I pushed her up against the wall and was ready to hit her back. Just for a moment.
I didn't. I walked away. The fight didn't end there, and the relationship didn't end that night. But I walked away for good not long after.
Good for you for stopping yourself, and good for you for getting out of an abusive relationship.
She's going to end up putting some poor guy in jail or worse.
No one should be hitting anyone. As a woman I expect if I hit someone they should hit me back. So don’t do it.
I know of a guy whose wife was physically abuse. I warned his mother to document the abuse, police, hospital, etc. She had lost friends because she abused animals. It would only be time before she abused their daughter.
I had a girl punch me twice and it didn't even phase me and I could have hit her back and if I did I wouldn't really hurt her.
Good on you for resisting! You’re a man for real! Hope our life got better after that
When her Dad, who i had just met, told her to stop being a b***h or she would lose me. (looking back at it, she was being a total b***h, but it was her dad saying it that opened my eyes.) We broke up after her parents left.
I knew a couple who were both very religious--IIRC, her parents introduced her to him in church. Even when they were dating, *she'd* want her father there as a "chaperone," and whenever my friend asked her anything, rather than giving her own opinion, she'd ask her father first. They got married anyway--and that's when she started physically and verbally abusing him. He literally hadn't realized until they were living in their own house, away from her parents, that her parents were basically a buffer. They knew she had serious psychological issues, but they also knew that, if my friend knew about the issues, they'd never be able to marry her off so she wouldn't be their problem anymore. He put up with it for two years before he finally divorced her, and he's now happily married to someone else.
Not if he was right. Maybe she was truly being a b***h and Dad was just telling it like it is. He didn't say he would stop loving her he just said she would lose OP. And he was right. So I don't know. I love my son more than life but I once told him he was an a*****e when he was joining in with his friends making fun of someone, and I meant it.
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I got into a car accident and called him and he didn't care
He stopped talking to me 3 days into a 3 week holiday, I made the best of it, once home the silent treatment continued for another 3 weeks. He rolls over in bed one morning and starts talking like nothing happened. I should have ended it long before, but THAT was the moment I knew it was over.
Why the silent treatment? Was it because you had done something "wrong"? It is not helpful, just childish.
Maybe it wasn’t anything they did wrong at all. Just the other person being extremely avoidant about something they themselves did wrong.
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I hadn't slept in our bed for 18 months and asked "Don't you even miss me in here?"
"No"
Edit: I offered to sleep in the guest room due to my snoring (weight gain, stress of working several jobs, and general stress of life/marriage). We never slept in the same bed again.
I now know after therapy I was immensely depressed and am much better at taking care of myself both physically and mentally.
While the marriage didn't recover, we have 2 amazing kids and my headspace is much more free.
This is sad, but a side note: some couples prefer sleeping alone. My husband snores terribly and has restless leg syndrome. I take forever to fall asleep & am an insomniac. We have seperate rooms & have been happily married going on 17 years now :)
I see that happening in the future with my husband and I. We both have sleeping problems which have been manageable so far but when it comes down to it, if we have to sleep in separate bedrooms to get a good night's sleep, then so be it. It doesn't say anything about our marriage other than we both need to sleep!
Load More Replies...My husband sounds like he's calling the pigs home sometimes, but even if we sleep apart, I still can't sleep without feeling him next to me. I will use earbuds, sleep meds, or just nudge him to roll over before either of us leave to sleep apart (though I totally understand couples who have their own separate bed, sometimes it's needed).
VitaSleep mouth piece works to stop my husband's snoring!!
Load More Replies...I get that would hurt like hell. My bf snores so loud we can’t be in the same room to sleep but we do cuddle for a bit before bed.
Same happened to me. Separate beds is the end. My experience, don't downvote me just because you disagree.
To be fair, I probably wouldn't miss my husband if he stopped sleeping in our bed - because he games until like 1am as it is, while I go to bed at 10pm and get up at 5ish. I do, however, think we'd be intimate more often if we had more congruent sleeping patterns...
When we were arguing for the umpteenth time and I lost the will to continue. I usually begged her to stay but I just told her to go
Same but 30 years of marriage with kids is hard to walk away from
Load More Replies...But - you'll never look back and regret that you didn't do everything you could.
When I saw how she completely changed when her boss was around. She became much more pleasant, flirty, and amenable. That's when I realized the only reason she was dating me was in hopes it would make her boss jealous enough to leave his wife for her.
