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Every day, we perform so many tasks that we instantly forget about them. Meeting the deadline at work, picking kids up from school, reserving a dinner table, paying bills, doing this and that; no wonder our heads are spinning by the end of the week.
Whatever we do, even if we do so voluntarily, we have to follow some general rules, sometimes strict instructions or simply common sense to complete each task. But what happens when a person not just does what they’re supposed to do, but does so in such a literal way that it modifies the initial task altogether?
Call it a sense of humor, malicious compliance, a miscommunication, or a human error, but one thing is clear, every now and then, people take stuff at face value. Below Bored Panda wrapped up some of the funniest examples to remind everyone that we had better be clear than sorry. More literally completed jobs await in our previous post here.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
We Told Our 3-Year-Old That New Year Is Special Because You Get To Toast. Later, She Said: "Are We Gonna Make A Toast Now?" And Thus, A New Year's Day Tradition Was Born
Kevin Garren 3 years ago
I mean, don't promise her toast if you're not going to give her toast.
parmadillo 3 years ago
Youāre looking pretty rosy, young lady. Exactly how many toasts have you had?
RELATED:
#2
This Is The Picture Amazon Sent My Bill To Say The Packages Were "Delivered To A Family Member Directly"
Kevin Garren 3 years ago
I had an Amazon order once. they took a photo of it for delivery proof and they put it on my front porch and the photo had 5 kittens immediately getting on it.
OGA 3 years ago
I love it. I give the delivery guy the highest possible rating because he understands our pets are family too. š
Mike Schantini 3 years ago
We left it and the end of your sidewalk because Max would not let us get any closer.
#3
Someone At A Festival Offered Me A Little Bag Of Coke
BadCat 3 years ago
ooooo That's such a cute little coca cola bottle. I'd love that for my dolls.
Memere 3 years ago
Lots of hobby & craft stores will have them, look in the dollhouse/miniatures section! Or look online for dollhouse miniatures.
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Let’s make one thing clear – people are destined for miscommunication, for one reason or the other. Sometimes it happens by accident, other times it depends on the wrong assumption or interpretation, and other times we do it deliberately to prove a point. Call it an act of malicious compliance, a phenomenon well documented on various online platforms.
At the same time, if we want to make a real connection, miscommunication between us and the other person will break the deal. After all, social interaction follows us everywhere: at work, on a date, while out with friends, or having a coffee with your bff. So how could we possibly gain that confidence to express ourselves so that we are understood? Bruce Lambert, a professor, scientist, and consultant who has taught thousands of people all across the United States how to communicate more effectively, may have some answers.
#4
My Grandma Wanted Some "Creative" Grad Photos Of My Friend Since We're Graduating At The Same Time. This Was Her Least Favorite
#5
Sheās A Genius
Trond Ćien 3 years ago
That's actually sexy imo. Shows delightful sense of humor as well, and that is very sexy :)
#6
Always Asked For A Skateboard As A Kid. My Parents Said Not Until I'm 35. Today They Delivered
ć chihuahua n. 3 years ago (edited)
He looks so happy! Edit: ty for the upvotes, this is the most i've ever gotten!
Chihuahua Schombel 3 years ago
Hi, is your name Chihuahua or do you have a Chihuahua? Please answer š :)
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C W 3 years ago
Thereās a big difference between falling off a skateboard at nine and falling off a skateboard at 35. Much better to learn as a child.
Notnow 3 years ago
Kids have a no-fear attitude. I miss that attitude myself.
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Moxie Mallahan 3 years ago
I can definitely see the Jim Carrey. Don't know where you see Chris Evans though.
Load More Replies... First, we have to realize that being misunderstood is one of those common things that are virtually impossible to get rid of altogether. As long as we are a community, we will misunderstand each other. Nevertheless, it still puzzles us.
“People say they want to learn to express themselves more clearly so that they won't be misunderstood. When we are misunderstood, we think it is because we chose the wrong words. We didn't convey our ideas properly. Or we blame the other person. We expressed ourselves perfectly clearly, but they misinterpreted us. They got the wrong idea out of what we said,” Lambert explains on his website How Communication Works.
#7
Experts Recommend Keeping Your Daily Rituals Even While Working From Home
Sathe Wesker 3 years ago
I completely agree. However I also stand by the fact the that the tile would f**k with my head.
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Randy BluntRandyo5 3 years ago
"Attention guests, PLEASE be seated, buckle up, we will be arriving in .... airport base momentarily"..Vic
#8
Mom Told Her Daughter To Grab Her Mask So They Can Go To The Store. This Was The Mask She Grabbed
Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago
Hey, it covers her nose and mouthā¦ which is more than I can say for most customers who roll through the store I work atā¦
Katrin Krueger 3 years ago
Yep, those who whine, "but we're harming our kids with these masks!" but don't really care about OUR kids (what else do they do to protect children apart from those things that conveniently serve their own purpose?).
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Someone Somewhere 3 years ago
This has got to be one of the strongest pictures I have seen. Straight boss!!
Hannah Edwards 3 years ago
I love everything about this photo! Adorable and badass at the same time.
#9
My Buddy Was Told He Could Wear A Costume
Kitty Candy 3 years ago
Oh nooo!! Army shark do doo do do dooo... earworm again >< thanks :D
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Tracy Wallick 3 years ago
Believe me, if we were allowed to wear costumes to work instead of uniforms on Halloween, we absolutely would. (Source: am in the military)
Load More Replies... Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago
This would be me. I can dress up/wear a costume?! Oh, friend, youāre going to regret giving me THAT freedom >:3
Ki Li 3 years ago
What do you mean? This is a picture of 1 person. I can't see anyone else besides the shark man.
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Uncle Bud 3 years ago
Former Navy guy here and I was thinking what you posted.
Load More Replies...But Lambert argues that it's not that simple. “It's not about putting our ideas into words and having other people decode our words and extract our ideas,” he writes. “It's about saying and doing things in the world so that other people, drawing on mutual knowledge about you, the context, language, and how the world works, can make accurate inferences about your beliefs, emotions, attitudes, plans, goals, and intentions.”
#10
Found Some Amazing Indian Writing
Subrata Pradhan 3 years ago
I am an Indian , so if i write anything 9including this comment) should be considered as Indian writing.
