Woman Leaves Dinner Hungry Again After Sharing Her Food, Gets A Reality Check From Boyfriend
Our relationship with food is not just about consumption. It also involves respect and consideration for others. Reddit user PhantomDetective3548 is concerned that his girlfriend’s kindness is being taken advantage of. When they’re out, she always offers bites from her plate, whether it’s a simple appetizer or her main course, and during their last dinner with friends, one of the guy’s buddies ate far more than he should have, leaving her with mere crumbs. So, he’s turned to the internet for advice on how to get her to set healthy boundaries.
This guy got a girlfriend who always shares her food
Image credits: zinkevych (not the actual image)
And he’s getting increasingly annoyed with how much she lets others eat
Image credits: beststudio (not the actual image)
Image credits: TriangleProd (not the actual image)
Image credits: PhantomDetective3548
Not being able to control the amount of food others take is one of the reasons why some people don’t share theirs in the first place
A poll of 2,000 adults found that four in ten people (39 per cent) identify with a famous catchphrase from the 90’s sitcom FRIENDS, “Joey doesn’t share food!”
More than a fifth (22 per cent) have even imitated the expression when someone has tried to take some of their meal.
Top reasons for people never or rarely sharing include not liking other people touching their food (50 percent) and wanting to enjoy what they paid for (40 percent).
But 17 percent of non-sharers said they would be more willing to give others a bite if they could control the exact amount they give away.
Commenting on these figures, psychologist Dr. Rachel Taylor said that, actually, a lot of good can come from sharing food.
“Sharing food and eating together have deep-rooted social and neuropsychological benefits,” she explained. “Eating together triggers positive feelings of trust and empathy – a primal need that evokes safety and comfort from years of evolution.”
“Research has shown that after a food-sharing event, circulating oxytocin levels, also known as the love hormone, increase, so when we share food, our brains associate it with social bonding and feelings of belongingness.”
But non-sharers are missing out on quite a bit of bonding
“You could say food sharing is quite literally sharing the love,” Taylor added.
“Looking specifically at sweet treats, like doughnuts, there’s the added benefit of the brain seeing it as a reward – so when we share these, or see someone else sharing a sweet treat, our mirror neurons allow us to empathise and build stronger connections to those people.”
But the difference of opinion between our Redditor and his girlfriend might even be rooted in human nature. The study revealed men are nearly twice as likely as women to never share their food (14 per cent compared to just 8 per cent).
Sweets (53 per cent), crisps (43 per cent), and doughnuts (23 per cent) are the foods people are most willing to split. On the other hand, chocolate (22 per cent), pizza (17 per cent), and chips (15 per cent) are the least likely to be shared.
As his story went viral, the guy provided more information on his girlfriend’s eating habits
Quite a few people blamed him for confronting his partner instead of his friend
But some said his girlfriend needs to be more mindful of how much she shares
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
Standing up to his friend is too much for his weak ego. Better to blame the girlfriend (and unload his personal, unasked-for opinion about "saliva in her food" on us - OP suffers from main character syndrome).
Yep. She appears to have a legitimate problem. Brian appears to also have a problem, but is his a compulsion ? But kike the one poster said, OP forgives Brian ( that's just the way he is ) but expects his girlfriend to manage her problem by managing Brian's problem.
Load More Replies...I don't think OP is wrong in telling his GF to be careful with sharing her food since it's valid advice. But he is very wrong in not telling this Brian person that when someone says 'want to try?' it doesn't mean 'have it all', shared appetisers are meant to be SHARED and taxes and tips are a very real thing. This Brian is definitely NOT the messiah, he's a very naughty boy :)
It's disingenuous to complain about paying for the meal when OP knew in advance that GF was going to offer it and Brian was going to eat quite a bit. It really seems he only offered to pay so he could claim some grounds for complaining about it. OP complains about GF offering food and Brian accepting the offer but the situation can just was easily be seen as him offering to pay and the girlfriend accepting even though it's they've had this argument before and it's going to cause an issue. Just don't offer to pay if you aren't giving the meal as a gift.
OP stated at one point that girlfriend was raised that she needs to make sure everyone else is fed before she can eat. If true, it sounds like girlfriend should get therapy to ensure her food sharing comes from a healthy place and develop strategies to control how much she shares.
If I was the bf, I'd speak to Brian directly. "No matter what my gf says, you do NOT eat ANY of her food. Got it? Good."
I still can’t believe the NTA going after his GF. I checked out the OP and it’s crazy. The telling her to pay for her own food and then subjecting her to his gluttonous, inconsiderate friend is ridiculous. He spent more time talking bout her faults and just accepts Brian as he is. My BIL is clueless like this too. He’s the dude who goes into empty restaurants 2 minutes before closing. The one time he paid (we usually always pay for everyone), he took everyone’s leftovers. He also likes to tag leftovers with sticky notes with his name and saying don’t touch in my house when he stays over.