Eeewwwww. Haven't we bred that one out of the gene pool yet?
When she repeatedly slammed her head through the wall claiming a demon was telling her to do it, and then threatened to call the cops and say I beat her up.
This person had issues that's for sure. Was she suffering a mental illness? Does not excuse the threat though.
There are some mental illnesses/disorders that are truly that bad. I had a half-brother who would have psychotic breaks & make all kinds of threats when he went off his meds. He never went this far tho. According to the OP's replies on reddit, after he left her, the ex did get diagnosed with BPD & got treatment. Apparently she's doing very well now & is married to someone else.
Load More Replies...I was engaged to my girlfriend of 5.5 years (3.5 dating 2 engaged) I noticed that out of nowhere she started acting very suspicious and more cautious of her phone around me and not wanting me to be around her when she was playing games with people on discord which I didn't really care about. I knew something was up when I would tell her I loved her and to have a good day when she would leave for work and she would just kinda smile and nod. One day I was cleaning up around the house and noticed that she had left her computer open and saw some messages between her and a guy she plays games with talking about some things that I would rather not repeat. When I confronted her about it, I was gaslit and made out to be crazy. I knew then it was the beginning of the end. A year and a half later I finally had enough evidence and she admitted to cheating on me for a year and a half. 6 months before our wedding. I'm still not over it after a year and a half later and I genuinely don't think I'll be able to trust the same again.
yep, it breaks your trust. I've had something similar happen and as a result would rather never feel anything for another adult again.
When she choose the night before my finals (exactly 2am - finals were at 8am) to confess to cheating basically. Ruined my final exams that sem.
That Lowlife probably did that on purpose. I hope it didn’t set you back!
Hanging out with them feels often like a chore than something you’re excited about
Walking on eggshells to avoid them getting mad
They don’t match your efforts like they used to
Noticing they don’t listen when you’re talking
They don’t feel like ‘home’ anymore
They download Tinder and see people
They cheat on you
I can relate to them not feeling like home. Like, I'd dread coming home to my ex after a day of work because I couldn't relax in the house.
Bad relationships die a natural death but it's hard to let go. Acknowledge the truth and move on.
We had been long distance for a couple of months and I actually felt relieved to be hundreds of miles away from him. He never called me or texted, it was always me who reached out. I got tired of it and started calling less and less. One day, after we hadn't spoken for a few weeks, i called him and he answered and sounded surprised to hear from me. Conversation went:
Me - "hey, it's me"
Him - "Oh...hi? ...why are you calling me?"
Me - "no reason. Just to say hi"
Him - "Oh, okay, well I was actually just doing something. Can I call you another day?"
And, after years of awful screaming arguments and stupid games, that's when I knew the relationship was dead.
We'd had our ups and downs for the better part of 8 months, one day we met for lunch and she sat down and started talking. All of a sudden it was like I woke up from a dream and realized I wasn't attracted to or interested in them at all. There had been much worse moments so it was surprising it happened during everyday conversation.
This happened with my ex and me. She was hanging out at my place one night and asked if I wanted to go in the bedroom together. I even surprised myself when I said, "No. I don't." In that moment I realized I was no longer attracted to her, and I had been deeply unhappy throughout our relationship. She was so horrible to me in private and so amazing to everyone else in public. I thought I was going crazy. The day I ended it, I felt like a weight had been lifted.
when he went from spending so much time with me and giving me updates about his day without me having to ask him, to going MIA for days on end to the point where i had to beg for him to spend some time together. found out from a mutual friend that he had started seeing someone on the side two weeks before we called it off.
When even just asking to hang out, felt like a chore. It just wasn’t worth it anymore more.
“I just couldn’t do it, they were such a bore”
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Everything starts an argument.
We took a break and I realized I was so much happier just doing my own thing. We were 23, had been dating for 6 years. She had graduated college and I was finishing up.
I worked the front desk in college, and would take my laptop down to play video games ( chill job). She wanted to argue and came down at about 11pm and gets mad and closes my laptop. She said she was done. I go out to get flowers after my shift, this is midnight, and go to her dorm room to give them to her. Another guy was already there in boxers…I’m almost sure the relationship had been over for a while, I just found out late…
After I separated from my first wife, I was dating a girl who was also separated and goung through her divorce. Tried to keep each other out things. my ex wife was being ridiculous, using the children as leverage, trying to extort money etc it put me into a real bad slump/depression. Then I saw the girl I was dating, knowing how badly it was hurting me literally do the exact same thing to her ex.
just leave them alone and get used to being comfortable with being by yourself. your worth is NOT measured by having a partner.