Sathe Wesker 3 years ago
I love this dudes sense of humour about it. They so deserve more, but having humility and laughter is a wonderful thing in the toughest of times.
#11
My Dad Asked Me If I Wanted An Egg Sandwich. I'm Not Even Mad, This Is Genius
unfilteredCigarette73 3 years ago
All day! Ex-breakfast cook here (24/7 truckstop), that looks amazing! Lo- carb, basted eggs, genius indeed, i would sell this.
Kayjunmoon 3 years ago
Good idea. Something salty in it like anchovies and a slice of buffalo mozzarella.
#12
Told My Boyfriend I Was Getting Him A Burger For Christmas
Roxy Eastland 3 years ago
Brilliant. Are these sheets of wrapping paper you can buy or did the person print them out? I want to know how to do this!
Mike Schantini 3 years ago
Unless there is a real burger in there he is probably going to be disappointed.
Sathe Wesker 3 years ago (edited)
And Iām pretty sure they are all books! I would LOOOVE THIS!! Edit; if my man did this for me he would be a very, very happy man later that night.
According to him, when communication breaks down, it is a breakdown in this inferential problem-solving process, not a breakdown in encoding or decoding. “Avoiding misunderstanding means supporting this inferential process, or, when possible, minimizing the need for inference by being explicit,” he says.
#13
They Asked For A Lion Cut, They Got It
pink_panda 3 years ago
This is awesome! Can we please make this the default grooming for this breed?
Ann Pattinson 3 years ago
Isn't that fur , the missing parts, supposed to be there to protect its skin?
Lizzy Crit 3 years ago
Not this kind of hair coat. Most dogs have a fur coat, grows to a certain length and that's it. But some have a hair coat that just grows constantly and therefore needs to be cut regularly, like human hair. It's really only the double coats, winter breeds with very thick undercoats like Huskies, that should never be cut ever. Because the undercoat does protect from heat, as well as shaving will cause it permanent damage. Also doggos can sunburn, so if you have a short coated or shaved pupper, protect them from the sun.
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#14
There You Go
Sophhh 3 years ago
lol I donāt understand what people expect when they text there customers this š¤£
Will Cross 3 years ago
I was thinking maybe a screenshot of the order number and the information on whether it was delivered yet. You know the info that has track shipment and will show you it has been delivered or still in route? That's the only thing I can think of to prove it has not been delivered. Most carriers are good about scanning items as delivered on their end.
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Peeka_Mimi 3 years ago
I didn't get my cherries from Instacart and they wanted me to explain it to them. I wrote: I ordered cherries. I paid for cherries. I did not receive cherries.
#15
Fifty Shades Of Gray
Sathe Wesker 3 years ago
Oh my god this reminds me SO much of high-school. I was a little dark, the teachers knew it but still knew I was also being bullied so they saw the ādoubled edge swordā so to speak, I freaking came to school with cereal boxes taped to me and fake, retractable plastic knives stuck through them allā¦. I was a ācerealā killer. I got a lot of laughs from the teachers but just succeeded in freaking out my peers more. I donāt regret a thing.
Vanessa Richardson 3 years ago
For work, I once put a bunch of number stickers all of my clothes and went as āsomeone you can count on.ā Lol
So in order to avoid being misunderstood, Lambert’s advice is to ask yourself whether there is enough common ground to support accurate inference. “Accurate inference requires mutual knowledge, i.e., a set of facts that we share in common. We make assumptions about what other people know and what they know we know, and what they know we know they know, etc.”
What’s important to understand is that these assumptions are often wrong. “When the doctor tells the patient to put the patch on a different place every day, she assumes the patient knows to take yesterday's patch off. Dangerous assumption,” Lambert explained. To avoid misunderstanding, it’s always great to check your assumptions about mutual knowledge, and where it's lacking, do the work needed to fill in the gaps.
#16
My Cousin Wanted Cake And Ordered One. Told The Bakers To Write Whatever They Wanted Because It Was For Just For Her Anyway
The Other Guest 3 years ago
As a former grocery store cake decorator, I'm impressed with those writing skills. Getting that many letters on a cake that size, using gel no less, and still having it be neat and legible? Well done. Well done indeed.
#17
Can You Talk Real Quick?
Chaotic-Pansexual (she/they) 3 years ago
Overactive group chats probably. Iāve been there. Had to leave because of the chaos
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Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago
I wish my dad were still alive (he died in 2000 when I was 18). I guarantee you heād be a dad-joke kind of dad, like this XD
HAL 3 years ago (edited)
Shoot yeah! I once tried to sing one of his fastest songs, and I bit my tongue :p
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#18
Garlic Powder
Who Panda 420 3 years ago
When my kid brother was asked about his summer at school he said he pleaded the 5th. His teacher though it was great and had to tell me. We lived in a crazy area and I had always taught him about his fifth amendment right.
flutterbyy 3 years ago
My favourite season is season 7 of How I met your mother; everything went downhill from there.
Another tip from Lambert is to ask yourself if the person knows you well enough to realize when you're speaking literally or not. “Most of what we communicate, we communicate indirectly, by saying one thing and meaning much more,” he argues and adds that it’s efficient when people share enough knowledge and know each other well enough.
However, “When people do not know you well, they will be unsure when to take you literally and when to use inference to go beyond what you said to get at what you really meant. Avoid irony, sarcasm, and other forms of indirect, non-literal speech when speaking to people who may not know you well enough not to take you literally,” Lambert suggests.
#19
Asked For My Cheese Steak To Be Made With Love. They Delivered
That_Sexy_Dinosaur 3 years ago
At least they took the time to write that on every one thats so sweet
āš¦š£š£_šššš 3 years ago
When made from the heart, it'll certainly make you fart.
#20
I Asked My 5-Year-Old To Keep An Eye On His Sister While I Served Him Dinner, I Peek Out Of The Kitchen And Find Him Like This. His Sister Is In Good Hands
Who Panda 420 3 years ago
All I can see is that playpen snapping and him falling on the little girl.
Kevin Garren 3 years ago
Nah, it'll flip over, girl will go flying through the air... but have no fear, that's what the web shooters are for!