Wow, a "this person is great in every way expect this giant red flag" and it's a friend this time! I think ESH: her for not just having some boundaries, OP for expecting GF to manage Brian, and Brian for being a moocher, taking advantage of OP. I refuse to believe that he's such a great person in every other respect but when it comes to being cheap and greedy with food. JUST STOP EATING WITH HIM or get separate checks, FFS.
I had a friend who would just reach into my plate. Fine. But it got worse. I was having a Thai stir fry and she was having a curry. She tasted my dish and next thing I know, she’s scooping the sauce onto her rice. I told her to ask for sauce on the side. She goes on to explain how my sauce is better because it’s flavored with the meat and vegetables, that she likes it better. I told her so do I and she had enough. She got super pissy with me. I also grew up with brothers who did stuff like this. Painstakingly picking out crab meat only to have one of my brothers come up behind me and fork up all of my crab meat. Make a lunch, he would take it. I really hate how some people, who aren’t poor do stuff like this. It’s rude and inconsiderate.
I stopped reading after the first person asked a question, and OP says, "I assume you're asking for INFO?" Dude, lighten the fnck up.
OP needs to start asking Brian for money in advance for eating all of OP's girlfriend's food! "Hey, Brian! Give me $20 and you can eat all of GF's food, that I paid for!"
I would never want to eat with this young lady or (I’m guessing) her family, because what is this “no you try it before I have!” nonsense…
It's entirely up to you who you do or do not dine with, but if he wants to remain in a relationship with this woman he can back right off with telling her what to do with her own food.
Load More Replies...Standing up to his friend is too much for his weak ego. Better to blame the girlfriend (and unload his personal, unasked-for opinion about "saliva in her food" on us - OP suffers from main character syndrome).
Yep. She appears to have a legitimate problem. Brian appears to also have a problem, but is his a compulsion ? But kike the one poster said, OP forgives Brian ( that's just the way he is ) but expects his girlfriend to manage her problem by managing Brian's problem.
Load More Replies...I don't think OP is wrong in telling his GF to be careful with sharing her food since it's valid advice. But he is very wrong in not telling this Brian person that when someone says 'want to try?' it doesn't mean 'have it all', shared appetisers are meant to be SHARED and taxes and tips are a very real thing. This Brian is definitely NOT the messiah, he's a very naughty boy :)
It's disingenuous to complain about paying for the meal when OP knew in advance that GF was going to offer it and Brian was going to eat quite a bit. It really seems he only offered to pay so he could claim some grounds for complaining about it. OP complains about GF offering food and Brian accepting the offer but the situation can just was easily be seen as him offering to pay and the girlfriend accepting even though it's they've had this argument before and it's going to cause an issue. Just don't offer to pay if you aren't giving the meal as a gift.
OP stated at one point that girlfriend was raised that she needs to make sure everyone else is fed before she can eat. If true, it sounds like girlfriend should get therapy to ensure her food sharing comes from a healthy place and develop strategies to control how much she shares.
If I was the bf, I'd speak to Brian directly. "No matter what my gf says, you do NOT eat ANY of her food. Got it? Good."
I still can’t believe the NTA going after his GF. I checked out the OP and it’s crazy. The telling her to pay for her own food and then subjecting her to his gluttonous, inconsiderate friend is ridiculous. He spent more time talking bout her faults and just accepts Brian as he is. My BIL is clueless like this too. He’s the dude who goes into empty restaurants 2 minutes before closing. The one time he paid (we usually always pay for everyone), he took everyone’s leftovers. He also likes to tag leftovers with sticky notes with his name and saying don’t touch in my house when he stays over.
Wow, a "this person is great in every way expect this giant red flag" and it's a friend this time! I think ESH: her for not just having some boundaries, OP for expecting GF to manage Brian, and Brian for being a moocher, taking advantage of OP. I refuse to believe that he's such a great person in every other respect but when it comes to being cheap and greedy with food. JUST STOP EATING WITH HIM or get separate checks, FFS.
I had a friend who would just reach into my plate. Fine. But it got worse. I was having a Thai stir fry and she was having a curry. She tasted my dish and next thing I know, she’s scooping the sauce onto her rice. I told her to ask for sauce on the side. She goes on to explain how my sauce is better because it’s flavored with the meat and vegetables, that she likes it better. I told her so do I and she had enough. She got super pissy with me. I also grew up with brothers who did stuff like this. Painstakingly picking out crab meat only to have one of my brothers come up behind me and fork up all of my crab meat. Make a lunch, he would take it. I really hate how some people, who aren’t poor do stuff like this. It’s rude and inconsiderate.
I stopped reading after the first person asked a question, and OP says, "I assume you're asking for INFO?" Dude, lighten the fnck up.
OP needs to start asking Brian for money in advance for eating all of OP's girlfriend's food! "Hey, Brian! Give me $20 and you can eat all of GF's food, that I paid for!"
I would never want to eat with this young lady or (I’m guessing) her family, because what is this “no you try it before I have!” nonsense…
It's entirely up to you who you do or do not dine with, but if he wants to remain in a relationship with this woman he can back right off with telling her what to do with her own food.
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