When we bought a house together and I proposed that same dat we closed. The next day she did a 180 and was completely different person. Stuck it out for almost 3 yrs but I had enough of the horrible treatment. Tried to tell her that Im her partner and not another child in the house. Never got through to her.
When she started being cold to me, and being unsure about our relationship. Then she started talking about this "guy" from her class. You know the rest.
Every time I did something wrong she could never tell me, it was always her friend that would text me/pull me aside to tell me. I had to grow and learn to be better so I cut it off
When I found out she was sending nudes to people on discord. Had a gut feeling it would go past just pictures and I was right.
Life was stagnant.
We mutually called it quits after we had a talk, and it went better for both of us. We gave it the good ol' college try but we still grew apart.
Good times
When she wanted to meet at a coffee shop. Never seen her drink coffee once.
They said that pineapple does not belong on pizzas. I quickly showed them the door.
Things had been bad for years. I was super depressed, to the point that I often prayed to just not wake up anymore. He was an emotionally, fiscally and physically abusive serial cheater. I'd been talking to a catholic priest about my relationship expecting him to push for reconciliation, but even he said I needed to get out! Then a few weeks later, the sound of my car being pulled out of its parking spot in order to be repoed for the second time in 3 months just snapped everything into focus. I walked into the living room and told him the rent was paid for 3 more weeks, I'd be moved out by the weekend, what he did after that was not my concern. I'b been working crazy hours to try and keep us afloat because he quit his job and was not trying to find another while he was drinking and had gotten hooked on pain killers..I was just done. 12 years later and I am married to my best friend.
Mine was when I was in ICU with double pneumonia. I had two tubes in my chest to drain the fluid and had a very high fever. I didn't really come around until 4 days in, and that's when I found out he had been talking to someone else and he never came to see me. He did, however, call me to scream at me because someone at the hospital told him I'd had 2 blood transfusions and he demanded to know "what I had" because obviously I had to have my blood cleaned, so I better tell him. Yeah. Nevermind I almost died. He made my life a living hell but I had the last laugh. He'd been a fire captain but was a horrible drunk. He was fired from the dept for drinking on the job, then lost his side business and eventually married AND divorced within the next 5 years. Karma does not play
My therapist asked me if I wanted to be in my relationship, or if I just wanted to be able to say that I was in a relationship. It was a gut check moment for me. This was several years ago, and I'm out as Ace and Aro, and much happier in myself. Being in a relationship that doesn't fit is like wearing shoes a size too small.
For me, it was realizing one day that either I break up with this person, or stay with them for the rest of our lives, and I just could not imagine the latter in any sort of pleasant way. Best I could imagine was a sort of... resigned acceptance, and that's not something I want from my life, nor do I want to waste either of our time trying to continue.
Somehow it hits hard. I feel like that sometimes when we fight over stupid stuff and he gets so petty and does small petty things just to p**s me off... Currently I'm not sure if it's something I want to put up with for the rest of my life. It isn't a big deal, but...
Load More Replies...I played him some blues music. He made a racist remark. I was outta there.
Never stay for the kids; never think that your partner is the best you can do; never say isnbetter thhan being lonely; never say 'it's just how he/she is'; never think you've invested too much time to loose it all; and if you have to leave but aren't in the best place: open new bank account, sace, get all your important documents, confide in some for a safe place until you arenback in your feet, LAWYER UP, screenshot everything, once again lawyer up and save as much as you can.
He wanted me to give him sex whenever he wanted it, even if I didn't. I had a horrible kidney infection and he asked my doctor if he could catch it during sex. He wanted sex even when I was in agony. He told me that no one else would put up with my mental health issues so I *owed* him. I spent a month in a psychiatric hospital because every time he f****d me, I would be contemplating the best way to kill myself. I left him 16 years ago and have no regrets.
married for 32 yrs. over the last 5 i discovered just how deceitful he was and how far he was willing to go to be an a*****e. i was diagnosed with a degenerative disease but i wasn't an invalid. there were other issues that has been building up as well. he had a home office downstairs but apparently one night he was too lazy to go down to his computer and used my laptop...but didn't close it out. woke up to find an ad of sorts (way before tinder and those kind of apps, btw) in which he proclaimed that he really did love his wife but because of her disability wanted/needed a friends with benefit relationship. i figured if he was basically looking for a pity f*ck then he really had become someone i didn't know any longer. confronted him with it and, not surprisingly, he was at a loss for words. told him that he really needed to do some soul searching if he felt the only way he could garner attention was to try to play on some woman's sympathies. but, there is alway karma.