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That_Sexy_Dinosaur 3 years ago
He is going to be a great bigger brother to that little girl š„°š
#21
Not Gonna Lie, This Is A Little Too Accurate
Zedrapazia 3 years ago
Just commenting here to hide an ugly comment: The task never specified how the question was supposed to be answered, so technically their answers were correct.
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similarly 3 years ago
As a teacher, let me say: if you didn't get the answer you wanted, maybe you should have asked a different question. Don't count it wrong just because they didn't read your mind.
BadCat 3 years ago (edited)
It was explained to be school is not about theory thinking and coming up with your own ideas and frame of mind. It's about just showing you paid attention and remember what you're taught. That's it. The teachers can tell you Greenland is tropical and still mark you wrong if you correct them. It's unnerving how much power the education system have over your educational success an knowledge. The curriculum is often false.
Load More Replies... Roxy Eastland 3 years ago
"Always available" is definitely an 'official' advantage (not everyone realises that a breast can't be 'empty' as the milk is constantly being made), and not needing to access fuel to boil water is also an important advantage, so not giving those two points is definitely p.i.s.s.y.
VodkaInMySweetTea 3 years ago
Came here to say this. I teach breastfeeding classes. #2&3 are legit answers.
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Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago
How are these wrong?! XD ā¦except maybe a little borderline on the last one, depending on personal preferences, of course.
Janet Graham 3 years ago
The teacher was dead wrong. All of these answers are correct. Probably not what she was looking for, but correct.
Spannidandoolar 3 years ago
As someone who is literally feeding right now, 2&3 are two of my main reasons, along with free and no washing up!
El Dee 3 years ago
I thought that the availability IS valid. Especially when there's been a shortage of formula and in poor countries the inability to afford formula..
Estelle Winwoode 3 years ago
As well as the difficulty of finding clean water around the clock in some places. Then finding fuel to boil water to sterilize equipment.
Load More Replies... #22
They Got What They Asked For
Nami Tantrum 3 years ago
Plz in german is short for Postleitzahl which means zip code... i was confused for a second
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#23
Picked It, Thanks
Chaotic-Pansexual (she/they) 3 years ago
Lol I love how happy the pup looks to be held. Big pups love acting like lap dogs
#24
They Asked Me To "Dress Like What You Want To Be When You Grow Up". So I Went With Retired On An Island
Meghna Mohan 3 years ago
Yessssss maaaaaaaaan, in true blue Jamaican accent, I need this and I'm so far away š
#25
My Brother's Camp Requires The Kids Write A Letter Home After The First Week
YHZ 3 years ago
What teenagers? This is camp--we had to do this from when we were little kids on up.
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Poeha 3 years ago (edited)
Those stupid forced letters. My son (at 12 or so) had to write something sugar sweet for a family member and she also looked what they wrote. My brother is called Henk. So he wrote: Dear Henk, You're so sweet and so dear to me and some other real cute stuff. Because our rabbit was also called Henk. He just wrote the letter to the rabbit. What does the teacher know.
Autistic apricot 3 years ago
Do they not check the messages? When I called my mum on a trip the person listened to what I was saying and told me to only say the good things
JMC5003 3 years ago
That's unnerving. You should be able to say anything you want to your parents. What were they trying to hide?
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Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago (edited)
Itās not like theyāre requiring the kids to do anything thatās a crime or anything that constitutes abuse or child slavery or child endangerment. Itās no worse than parents requiring a kid to do chores before video games, IMO. The camp is acting in loco parentis in this case. EDIT: just to be clear, I doubt the children are actually told that they will not be allowed to eat unless they write home. Having been a child once, this letter is sarcastic/slightly butthurt kid wit at its finest.
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#26
My Daughter When She Said She Wanted To Be A Transformer For Halloween
Nadine Bamberger 3 years ago
The face of a child that has already suffered through a lot of dad jokes lol.
That'sEndorable 3 years ago
That's fantastic. All she needs now is a squirrel on her shoulder that's about to get vaporized.
#27
I Was So Busy In The Kitchen I Didn't Know What To Do First, My Little Brother Asked Me What He Can Do To Help. I Told Him To 'Get That Bag Of Potato, Peel Half Of Them And Boil'
My little brother is a true genius.
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago
Honestly I prefer mashed potatoes with a little skin (if thatās what OP was making!) Red potatoes are better for it though :)
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Gabriela Cink 3 years ago (edited)
This reminds me once, when I told my husband to turn meat in the pan while I had to do something else. He didn't change the side of meat. He rotate them in the pan on the same side.
Janet Graham 3 years ago
My husband wanted to make chocolate chip cookies and I was busy. I showed him the recipe which was for sugar Cookies. I told him that when he was all done, add the chocolate chips. When I got done doing whatever I was doing, I went to check on him. He had taken the baked cookies out of the oven and was poking chocolate chips into them. Face palm!
#28
My Bro Told My Grandma, Jokingly, That He Wanted 100 Things From The Dollar Store For Christmas, Grandma Doesn't Like Being Challenged
Pollywog 3 years ago
At least she didn't but a 100 piece puzzle and wrap each piece individually!!!
Jo Johannsen 3 years ago
Oh, that would have been hilarious! You are a genius.
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BadCat 3 years ago
LOL This reminds me of my first invite to my (now ex) inlaw's gift exchange game. They said to bring a 20 dollar gifts. That's how I heard it 20 dollar gifts. So I went to the dollar store and got 20 items from the dollar store, wrapped them and came with a bag. I didn't realize it was 1 $20 item. The looks on their faces. I didn't know if they found humor in my mistake or were deeply offended.
JMC5003 3 years ago
I would have thought that was epic! They must not have a very good sense of humor.
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Sathe Wesker 3 years ago
Eh, depends on what province I guess. Iām in Ontario, Toronto specifically and we sure as hell aināt cheap but thatās why I love the dollar store. Maybe $100 American would be $200 (maaaaybe $250) Canadian. Still, I shop there.
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#29
Can't Blame The Answerer
El Dee 3 years ago
Well, the kid's right. That IS why we PAY taxes. The question should be worded like - why are taxes collected or what is done with taxes..
BadCat 3 years ago
It's not even our choice. I just realized I'm paying over $100 in taxes, and about $80 more in other deductions off my paycheque. I can't afford it. It just gets robbed, stolen off my pay.
