Woman Worried About Her Daughter When Her Ex Becomes Her BIL

She broke up with him because something just felt “off.” And because he did something in the bedroom that left her terrified. What she did not expect was for him to move on and marry her sister. Years have passed and she still can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to this man than meets the eye.

This mom is now refusing to allow her 13-year-old daughter to go on a family vacation with her cousins, for fear that her creepy ex might try something unthinkable. She’s reached out to strangers online in a lengthy post, wondering if she’s just being paranoid or if her gut feeling is right. And some of the details the woman included have left netizens reeling.

She’s never been able to shake the feeling that her ex is a creepy man, especially after he moved on and married her sister

Image credits: yanalya / freepik (not the actual photo)

Now, she’s worried he’s eyeing her 13-year-old daughter too, and some netizens think she may be right

Image credits: doidam10 / freepik (not the actaul photo)

Image credits: Few-Plum-7258

The comments came in thick and fast but some people missed the point

Some called out the mom and told her to “lighten up”

Things reached a boiling point after the woman had a heart-to-heart with her brother

Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Few-Plum-7258

Grooming isn’t always easy to identify, here’s how to spot it, according to police

“Grooming is when a person builds a relationship with a child, young person or an adult who’s at risk so they can mistreat them and manipulate them into doing things,” explains the U.K.’s Metropolitan Police Department. The groomer could have various motives but they’re generally harmful and/or illegal.  

Some believe grooming takes place over months or years, but the police say this isn’t always the case. It can happen over a short period too, online or in person.

At the heart of grooming lies manipulation and these people will go to great lengths to gain a victim’s trust.

“Groomers are good at lying about who they are, particularly online where they can create a false identity and pretend to be younger than they are,” notes the Metropolitan Police site. They might use social media networks, text messages and messaging apps, email, text, voice and video chats in forums, games and apps to communicate with the victim.

When it comes to in-person grooming, the perpetrator can be a stranger, friend, family member, colleague or someone else known to the victim. In these cases, the victim might already trust the groomer.

Image credits: Ivonne Lecou / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

According to experts, it can be difficult to tell if someone is being groomed. “The signs aren’t always obvious and may be hidden,” warn the police. However, they add that there are some red flags to look out for.

If you suspect your child, or someone you know is being groomed, ask yourself a few questions before taking action. For example, are they being secretive about how they’re spending their time? Do they have an older boyfriend or girlfriend? Do they have money or new things like clothes and mobile phones that they can’t or won’t explain?

If they’re suddenly spending more or less time than usual online or on their devices, there might be reason to worry. Same applies if they’re seeming upset or withdrawn, or are using language you wouldn’t expect them to know. Spending more time away from home or going missing for periods of time are also red flags.

The police warn that the person being groomed often will have no idea that it’s happening because the groomer has gained their trust. He/she might be giving them lots of attention and gifts. And an important point to note is that the victim might have been warned or threatened not to talk to anyone about it.

Some advised the mother to have an honest conversation with her teen

Many people were worried about the daughter and felt the BIL was a “monster”

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