They said that pineapple does not belong on pizzas. I quickly showed them the door.
Things had been bad for years. I was super depressed, to the point that I often prayed to just not wake up anymore. He was an emotionally, fiscally and physically abusive serial cheater. I'd been talking to a catholic priest about my relationship expecting him to push for reconciliation, but even he said I needed to get out! Then a few weeks later, the sound of my car being pulled out of its parking spot in order to be repoed for the second time in 3 months just snapped everything into focus. I walked into the living room and told him the rent was paid for 3 more weeks, I'd be moved out by the weekend, what he did after that was not my concern. I'b been working crazy hours to try and keep us afloat because he quit his job and was not trying to find another while he was drinking and had gotten hooked on pain killers..I was just done. 12 years later and I am married to my best friend.
Mine was when I was in ICU with double pneumonia. I had two tubes in my chest to drain the fluid and had a very high fever. I didn't really come around until 4 days in, and that's when I found out he had been talking to someone else and he never came to see me. He did, however, call me to scream at me because someone at the hospital told him I'd had 2 blood transfusions and he demanded to know "what I had" because obviously I had to have my blood cleaned, so I better tell him. Yeah. Nevermind I almost died. He made my life a living hell but I had the last laugh. He'd been a fire captain but was a horrible drunk. He was fired from the dept for drinking on the job, then lost his side business and eventually married AND divorced within the next 5 years. Karma does not play
My therapist asked me if I wanted to be in my relationship, or if I just wanted to be able to say that I was in a relationship. It was a gut check moment for me. This was several years ago, and I'm out as Ace and Aro, and much happier in myself. Being in a relationship that doesn't fit is like wearing shoes a size too small.
For me, it was realizing one day that either I break up with this person, or stay with them for the rest of our lives, and I just could not imagine the latter in any sort of pleasant way. Best I could imagine was a sort of... resigned acceptance, and that's not something I want from my life, nor do I want to waste either of our time trying to continue.
Somehow it hits hard. I feel like that sometimes when we fight over stupid stuff and he gets so petty and does small petty things just to p**s me off... Currently I'm not sure if it's something I want to put up with for the rest of my life. It isn't a big deal, but...
Load More Replies...I played him some blues music. He made a racist remark. I was outta there.
Never stay for the kids; never think that your partner is the best you can do; never say isnbetter thhan being lonely; never say 'it's just how he/she is'; never think you've invested too much time to loose it all; and if you have to leave but aren't in the best place: open new bank account, sace, get all your important documents, confide in some for a safe place until you arenback in your feet, LAWYER UP, screenshot everything, once again lawyer up and save as much as you can.
He wanted me to give him sex whenever he wanted it, even if I didn't. I had a horrible kidney infection and he asked my doctor if he could catch it during sex. He wanted sex even when I was in agony. He told me that no one else would put up with my mental health issues so I *owed* him. I spent a month in a psychiatric hospital because every time he f****d me, I would be contemplating the best way to kill myself. I left him 16 years ago and have no regrets.
married for 32 yrs. over the last 5 i discovered just how deceitful he was and how far he was willing to go to be an a*****e. i was diagnosed with a degenerative disease but i wasn't an invalid. there were other issues that has been building up as well. he had a home office downstairs but apparently one night he was too lazy to go down to his computer and used my laptop...but didn't close it out. woke up to find an ad of sorts (way before tinder and those kind of apps, btw) in which he proclaimed that he really did love his wife but because of her disability wanted/needed a friends with benefit relationship. i figured if he was basically looking for a pity f*ck then he really had become someone i didn't know any longer. confronted him with it and, not surprisingly, he was at a loss for words. told him that he really needed to do some soul searching if he felt the only way he could garner attention was to try to play on some woman's sympathies. but, there is alway karma.