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Mozzarella 3 years ago
Exactly! And this is why I do my taxes! I think. I havenāt done them in the past three years
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago
Friend! Get on that before you make more trouble for yourself!
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#30
My Buddy Jokingly Decided To Get A Henna Tattoo Of A Mustache While At The Beach. The Foreign Worker Didn't Understand What He Was Saying
So she asked him to write down what he wanted. This was the result
FranƧois CarrƩ 3 years ago
I wouldn't even be mad, this is the most original moustache I've ever seen.
unfilteredCigarette73 3 years ago
I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe that is..PERFECT š its not permanent im doing this for Halloween or something
#31
This Brazilian Girl Is A Big Fan Of K-Pop And All Korean Culture, So Her Father Without Understanding Much Wanted To Personalize Her Party
With the most famous Korean character he found
Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago
Still, what a good dad, he tried! He probably Googled āfamous Korean peopleā or āKorean celebrityā. Or maybe heās next-level and is trolling her XD
Jordan Westall 3 years ago
I'm thinking trolled. Kim is pretty well known all over the world
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Nefarious McFarious 3 years ago
I think Dad understood perfectly and executed the best Dad joke ever
#32
A First Grade Class Was Asked What They Would Say If The Pilgrims Showed Up At Their Door On Thanksgiving
Who Panda 420 3 years ago
Right? I wouldn't want any Puritans in my house. It would end up like an episode of Blackadder
Hannah Edwards 3 years ago
Nathaniel sits on a spike, I sit on Nathaniel, two spikes would be an extravagance!
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Moxie Mallahan 3 years ago
Indigenous Americans. Not Indians. Indians are from India.
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Daycare Attendant Sun 3 years ago
I don't want anyone in my house. My kitchen. Or in my bathrooms. I'm quite particular about my place, and my cat won't like it.
#33
My Wife Doesnāt Want Our Newborn Sonās Face Posted On Social Media, So She Asked Me To Censor It. Needless To Say, I Wonāt Be Asked To Do That Again
Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago
Actual question, would like legit replies (I donāt have kids so I donāt understand this): Why do parents wish their newbornās/babyās face to be censored on social media? Privacy? The child/adult that the baby is going to grow into wonāt resemble the babyās face that much, so why hide the babyās face? (If the parents donāt censor their faces, I donāt see what censoring the babyās does in terms of privacy.) Is it a ābaby canāt make their own decisions about whether or not they want their face posted online publiclyā thing? Iām not trying to be an a*s, Iām truly curious as Iāve never understood this!
Pam 3 years ago
People can use other people's pics to do any kind of sh*t they want. Imagine your face linked to fake news or something. With kids, even pedophil* needs to be cautiously avoided. Internet can be really dangerous.
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#34
Looking For People With TV On Their Wall
That_Sexy_Dinosaur 3 years ago
Guys lets upvote this random deleted comment!!
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Will Cross 3 years ago
Can someone explain this one to me please? I don't understand it. Some education from anyone would be very helpful.
boatpotatome 3 years ago
He asked for a picture of people. Not a picture of the TV. Guy delivered.
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Z Alexi 3 years ago
Beyond literal. Imagine being his offspring...forcing the kid to be 100% precise. Talkers dangle participles & prepositions all the time. The world won't end.
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We Are Now A Hands-Free State
#36
This Guy
#37
Why Indeed
Meghna Mohan 3 years ago
Love this š¤£ my husband back when we were dating always told me, when in doubt ask, don't assume. Assumption is the mother of all f*ups. Now i ask him way too many questions because he's not as easy to read as me. He hates it, and I told him that was what you told me in the first few days of courtship. He hates his own forethought š¤£
Hypoxia Smurf 3 years ago
I spied my favorite grafitti-pair in the restroom of an eatery at the corner of Hollywood & Vine long ago. 1st: "My mother made me a homosexual." 2nd: "If I give her yarn, will she make me one too?" Further up that toilet-stall wall was a fine verse: "Here I sit / On the pooper Giving birth to / A state trooper." Folk-poetry at its finest, hey?
Kurt Steinhaus 3 years ago
Kinda like the graffitti on the wall in the men's room "Waiting for Godot" and directly underneath was "Back in 5 min, Godot".
Tammilee Truitt 3 years ago
These "graffiti"s" " annoy me almost as much as the "gatherings" and "live laugh love" signs people hang on their walls inside their homes. I love the graffiti bombers such as this, though.
#38
He Is Simply Following Orders
#39
My Wife Is A Teacher And Found This While Marking An Assessment
Sleazy Weaver 3 years ago
i had a teacher who used checkmarks to mean "correct" & a different teacher who used checkmarks to mean "wrong, please CHECK your answer". completely ruins the point of having a symbol to mean something, if nobody can agree on a meaning...
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#40
My Son Wanted "Cold Hard Cash" For His Birthday
Who Panda 420 3 years ago
Like something like this happens every birthday
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Bobby 3 years ago
And your cashier is going to think that's disgusting sweaty money when it thaws
#41
Everytime Everywhere Follow The Signs
#42
My Sister In Law Told My Brother āUse Those DIY Books And Fix The Chair!ā Done
#43
Our Wedding Shower During Quarantine. We Made The Best Of What We Had
Fancy that 3 years ago
It also brought out a lot of creativity crazy people.
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El Dee 3 years ago
This is good but I never understood how shower can mean a party? It doesn't in other English speaking countries. Language is weird lol!
JMC5003 3 years ago
It refers to "showering" the guest(s) of honor with gifts; like raining down gifts upon them, figuratively speaking.
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š¦©Laneypoohš¦© 3 years ago
when I was little I thought a baby shower was when the expecting mom was in a shower while she watched all of the guests party. Fun am I right
#44
Some Kids Take Things A Little Too Literally
Trina Selleck 3 years ago
Reminds me of my daughter in kinder when the teachers spoke to me after class worried about her speechā¦ knowing how well she could speak, I was even more confused when they told me whyā¦ they asked her if she could count to 10ā¦ she replied yes.. they didnāt try ink she knew how to count to 10 or say the words out loudā¦ in front of them I asked her why didnāt she count to 10 when the teachers asked.. she replied āthey asked me could I count to 10 so I said yes because I can, they didnāt ask me to count to 10 so I didnāt. š¤¦āāļø Lol
Abigail Hill 3 years ago
Ohno I did this once when I was homeschooled. My brain must be so backwards.
#45
How Do You Want Your Sandwich Cut She Said. I Don't Care I Said. Turns Out I Do, Mildly
pink_panda 3 years ago
In the shape of a crane, please! Here's the silhouette.
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Oli 3 years ago
My only question is... why people use this kind of shity bred to make sandwich?
Sarah K 3 years ago
Cause squidgy white bread is amazing and tastes of childhood and comfort and dreams. How dare you speak ill of my childhood.
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#46
Every Year I Get My Boyfriend A Cake For His Birthday. This Year I Asked What Type He Wanted. He Said, āI Donāt Careā
Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago
Iām going to borrow this ideaā¦ XD Now, just to find out what cartoon/character my bf abhors the mostā¦ (but cake flavor will be his favorite, of course!!)
Who Panda 420 3 years ago
Maybe I'm showing my age but I would worst like to have a Barney the purple dinosaur cake. Barney the Bain of my youth
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Derek Dufrane 3 years ago
Can you spot the a*****e, I know you can, yes he is right there good job
D-m Keilman 3 years ago
Hubby got me one that read "Happy birthday ya grumpy old b***h". It was accurate.
Jason Marin 3 years ago
My dad got me a birthday cake once with a gorilla on it. He said he got it for me because I look like one. I think if I ever get a cake for my dad, it'll be one of a horse with an arrow pointing at the horses butt.
Daycare Attendant Sun 3 years ago
I would love to get a cake like this! Could I get one with Oscar the Grouch? Winnie the Pooh, perhaps? Freddy Fazbear? XD
Janet Graham 3 years ago
Perfect come back! I hope you had a party so he could blow out the candles with his friends and family.
#47
I Wonder What He's Gonna Do When He'll Become 90
James G. Currie 3 years ago
But...will he be ABLE to? That is the question! lol
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Susann Campbell 3 years ago
He will wash or have the wall painted from stains he made doing these things.
#48
Two Is Less Than Three
Mike Schantini 3 years ago
He could have only made 1 so I think you have yourself a good engineer there.
NinaRosario 3 years ago
This happened to me too! 'I don't need it <3' turned into 'I don't need it before 3' and someone had to walk half an hour to deliver a folder to me before a nonexistent deadline. Hearts are important.
Janet Graham 3 years ago
That will teach you! I never knew what that was until about a month ago. I saw 'less than 3', hooters, butt cheeks. I had no idea.
#49
This Is What A Human Hand Looks Like Under A Microscope
#50
My Friend's Tattoo. When Asked "What Does That Mean?" He Replies, "I Don't Know, I Don't Speak Chinese." That Is Literally What It Means
Gentleman Wolf 3 years ago (edited)
I always ask my boyfriend (who is Chinese) what random Chinese writing means when I see it in clearly not-Chinese places (like the really borderline racist slot games at some casinos near where I liveā¦) Usually the words translate into something that is semi-meaningless, like āGot shiny paidā as the name of a slot machine game, or āYes food eat fullā as the name of a restaurant. Itās not an actual, sensible, properly-grammatical sentence when the characters are strung together. I mean, I havenāt seen one as bad as a slot gameās name translating to āFleece the gullible!ā or anything, but yeahā¦ I feel like they could consult a native speaker to at least get the grammar correct instead of using Google Translate or just going with characters that look cool together.
Dillon Brown 3 years ago
You see this in reverse in Chinese culture too. There are some really funny pics out there of places/people in china with funny tshirts and signs with English printed on them. In my Amazon stuff I always read the little notes from the Chinese factories, sometimes they get almost there but still hilariously wrong š¤£
Load More Replies... BadCat 3 years ago
My English teacher said to the class on a random note to never get a foreign symbol or word tattooed on you unless you really know the language well. He asked us what is something on us that means something. He said one girl mentioned a tattoo of a Chinese symbol she thought meant hope or love, something like that. A dude behind her laughed cos he knew it actually said "s**t". He told the teacher at the end of class when she was out of the room. At least he left her with the dignity she thinks she has.
Leanne Franson 3 years ago
I can read that. Though my Chinese is pretty limited. It really makes me want to get this. Just to be able to chuckle when people ask, and I truthfully tell them what it says.
Luna Crow 3 years ago
I really hope that's actually what it says. This is the best use I've seen of the Asian character tattoo trend
Leanne Franson 3 years ago
I can read enough Chinese characters to read this. That is absolutely what it says. "I don't know" (Wo bu jidao) "I don't speak Chinese" (Wo bu hui shuo Zhong Guo hua). In very nice clear writing.
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Leanne Franson 3 years ago
It is "hui", which means "able to" ... "I don't know. I am not able to speak Chinese". :)
Load More Replies... #51
He's Turned Them Into The Literal Metallica Band
In too many fandoms 3 years ago
Yeah I saw a lot of posts about him on Bored Panda, he is everything but boring!
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I'm Kid A 3 years ago
If Formosa reads this by some chance, your first pic is pretty much fine as it is. You don't want to look like you're trying too hard. Though maybe take the pic somewhere that doesn't look like Sears' photo studio. Maybe just in front of... idk, a slightly weathered brick wall? Get creative. This isn't your senior portrait. Second photo is far more eye-catching, though. And to the editor... nicely done.
#52
As God Intended
"Which is right? Under / Over. Who will win? Vote with your bum"
James G. Currie 3 years ago (edited)
Over was "right," but is not necessarily "correct"... ;) lol
#53
My Korean Mom Asked Me If Her Friends Can Come Over To My Place And "Pull My Wood." Having No Idea What This Was, I Was So Relieved They Only Wanted To Do This
Hannah Edwards 3 years ago
Played it recently with little instructions written on some of the blocks. Saying things like, one finger next go, use left hand or use foot!
IlovemydogShilo 3 years ago
I am definately calling Jenga "Pull My Wood" from now on. That is hilarious. š¤£š¤£š¤£
Glen Moore 3 years ago
Still had them come over, not knowing which "wood" was getting pulled.....My Man!!!
#54
I Can Make The Gap Bigger If Youād Like
Panda poster 3 years ago
Always with the even numbers chad, always with the even numbers. š¤¦
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#55
I Always Follow The Rules
#56
Literally
#57
When I Asked My Little Bro Why There Were Polar Bears And Penguins In The Freezer, He Answered "Because That Is Where They Belong"
Theo Blackwood 3 years ago
Reminds me of when I had a carrot plush and put it in the fridge because thatās where he lived.
#58
When You Ask For A Half Pint In Ireland They Take It Literally
#59
Just Finished The New Pool And Deck
John L 3 years ago
I don't know...that last board doesn't look nailed down properly.....those short falls, can be the worst.
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Kevin Garren 3 years ago
Technically the deck should be around the pool, but do what you gotta do lol
della by the sea 3 years ago
That good boi in the background is wondering when he can have his pool back lol
FranƧois CarrƩ 3 years ago
Now that's the solarpunk pool we all need. Just refreshing your a*s without wasting tons of water and material.
#60
Did My Job Boss. Barber Shaves Triangle Into Man's Hair After He Pauses Video Of A Model He Wanted To Look Like
James Tartaglione 3 years ago
wonder how many people pushed that triangle, and how long it took him to be over it
#61
The Box For My Daughter's Bath Bomb Said It Had A Calming Message Inside
#62
Told Abby This Is Where She Can Put Her Letters For Santa. So She Gathered Her Toy Letters And Put Them In For Santa
#63
My Sister Asked For A Nintendo Switch For Christmas. Her Boyfriend Must Have Misunderstood
#64
This Domino Effect On The Domino's Delivery Scooter
#65
I Asked My Boyfriend To Bring Me An Ice Cream Sandwich, I Am Exhausted From This Disrespect
Sophia Ramsey 2 years ago
ngl i would eat it ĀÆ\_(ć)_/ĀÆ an ice cream sandwich is an ice cream sandwich, after all!
Bored_NorWeirdian 3 years ago
What is av ice cream sandwich? Can someone please explain? Thank youš
Marleinah Evans 3 years ago
I'm wondering what they have that she actually wanted instead of the bread
#66
When You Get Told You Can Only Use One Side Of A Piece Of Paper To Write Formulas For The Final
Daniel Yamada 3 years ago
I had gone back to college to start a new career and was in a course where we were allowed to use both sides of a 3" x 5" card to write final exam notes. I have a background in graphic design/desktop publishing. I was able to print ALL of the course notes in a tiny font size on the card. Then I went to the dollar store and bought their most powerful reading glass so I could read the notes during the test. I scored 100%.
#67
A Customer Called Asking If We Were Practicing Social Distancing With Her Sandwiches. I Told Her We Are, But To Be Honest Guys I'm Running Out Of Space
#68
My Brother Had To Work, So He Asked Me To Save Him A Little Bit Of Everything
Jaden Alexander 3 years ago
It was all good and funny until I realized there was no pie. Now THAT is evil.
Carol Emory 3 years ago
That's like a coworker that complained that everyone ate the sausage pizza and he didn't get a piece. I found a small piece of cheese pizza (size of a quarter) in the box and a piece of sausage. Put them together and took it to him on a platter. Told him to hurry and eat it before someone else did. He laughed.
#69
Me To My Class, "Okay Boys And Girls, Hang Up Your Snacks So We Can Go Into Art Class!" I Laughed So Hard. I Love Kindergarten
#70
It Seems That Malicious Compliance Begins At The Young Age
Gabriela Cink 3 years ago
Hahahah. This reminds me, when my dad was helping me with homework about triagles.We were learning that you need only 3 data to create a correct triagle. After an hour my dad ended somewhere how many data you need to create ellipse, hyperbole and parabole. I was 7 then. He would teach me multiplication of fractions in this case for sure :D.
#71
My Coworker Decided He Wanted A Standing Desk
Daniel Yamada 3 years ago
But sadly, no chance for promotion. This person is too smart to be a manager.
Jill Hojnacki 3 years ago
Thatās where we used to hide the beer to keep it cold on the night shift.
#72
My Friend Works For A Contracting Company That Is Renovating A Hotel. They Asked For Room Numbers, With Braille On The Bottom For Blind People To Read
This is what their supplier sent them. Every single one is like this
El Dee 3 years ago
I've always wondered about braille signs - how do blind people know where they are? I'm being serious. Those with the most severe blindness won't know where to feel for them or even if a sign exists. This 'shower thought' has bothered me for years..
Emiloy 3 years ago (edited)
Itās a good question to ask! Blind people use other tools to orient themselves to the sign, whether itās someone giving them directions, being familiar with the space, or just feeling around on the side of the door once theyāve got there (using cane or guide dog) to see if thereās a sign. Itās not perfect, but itās a valuable piece of the puzzle - better to have imperfect ways of confirming information than none at all. And even if thereās not braille, tactile elements like raised numbers and letters can help too. [Note that Iām not blind or low vision, just have acquaintances who are, so if anyone with direct experience can expand any of this Iām interested too. Also If you want more info Molly Burke does a lot of education online about blindness and adaptions]
Load More Replies... Marleinah Evans 3 years ago
These would be getting sent back, and I'd be on the phone asking if they are okay
#74
Asked Wife To Write A Small List For The Grocery Store. She's Not Wrong
#75
A Tight Squeeze, But I'll Do My Best
Sleazy Weaver 3 years ago
you think it's a squeeze now? wait until you obey the sign & drag a small child with you!
Mali Holdaway 3 years ago
This one scares me to look at, we used to walk over that bridge for school outings, back then there was this strange 6+ inch gap right where he is standing running the full length of the bridge. Unfortunately they did not correct the gap and also add nets until after a toddler, holding their parent's hand, fell through said gap.
Load More Replies... #76
Pizza Shop Asked Me "Who's Name Do You Want The Order Under?" I Replied "My Wife Michelle". This Is How They Announced Her Name When She Picked Up The Food
Shawn Gula 3 years ago
Called in a phone order for 4 pizzas, he asked my name and I said Shawn. All four boxes had CHON written on them. My girls still call me MommaChon because of those pizza boxes
#77
I Asked My 17-Year-Old Son What He Wanted To Eat For Breakfast
Marleinah Evans 3 years ago
Ah, a smartarse....a bowl of "I don't care..." so rude, and he got what he asked for, and deserved. Hope he learns some manners.
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago (edited)
What if he genuinely didnāt know what he felt like eating? (Also by the way, IDK means āI donāt knowā not āI donāt care.ā) Heās a kid whoās still learning how to be a functioning human in society, I doubt he had malicious intent here. Itās annoying Iām sure but the response is kinda cute and funny š and now heāll learn to help out the person who is offering to make him a meal by telling them what he would be okay with eating at that moment! (edit for spelling mistakes)
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#78
Touch With Eyes Only, Thank You
#79
I Am Picking My Wife Up At The Airport After A Long Trip. A Friend Said To Bring Her Some Nice Flours As A Surprise. I Am Bringing Her A Basket Full Of Her Favorite Flours
Marleinah Evans 3 years ago
The first "flours" should be spelled the as the ones she asked for...."flowers"
#80
I Asked My Teacher For A Note To Go To The Library. He Gave Me This. They Didn't Let Me Into The Library Because I "Didn't Have A Whole Note"
That'sEndorable 3 years ago
Next time he wants to joke like that, he should make sure the whole staff is in on it.
Load More Replies... #81
I Asked My Sister To Knit Us A Sweater For Christmas. I Think She Took It A Little Too Literally
#82
I Told My Teenager To Unload The Dishwasher Before Going Out With His Friends For The Evening
Kevin Garren 3 years ago
I mean, you didn't say to put the dishes away... that's not his problem lol
Berdarien Brown 3 years ago
Before I went out once my mom said I had to hang up my clothes and handed me a large basket of clothes.. i took two hangers put one in each side of the basket and hung up the basket. Left the house and she came outside to yell at me. I told her I hung them up! She made me walk in and show her. Then said " oh f**k you. Go have fun" :)
#83
We Ordered A Pound Of Carrots. We Got A Pound Of Carrot
Tequila Mockingbird 3 years ago
And when you need to compare the size of the banana you use this carrot for scale!
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Carol Rohn 3 years ago
That's how all the carrots in Korea are and I love them!! Always sweet, never bitter and you need only one to grate for carrot cake.
#84
My Dad Told Me There Were Brownies In The Pan
Grudge-holding Treefrog 3 years ago
I did this to my teachers on April Fools Day. I got them all
Mark Zaricor 3 years ago
Could have written jokes on some of them and then asked people if they wanted regular brownies or funny brownies.
#85
Someone Took The Drive Thru Sign A Bit Too Literally
Mary Rogers 3 years ago
That's like when my sister first started driving and she accidentally ran into the Target Store.
#86
I Asked My Thai Place To Make It So Spicy Someone Would Get In Trouble. They Gave Me This
#87
When You Order Two Cakes With "Happy Birthday" On Them But Get This Instead
Dillon Brown 3 years ago
How much do you want to bet that this is from some chain restaurant with a bakery and a manager who says literally right whatever they type in the box!
Load More Replies... Bored_NorWeirdian 3 years ago (edited)
Looks more like muffin's than cake? Looks very yummy no matter what it isš§š„§š° EDIT: maybe i'm the stupid one and the muffin's instead of cake was the point? Thought the fail was what they wrote on them? I'm little confused.
#88
I Ordered An Espresso Shot Over Ice This Morning
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago
No wait (as a coffee fan) I think this is actually a really considerate way to serve it for customers who donāt want a lukewarm watery drink 5 minutes later! If I ordered this in a drive thru on my way to work Iād really appreciate this :)
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Dav Carro-Ripalda 3 years ago
That is the correct way. If you use sugar on your coffee it is easy to dissolve on hot liquids. So you put your sugar on the hot coffee, dissolve it correctly and then you put your sweet coffee over the ice. The guy who prepared that is a good barista.
Nadine Debard 3 years ago
If you want it right, you have to put the hot espresso on the ice just before drinking, so it's not that bad.
I'm Kid A 3 years ago
TBH, I woulda appreciated this, especially if I wanted to wait until I got to work to drink it. It's kind of genius. I could take the espresso cup off of the ice, the ice would melt a tiny amount at room temp instead of a massive amount at... uhm, espresso temp, then I could drain the water out of the melted ice once I got to work, pour the espresso in and enjoy a not-watered-down espresso over barely melted ice. Or I could leave the cup against the ice, letting it cool down while still giving me the option of draining out the excess water. I'm seriously going to order things like this from now on. I'm a little obsessive over my drinks not tasting watery. Unless it's water.
#89
I Think There Was A Bit Of A Misunderstanding Here
#90
So I Ordered A Lettuce Burger, Thinking It Would Come With Two Pieces Of Lettuce
Susan Bosse 3 years ago
I've never heard of a lettuce burger. I would have thought you wanted lettuce and no meat. Lol
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago (edited)
Theyāre pretty common in Canada at least! A large percentage of restaurants will substitute lettuce for a bun here. I worked at a gourmet fancy burger place once that would use 2-4 pieces of specially selected and cut romaine if you wanted a lettuce wrap, drizzled in our homemade garlic aioli and then with all the burger toppings you wanted. Iām not GF but I used to get it often for the calorie/carb savings and also because that extra juicy saucy crunch is delicious around goopy stringy melted cheese and tender juicy beef š
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Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago
(The price of lettuce just skyrocketed over here because of the flooding in Queensland).
Load More Replies... Carol Emory 3 years ago
Lettuce wrapped almost always are to large slices of iceberg lettuce heads. This is the way they do it at Red Robin. I usually eat it with a knife and fork.
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago
I used to work at a very well known steak restaurant chain - theyād slice 1/4 out of a head of ice burg lettuce, pour a simple pre-made tomato/onion/bacon/breadcrumb crumble over it, and give it a little ranch on the side. $16 š I hated making it because it took less than a minute but I knew it was a giant ripoff
Load More Replies... Llama_flower93 3 years ago
They are probably gluten intolerant, not trying to be healthy in this moment.
Load More Replies... #91
I Think They Took The Term "Hand Soap" A Bit Too Literally
Squirrel Girl 3 years ago
imagine needing to use the bathroom in the middle of the night and you see that...
#92
He Did What They Asked
Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago
Hopefully the dog has a long enough muzzle to reach the water!
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Kelley Baltierra 3 years ago
The dog can still drink out of it...or it'll knock it over and still be able to drink it
#93
Told Him To "Please Line The Shoes Up By The Back Door"
#94
I've Found It In My Childhood Stuff Box And Now I'm Wondering If 7-Year-Old Me Was An Idiot Or A Genius
#95
Taking A Sign Too Literally
LinkTheHylian 3 years ago
I have senior parking... it's terrible, and you should apologise to the owner of that hedge.
#96
My Kid Said I Gave Her Too Many Grapes. I Said Just Eat Half Of Them
#97
When You Ask Your Darling Husband To Bring You Socks And Put On Your Cold Feet
Gemma jones 3 years ago
When I hurt my back I couldnāt even bend to get dressed and my husband put my socks on for me. Love him
#98
They Asked And I Did
#99
Ordered A Hot Dog With Ketchup Only. They Sorta Got It Right
OGA 3 years ago
If we're being literal, a hotdog with ketchup only would be a hotdog with ketchup, no bun.
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago (edited)
I worked at a burger restaurant - if someone said āonly ketchupā Iād say āok so meat, bread, ketchup, and thatās it?ā (Bonus points if I remember to ask ācheese?ā because Iāve saved at least 1 mom from a meltdown that way.) Gotta confirm those orders people, Iāve been corrected like āno! I said just ketchup no bun!ā and āno I said just ketchup - no meat! Just bun and ketchup, do you have hearing problems?!!ā customers donāt know the menu as well as we do and -especially when they have kids - are just doing their best! Just be nice to retail workers if they mess up, I guarantee 99% of the time it isnāt spiteful (cause they know the customer will come back/leave a bad review) we just want to get you your food and move on to the next task!
Load More Replies... Kevin Garren 3 years ago
Have had something similar happen at a fast food place, ordered my food and was getting a hamburger with just mustard and ketchup for somebody else and they didn't give me the bun.
#100
Literally
Random Panda 3 years ago (edited)
"Soo.. just a metal plate?" "Yes" "NAH F**K THIS S**T IM ENGRAVING THAT"
#101
Quite A Few People Took This Sign Literally
Jen T 3 years ago
People dropped quarters in the water instead of using their quarters to buy fish food.
Load More Replies... #102
Not Sure They Intended For The "Grand Opening" Sign To Become Quite So Literal
#103
They Asked For A Recent Photo
#104
Took It Literally
#105
My Son Wanted To Feel Like He Had An Important Role In Helping Me Cook. Told Him To Keep An Eye On The Oven Tray
#106
I Ordered A "Sprinkle Donut". They Took It Very Literally
Bored_NorWeirdian 3 years ago
š± the donut having a pimple! Glad the rest of it wasen't yellowš¤¢
#107
Please Flush
LinkTheHylian 3 years ago
This must be one of those counterfeit W***y Wonka bars I read about recently.
dream of delusion 3 years ago
donāt tell me theyāre censoring will yā¦.
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#108
My Boyfriend Ordered A Plain Pizza. Literally
Kevin Garren 3 years ago
To be fair, what is a plain pizza? Never heard that. Is it just sauce and cheese? Is that not a "cheese pizza" then? lol
John Smith 3 years ago
I remember someone complaining to Dominos that they had got a pizza delivered with no sauce or toppings. turned out he opened the box upside down.
#109
Don't Get A Tattoo In A Language You Don't Understand. This Is Supposed To Be Butterfly In Hebrew, But Instead It's A Literal Translation As In Butter-Fly
RedBadgerCan'tSwim 3 years ago
While I have no problem with tattoos, I have never understood getting one in a language you don't speak. Except maybe fictional languages.
Lsai Aeon 3 years ago
I don't know, I kinda liked the tattoo that guy had that said "I don't know, I don't speak Chinese"
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Daniel Yamada 3 years ago
I can read Japanese and Chinese. I worked with a lady who thought she had a "Surfer Girl" tattoo in Chinese. It actually read "Wet Pants". I also met a guy who thought he had a ""Cool Dude" tattoo in Chinese. It actually read "Frozen Sausage".
FranƧois CarrƩ 3 years ago
I have no problem with flying butter, as long as I can catch it when needed for my cooking.
Lindsey Judd-Bruder 3 years ago
I have a Hebrew tattoo on my arm. BUT, my husband is Jewish, and can read it himself. So I know it says what it says. š
Mary Rogers 3 years ago
You do realize that mix-ups happen when dealing with foreigners, right? They probably didn't understand what she wanted.
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#110
My Girlfriend Wanted A Sponge Cake. Still Not Sure What's The Problem
B šŗš¦šØš¦ 3 years ago (edited)
From eastern Canada - we have petit-fours too :) usually a little less sponge-y
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#111
On The Package, It Was Written: "Heat To 120 Degrees." I Don't Know Why It's Not Ready Yet
Kevin Garren 3 years ago
When I was younger, but let's be honest, old enough that this was embarrassingly stupid... the directions say "let stand for 2 minutes" which means take it out of the microwave and basically let it cool for 2 minutes. But that's not what I did. I stupidly did it for 2 additional minutes while I stood there...
ohjojo (you/your's) 3 years ago
Famous Three stooges act. Take a pill and skip 3 hours. They took a pill and jumped rope for 3 hours.
Kristel 3 years ago
How did you get down voted for this? I loved the math humor!
Load More Replies... #112
My Son Asked The Elf To Bring Him A Nintendo Switch. He Found This In His Stocking This Morning And Was Sorely Disappointed
He is now drawing a picture for the elf, trying to help him know what he really wanted
Scagsy 3 years ago
You know, it wasn't even funny the first time. Just some smart-a**e prank to pull on someone and disappoint them completely. That's not funny, it's mean.
Load More Replies... John L 3 years ago
That's cruel. One thing to do it to your girlfriend, who is an adult....but to a child is just plain, cruel.
Carol Emory 3 years ago
Ok..I worked at Nintendo and I can say with confidence that this is not a Nintendo Authorized Product!
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